December 2023 – Life Off Headset

Weekly recap + What we ate: Tech/Open/Closing

Well, this post has been sitting in my draft folder for over a week, so no, it is really, not “last” week’s recap, but from two weeks ago, but this time has been very full, so where we are. But this is what I’ve been up to….

~~Last week~~ Two weeks ago, was a whirlwind week in the theatre. We were in the theatre Tuesday and then we had tech, opening, four shows over the weekend (really five if you count the 11:30am dress rehearsal on the day of Opening), and then closing. It’s been a super intense schedule.

Things that made the week great despite often working 12 hours a day with barely a dinner break:
– The show itself. It’s a beautiful show. The music is by turns catchy and moving, the story makes me cry and laugh and makes my heart grow.
– The other people on the stage management team. Who care just enough to do an amazing job but not so much that the hard stuff gets in the way of just getting stuff done.
–The crew at the theatre. So this show went up in the smallest of the theatres that we perform in. I love this crew so much! The two lead technicians are always positive while at the same time being realistic about the limitations of the space – they solve problems without drama and don’t get annoyed when we ask for too much. Everyone is really nice and really good at what they do. There was one day when I wanted to take spike measurements (Spikes are the pieces of tape we put on the floor to tell us where the furniture or people or props need to be placed – we measure where they are so when we remount the show, we know where we put everything). This isn’t something we always have time to do, and sometimes is is painfully slow because we only have two crew members helping us. This time, after one show, the crew basically swarmed the stage and got it done in twenty minutes. I don’t know if I can convey how amazing it was, but it was amazing.
Also – the crew moved my stage management console to the house (what we call where the audience sits) so that I could spend the first few days of tech out front. This is only important because usually I tech from backstage, where I can’t really see anything, and being able to tech from the front and see the show is actually quite helpful.

The Lighting designer snapped this picture of me at my console, which is kind of fun.

I very rarely get pictures of me working, so I was tickled by this. I’m standing at my console, which has four tiny monitors – one so I can see the conductor, one so I can see the stage, one infared so I can see the stage when it’s dark, and one that has the lighting cues so I can keep track and make sure we are in the correct light cue. The monitors are kind of small, so it was nice to start tech rehearsals out front to I could better see what was going on before moving backstage. Also, yes, I stand on a box to call because I’m short and the console was sized for someone taller than me.
–The audience. Seeing families and little kids coming to the theatre – man, nothing warms my heart like that.
–The Husband. I know I say this all the time, but I really couldn’t have my job without him. The gold star this time, though, goes to him for bringing all three kids to a dress rehearsal for my show. Taking kids to an 8pm show on a weeknight isn’t exactly a stress-free activity, so major props to him for doing that. I love that the kids got to see what I was working on – apart from it being a great show for kids, it lets them see what mom is doing when she isn’t at home in the evenings. I think it’s kind of abstract to them what I do and why I’m gone, and I feel like it helps when they get to see me at work.
-Climbing 13 flights of stairs to the theatre every morning. My show was in one of the smaller theatres, way at the top of the arts complex. There is an elevator, but to get there from the parking garage involves either cutting through the backstage of another theatre, or walking through the orchestra pit, where there is this sign:

So the most direct route is to take the stairs. Some days, I figured, if I did nothing else that day, at least I climbed 13 flights of stairs.

The one moment I lost my will to continue.
This is my work computer:

As you can see, the power button is, brilliantly, located next to the backspace and delete button. There was one evening, I had about an hour before rehearsal to crank out a piece of paperwork that was kind of key to the top of show sequence. It had been a crazy busy day and I finally had time to sit down and do this chart and people were arriving for their make-up calls and the hallways were starting to buzz with anticipation and activity as people got ready for the rehearsal. I made a typo, and hit “backspace” to correct it, but accidentally hit the power button and the computer shut down, taking my paperwork into the ether. I put my head down on my computer for five seconds of utter despair, screamed a little inside and then sighed and moved on with life.

So all in all, a good but exhausting week. It has left me very behind on all things holiday, and so that part of life feels a little … unprepared.

The Annoying/Upsetting life admin:

In my continuing saga to renew my driver’s liscence – I finally got to the MVA and… their card reader was down. Argh. I had to yet again re-schedule my driver’s license renewal.

Then the four year old finally had her dentist appointment and has a jaw-dropping five cavities. So she also has to be scheduled for crowns, which requires sedating her, and the next available appointment they had was actually the day that I had re-scheduled my driver’s license appointment. Wump wump. So I guess the license is being re-scheduled again. I am completely flabbergasted by the state of my children’s teeth. And the four year old even flosses. I mean not every day, but at least a couple times a week. So I am going to have to be more diligent about the teeth:
1) consistent brushing in the morning – I’ve set an alarm reminder for this.
2) I need to do a pass with the toothbrush when they are done. I’ve been told that my kids have naturally very deep grooves in their teeth, which makes for good places for bacteria to grow.
3) no more gummy candies and cut down on the sugar. I love Welch’s fruit snacks, but I guess I’ll take one for the team and stop buying them. Or just stash them at the office.

On the bright side, the dentist said that once they had crowns, they wouldn’t have to floss those teeth. He actually almost said they wouldn’t really have to brush back there, but I think he realized he shouldn’t really be saying that and stopped himself.

Outfit of the week –
Not very interesting this week because we’ve been in tech and performances. Tech is the one time where I always wear pants because I have to be up and moving around a lot. I try to wear colourful clothes during tech so I can be seen easily onstage. I didn’t take any photos this time, but maybe next tech I will – I basically pretty much wear the same two or three outfits every time I tech a show. For performances, I wear all black. People sometimes say, “You must have a lot of black clothes since you work backstage.” Truth to tell, nope. Here are the two outfits that I cycle between when I’m running a show:

My black wardrobe for cooler weather is basically:
-two pairs of black pants – one is a pair of Betabrand’s dress pants yoga pants that look polished but are so stretchy, and the other is a pair of black cords/jeans. Though I mysteriously can’t find that latter pair, so I basically wore the Betabrand pants for five days in a row last week (those are the ones in the picture).
– 2 black long sleeve shirts. The one in the picture is actually a maternity top from Gap that I’ve been wearing for six years or so. By other long sleeve black shirt is a dolman sleeved cotton shirt from Uniqlo.
-1 black v-neck short sleeve t-shirt. It’s from Pact, though I bought it on super sale at Whole Foods. (tip! Whole Foods sells Pact clothing, and they always seem to be on sale when I see them.) This t-shirt is made of very sturdy, smooth cotton.
-1 black v-neck 3/4 sleeve dress from Wool&. It’s the Willow dress. Super versatile. (Also in the picture, you’ll see I’m wearing my FlipBelt – I wear the Flipbelt backstage with my dress because I need to clip the belt pack of my headset to it.)
-1 sweatshirt blazer. Also a work horse. It looks like a blazer, but feels like a sweatshirt. I’ve gotten lots of complements on it backstage, where it is dark and people can’t tell I’m just wearing a glorified cardigan.
– black leggings – I have 3 or 4 pair of Jockey pocket leggings that I wear all the time, not just for backstage. I love them because they are mostly cotton and have side pockets.
-1 pair of black shoes, Wolky Passion Mary Janes. I feel like I should also get a pair of Chelsea boots or sneakers as well, but these Mary Janes go with everything and are pretty comfortable, so I’m probably fine. I do occasionally wear my running shoes backstage since they are black, but that always feels a little weird.
-I don’t usually wear a hat because then the headset won’t fit on my head, but for some reason on this show, I had a headset that could go over the hat, so I wore my hats backstage. That hat was given to me fourteen years ago by a friend at my bachelorette party.
-For opening nights, I also have a chiffon-y top and skirt that feels a little fancy.
So between those 10 items of black clothing, I manage to get through a whole run of a show. I repeat clothes a lot, but like I said, no one really cares what you’re wearing when you are moving around in the dark backstage. Every so often, I’ll feel uninspired by my black capsule wardrobe and then I remind myself that I don’t actually wear much black when I’m not working, so no point in spending money to expand that part of my wardrobe. When I’m feeling meh about putting on my blacks, I just do it anyway and then I get over it pretty quickly.

Tech snack discovery of the week: One of my go to quick foods to pack during tech is an avocado. I just chuck the whole thing in my bag and then at work, I split it in half and eat it with a spoon. Well, this time, I had also packed these Tamari Soy Sauce Rice Crackers from Trader Joe’s and I thought, “We put avocado on sushi, why not on Tamari Soy Sauce Rice Crackers?” And I used the crackers to scoop out and eat the avocado and it was delicious. Definitely going in my “easy emergency dinner” ideas list.

Tech Steps Stats:
Average Steps/Day: 6913 (Definitely lower than when I am an Assistant Stage Manager since being an ASM requires running around backstage a lot more.)
Average Miles/day: 2.8 miles
Average Floors/Day: 8 floors.

Grateful for – in addition to all the above things that made our week in the theatre so fulfilling:
1) The colleague who recommended me for my supertitle job. I was prepping the translation slides for my next voice recital gig and realizing how much I actually love doing supertitles. This gig wasn’t something I was actively looking for; the organization was looking for a supertitle coordinator and asked my friend if they knew anyone who could do it and he gave them my contact info. I’m so grateful that my friend thought of me.

2) My friend, who sent us a copy of her new cd of music for children. It’s brilliant and I am in awe of her talent. She has one song that she said was inspired by my 11 year old years ago when she must have been 5 or so and asked for a song about being bored. The result was a song called “It’s the End of Your Screentime.” And there is one song that is a riff on “Twinkle Twinkle Little Star” where she talks about stars and the atmosphere and rhymes the phrase “Blue Super Giants” with “I love Science.” I mean how awesome is that? You should check it out! The CD is called Because He Was A Weasel – her website is here. I feel so lucky to know such a smart and witty and thoughtful person.

Looking Forward to:
1) My mother’s coming to visit. She is spending three weeks with us. Yay. I’m hoping I can convince her to make dumpling when while she is here.

2) Hallmark Holiday Movie marathon. The 11 year old’s request. Seems like the perfect way to spend a day since the weather has gotten decidedly chilly.

4) Theatre trips. I’ve booked tickets to see A Year with Frog and Toad for the family – the two little kids LOVE Frog and Toad – and also tickets to see Fiddler on the Roof with my mother. Fiddler on the Roof was her favorite movie, and I thought this was a good Christmas present for her since it wasn’t something that she would have to store or take back to California. I so rarely go to theatre that I’m not working on that to have actually bought tickets seem novel and special.

5) Pants. I was lamenting my lack of pants – I have one pair suitable for winter, not counting the aforementioned black pants for working backstage; I’ve been wearing my linen pants to supplement, but that seems… not seasonally appropriate. When Duluth Trading company had their holiday sales this month, I ordered many many pairs of pants to try on. I don’t love pants, but I’m excited to potentially have more than one pair for cooler weather. One pair I ordered is flannel lined!

What We Ate:

Monday: Kabocha squash curry from Meerah Sodha’s East. East is cookbook I borrow from the library at least twice a year – it has such great and flavorful vegetarian recipes. I should just buy it, I love it so much. (Funny story, I bought this cookbook for a cousin gift exchange a few years ago, I love it so much. Then my meat eating/vegetable hating cousin ended up drawing it. My other kind-hearted cousin graciously stole it from him, saying “I love vegetables!” But to be honest, I don’t know that she actually cooks.) The recipe for the curry floating around online, though.

And that’s the sum total of what I remember from dinners last week. I’m sure the Husband fed the kids quite well. There was a movie night where they watched Candy Cane Lane. I might have made instant pot soup another night, but I can’t remember. One day for lunch, I did make a really tasty Cheesy Kale and Rice Cake bake from Hetty Liu McKinnon’s Tenderheart cookbook. I had rice cakes (the Korean kind that are dense and chewy), and some kale languishing and I just used whatever cheese I had on hand and the result was amazing. The recipe isn’t online, but you can see a picture of it on McKinnon’s IG feed, and, if that is your thing, get the cookbook because there are so many terrific vegetable heavy recipes in there.

So that was the recap of tech/opening/closing week. Clearly I’m past that, but I’m still playing catch up and counting down to the holidays. I’m looking forward to having time to to sit and reflect on my day, rather than collapse in exhaustion when I get home from work at midnight.

Weekly recap + what we ate: Best Laid Plans and a Good Thursday

And now we have turned the corner into December! I have just one show and two recitals and a bit of office work to get through and then I’m off contract until after the new year. Of course that’s still two weeks to get through, and with the holidays bearing down …

I had to work all weekend, but the Husband took the kids to buy a tree and they put it up and decorated it while I was still at work. And not just the tree, but they also put up Christmas lights on our porch and pulled out the decorations for the mantel and top of the piano. Also, an added touch this year, they wrapped coloured lights around the railings to our upper level. We go back and forth as to to coloured lights or white lights on our tree, and this year, the white lights won out.

The Husband also got the kids Advent calendars. These ones had a nativity scene and stickers for each day that you are supposed to add to fill in the picture, ending, of course, with the baby Jesus. The four year old got really excited and did the first three days on day one. We’re going to have to hold her back lest she finishes all the stickers before Jesus is supposed to arrive. I had toyed with the idea of doing this watercolour advent paint along – every day the company releases a new small watercolour tutorial. I really love the idea, but I don’t see it fitting into my day. Or maybe when I’m off ontract, I’ll jump in.

Things that didn’t go according to plan this week – all those appointments for life admin that I had scheduled into the pockets of free time this week. I know things have a better chance of happening when I schedule them, but still… so frustrating when I feel like I finally did some adulting and made appointments and then have to cancel them. The sad: various bodily ailments. I had plans to knock out a bunch of life tasks this week, but plans had to be changed. The appointment for my drivers license renewal that I had booked was waylaid by a vomiting child, and had to be re-scheduled. The same vomiting child woke up two nights later complaining of an ear ache, which turned out to be a double ear infection. So her long awaited appointment at the pediatric dentist was also re-scheduled. (She also woke up in the middle of the night the next evening. No good reason, crying inconsolably. I let her stay up and watch Hallmark holiday movies with me and that seemed to make life better.)

Which, actually was a good thing that I had to cancel the morning dentist appointment because the 11 year old injured her thumb on Monday and couldn’t move it on Thursday. This was concerning because she had a piano recital on Friday. Since I wasn’t taking the youngest to the dentist on Thursday anymore, I could take the oldest to the doctor to look at her thumb. It’s like those puzzles of sliding pieces – move one piece over to create a space and slide another thing it its place. Anyhow, turns out the 11 year old had a minor sprain. “Take three Advil and you’ll be fine,” the pediatrician said. I was somewhat surprised by this advice, but okay. It’s better than having to get an x-ray and an MRI.

Thursday actually turned out to be a lovely full day. Not lovely in that it had any special adventures or big events, but just lovely in that things just flowed. It was my one free day this week, so I wanted to get as much life admin done as I could – I did the school bus drop, then I came home put away the laundry that had been sitting there for days (That the laundry even gets done is thanks entirely to the Husband who washes, dries, and folds mountains of laundry every week.) At 9:45, I picked up the 11 year old from school and took her to the Pediatrician’s appointment for her thumb. Took her back to school. Went home and put away more laundry. Then went back to pick up the 11 year old from school for her passport appointment. Submitted passport application. Hooray! Crossed that off the list and bought stamps for Christmas cards while at the Post Office. (Not that the cards are even started, but that’s one step done.)

Then it was 1:30p and the 11 year old and I decided that she could ditch the last two periods of the day – so we went to get Panda Express (her first time!) and walk through Joann’s Fabrics before heading home. I had work meeting – even though it was my free day from the show, I still had some departmental duties to do. Then once that call was over, the 11 year old and I walked down to pick up the 4 year old from school, which was nice because the 11 year old and I don’t get much time together – a combination of my work schedule this fall and prickly tween. After that, I did the school bus pick up and came home and cooked dinner while the Husband took the 11 year old to buy a dress for her recital.

After dinner, we did something new and fun (okay, so maybe we did have a mini adventure after all…) We had a pajama library excursion. Returning library books and checking out Christmas books was the one thing on my Thursday to do list that I didn’t get to, so I decided that after dinner, the kids would get into their pjs and we would go to the library for an hour. It was actually a nice fun break from routine, and I was glad to give the Husband and hour of alone time since he’s been on single parent duty pretty much since September. (Actually now that I think of it, an hour seems like barely enough for all that he’s done this fall.) I’m definitely putting this on my list of “Winter Weekday Evening Fun” – I think when I’m not working, on the nights that we can finish dinner by 6:30p, a pajama library excursion is very doable.

Thursday planning Post-it. Yes, I plan on a Post-it. I do have a planner, but for some reason, this is what I default to

So Thursday was a very satisfying day. It all felt like a very full day – one in which I didn’t have time to idly scroll my phone and lose half an hour of my life, or think about what to do with my day because there were enough scheduled things to give me structure, but not so many that I couldn’t breathe. I managed to do almost everything on my planning Post-it – it was very satisfying to scratch things off the list.

Pet Peeve of the Week – I adore the Husband for doing all the laundry in the house (except mine – I like to do my own laundry.) (also – he does the laundry even though the 11 year old is perfectly capable of doing it, so props to him) Anyhow – he hauls it down to the laundry room, puts it in the machine, starts the machine, comes back and puts it in the dryer, then he folds it. When I have time, I will put the kids’ clothes out on their bed so that they can put it away before they go to bed. BUT…. one of my pet peeves is that he does not fold the shirts with the design on the front visible. It is very important to the six year old that he wears certain shirts with certain pants. But, if the shirts are all folded with the design on the inside, how will he find the shirt he is looking for? He will take every. single. shirt. out of the drawer, strewing them across the room. What havoc!

Now, I know this chaos is not the Husband’s fault, so really this pet peeve is not directed at him. Anyhow, now when I am laying the folded clothes out for the kids to put away, I will refold all the shirts with the designs facing out. Truth be told, it does not completely alleviate the strewing of the shirts. But I can wish. Also – I use this 2 second method to fold shirts. Changed my life.

Outfit of the week:

I love this sweater vest, but I don’t wear it too much because it is somewhat bulky. But if you look, you’ll see that the front is made up of overlapping panels. I bought this vest right after my youngest was born. The Husband had given me a subscription to Rent the Runway earlier that year because I was feeling a little down about not having any cute clothes that fit. RTR carries maternity and nursing clothes, but I also got really good at looking at non-maternity/nursing clothes and figuring out if I could nurse in them. This sweater vest with it’s overlapping panels felt like it would fit in the “nursing friendly” category. So I added it to my monthly rental and when it arrived, I found that it indeed was perfect for nursing. Anyhow, that was three years ago and I ended up loving the vest so much that I bought it. (I guess this follows the trend set last week with my nursing dress that I still wear).
Continuing on in the vein of “clothes that I bought when pregnant” that little skirt I bought when I was pregnant with my first – it has a wide waist band that you can fold over, which was great for my expanding stomach at the time. At some point, the skirt developed a hole near the hem, but the skirt was so comfy and versatile that I just took scissors and trimmed six inches off it, making it the perfect mini skirt to wear with leggings. (Also that skirt/legging combination is often what I wear when I bike to work, since I can bike easily in it but also if I put on the right top once I get to work, it all looks okay for going to rehearsal, and not like I just biked five miles.) The leggings and shirt are from Duluth Trading Company – their clothes are solid, but a little unexciting, which makes them good for layering. The hat was a gift almost twenty years ago from a colleague whom I worked with. I used to have a red tam that I wore all. the. time. But then I lost it, and my friend bought me this hat because she said I didn’t look like me without a red hat.

This quote made me laugh: from the New York Times’ By The Book section featuring Rick Riordon:

I’ve always found this question a little… I don’t know… snobbish. I read a lot of romance novels, a genre that often is put into the “guilty pleasure” category, and I always feel like that is such a misogynistic take on the genre. What ever is wrong with the world that stories about happily ever after and people finding joy and pleasure in life are considered lesser than a 700 page tome about misery and suffering? Anyhow, I appreciate Riordon’s tongue in cheek point about the guilt one feels from reading should not be from the book itself.

Food discovery: Marmite! I had always heard of marmite and how some people find it awful. Which immediately makes it intriguing to me. So when I saw it at the store last week, I had to buy a jar. I ate it on a buttered crumpet (also one of my recent joys – a hot buttered crumpet for breakfast). My verdict: salty, very salty, umami filled but only palatable in small doses, with a slightly bitter after-taste. My first impression was that it kind of tasted like spreadable beer – and then I googled it and that made sense because it is made of yeast, originally invented as a use for leftover brewer’s yeast. I’ve been reading a few recipes for noodles that involve marmite, and I want to try that too.

Grateful For:
-Flexibility to stay home with a sick child. I don’t really have formal sick leave. The Husband, who works a “normal” white collar job, takes leave to stay home with kids when they are sick, or works from home. I don’t have benefits like that (or at all…) But, I do have understanding colleagues who, when I text in the morning and say, “I need to stay home today because the 4 year old is vomiting. Can you guys cover rehearsal without me?” They always say, “Of course!” Granted, this isn’t something I would feel comfortable doing if it were a tech rehearsal or a performance, but for a regular staging rehearsal – I’m grateful that I can do it.

– the 4 year old, who, after spending her sick day with me, says, as I am packing up to go to work for the evening, “It was nice hanging out with you!” Melted my heart and made staying home with a sick kid and listening to Llama Llama audiobooks in repeat not so thankless a job.

– The kids’ piano teacher for teaching them piano and for having a recital for kids to play. It was the six year old’s first recital. He played Jolly Old St. Nicholas. It wasn’t perfect, but he doggedly kept going. The 11 year old played a piece with lots of notes and chords and arpeggios. Afterwards there were cookies.

-Rehearsal ending early. There were a couple of days when we ended rehearsals really early. One was the Friday of the aforementioned piano recital, and I was able to get to the recital in time. And then another day, the last two hours of rehearsal were cancelled and I then had time to update some paperwork and clean up the markings in my score. Getting those couple of hours back so that I could get ahead with my paperwork was such a gift. I guess this is an example of things not going to plan, but in a good way.

Looking Forward To:
-Tech week! It feels like I just teched a show, and here we are again. I have a free day tomorrow, which is filled with the cancelled appointments from last week, but I’m also going to do some food prep: make boiled eggs, make soup, marinate some beans, stock up on fruits and vegetables and healthy snacks. Maybe make some chai concentrate so I can have a tasty hot beverage in the mornings. I heard about this condensed milk chai based, and I want to try it, though I worry about it being too sweet. I want to plan my outfits for the week as well. I’m always nervous going into tech because so much can go wrong and I feel a lot of pressure to keep things moving. I know some stage managers thrive on the adrenaline of tech, but it honestly, is not my favorite part of the process. Honestly, I’m dragging a little this week and I need to really dig down and remind myself of why I love this little show I’m working on and how lucky I am to work with some very excellent people.

-I have a supertitle gig for another voice recital coming up. I know the pianist and it’s always fun to see people I know play.

-Finding time to read. Right now reading:

Fiction Read – part of mother daughter book club

What We Ate: I cooked! Well, two out of seven meals, but it’s a start.
Monday: Husband cooked, I have no idea what they ate. Maybe eggs?

Tuesday: Sweet Potato and Black Bean tacos from Dinner Illustrated. I actually didn’t cook this, but I did plan and prep everything for the Husband before I went to work.

Wednesday: Mac and Cheese and green beans

Thursday: Bahn Mi Noodle bowls, from this recipe, though I used tofu instead of pork and noodles instead of cauliflower rice. Always a tasty meal.

Friday: First dinner was butternut squash soup I pulled from the freezer. After the piano recital we ordered pizza and watched Spirited. Holiday movie season is not open at our house.

Saturday: Peanut butter toast and yogurt. I had Thanksgiving leftovers after I got home from work.

Sunday: Not sure what the family had, tortellini, I thinn. I ate Tuesday’s sweet potatoes and black beans in a wrap. It was actually supposed to be my lunch, but I had a packed day at work and didn’t eat lunch that day. I actually ate this at the pool while the 11 year old had swim clinic. Usually she carpools to swim clinic with our friends, but this week they were sick so the Husband took her. Then, in order to avoid him sitting with the two other kids until swim clinic was over, I offered to leave work in time to pick the 11 year old up. Okay, the sad thing is that after I ate my wrap, I packed up to go meet the 11 year old as she came out of the dressing rooms, only I didn’t pay attention and I ended up leaving my Tupperware at the pool! Not sure if I’ll ever see it back now. Wump wump.