Books Read February 2024

I finished a lot more books in February than I usually do, but some of them were pretty slight, in size, not necessarily in subject.

Mad, Bad, and Dangerous to Know by Samira Ahmed – Mother Daughter book club read. I feel like this book was the YA version of Byatt’s Possession- a literary mystery with a twist of romance. I thought there was a lot about this book I wanted to like – the protagonist is an American/French/Indian/Muslim teenager and I love reading that kind of diversity in books, reading about her spending a summer in Paris was pure wish fulfillment for me. But ultimately, I didn’t love the angsty teenage bits. I mean the ex-boyfriend is clearly an asshole, and I got really frustrated that the main character pined for him so much.

The End We Start From by Megan Hunter– short, quick read. This book was recently made into a movie, and I read a movie review, which made the book sound interesting. The book is about a great flood that destroys the world – or maybe just London – and the main character is trying to get to safety with her infant son. The writing is very sparse and poetic, and also rather vague in details, so I kind of always felt like I didn’t quite know what was going on. Even still, a lot of what the main character thinks and feels as she watches her son grow really resonated with me. This passage:
“One day Z finally does it. I have placed him on the bed for three minutes while I put our thing away… He chooses these three minutes, from all the minutes of our life, to master his latest milestone. He flips off the bed and onto the floor, rushing his triumph under a wall of crying, a never-ending hurling of his disappointment at the universe. I am a terrible mother, I thin, nestling his unbroken body into my own. P comes, and O and they tell me no. It happens to everyone.” As someone who has had all three children fall off a bed while an infant, I totally felt this.

and this:
Then we say the secret: there is no skill. There is only another person, smaller than you.” Oh the beautiful precious burden of caring for another being!

What You are Looking For is in the Library by Michiko Aoyama – A slight yet charming book about various people looking for direction in life. The title pretty much sums it up. The book takes place in Japan, and each chapter focusses on one person who wanders into a library. The enigmatic librarian manages to help them pick the perfect book, the book that they needed in that moment in their life. This was a quick and easy read, almost like a fable. As a library lover, I very much enjoyed this book.

Untangled by Lisa Damour – This book has the unfortunate subtitle: “Guiding Teenage Girls through the Seven transitions into Adulthood.” I found this book really useful for framing what it is like to be a teenager and also the parent of a teenager. Damour has a wonderful metaphor about how we are the side of a swimming pool and sometimes our daughters need to cling to us to keep afloat, but they will eventually let go and go back to swimming in the water. Our job is to be here when she gets tired of swimming and needs something to hold on to. I stuck so many sticky notes in this book – things to think about and things to say. I love when parenting books give me specific scripts to use. I thought this book fantastic and has a good blend of science and compassionate steps. It has helped me feel less anxious about bad behavior and actually weigh the bad behavior before I react, and really let it go sometimes. These are my takeaways: be non-judgemental – all kids do stupid stuff; they’re just trying to figure it out. Be available. Believe in your kid.

One quote: “Our daughters have a good reason to point out our limitations: they want us to be better. They will only ever have one set of parents and they are newly aware that we are far from perfect. Ever hopeful, our daughters think we’ll improve if they point out our flaws.” Wow, such an interesting framing – my kid just wants me to be a better parent. I mean we might have different ideas of what a “good” parent, is, but this is such an interesting way to think about the dynamic, especially when it is hard.

Shakespeare was a Woman and Other Heresies by Elizabeth Winkler, read by Eunice Wong– This book was an Audie Award finalist for non-fiction and available from the library right away, so I checked it out. The book grew out of an Atlantic article that the author wrote, of the same name. I think I was expecting something a little more academic than this book turned out to be. Or maybe the scholarship aspects didn’t really come out on the audio version. As it was, the book was more of the author’s personal account of her journey exploring the question of the authorship of Shakespeare’s plays than a scholarly exploration of the topic. I felt myself wanting to know more about how we know what we know and the historical day to days. I didn’t come out feeling like I knew more about Shakespeare than before. Or maybe that is partly the point – how Shakespeare is kind of a great unknown. One thing that did stick with me was the irony that despite writing such well educated and eloquent women, Shakespeare’s daughters were, surprisingly, never educated. This is one of the things that makes people question whether or not Shakespeare wrote the plays.

Funerals are Fatal by Agatha Christie– cozy and convoluted. It had the kind of resolution that was very specific to the situation set up. I guessed before the end whom the murderer was, but not the motive. The motive bit I actually found very satisfying. Not necessarily top shelf classic Christie, but still very entertaining.

Black Ghosts: A Journey Into the Lives of Africans in China by Noo Saro-Wiwa, read by the author – Africans in China was not something I had ever thought about, but I found really fascinating once I started listening to this audiobook. Maybe it’s because I’m the child of immigrants, but I’ve always been interested by stories of migration and what leads a person to take the difficult step of leaving a life behind and moving to another country. Like Shakespeare Is a Woman, Black Ghosts was more memoir than a historical non-fiction book, and I did find myself sometimes wishing for more of the latter. This book follows Saro-Wiwa as she explores the various pockets of African populations in China and contemplates how they came to be, asking people why they came to China and how they have developed the relationships and ties that keep them there. Some of the book feels like it encourages negative stereotypes of both Chinese and African people, and that made me a little uncomfortable, but then I do wonder if that just speaks to a bigger issue of how the African people in China will never be able to integrate fully? Anyhow, I thought this book had some very interesting observations of both Chinese and African culture and how they intersect, or don’t. One thing that stuck with me was the observation she makes, when she talks about why someone would want to live in such a restrictive country as China, about how Chinese people have very little freedom, but the government provides them with a lot of services, whereas in Nigeria the people have a democracy, but no government services.

On my Proverbial Bedside Table:

Daring and the Duke by Sarah MacLean – I’ve been on a bit of a romance novel kick lately and Sarah MacLean writes very good ones.

Wild Genius on the Moors: Still. But ooooh… someone likes Charlotte. There might a wedding in the future.

My Brilliant Friend – I am still reading this. I know Engie’s book club has wrapped up, but I just couldn’t keep up.

Coleman Hill – on audio. A fictional recounting of the author’s family. It centers around two Black families in New Jersey who came from the south in search of better opportunities. Some of it is really sad.

4 thoughts on “Books Read February 2024”

  1. That Untangled book sounds interesting. I won’t read it as those years are behind me, but I always thought it was important to really figure out what was important and what wasn’t, and how to be supportive but also to provide boundaries. Of course, I have boys – girls are another story!

    1. Well, you clearly made it through and everyone thrived, so I think you did okay with your kids!

  2. I don’t know why, but the line “I kind of always felt like I didn’t quite know what was going on” made me laugh. That’s my whole life!! I never know what’s going on ever.

    What You Are Looking for is in the Library sounds very appealing to the book lover in me.

    Oh, yes to finishing My Brilliant Friend! Then go back to those posts and comment and let me know what you think!

  3. I have heard nothing but great things about the Damour book. She has another book about raising teens that I plan to read when my boys are closer to that stage.

    My reading has been kind of meh this year but I can’t really figure out why. I exclusively get books from the library so I am kind of at the whim of my holds list. Right now I am reading ‘family family’ by Laurie Frankel. I am liking it so far but have heard mixed reviews so am going it with kind of lower expectations.

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