Month: June 2024

We looked at our calendar and realized that it was going to be one of our only free weekends to take a day trip to Longwood Gardens, so we decided to go on Saturday. The Husband and two littles went to a volunteer garden clean up at the church in the morning and when they came home, we had lunch and then got in the car. We usually go to Longwood Gardens in the morning and spend all day, so this was a bit of an abbreviated trip. I wondered if driving two hours for a couple hours at Longwood would be worth it, and it turns out it was a nice outing. We didn’t go to the conservatory, spending all our time in the outdoor portion of the gardens, and we skipped the treehouses where we usually let the kids play for a bit. But we did walk the meadow path, which is something we don’t always get to do because it is a little on the long side. And we did see the vegetable gardens which is always one of my favorite things. Here is the Rainbow collage from our visit:

One big disappointment was that they have taken out the children’s garden – there used to be a section with a fountain the kids could play in and the gardens were set up with bee themed paths with nooks and crannies to hide in. It was the kind of space that invited a lot of imaginative free play. The Husband talked to a guide and they said that they’re implemented more “interactive” displays for kids – namely little signs with information and prompts for discussion. Which… let’s be honest, I don’t know any kid that is going to say, “Boy, this placard is a lot more fun than these winding maze-paths.” Anyhow, that was kind of a bummer, but even still it was nice to be out in the sunshine and flower and trees and grass. The 12 year old took charge of the two little kids and they wandered down paths together singing show tunes, and when they got tired of that, she would ask for prompts from her siblings and make up songs for them. It’s nice to have moment like that to remember when they are at each other’s throats. We stayed at the gardens for about two and a half hours and then we went home, stopping for BBQ on the way home. It was delicious. All in all, a nice day.

Sunday was Time Trials for the 12 year old’s swim team. I took her to the pool at 7am and then stayed to work as a timer. It was really neat to see her swim and take an interest in her results. She even went up to one of the stroke and turn judges during a quiet moment and asked about the rules and how people most often get disqualified. They weren’t DQing people at time trials, but afterwards, she still went and asked the judge if she would have been DQd so she could learn and work on those things. I think I’m realizing that even though I find parenting a tween really hard, it’s so cool to see her becoming a person and take things on herself. Makes me feel like I just need to trust the process more and talk less.

To celebrate time trials, I took the 12 year old for a smoothie and we tried a Mangonada – kind of a combination of mango smoothie with mango chunks layered with a swirl of sweet and spicy mixture called chamoy, and topped with a tamarind straw. It was amazing and I’ll have more! The rest of the day was occupied by a long visit from a friend who I hadn’t seen in a while and then simple dinner and bed. All in all a nice weekend.

The week before was one of my few weeks without kids and without work. One of the big projects was to clean out the guest room. It has become a dumping ground for all the random things without a home or in transition in our lives. I spent a couple hours this week going through the boxes and boxes of kids’ clothes. It’s kind of a chore because they need to be sorted into stuff the little kids can still wear and stuff that no one will ever wear again. Then this latter pile is sorted into age and then girl and boy clothes. And then there are the shoes. So many shoes. I had a phase when I was obsessed with those Keen water shoes and would snatch them up anytime I saw them at consignment sales. It is kind of a problem. I have a pair in practically every size, and then some. Some sizes that are ridiculous because my kid certainly wasn’t walking when her feet were that size. So there are a lot of shoes. Which is kind of funny because we’re kind of shoe minimalists for the kids. They have a pair of running shoes, a pair of Crocs and a pair of rain/snow boots. And also a pair (or two of Keens).

Also – over the years I’ve also amassed a motley assortment of breast pumps. Breast pumps were never covered in my insurance plan (this feature had been grandfathered in after Obamacare passed), so, counter-intuitively, I decided that I would spend lots of my own money on pumps. I had five electric pumps sitting around. Three of them I love, as much as one can love a breast pump – I mean I think there were days when I spent more time with my breast pump than with my family, so there was a kind of begrudgingly familiar relationship there. Two of the pumps were complete pieces of garbage. They weren’t efficient at all and had so many awkward parts. (I mean all pumps have awkward pumps, but these were particularly not streamlined.) Why was I holding on to crappy breast pumps??? What value were they adding to my life?

To backtrack a little, on the day before, my friend and I went to see an afternoon movie. We went to see Babes – a movie about two friends navigating their friendship as they traverse the waters of motherhood. I can’t remember the last time I laughed so much in a movie theatre. The movie was so so so so funny. But also so on point about so many aspects for friendship and parenthood. There is a moment (spoiler alert) where one character encourages the other character to burn her breast pump. Oh my goodness, the triumphant glee with which they destroyed that breast pump brought me so much joy to watch. The next day, thinking back on the movie, I looked at those two crappy pumps sitting in the bottom of a storage bin and I was inspired. Those pumps were annoying as all get out to use – no point in trying to dispose of them in the perfect way. Chunk, toss. Straight into the garbage bag they went. I felt a tiny twinge of regret about throwing out something that was still in working order, but I’ll get over it.

Two of the other pumps, I ended up giving to a friend with a new baby girl. In addition to that friend, I have another friend (the one who came over on Sunday afternoon) expecting a baby in September, so I passed on a bunch of stuff to her too, including cloth diapers, a diaper pail, a baby sling. Why did I have a diaper pail still sitting around? I wasn’t even using it – it was in the attic, collecting dust and nostalgia.

In all honesty I could have just chucked everything into a donation pile and moved it all out of the house, but every time I pulled the clothes out, I got all sentimental, remembering when the outfit was worn. And when I got sentimental, I couldn’t bear to just sweep everything into a trash bag for donation; some of the pieces I wanted to pass along and know that they would get worn again. So I think that this week, between those two friends, I passed along four or five boxes worth of things – also a baby chair that I think I will need to get back because unbeknownst to me, the Husband is actually really attached to it – it cam all the way from Colorado with us when we had our first child. The guest room does not look any better, though, because most of the things I did purge were in bins, so they didn’t leave much visual clutter in the first place. If anything, the guest room looks worse because the things that were in bins are now all over the floor. Oh well, at least I know that progress is being made, even if it doesn’t look like it.

We’ve been swimming a lot this week. My skin smells constantly of chlorine and sunscreen and no amount of scrubbing will get that smell out. I’m really proud of the 4 year old – one day I forgot her swim vest at home, and she still spent an hour and a half in the pool (with time out for adult swim) – she can now touch the bottom in the shallow end. Neither the seven year old nor the 4 year old can swim yet, but they are comfortable paddling around in the 4ft section in their swim vests. We don’t swim much outside of summer, so every year it’s a bit of a surprise to see how the kids fare in the water. (Though there is a new aquatic center opened up near us, so maybe we’ll take advantage of that during the cooler months?). One of my dreams this summer is to get the 7 year old to swim independently. There were definitely 7 year olds swimming at time trials and their flailing perseverance was kind of adorably inspirational to watch.

We’re still trying to find our routine for pool nights. I’ve been trying to pack a big snack/dinner for the two little kids so they can eat at the pool after their swim session. Then I have them shower and change into pjs at the pool so that when we get home they just have to brush teeth and go to bed. The 12 year old either eats at home or eats at the pool. Sometimes both. The “coming home and going straight to bed” hasn’t been exactly working and there have been a lot of late nights. I don’t know if we just muddle through this erratic bedtime for the next five weeks, or if we should try to tweak the routine/schedule. Oh well, there’s only a couple more days of school and then we’re into summer, so maybe the relaxed evenings are what makes summer memories? Although, once camp starts, our mornings will be more hectic because camp starts earlier than school so we will have to be out the door earlier. My takeaway – there is no such thing as routine.

Towards the end of the week the principal called with the results for the four year old’s Early Entrance to Kindergarten assessment and he said that the 4 year old did not meet the criteria for early entrance. Wump wump. When I asked the principal what they thought she needed a little more time on, he said that she was actually above grade level for Math and letter recognition, but some of the reading skills weren’t quite there. Part of me thinks that if my child can already read, then she should be going into 1st grade, not kindergarten. I do wonder if early entrance to Kindergarten is about a child being highly gifted rather than just run of the mill “ready for kindergarten”. Anyhow, the principal said we can appeal the decision to the school district if we want. The first step would be a more in depth meeting with him.

I know I said I wouldn’t push the early entrance issue if the school thought she should wait, but it’s one of those things when faced with the realities, things always shift slightly. I think we will go ahead and meet with the principal and go from there. I think I also am a little concerned that her current pre-K teachers say she will be bored if she has to repeat pre-K so I want to know what can we/the preschool do to challenge her next year and keep her engaged? Or maybe we need to look into private Kindergarten? The whole thing has left me a little deflated because I had been really excited for her to start school next year – she is the most mature of the three kids, she does addition up to 10 on her fingers, she knows all the letter sounds and can write words if you spell them to her – all her teachers say she’s ready. She had even gotten a place in the same French Immersion program as the 7 year old, which meant that I would have two kids in one school. I’ve never had two kids in one school before! The Immersion program is by lottery, so I’m not sure if she’ll get a place the following year. And now it would mean another year of paying for childcare. Gah. All things that are a little bit of a bummer.

Haiku – I’m trying to take up the haiku habit again. It’s watermelon season, one of my favorite reasons for summer. Only watermelons are big, and not everyone in the family likes eating it….

Why did I ever
Buy a whole watermelon
Right before my trip?

Grateful For:
-My friend who came see a weekday matinee with me and the very flexible week at work that allowed her to do so. Is there anything as luxurious as taking in a weekday matinee? The theatre was practically empty and my friend and I ate popcorn for lunch and laughed loudly together. And afterwards we ran errands at Target together. It was kind of the perfect friend day.

-Laughing with my family. Inspired by a mention on Stephany‘s blog, I cued up some Nate Bargatze. Stand up comedy is not something that was ever really on my radar. But I like laughing, so I thought I’d give it a try and pulled up one of his albums the other day while cleaning the kitchen. Oh my did it feel good to laugh. And the 12 year old, who was cleaning alongside me laughed and laughed and laughed the whole time. We’ve had a lot of moody tween lately, so hearing her laugh kind of helped remind me that she can still find delightful things in life. She now wants to listen to stand up all the time – we listened to Jim Gaffigan on the way to Longwood Gardens. I’m discovering a whole new world of entertainment! I don’t always find the content appropriate – I think what was once considered “edgy” is actually kind of sexist/racist/ableist, etc. And body shaming seemed to be a big thing in a lot of the albums. Some of the punching down is uncomfortable, and not in a good way. So yeah, some of it has been a little hit or miss. But when the absurdities of life are brought front and center and I can relate to those absurdities, it’s kind of a hit.

-Music Teachers. We’ve had two music recitals the past few weeks and, let’s be honest, the enthusiasm outweighs the ability in many cases. And yet, it doesn’t matter at all. The teachers are as enthusiastic for the kid who played the 10 second piece as they are for the kid who played the 10 page piece. My kids’ music teachers spend their time day in and day out teaching kids how to make music and never seem to get jaded about what they do.

-Finding my journals. I lamented last week about feeling a little off because I had misplaced my journals. Well I found them! They were under a pile of things next to my desk. Hooray! I haven’t gotten back into the daily habit, but I did make time to jot a few things down every couple of days. It’s a little sad to me how blank May is, but when I look back, I’ll be able to tell that May 2024 was a very busy month, and that’s a kind of record keeping in and of itself.

Looking Forward To:
– Maine! I’ve been listening to podcasts on Acadia National Park to get inspired. Listening to travel podcasts is one of my favorite things to do when I’m getting ready for a trip. I just search my destination and I’ll get a list of podcast episodes that are relevant. I’m excited for hikes and beaches and lobster and seeing friends.

-On that note, there was a list in the New York Times called Read Your Way Through Maine. It’s part of an occasional series where they have an author recommend a reading list tied to a location. (There was one for San Francisco, which inspired some of my reading during spring break.) I love reading books set in places that I’m about to visit, so I’ve borrowed a couple books off the Maine list to read in anticipation of/while in Maine – Landslide is about a women, mother of three teenage boys living in remote Maine, trying to cope when her husband is hospitalized in a fishing accident. Night of the Living Rez is twelve interconnected short stories set in a Native community in Maine.

-Glee! Because swim team practice goes until 7:30pm, we have had to re-think our traditional Friday night pizza and movie. Similar what we do when the 12 year old had Friday night basketball practice, we’ve decided to replace the pizza and movie with pizza and a tv show. During basketball season we watched Galavant, but there was only two seasons of it and we’ve watched it all. We tossed around a couple idea – I had borrowed the first season of Star Trek: The Next Generation from the library, and we thought we might introduce the kids to the Star Trek universe, but at the last minute I was in the mood for something a little more light hearted, and we decided to watch Glee. I had watched it off and on when it first came out, but I didn’t really have a television at the time, so I didn’t get to watch all of it. We are only two episodes in and it’s really fun. Some awkward adult content that I’m not quite ready to explain to the 7 and 4 year olds yet – I had forgotten the whole bit about the celibacy club – but they haven’t asked yet. The musical numbers are fun and the performances crackle; I’m enjoying it.

What We ate: We’ve survived our first two weeks of swim team practice. Last week the little kids started practice so it was the first week with us being at the pool from 5:00pm – 8:00pm. Dinner kind of felt all over the place.

Saturday: Leftover pizza and Kate and Leopold. It was my turn to choose the movie and I wanted a nice cozy rom-com. Does anyone else remember this movie? What a charming, sweet, perfect romantic comedy! And oh my gosh Hugh Jackman just glows through the whole movie. I feel like I’ve said it before here, but he’s just so pretty.

Sunday: Grilled chicken and vegetables. My friend’s 11 year old and my 12 year old have the same voice teacher, so Sunday after their recital, we asked if they wanted to come over for dinner. We stopped at the grocery story on the way home to pick up some chicken, my friend made a marinade at home and brought it over, and we had a great little cook out – chicken, vegetables, salad. Also – just as we were firing up the grill, our neighbor, who works at the farmer’s market, brought us four bunches of asparagus, so we tossed two bunches on the fire too. It was the perfect casual summer hang out with friends.

Monday: Vegetarian Tortilla Soup. Mostly this recipe from the NY Times, but I made it in the InstantPot and added black beans because we had some dried black beans that had been in the pantry for way too long and we kind of wanted the space back. I think my favorite part of this soup is that I dumped the last crumbs of a bag of tortilla chips into it to thicken it up (a trick I learned from Dinner Illustrated.) The chips had been sitting in the cupboard for a while and they were pretty stale, but no one ever wants to eat the tiny broken bits – how do you scoop salsa with that? I abhor food waste, so dumping the last dregs of the bag into the suit felt very satisfying. Vegan (we didn’t do the cheese and sour cream topping) . Everyone liked this a lot so I’m bookmarking the recipe.

Tuesday: Curry chickpea wraps. Pool dinner. This is the cool bloggers’ favorite curry chickpea salad, which I wrapped in tortillas along with some lettuce and brought to the pool for dinner. I love a curry anything and I even bought some mango chutney as the recipe called for (and then proceeded to eat a quarter of the chutney straight from the jar with a spoon. Was I hungry? Was it just that tasty?) I added a squeeze of lime juice to the salad to brighten it up a little. The little kids didn’t love this, but they still ate a couple bites. The 12 year old and I found this very tasty. Though she did say, “This would be better if you added chicken.”

Wedesday: Asparagus frittata and salad. Made from the other two bunches of asparagus our neighbor brought us.

Thrusday: PB & J and mac and cheese. I brought PB&J to the pool, along with cucumbers and apple slices. It wasn’t filling enough and the kids had mac n cheese (from the blue box) when they came home. Along with brie and Triscuits. I ate the brie smothered in the mango chutney. It was delicious. This is the kind of dinner pre-kids me would have eaten but also would have thought, “This really isn’t dinner.” But you know what? This is totally dinner. Smashing paradigms here.

Friday: Pizza (take out) and Glee

Saturday: BBQ at Old South Smokehouse on the way home from Longwood Gardens. It was our first time trying this place, even though we drive past it every time we go to Longwood Gardens. It was tasty, but there were no collard greens on the menu. What kind of BBQ place doesn’t have collard greens on the menu? Also – we introduced the children to hush puppies. The 7 year old would not share his.
Also – not for dinner, but in the morning I did make a strawberry rhubarb crisp, based on the Smitten Kitchen recipe. I had tried out a new farm stand in hopes of finding a replacement for the one I used to go to which is not opening this season. This new one was on the pricy side for me, of course it’s in our county, which probably affects the price. At any rate, I bought some rhubarb there and some strawberries, with the plan to make a pie. Well, crisp is so much less effort, so I did that instead. Only the kids ate the strawberries before I could make the crisp, so I ended up making it with supermarket strawberries, which was fine, but caused me a disproportionate amount of consternation. The crisp was yummy.
Also – side note – let’s talk about the price of strawberries. So right now, strawberries are in the $3.99/pound to $4.99/pound range at the supermarket. The strawberries at the farmstand were $7.50/pint. Which in comparison to the supermarket felt really expensive. But then as we were all enjoying the pint that I brought home, I realized I pay $8 for a large boba tea, and this pint of strawberries is more filling and is better for me than my boba. And I can share the strawberries with the family. So really, if I’m thinking of how much I pay for a treat (which, let’s face it, Boba – which is kind of my one indulgence – is definitely a treat.), then $7.50 for a pint of strawberries really isn’t so bad. Sometimes when I’m trying to weigh the cost vs. value of something I need to put it into perspective like that to help me decide if it’s something truly worth my money.

Sunday: Pasta and jarred red sauce, cut up veggies, leftover mushroom rice. Typical Sunday – simple supper and eating down the fridge.