New Year – Life Off Headset

(Bi)Weekly Recap + what we ate: The week after Christmas and into a New Year

Well we are into 2023, so here’s a “coffee date” style recap/info dump of what life post Christmas has been like…

The day after Christmas, the Husband bundled us into the car at 6am and we headed on a little overnight getaway. Our first stop was Steamtown, a National Historic Site in Scranton, PA, dedicated to steam locomotives. I had first heard of this place last year when thinking of places where we could use the ten year old’s free National Parks Pass, though it turns out Steamtown is actually free to visit. (The ten year old’s Pass, given to all fourth graders in the country, went sadly underutilized; I have five years to figure out how to make the most of it when the five year old gets his free Parks Pass…). I had thought this historic site might be fun for the train-lovers in the family, but we never made it because Steamtown was in Scranton, PA, four hours away, which made it a little far for a day trip. When we were looking for a quick getaway for after Christmas, though, this seemed like a good option.

Steamtown features a huge collection of steam locomotives. The museum portion of the park, where there were displays on train history and technology, was having some facility issues so it wasn’t open unfortunately, but there was still lots to see. The roundhouse housed many trains and there were park rangers available to answer questions. The ten year old had many many questions for the park rangers. In the outdoor portion of the Roundhouse, there was a locomotive that we could climb into and even ring it’s bell.

After Steamtown we spent the night in Consohoken, where we visited the Edwards Freeman Nut Company – a shop with aisles and aisles of nuts, dried fruit and all the candy and chocolate one can imagine. There were wine gums (yay!), and four different types of black licorice, and dried peaches, and an impressive assortment of chocolate malt balls – dark, milk, mocha, mint… We came away with a lot of treats and snacks. Each kid was allowed to also pick some candy- the ten year old picked out a giant bag of Double Bubble and some Bazooka flavored soda, this latter which the kids all tasted and decided was not very good. But it’s good to try things. The five year old picked out a pack of Skittles – but it was Smoothie flavore Skittles, so quite a novelty. The three year old picked out a Kinder Joy and some Chocolate Pretzels.

Then we had dinner at a local restaurant – chosen because the website offered, “Burgers! Tacos! Sushi!” Though they didn’t serve sushi on Mondays so we had really tasty burgers and Tacos instead. Then off to the hotel, which is always a high point for the kids. They are always super content just to sprawl in a hotel room and watch TV and go to the pool and eat those waffles from the hotel breakfast bar. The pool, unfortunately was not working, but we were all exhausted so sprawling and watching tv seemed like a pretty good option. Eventually everyone went to bed, except the three year old, who proceeded to try to interact with the sleeping people in the room, so I took her out for a little stroll around the hotel. We rode the elevator, checked out the lobby and walked up and down the hallways. At one point, she started singing, “I’m never going to be sleepy.” Over and over and over.

She did eventually go to sleep and the next day, I got a run in while the Husband took care of getting the kids hotel breakfast. After I got back, we packed up the room and went to Longwood Gardens. The gardens still had their Christmas display up, and I enjoyed seeing all the festive decorations. The conservatory was an explosion of Poinsettias. My favorite thing, was a fascinating picture of a poinsettia in the wild. They are actually trees and grow to be eight feet tall, looking nothing at all like the plants we get at Christmas. Also – I didn’t realize this, but the red/pink/white parts of the poinsettia are actually the leaves. The flowers are the small yellow buds in the middle – which makes sense when I actually looked closely at a flower, but I had never really thought about it that way before. It’s always really fascinating to learn about something that seems so every day and familiar.

This one was for the birds – there are bird seeds in the gourds.

We also took in the train display and wandered all over the grounds. (Okay, side note re: trains – apparently trains are a huge deal in the Fire Departments around Baltimore and almost all of them have train displays. And there is a very nice person/group that collects all the places that have holiday train displays and posts them on a website which I must now bookmark for future use.) There is something beautiful and barren about gardens in the winter. Sure, the conventionally beautiful time of the year to see the garden is in the Spring and Summer, but I love how in winter when things are brown and sparse, I can really see the shape of things – the pointy and specific spikes of grass and tree and branches.

I know Longwood Gardens has a spectacular light exhibit, but we’ve never stayed late enough to see it. We’re usually on the road at 4pm so that we can be home in time for dinner. Every year, as we are leaving, we tell ourselves that we will make it out to see the lights one year. This year, the lights were starting to come on as we headed for the exit gate, and I dragged our family down one walk so that we could see some of the lights before we left and it was indeed very pretty.

A gorgeous book end to our trip – when we left the house on Monday at 6am, the sky was dark, except for the single strip of sunrise. And on our way home at 5pm, I noticed that the sky again was gorgeous with a neon orange strip of sunset. I love the contrast:

The rest of 2022was pretty low key, but surprisingly social. The baby went to daycare, but the two school kids were home, so I planned some playdates for the kids. One night we had the neighbors over for dinner, a pleasant evening which made me vow to invite people over for dinner more. We had chili for dinner – simple to make ahead and easy to customize.

The Husband ended up having half a day off on Friday before New Years, so we went to lunch at our favorite dumpling house, then went to Lake Needwood for a walk and some playground time. The weather was pretty mild, but the lake had frozen earlier in the week and there were still pretty ice patterns to be seen. I had been to this trail before, but didn’t realize there was a playground with one of those zipline type structures on it. The kids had a great time. I even took a turn or two. The five year old, who initially balked at the idea of going to this park said, when it was time to go, “I didn’t have enough outdoor time!” Which is always something that I love to hear from my kids. So we went to the same park again two days later, this time I suggested it as a meet up location for my mom’s group, which had been trying to get together for a while. I had met these kids when the three year old was born and it was fun to see how our little squishy babies have all grown. Of course, with ten kids running around, I didn’t really get to chat at length with too many other parents, but I guess that’s what happy hour is for.

In between, trips to Lake Needwood, was New Years Day. It was pretty quiet. new years eve we went to church then came home, had dinner and watched the ball drop in Times Square. Actually the Husband and the ten year old watched. The five year old, three year old and I fell asleep on the couch.

New Years Day was nice and low key. We went to Taiwanese Breakfast, and had bowls of warm soy milk – savory for the grown ups, sweet for the kids – with fired dough sticks (you tiao), and dumplings and noodles and egg pancakes. Then we went to the park for a few hours, skipping lunch because we were so full from breakfast. After we got home, I decided that I needed to do one house project so cleaned out the fridge. I’m a little embarrassed by some of the things in the back of the fridge – there were three containers of sourdough starter, all sorts of pickles and more “mystery” containers than I care to admit. The trash was very full by the end of all this. I won’t pretend out fridge is absolutely uncluttered now, but I have started to be more mindful about where things are in the fridge. For example, all the pickles and fermentation experiments will go on the top right shelf. Leftovers on the left. So when I’m madly looking for leftovers to take for lunch, I’ll know where to look.

In a fun bit of “use it up”ness, I found some garlic butter from one of the Husband’s pizza nights. There was also a container of butter and Worcestershire sauce mixed together, leftover from a failed Chex mix attempt. I combined the garlic butter and the Chex mix butter and made more Chex mix. It was a very successful batch of Chex Mix, and very satisfying to finish up the various butters and *not* put containers back into the fridge.

We also had a very “use it up”ness dinner, which was so satisfying, and then we played Kings of Tokyo before bedtime. So it wasn’t a New Year’s day with grand plans, but there was a good mix of tasty food, family outdoor time, house project time, and family evening. Which was actually, upon reflection, a very good ordinary day.

Then it was back to life. I have to admit, I was so glad when everyone went back to school on January 3rd. I love my kids, but having them gone also felt amazing. It took me a few days to get back into the swing of life on my own terms. The first day they were back at school, I wanted to go for a run, so I parked at a trail after doing the bus drop off. Then it started to rain. And I was so unused to having my time dictated by only myself, I didn’t know what to do. My brain was stuck in, “This is your time to run.” but it was raining out so I clearly couldn’t. (or I could, but I don’t really have the right rain gear to run in the rain right now.) I ended up sitting in my car for ninety minutes before I decided to go to the library and pick up some holds and wait for the rain to subside. The rain did subside and I left the library with some good books. And I did go for that run after all. But man, that first instance of blank, unscheduled time was… not well spent.

Grateful for:
– 2022. Another year in the books. I’m glad I got to see the end of it.
-2023. Another year to live. I’m glad I have the chance.
– The other mom, L, at the bus stop. I was late for school bus pick up twice this week. Twice. The bus has been arriving about thirty minutes earlier and I just mentally wasn’t prepared for it. You’d think I’d figure it out after the first time I was late, but I was late the next day too. There is nothing that combines mortification and fear for your child like being late for the school bus. L was there and texted to make sure I was on my way and sat with my kids until I arrived. So grateful for her.
– Another mom at my bus stop, A. We’ve been chatting at the bus stop for a while now and before the winter break, I said, “One of these days, we should just walk down to the cafe and have coffee rather than just chatting here in the middle of the street.” Well last week, I had a package to return at Whole Foods, and I asked if she wanted to walk down with me, and she said yes, and it was a lovely morning.
-YouTube. Yes, I find a lot of YouTube insidious, but last week, I was reading the book “The Oboe Goes Boom Boom Boom” to the kids. It’s a book all about children in a band. At the end of the book, the author’s note revealed that all the kids in the book was based on real musicians, most of which I hadn’t heard of. So I was able to pop on YouTube and pull up videos of these really obscure yet talented musicians, including Jazz trumpeter Valadia Snow, flautist (and Jethro Tull member) Ian Anderson, Oboe player and composer Ruth Widdy Gibbs, and so many more. I love picture books about music, and it’s always so much more tangible when we can hear it too.
– The Husband for driving on all our road trips. I don’t like driving. I suspect the Husband doesn’t like me driving either. At the same time, I know that driving can be tedious and tiring, so I’m glad that he takes the wheel when we go places.

Looking forward to:
– Going back to work. It’s just a short gig, two weeks. I’m almost done the first week and it’s been nice to be back at work.
– The ten year old’s birthday party. “Looking forward to” might be too strong a way to phrase it, but I’m certainly excited for her to have a party.
-My father coming to visit. He’s here for the kids’ birthday.
– Having time to sit and plan and think about the year. Maybe not this week or next week, but soon…

What We Ate:
Monday: Road Trip – we had dinner at Guppy’s Good Time. The tag line is Burgers, Tacos, Sushi. Unfortunately they don’t serve sushi on Mondays, but the tacos were tasty, as were the cauliflower bites.

Tuesday: Indian Take Out, picked up on our way back home.

Wednesday: Breakfast for Dinner. Waffles and Eggs.

Thursday: Vegetarian Chili from The Weekday Vegetarians.

Friday: Pizza take out and Hip Hop Nutcracker and The Bad Bunch.

Saturday: Yaki Udon noodles with tofu. A recipe from Mark Bittman’s Dinner For Everyone. This cookbook is great because it gives you three variations on each recipe – one fast (under 30 mins), one vegan, and one super fancy (aka time consuming.) We did the “fast” version. Also – life lesson: everything looks better sprinkled with sesame seeds and green onions:

The Husband always says when I’m unsure about a meal, I sprinkle it with sesame seeds and green onions. But I actually think this meal is pretty tasty.

Sunday: Fridge leftovers – used up the lamb from Christmas – part of it I made into sandwiches, some of it I chopped up and threw into the leftover Indian food from Monday. It was so satisfying to use up little bits of food that way.

Monday: Dumplings and green beans. Standard “We don’t want to cook” dinner.

Tuesday: Lentil Soup, loosely based on a recipe from The Weekday Vegetarian. I didn’t have chard, but I used some leftover cabbage that I had in the fridge. I also made zatar flatbread to go with it – pizza dough, flattened and sprinkled with olive oil, garlic powder and za’tar and then baked – the taste to effort ratio is really high on that one.

Wednesday: Brussel Sprout Fried Rice – Meera Sodha’s Nasi Goreng. (vegan) This is the dish that makes the family groan when I mention it’s for dinner, but then everyone devours. I also threw in the last bits of the cabbage and it felt really satisfying to use it all up.

Thursday: Corn and Tomato Pasta from The Weekday Vegetarian. The recipe calls for fresh corn and tomatoes, none of which I had on hand, but I thought this was pretty tasty using frozen corn and canned tomatoes. I think the secret is that the recipe starts with caramelizing a whole red onion.

Friday: Baked Teriyaki Tofu with Broccoli Mushroom Stirfry. (vegan)

Weekly recap + what we ate – Good Bye 2020!

Scene from a Winter Walk at the Arboretum.

It’s been a pretty low key week. There was no school, but the Husband worked Monday and Tuesday, and then took the rest of the week off. There was lots of Zooming with friends and family, and lots of family tussles as our energy periodically outgrew the confines of the house. I wanted to make sure to spend lots of time outside, too, and we did manage to go outside for a little bit every day, with some more extended outings. Aside from that, we slowly put our lives back together from the explosion of wrapping paper and toys that was Christmas.

One highlight was the book exchange I had organized with my mom’s group for the holidays. Over the weekend we had our book reveal. I’m actually quite proud of myself for putting the whole thing together. I created a survey online for participants to talk about their tastes in books, and then used a website to draw names Secret Santa style and everyone got someone to whom to send a book. There was also an option to have a book sent to your baby if you didn’t want a book for yourself. The online survey was really fun to put together – I based it on the format the Modern Mrs. Darcy uses for her podcast What Should I Read Next: participants list three books they love, one book they hate, what they are reading now and what they want more of in their reading life. (For the record – my responses were: Jane Eyre, The Great Believers, Between the Desert and the Sea// Gone Girl // Disability Visibility and Bless Me, Ultima// I don’t think I filled out the last question…). A couple days after Christmas we had a Zoom call where we revealed what books we received and talked about reading and books and life. I really liked having the time to talk about something not just our kids and hopefully we can make book discussion a regular thing. I’m thinking not a book club per se, because I think having to read a specific book can seem burdensome – but rather a time to gather to talk about what we are reading and swap book suggestions.

Monday I threw some frisbees in the car and took the children to a disc golf course in the next county. I know nothing about disc golf, but it sounded like a fun activity and as the weather was quite warm, it was a good excuse to explore a new place. I didn’t realize that there are actually special sized frisbees for disc golf, and rules and what not. At any rate, the field was so muddy from rain the previous day that after a few muddy tosses – including having to climb inside a tree to retrieve our frisbee – we quickly abandoned our attempts to play, opting instead for the playground across the parking lot. We ended up being at the playground for almost three hours. I had brought hot chocolate – my usual bribe when the kids are reluctant for an outing. There is something that feels so special about sipping piping hot hot chocolate outside on a (mildly) cold day.

This week I also took the baby to her 15 month check up. She growing and thriving. The pediatrician had some concerns about her lack of words and called in a referral for her to be assessed by the County’s Infants and Toddlers program. Honestly I am not too concerned as the other kids were also late talkers. Our second child received services from Infants and Toddlers when he was two years old, after we had declined services at 18 months. The baby understands us, follows directions and seems very capable. We will probably go ahead with the assessment, but I’m on the fence as to whether or not to actually commit to services. It is a bit of a time commitment for something that I’m not terribly worried about.

One day we went for a walk at the Arboretum. I had, surprisingly, only been once before and it was when the azaleas were in bloom. Winter seems hardly peak arboretum season, but there was actually a fascinating array of things to see. We explored the conifer collection – comparing and contrasting the wide variety of evergreens. Much of the collection had been donated from a private collection in New Jersey. It’s funny – when I think of collecting, I think of stamps and knick knacks. I never thought conifers were something a person would collect. But here was a wide swath of land that proved otherwise. Particularly interesting was reading all the tree tags on which it was documented where the tree was from and when it came into the collection. I was particularly struck by the wide variety of cypress trees.

There was also sweeping river vistas to take in, winter camellias lending a shock of color to the surroundings, bare trees reaching their finger like branches to the blue blue skies. These dormant trees, with their buds coiled tightly waiting for warmer weather, deceptively quiet, when really they are busy getting ready for spring. As I wandered among these sleepers, I wondered how they will bloom and unfurl come spring and resolved to come back in a few months to see.

On New Years Eve, we played Ticket to Ride, ate some cake and then watched some tv as we waited for the ball to drop in Times Square. It was the eight year old’s first time playing Ticket to Ride and I hope we get to play some more as I quite enjoy that game. It’s the kind of game where you can be as competitive as you like, but there is also great satisfaction in just building really elegant train routes.

The Husband went to bed before the actual stroke of midnight. Just in time for the baby to wake up. I had been dozing on and off on the couch as the kids watched various tv shows and cartoon. Once the baby was up, though, I roused myself and watched the ball drop with all the kids cuddled on the couch. I know that there wasn’t a large crowd in Times Square as there usually was, but it was actually quite hard to tell how small the gathering was from the twenty minutes that I saw.

Anyhow, the baby rang in the new year by not sleeping, and so did I.

I know a lot of people are happy to see 2020 in their rear view mirrors, but I don’t know if I can dismiss it with similar vehemence. So many people suffered enormous losses this year – of loved ones, of incomes, of homes, of peace of mind- that all the dumpster fires analogies seem inadequate. In comparison, I definitely am so very fortunate that we came through the year with many reminders of how lucky we are. I mean distance learning has been difficult and being unemployed has been tough. I really miss my work and my colleagues. There are days when I just want to scream and scream and scream from the frustration of parenting. I miss having an identity beyond harried suburban mother. I miss libraries and museums. I miss playdates and grown up dinner parties.

But….
-my mom got to stay with us for four months (plus the two months she was with us at the end of 2019). And having that kind of support with the children and getting to hang out with her was such a gift.
– the Husband got to work from home.
– after an initial snafu, I was able to successfully file for unemployment. I know that a lot of my colleagues had a much harder time getting their government assistance sorted out so I’m glad I had good records and was able to submit the needed paperwork with little difficulty. Then, even after my initial benefits ran out, there was additional emergency assistance that has helped us. Unemployment benefits is in many ways an imperfect system, but I am so grateful for its existence this year.
– we saved a ton of money on child care.
– we discovered so many great outdoor places. I took the kids hiking by myself and no one fell off a cliff or got eaten by bears.
– I read a ton of books.
– I started figuring out my sewing machine. It is a rickety ancient machine, but it has been a workhorse, helping me crank out over 200 masks so far. And a pair of lounge pants for the three year old.
– Before the world shut down, I was working on a really beautiful opera that I hope we will get to bring to audiences when this is all over.
– My mom’s group is managing to stay connected and supportive of each other.
– I got to see my friend Kristen every single week almost. And we agree that our 40s are so much better than our 20s or 30s.
– I took a drawing class and learned so much about how to see the world and put it on paper.
-I started this blog.

Fun things this week:

My parents had sent us some oranges from their tree in California. It was supposed to have arrived the week before Christmas, but it finally showed up on New Year’s Eve. I keep reading about how the mail has been quite delayed this holiday season what with an increase volume due to COVID. My hat is off to postal workers everywhere; it can’t have been an easy year let alone to say nothing of December. I had been concerned that the oranges would be a soggy moldy mess, but they were actually in great condition! I’m sure that despite whatever delays there was with the postal service, the mail was being kept in a cool dry place.

It was my birthday this week. Something that I try to forget about, but which those around me like to remind me of. Which probably makes me sound ungrateful, I realize. Maybe it’s the reminder of the inevitability of time marching forward? Anyhow, I used the day as an excuse to bake a cake. I made a Tres Leches cake from a recipe in our parish cookbook. I was initially drawn to the recipe because it called for evaporated milk. We had an incident a while back where instead of buying the sweetened condensed milk that I needed for Key Lime Pie, the Husband kept buying evaporated milk. Like three or four separate times. So we had several cans of it in the basement. Tres Leches cake calls for milk in many forms – and it was quite delicious.

We’ve started using the whiteboard function on Zoom to play Pictionary while on video calls. It’s been quite a hit. Sometimes I find it hard to make conversation on video chat – I guess I find it easier to talk to people in person. Pictionary has been fun because it’s an activity that we can all participate in and helps lessen the burden of having to make conversations. Also I like that it allows the kids to draw and play on the screen, but is so much more interactive than them just playing with the filters (which, quite frankly, annoys me).

I had made these door hangers last spring to use while pumping at work. Well we all know how much use I got out of them. So this week, when the Husband relocated his work from home set up to a room with a door, I repurposed on my door hangers for him:

I finally got around to playing Mario Kart, which the Husband purchased as a family present this Christmas. I am somewhat abashed to say that the three year old beat me the first two times I played. Perhaps I have some resolutions to make for 2021 afterall.

Mario Kart and matching pjs- How we spent the Winter Break.

What We Ate:
I didn’t really meal plan this week. Plus a snafu with our Hungry Harvest Box led to no box this week. I hadn’t realized how much of my meal plannings was based on what came in our box. So it was a rather scrounge about week.

Saturday: Homemade pizza + The Happiest Season. This was our first attempt at pizza in our new oven. I used both our pizza stone and our baking steel – a luxury of having two ovens. Homemade pizza is so much better than regular store bought! I found some pineapple and anchovies in the fridge and also a can of olives so I threw those on one of the pizzas and was in umami heaven. One of the pizzas I tried to make on the pizza peel and the dough stuck, so I rolled the dough with the toppings into a log and we had a pizza roll instead. It was actually a fortuitous discovery as it made a version of pizza that was very portable and less messy than an open faced version.

Sunday: Smoked Salmon and English Muffins. I used this recipe from the Washington Post for the English muffins. I liked this recipe a little better than the one with sourdough that I had tried last week – these muffins came out with beautiful nooks and crannies, and the whole wheat flour made for a hardy taste.

Monday: Dumplings and brussel sprouts with noodles.

Tuesday: Tofu Banh Mi Bowls. From this recipe, but with baked crumbled tofu instead of ground pork. And soy sauce instead of coconut aminos. Part of my resolve to plane one vegan grain bowl for dinner a week.

Wednesday: Pasta with jarred marinara and garlic bread.

Thursday: Vegetarian Chili and jalapeno cornbread. The Husband cooked. We are trying to eat less red meat and the thought of turkey chili seemed…. not quite what we wanted. So I suggested we ditch the meat altogether and just make a vegetarian chili. The Husband found a recipe that called for black beans, cannellini beans, sweet potatoes and corn. We also had some chili base in the freezer from a previous chili making effort, when we had made too much of the tomato-y part. All in all a good meal to use things up. Though we have a lot left over so maybe there was ultimately zero gain in freezer space.

Friday: Homemade pizza and Cars II (It was the three year old’s turn to pick). I didn’t see much of the movie because I had misread the pizza dough directions and didn’t realize that it needed two rises. So I was still making pizza when the movie started. But on the other hand the pizza turned out well.