Recap and Menu – Page 14 – Life Off Headset

Weekly Recap + what we ate

I spent the weekend swapping the baby’s 6 month clothes out for 12 month clothes. The nine month clothes still fit. She grows so fast! Most of the 12 month clothes we had were “boy” clothes, left over from the 3 year old. Much as I say it’s ok for her to wear boy clothes, I do love seeing her wear something pretty once in a while. Luckily another mom from my mom’s group was passing along two big bags of 12 month clothes. So I passed along a good chunk of our 12 month boy clothes to yet another mom in my mom’s group. (All this handing down of baby clothes reminds me of the section in Adam Minter’s book where he talks about how very little baby clothes actually make it to third world countries, where a lot of our donated clothing ends up. Baby clothes tend to get very little wear, so they are passed along among friends or resold here in America.)

Fall has settled in. I booked some family photos, and used this handy peak foliage map to decide on a date that would have good fall colour. Now I’m obsessed with trying to decide what we will all wear.

We’ve been playing Uno on Sunday nights. The three year old manages to play a proper card once in a while. It’s adorable because he likes to yell “Uno!” every time he drops a card in the pile, even though he has a hoard of cards still sitting in front of him. Last week, the husband also made hot chocolate to go with our Uno game. It was what you see in the dictionary under “cozy.”

My parents sent us a care package this week. Yay for getting mail! In the box was a 100 pack of face masks – the high quality kind from Taiwan. Apparently the masks from Taiwan are really difficult to procure. There might have been an email chain last week from my cousin, on behalf of my aunt who had access to a shipment from Taiwan. It would involve a pick up location in a parking lot.

Also in the package were three dragon fruits from my parent’s tree. The baby and the three year old love dragon fruit. The eight year old will eat it if I freeze it. I love the vivid pink colour of the skin. It sort of belies the mellow, almost bland flavour of the flesh inside.

On Thursday, I took the baby down to the Reach for my weekly happy hour with my friend Kristen. Despite working literally across the plaza, I had not been to the Reach. It was a little surreal to be at the Kennedy Center and see it all closed up and quiet.

The Husband moved the drafting table into the sunroom, and I’ve been very much enjoying the soft light and sense of place of having a drawing nook. This week’s homework was about drawing negative space – the areas that make up the emptiness around an object. The idea that an object is not defined just by its own shape, but also about the shapes it creates in space. For me, it was the kind of assignment where once I recognized the concept and started thinking about it, I started looking for negative space in the world around me.

Cute things the three year old says:
“You never know where your dragon is.”
“But it’s so bouncy!” Said in response to our admoniation that he shouldn’t be rough with the baby’s head.
“Is that squishy food?” Asking about everything and if the answer is “Yes”, he will try to feed it to the baby.

It’s crazy to think, but eighteen months ago, the three year old was still nursing to sleep and didn’t really speak. He was actually about to start working with a speech therapist to address the speech delay. And now, I read him chapters from my books to put him to bed (last month it was Bury My Heart at Wounded Knee), and he is using words like “organize”. I’m on my college’s alumni listserv for parents, and one thing the wise parent there always say is “This too shall pass.” It is often used as a mantra for challenging times, but I think it is also a beautiful reminder to capture and savour all the fleeting moments of growing children.

What We Ate:

Saturday: Butter chicken – leftover sauce from our last time making butter chicken. Also, thanks to the Instant Pot I was able to cook the chicken from frozen. I don’t know that the InstantPot makes food taste better than otherwise, but it sure is convenient.

Sunday: Pita, Tzatziki, and Cucumbers. Our neighbor gave use a containter of Tzatizki from the famer’s market. She had lived in Turkey once and said this was pretty authentic stuff. Either way, it was pretty tasty. I made flatbread to go with it – this recipe, with half whole wheat flour. And I used the tortilla press!

Monday: Macaroni and Cheese from Dinner Illustrated. Easy one pot recipe that has chard (we used kale) mixed in. Really creamy and tasty.

Tuesday: Husband called an audible and we got Greek take out.

Wednesday: Braised Cod with Peppers. Sounds fancy, but actually really easy and tasty.

Thursday: Another audible because it was dance night and the meal I had planned was not condusive to making ahead. oops. We got wings from a new place.

Friday: Pizza while watching Fireman Sam and Stinky and Dirty. It was the three year old’s turn to pick the movie (clearly). We watched the original Fireman Sam, a British stop motion animation version that premiered in 1987. There was something very soothing about the muted tone of it – both in the visuals and the energy.

Weekly Recap + what we ate

Last weekend the eight year old had first Communion, and so we all dressed up and went to church for the first time in half a year. There was a limit on how many guests each family could bring – which we maxed out just by bringing the other kids. Each family had their own pew and every other row was empty. Everyone was masked. The eight year old was asked to do the first reading, and she did great!

I’m not the Catholic one in the family, but I’ve always found going to church soothing. The getting dressed up, the communal singing (which is now not allowed), and the contemplation. Our church is on the liberal side of things, and I find the homilies are often meditations on how to be more mindful about your actions and reactions. Though these days the two little kids don’t really sit still, so maybe not so soothing and experience in real life.

Afterwards the eight year old got to chose lunch, and she chose Indian take out. We ordered chaat papari, though I was a little nervous that it was going to be soggy, but surprisingly they bundled the yogurt and tamarind sauce separately. Even more bonus, there was more than enough, so now we have extra tamarind sauce in the fridge. Yum!

Monday was a day off from school, so the Husband took the day as well and we went to Longwood Gardens. In pre COVID times we would often go as a weekend trip; we’d book a hotel with a pool, and maybe also go to the Please Touch Museum. This time we took it as a day trip – leaving around 8:30a and getting home just after 6pm.

It was definitely a good trip. We enjoyed fall colour. I like seeing what vegetables they are growing in their gardens. And consequently annoying the Husband when I ask, “Why can’t we grow those?” We saw a frog in the lily pad garden. The chrysanthemums were prepped for planting. The chrysanthemum show is always breathtaking there. I’m not sure if we will get back this year for it, though. And trees. We spent lots of time among the trees.

One thing I’ve resolved to do this year was to take more pictures with the Husband. One of my mentors from my early stage management days sends these wonderful holiday cards and there are always great pictures of her and husband together, huge smiles on their faces. It makes me so happy and inspired to see them. Last year, I realized that I don’t have many pictures with the Husband, the way Mary does. I’m always so busy taking pictures of the kids, with the kids, or of random lovely things in my life. Or of the area I parked in. But no pictures of me and the Husband who is in a lot of ways the most important relationship. So this year, I’ve been handing the phone to the eight year old more often and asking her to take pictures of her parents. She’s taken some good ones and I love that I have them now. The three year old, on the other hand, is decidedly not quite up for the task:

Anyhow, it was good to get out of the house and be outdoors. Longwood is always beautiful, regardless of the season.

Some random thoughts from this week:

I am a terrible decision maker. I contemplate and ruminate and pro and con and go back and forth. This week, I came across something in Carolyn Hax’s column (second letter here) that really was eye-opening for me. The advice Hax writes is so clear eyed and wise and I really love reading her column and her live chats. She wrote, to a letter writing contemplating two career options: “When careful research shows neither option is clearly superior, that could be the definition of a tough decision — or the opposite. If neither is clearly right, then neither’s clearly wrong.” I have terrible FOBO when it comes to decision making; there is something freeing in this realization that if there is no perfect decision, then there is really no wrong decision either. I’ve been reframing some things lately – rather than saying, “There is no perfect solution here.” I’ve been saying, “There is no wrong solution here.” And it helps me move on a little sooner. I still obsess. But maybe with a little less anxiety and a little more grace.

Election season is ramping up. Last week was certainly one for the history books. We watched the presidential debates, which one commentator called “The worst debates ever”. It was really disheartening. And then the President tested positive for COVID. What a crazy week for the news cycle.

Every Wednesday, after piano lessons, we get breakfast sandwiches from Mr. Jay. The eight year old is in charge of calling in the order. Well two weeks ago when I went to pick up sandwiches, I had mentioned that it was the baby’s first birthday. This week, when I went to pick up the sandwiches, he gave us a present for her. It was so touching.

Loving this single little curl at the nape of the baby’s neck. I want to bottle it and keep it forever!

This week’s drawing class homework was to draw and area of the house over several days, layering one day upon the other. I chose our living room sofa. Each class begins with us all sharing our work, and I loved how this assignment seemed to really encapsulate pandemic living. One of my fellow students did a lovely piece of the front door with the coming and going of Amazon packages.

The assignment was inspired by a project that Joan Linder did where she drew her kitchen sink over a number of weeks. Exploring Linder’s work, I came across this series she did of baby gear, and I found it quite inspiring, the art and lines that she found in these things that are so utilitarian.

What We Ate:

Saturday: I’m not sure we had dinner. I think we were full from the Indian food at lunch. Maybe we had sandwiches?

Sunday: Cilantro Chicken with Tortillas and cabbage slaw. The recipe for the chicken came from our church cookbook, and it was basically cilantro, onions, spices, garlic whizzed together in a blender and poured over chicken. The original called for the chicken to be baked with the sauce, but given that our oven was broken, I stuck it all in the Instant Pot and it was tasty. This was also our first attempt to make corn tortillas with the tortilla press that I had ordered and it was easy and fun and really delicious.

Monday: Wendy’s on the way home from Longwood Gardens. Haven’t had this in a long time, and I have to say, one of the foods I miss most during quarantine is french fries.

Tuesday: Spinach Orzo with Pork Chops. The Husband cooked.

Wednesday: Sweet Potatoe Chicken Curry from Dinner Illustrated. We have an overabundance of sweet potatoes.

Thursday: Ratatouille. To use up some peppers and zucchini.

Friday: Pizza and Bride and Prejudice. Fun take on Jane Austen’s classic.

Weekly Recap + What we ate

We celebrated the baby’s birthday last week. with a chocolate cake. All three children have had chocolate cake on their first birthday – does that make it a family tradition? The cake did not go over terribly well with her. She had gotten her shots earlier in the day, and perhaps that contributed to her great fussiness. She was not having it with the cake and eventually rage smashed it, while refusing to eat any of it. Oh well. More for me.

We also went to the Supreme Court to pay our respects to Justice Ginsburg. I almost didn’t go because the whole prospect of taking the metro down and standing in a crowd seemed perhaps not prudent. But ultimately, I decided that these things could be done safely with masks and hand sanitizer, and that saying goodbye to a lady who spent her whole life championing gender equality was something that I wanted to be part of, and something that I wanted my daughters to be a part of.

Last week was also the second week of my drawing class. We talked about how in drawing you have to learn to draw what you see and not the actual object. So you draw lines and angles and not plants and flowers. Learning how to breakdown drawing into concrete steps has been really helpful; it’s shaping up to be a good brain excercise. The Husband had to go into work a couple days last week, one day being class day. I managed the lunch chaos while “attending” class, with my camera off. Being able to take a class while keeping track of my kids certainly opens up all sorts of possibilities.

The “This is Motherhood” moment of the week: wiping the three year old’s behind with one hand while using the other hand to keep the baby from sticking her hand in the (yet unflushed) toilet. It was kind of akin to cuing on the chorus while keeping track of the tenor.

Two things sighted on our morning walk – one made the three year old happy, one made me happy:

What We Ate:

Saturday: Chicken cooked on the griddle and salad.

Sunday: Thai Chicken Soup – From Dinner Illustrated. I added rice noodles.

Monday: Sausage, Peppers, and Onion sautee. Using up an excess of peppers.

Tuesday: Red Pepper Soup – From Dinner Illustrated. See above about excess of peppers.

Wednesday: Tortellini (w/ Red Sauce or Pesto, Diner’s choice), and Arni’s Jr. Salads. This was the baby’s birthday dinner. The Arni’s Jr. Salads are a staple of the Husband’s childhood and home state. We like to re-create them at home since we can’t get them here.

Thursday: Indian Eggplant Curry (Instant Pot), and Cumin Potatoes from Indian Instant Pot Cookbook.

Friday: Pizza and Lilo and Stitch. I had picked up Lilo and Stich four or five years ago, but we had never made it through because the eight year always got sad and scared and had us turn it off. I particularly remember her saying, “You don’t rip books!”

Weekly Recap + what we ate

Fall seemed to arrive this week. We turned the air conditioner off and opened the windows, letting a breeze blow bracingly through the house. It actually got downright chilly. I’ve put apple picking on my list of things to do in the next few weeks – I think it might make a good Wednesday afternoon activity.

Sleep was rough this week. A combination of staying up too late so I can work on projects without children underfoot, and the baby waking in the middle of the night and having to be nursed back to sleep. I’m hoping it’s molars and that she will be better at sleeping soon. Teething is such a disruptive phase, but then when one thinks about the process of teething – basically these razor sharp objects piercing your gums from the inside to the out – one thinks, how can it be otherwise.

This week, I dropped off a couple of mini fridges at a local charity. The fridges had been in the basement – our “beer fridges” – but we had replaced them with a full sized fridge last month. In these crazy COVID times I had to book a drop off appointment a month ago! I took the three year old with me to drop the fridges and run a few other errands. As we drove through down town, he exclaimed in wonder, “Look at all the places!” It was adorable and heartbreaking.

I signed up to take a drawing class through the local community college, and this week was the first class. Several times a year, the community college continuing ed catalogue lands in our mail slot, and I flip through it, thinking it might be nice to learn something new. Taking classes, particularly evening classes is not really compatible with a show schedule, so it’s always been kind of a wistful thought. This year, with encouragement from the Husband, I decided to take advantage of the convenience of classes being taught through Zoom and my unemployed status, and signed up for a class.

There were a couple of different classes I contemplated signing up for – some more practical than drawing. Appliance repair, for example. Computer programming – probably beyond me, but could provide a good career pivot if needed. I chose drawing. I had thought about taking watercolor class, but then decided I wanted to start with something fundamental.

So I ordered art supplies and pads of paper larger than any art I can conceive of, and on Wednesday afternoon, I logged into class, along with twelve other students. The class is mostly made up of retirees (including two former middle school teachers), with a couple of thirty-something computer programmers as well. There is one elderly couple taking the class together. They have not figured out how to mute, and listening to their old married couple banter was one of the most delightful parts of the first class. Being back in a formal learning environment was definitely odd. There was a certain receptiveness that my brain took on that did feel like dusting the cobwebs off something that had been tucked away for too long. We even had assigned reading and homework.

Speaking of appliance repair, the dryer at my parent’s rental house stopped working so I spent a morning waiting for the service tech. Watching him take the dryer apart, diagnose, and remedy the issue was kind of fascinating. Maybe I will take that appliance repair class after all. It would certainly pay for itself over the years.

All it took was a screw gun! I can do that!

The Husband took Wednesday afternoon off, and after my drawing class we took a trip to the Agricultural Farm Park. I had brought the kids here earlier in the summer, and it was great to see it again in a different season. The dahlia garden was still going strong, but a lot of other things were starting to be put away for the season. We saw only a handful of people there while we were there; instead of people we saw large stretches of blue skies and corn.

What we ate:

Saturday: Black bean and red pepper quesadillas. I also had some shishito peppers from our produce box that I threw on the griddle and blackened to eat alongside.

Sunday: Thai Basil Chicken Lettuce Wraps. From America’s Test Kitchen. It was a little too spicy and the kids ended up having peanut butter toast for dinner.

Monday: Stir fry – tofu, bean, eggplant, red pepper. A clean out the produce drawer meal.

Tuesday: Black lentil dal and Paneer Biryani (from Indian InstantPot). I’ve made paneer a couple of times, but it always had turne out crumbly. I finally bought a paneer/tofu press. It is not great for tofu pressing, but my paneer turned out great this time.

Wednesday: Called an audible when we drove by a favorite sandwich place on the way home from the Agricultural Farm Park. Sandwiches and onion rings.

Thursday: Mushroom Leek Crostata from Dinner Illustrated. Though the Husband and 8 year old grabbed Five Guys on the way home from dance class. I have a great weakness for french fries,, and they brought me some. It wasn’t as good as when you each them fresh and salty and hot, but it was still pretty tasty.

Friday: Pizza and wings while watching Star Wars: The Last Jedi (8 year old’s turn to pick). Carrie Fisher – such an elegant lady. I think she was my favorite part of the movie.

Weekly Recap + What We Ate

We celebrated Labor Day by grilling burgers and had a long video chat with my brother’s family. They are in California and the air quality made it unwise to go outside, so we “hung out” for most of the afternoon. The kids are getting better at interactive video chatting, I think.

The rest of the week was quite rainy. One day we got five inches of rain in an afternoon, and the kids spent “recess” outside in the rain. I wish we could send some of our rain to California and Oregon.

We are into week two of distance learning. The eight year old seems to be very much into music, art, and PE. Friday, the carbon monoxide detector went off in our house, and I hustled the kids outside. This was in the middle of class, but luckily, you can get wireless signal on our back patio. Turns out it was just a battery issue with the alarm, but it wasn’t terrible to have class outside. The mosquitoes made it not a practical long term set up, but I can absolutely see us doing this again. A mom in my mom’s group gave me a tip to spray down an old shirt with repellent and just have that near by rather than spraying down the kid. That, and running a box fan seemed to minimize the mosquito bites, but they are still a lot of them. I think more than the weather, it’s the mosquitoes that keep me inside some days. I am intrigued by the idea of a bat box to help alleviate the mosquito problem in our back yard.

This is what learning looked like this week. Mosquito repellent soaked t-shirt on her lap, and box fan going to keep the bugs away.

We’ve signed the 8 year old up for dance and basketball classes. Being home by herself has hit her harder than I had thought, so I took a look and decided that there were a few activities that I felt okay with enrolling her in.

On that note, I’ve been sewing masks so that she has enough for her activities. I’ve been trying out a couple different patterns to see which ones fit best.

This week I finished repairing and re-installing the screens for the sunroom of my parents’ house as they have renters coming in soon. Replacing screens is one of those things I would have never thought to do myself, but the Husband looked it up on YouTube and said to me, “You could totally do this!” And it did turn out to be pretty easy. Basically the screen is held in to the window frame by a piece of rubber tubing (called spline) wedged into a groove. So all one does is remove the spline and pull the old screen out, then lay down new screen and use a special tool to put new spline in. Definitely worth doing myself.

In and around these activities, I’ve been doing some art with the three year old, taking walks when we can. The baby hasn’t been sleeping super well lately. A couple nights she was attached to me pretty much all night. Maybe it’s molars?

Some delightful food things:

There is a great garden haul of basil (see above). I blitzed up a heap of pesto – made with sunflower seeds since we don’t have pine nuts. Also some of the basil is going into America Test Kitchen’s Thai Chicken Basil this week.

My pandemic snack addiction is Welch’s fruit snacks. Each pack is a unknown combination of flavors and the anticipation of ripping open a pack to see what it contains is one of the small joys in my life. Then the careful contemplation of what order to eat them in – I like to eat from least favorite to most favorite – raspberry, strawberry, orange, peach, grape. Then there is a calculus I do in my head if there are more grape then orange or peach, maybe I will eat the grape until the numbers even out first…. It is a process. This week, I got a perfect pack:

Random picture of the kids’ lunch one day. So I’ll remember what they ate. The 8 year old made her own sandwich, while the 3 year old and the baby got mostly snack food and leftovers. The cucumbers are cream cheese with furikake, a Japanese rice seasoning which the 3 year old loves – I do too. I like the nori, sesame, bonito combinations the best.

What We Ate:

Saturday: Steak Salad – Husband cooked and this was tasty.

Sunday: BBQ Bean Tacos with Pineapple Salsa. Made some coleslaw on the side (Cabbage, lime juice, a touch of mayo). Coleslaw seems to be the unexpected hit of the summer.

Monday: Grilled Burgers and Eggplant

Tuesday: Drunken Noodles (from Dinner Illustrated)

Wednesday: Pasta with Zucchini, Tomatos and Broccoli. Basically an eat down the veggie drawer meal.

Thursday: Sausage Kale Soup. This was Irish Dance night for the eight year old, so I needed something I could make ahead of time.

Friday: Pizza and Movie. It was the three year old’s turn to pick. He chose Fireman Sam and then Nature Movies. It was a little stomach turning to watch animals being eaten alive onscreen while having dinner, but I guess we remind ourselves that it’s how life works.

Weekly Recap + What we ate

One week of distance learning in the books! I have to say, it wasn’t as difficult as I had feared. This fall is has had a much more structured and supported learning environment than what everyone (students, parents, teachers, administrators) were thrown into last spring. I felt last spring that there was a lot of independent learning expected from the students. Our school district still has implemented a very long day of distance learning (9am – 3:15pm), but the day is built so that the kids are usually never on Zoom for more than an hour at a time. The one exception is when morning meeting runs into math period – so a 1h 20 m session. But it’s the first period of the day, so not horrible. There is an hour and a half for lunch and two 10-15 minute breaks – one in the morning and one in the afternoon. It seems to be much closer to what I had when I was growing up, where there was lots of outdoor play time.

Wednesday afternoons are designated “independent study.” I’d love to spend a few hours either going on an outing or tackling something the eight year old is independently interested in learning.

I do feel like in person learning is probably more effective for the 8 year old, but at least I am able to be home and support her. I know that this is a luxury that not all families have, so I’m trying to see this as a side benefit of this period of unemployment. All in all, however, the week of schooling went quite smoothly. There were a couple of incidents of accidentally logging out of the Zoom waiting room before class, but hopefully we are turning it into a learning experience on how to tell time.

(Speaking of which – are kids still expected to be able to read analog clocks and watches? I feel like all the clocks on our walls are analog, so this is indeed a good thing to teach the kids. Also is a good lesson in how to count by fives.)

This week was a bit of disaster for the younger two kids’ routines because I was trying to make sure the eight year old got where she needed to be virtually. School started right around the baby’s nap time, making a bit of a mess out of that. I’ve never been one of those people who are slaves to a baby’s nap times, but I do think the day goes more smoothly when the baby has regular naps. I’m hopeful, that having the eight year old on a schedule will be helpful in giving the rest of us a rhythm to the day eventually, though. I can try to fit naps, nursing sessions, and structured activity time for the baby and the three year old around the eight year old’s class, and we can all have recess together. New school year, new patterns for everyone, I guess. It is an ever evolving thing.

Other highlights this week: The baby has figured out how to drink from a straw. At least she figured out how to suck the water up. She still is working on swallowing the water that she fills her mouth with. Half the time she sucks up a great big mouthful and then lets it just dribble out the sides of her mouth.

She has also figured out how to climb up on low chairs. She’ll climb up on them and stand, holding on to the chair back as if at a lectern, her face glowing with pride and accomplishment. It is cute but so scary.

We didn’t get out for as many long walks as we used to, but on Thursday there was a giant downpour and both kids took great laughing delight in running in the rain. It’s funny how these kids don’t like to bathe, but love running outside as the heavens open and unleash sheets and sheets of water.

Two food highlights this week:

The Husband brought home a watermelon from the grocery store. I love watermelon but it does take a while to finish. Now that we have a new full size fridge in the basement, there is not as much urgency to eat it all in one day, which is nice. I’ve been enjoying watermelon, feta salad – something my friend Lizzie introduced me to. Watermelon, feta, a sprinkle of basil. That’s it, simple and tasty.

Leftover rice and salmon, with avocado, umboshi paste and cucumber.

Also – for lunch I’ve been making sushi rolls with leftovers. It’s not true sushi rice, so things fall apart a little bit, but it’s still a tasty way to eat things up. A couple years ago, I picked up a packet of umeboshi puree from a fancy grocery store just outside of Philadelphia. It’s one of my favorite ingredients in sushi; there used to be a Japanese restaurant that had a Ume Shiso roll – just ume paste, and a shiso leaf wrapped in rice. It was the most delicate, delicious thing you ever tasted. I don’t actually know of too many other ways to eat umeboshi puree, so it’s been sitting in our fridge for a while. Surprisingly, though, it is still good, and really made these rolls special.

This Week’s Menu:

Saturday: We had Indian take out from the local Indian restaurant.

Sunday: Lasagna. This was the lasagna the 8 year and I were supposed to make last week, but had to postpone. It was her idea and she helped me make the sauce, mix the ricotta and layer the lasagna.

Monday: Pork and Green Bean Stir Fry. From Dinner Illustrated.

Tuesday: Cauliflower Tacos with Mango Cabbage Slaw. From Dinner Illustrated.

Wednesday: Green Curry with tofu and veggies. I used this new curry paste from HMart and it was definitely spicier than the Thai Kitchen brand that I usually get.

Thursday: The Husband made dinner. Breakfast sandwiches with bacon.

Friday: Pizza and Bend it Like Beckham. The eight year old has been listening to the Aru Shah series and it put me in the mood for this movie, though I hadn’t seen it in a while. It mostly holds up in its story of being stuck between two cultures, as a child and as a parent. The soccer bits and the wedding scene are pretty fun too. (“That’s not football!” the kids said.) I’d forgotten how cringe-y the romantic subplots were, though. I think there are a lot of romance storylines that are not aging well in the wake of the MeToo movement. The realization that power imbalances are not really healthy foundations for romantic relationships certainly has me seeing these plotlines with a new awareness. I don’t think those kind of relationships are necessarily something that is impossible to have now, I just think it needs to be navigated in a more conscious way.

Weekly Recap + What we ate

Last week was our final week of summer vacation. School starts tomorrow. I’m trying to keep an open mind about distance learning and hope that I can be as supportive as possible.

I have to say, I do miss our annual trip to buy school supplies. There is nothing like that smell of Staples, the whiff when you walk in of plastic and wooden pencils. And fresh school supplies! So pristine and full of potential! Well at least this year, I didn’t have to silence my inner critic when the eight year old chooses a garish sparkly backpack featuring a licensed character. Something in me finds it hard to be supportive when confronted with so much glitter and shine, knowing it will have to be replaced come January.

I wanted to take advantage of the lack of screen obligations this week to spend time outdoors, and so we went on two outdoor adventures: a small walk along a creek on Monday, and for our Thursday adventure we went to Patapsco State Park. Both times the children whined that they didn’t like walking, but then ended up having a great time.

Patapsco was perfect for a hot hot day. The hike we chose was near a creek so the kids could play in the water. We didn’t bring any swim clothes, but they plunged into the water fully clothed and didn’t seem to mind. The river was pretty low so the three year old could go wading safely. Afterwards I asked the eight year old what made this adventure a good hike and she said, unequivocally, “It was near water.” I’ll have to file that one away for future hiking trips.

I tried out the hiking backpack carrier for the first time with the baby. It was a something that my brother had passed down to us last year. I had been reluctant to use it because I was afraid it was going to bulky. But you know what is truly bulky? Front carrying a baby in an Ergo while having a backpack of snacks and supplies on your back. My brother’s hiking pack had all sorts of pockets so lunch was tucked into a little space underneath the baby’s seat, while towels, wipes, one single diaper and hand sanitizer also had its own pocket. All the supplies and the baby on my back – with a sun shade! So easy and practical.

The hike to the waterfall was short but steep. There were a few moments where I almost pitched over with the baby on my back, but we all managed it to the water falls. We were one of the only people wearing masks, but groups seemed to be trying to give other groups some space, if not always 6 feet. The trail seemed unusually populated for a weekday morning, and I don’t know that I would feel comfortable there on a weekend, truth be told.

The baby fell asleep in the carrier during the hike and I successfully managed to get her out of the carrier and into the car seat without waking her. Which, as everyone knows, is a monumental achievement of stealth and smoothness. Also helps that sometimes she is a truly deep sleeper. (However, strangely not at 1:30am.) We stopped for ice cream on the way home, though the baby and the 3 year old fell asleep so only the eight year old and I indulged.

We also re-discovered the joys of fort building this week. Well, I had the joy of fort building. The kids had the joy of fort commissioning. We had gotten the kids this fort kit last Christmas. It’s gotten a good amount of use since then – great periods of frenzied activity with it followed by neglect. Earlier this summer we had even taken it outside and made forts in our backyard. This is definitely one of those projects where the kids dictate while I toil. “Taller!” “Can it have two rooms?” “I want a pointy roof!” Which is all fine – I enjoyed the building process, and afterwards I enjoyed the quiet as the kids dragged blankets inside and settled in. I did not, however, enjoy the shouts of disappointment when the forts were collapsed by sibling clumsiness.

Other things this week: my friend/ college roommate came over for “happy hour” – I’m really enjoying that she lives in the area and I hope she never leaves. I cleared out a bunch of space in the freezer by taking breast milk to the milk bank. I did some creative cardboard box building (more on that later). I discovered The Goes Wrong Show on Amazon. Not as funny as I want it to be, but still pretty funny. I do wish that it had more of the backstage view of things, but I don’t think that is the concept. Still contemplating my life choices, and wishing I had the time to do something on that front, but life doesn’t go as well when I neglect the children.

Quote of the week, courtesy of the eight year old: “The day after the pandemic is lifted, we should have a day off school so we can do all the fun things that we didn’t get to do before.”

Also – thing I said this week, that I never thought I would have to say: “Don’t put salami on your sister’s head!”

Last week’s meals:

Saturday: Pasta and meatballs. Super simple all made in the Instant Pot: layer some tomatoe sauce, pasta, frozen meatballs (made months ago because they are a good staple to have in the freezer), and more tomatoe sauce. Cook at high pressure for 22 minutes. On days I’m feeling ambitious, I will make the tomatoe sauce, but Simple Saturday is not for ambitious cooking. The Husband does note that I complicated things by making pesto to go with everything.

Sunday: Cauliflower Chicken Tikka Masala from Dinner Illustrated

Monday: Udon Noodles Stir fried with Vegetables. I believe I used zucchini, carrots and eggplant.

Tuesday: Sweet Potatoe and Chicken Thai Curry from Dinner Illustrated. I used Panang curry rather than red because that’s what we had. A definite winner.

Wednesday: Leftover Cauliflower Chicken Tikka Masala from Sunday. Threw in some potatoes to bulk it up. We had originally planned something else for Wednesday, but… life and consequences.

Thursday: Roasted salmon, pan fried Brussel sprouts and Instant Pot potaotes. Also ate sliced cucumbers on the side. I’ve come to embrace the idea that carrot sticks and cucumbers are a perfectly legitimate side dish.

Friday: Pizza take out while watching East Side Sushi. A lovely movie which left me craving sushi and wanting to sign up for a knife skills class. We streamed it on Amazon, and the subtitles weren’t working for the Spanish and Japanese dialogue scenes, leaving us clueless as to what was going on in many parts. It didn’t make a difference – you could totally tell what was happening. I can’t tell if that is a sign of good story telling, or simplistic story telling. Or maybe both?

Friday Recap + what we ate

This was not a good week for me holding my shit together. But moving on.

I had enrolled the 8 year old in an online drawing class – I was hoping to get her some more interaction, and I think she enjoyed, but it meant that we didn’t get as much outdoor time as we usually do, and I think tempers were somewhat frayed because of that. I’m still trying to figure out what is the right balance of outdoor time and interactive computer time.

We finished up the tie dye projects from last week. The bight starbursts and spirals of colour really made me happy as they sat on the drying rack. The blue dye was more potent than I thought and it took four wash cycles to get to a place where the shirts did not bleed in the wash.

Our adventure this week was to the zoo. A lot of the buildings were closed so that social distancing could be maintained, but there was still lions, tigers, and elephants to be seen and ice cream to be eaten. I don’t know that I would feel comfortable going again; people were really good about wearing masks, but I would have preferred more distancing. I keep optimistically taking the kids to places that have opened with precautions in place, but then realizing that the variety in people’s risk tolerance does not really put me at ease.

I watched the Met’s beautiful production of Eugene Onegin starring Anna Netrebko. For once, I watched it on our tv rather than on my computer or iPad. There is so much opera content out there right now. I want to take advantage of the chance to see these operas, but I also want to remember to really watch and not just view. Hopefully being more choosy as to what I watch and watching it in a focused way will help towards that.

(Incidentally, it was a double Netrebko week – for Friday movie night, we watched the Princess Diaries 2: Royal Engagement, in which I was surprised and delighted when she made a brief appearance as “Opera Singer Anna.” The eight year old was really excited to hear opera in a movie. More so when she could identify it – “That’s La Traviata!” she shouted, as if it were trivia night. )

The 3 year old needed new shoes; his old shoes had holes in the toes. We made an appointment for our local kids’ shoe store and had a trip there. He chose some bright pink shoes. I appreciated how the lady at the store who fitted him did not bat an eye or try to steer him towards the rack of blue and green shoes. He is now a 10 extra wide. I asked about shoes for the just walking baby and our salesperson said that they weren’t necessary until cooler weather.

The Democratic National Convention was this week- a strange, slick affair of speeches and effusive partisan love. It was odd to listen to these rousing speeches devoid of audience applause or reaction; a certain momentum seemed lost to me. I was reminded anew about what a powerful and heartfelt orator Barack Obama was, and how inspiring he could be. The vitriol in his speech was a little surprising, but perhaps shouldn’t have be, given the occasion.

For me the most meaningful aspect of the Democratic ticket right now is Kamala Harris. More and more this year, I’ve come to see that representation in the mainstream matters. Everyone talks about Kamala Harris being Black, but I think it is equally important to recognize that she is half Asian. Part of the story that we were traditionally told about being the “model minority” was about being quiet and assimilating, being invisible even. I am recognizing, however, that the model minority trope is unfair and oppressive, and in fact hurts true diversity.

When the people that are seen in positions of leadership are all white and male, it is easy to think that is just how things are. Regardless of what I think of Harris’ past performance and policies, to see a Vice Presidential candidate that is from the same continent as my parents is amazing and can’t be taken for granted. When she was nominated as Biden’s pick for running mate, I almost cried as I stood in the kitchen listening to the news.

Here is what we ate this past week:

Saturday – Zucchini boats (using up leftover filling from last week’s zucchini boats)

Sunday – Shrimp and Broccoli Pad Thai from Dinner Illustrated. This was really really tasty. It was a lighter, tastier version than take out.

Monday – Salmon Tacos with Cabbage Mango Slaw

Tuesday – Stir fry (Eggplant, green beans, peppers)

Wednesday – Broccoli Quiche and Salad. Quiche made ahead of time, before we went to the zoo. Quiche is actually a pretty regular easy meal for us – I make a big batch of pie dough and freeze it, so all that I have to do is saute vegetables, blend milk (or buttermilk), eggs, flour, garlic, herbs together with shredded cheese. Put it all into the pie crust and bake. It feels fancier than it really is. Also great for using up bits of veggies in the fridge.

Thursday – Ginger Catfish, made by husband. Really tasty