hiking with kids – Life Off Headset

(bi)Weekly recap + what we ate: Presidents and Valentines

A crisp clear day and the American Art Museum.

The kids had Monday off for President’s Day, but there were still activities that weekend, so we styed in town and did some in town fun things. Saturday there was snow and the 12 year old’s basketball game ended up cancelled. Since the morning opened up, we decided to take the Metro downtown to a museum. We chose the American Art Museum because there was an orchid exhibit in its courtyard. We got down there are 11:00am, only to find that the museum didn’t open until 11:30am. So we decided to go to the library, which was across the street.

The library was recently renovated and the new children’s section is huge. And there is a whole separate teen section which the 12 year old went to explore on her own. The children’s section has lots of tables and chairs and cozy nooks for kids to curl up and read and a huge section of picture books in different languages. There is also a slide from the 2nd floor, where the children’s section is to the floor below. What a fun idea.

After the library we went to pizza at Ella’s and then headed to the American Art Museum. The Kogod Courtyard is one of my favorite places in DC – it is a bright and sunny oasis in the city, and usually quiet and peaceful. However, this day they were having a Family Day to honor President’s Day, so it was decidedly not quiet or peaceful. There were lots of crafts and activities, and at one point there was a Fife and Drum corps from a school in Virginia. The kids ended up making stovepipe hats at a booth sponsored by the Abraham Lincoln Cottage (one of my favorite museums in DC, by the way. Though it is out of the way and you have to pay to go, so I’ve only been a few times. But if I have to recommend a museum for people who have exhausted the Smithsonian, I always recommend visiting this one and the Frederick Douglass House in tandem.) And there was some dressing up, and a collage activity. Though by the time we got to the collage activity, the only president left was Andrew Garfield or Chester Arthur or some such.

Orchid sculpture. There were real orchids too, but the place was so crowded it was hard to get good pictures.

We did wander through the galleries afterwards. We took in the gallery of “Self Taught Art”, or what the museum calls Folk Art. I like these galleries a lot, seeing things that people create just for the joy of creating, not because they are artists and it pays the bills – ordinary things like quilts and lawn ornaments. I always like looking at this work, which is mostly made of cardboard and tin foil.

The whole exhibit inspires me to make time for creativity in life.

All in all, not the museum visit I had expected, but still a nice outing.

Sunday we had Agility class for the four year old, church for the older two kids and then we went to the Dumpling House for a birthday lunch for one of my best friends. We ordered soooooo much food – dumplings and sauteed greens and noodles and cucumber salad and and garlic eggplant…. I think something got lost in translation and we also had a fried sweet potato dish (Snowfield sweet potato) that was almost like dessert – sweet potato, coated in crunchy rice stick and fried so that the outside was crispy and the inside soft and molten. So good! We always order the same thing when we go to the dumpling house, so it’s fun when something new shows up.

Monday we decided to go on a hike – we hiked from Great Falls north to Riverbend Park, about 5 miles round trip. This is farther north from the spectacular falls of Great Falls, but it’s a gentler hike with beautiful views of the Potomac. The kids have a game they play when we go hiking, called “Rock Kingdom” it involves each child claiming a rock to sit on and the oldest one calling for Rock Kingdom Counsels and then they gather and make plans on how to run their kingdoms. It’s super cute. I’m sure the 12 year old doesn’t always want to play with her younger siblings, so I really treasure these moments when she fully engages with them and leads them in such imaginative play.

Art Class: The past two art classes were spent on clouds and sunsets. Clouds are fun – one of the techniques we learned was to paint the sky then, using a paper towel, lift away the colour to make clouds. I thought that technique was pretty high impact for very low effort. Also, the teacher had us make clouds of all colours and even since I’ve found myself looking at clouds and realizing how many colours they contain. They aren’t just white. Even still, I think my efforts at clouds came out much too grey. Also I’m having difficulties blending my colours. Getting the orange/yellow of the sunset to blend up into the blue of the sky without turning green is tricky.

First effort on top. Second on bottom. Hopefully there’s improvement.

This is my in class effort of sunsets, though I think they look more like moon rises.

This is my homework sunsets. The pink and blue sunset on the bottom left of the quartet was kind a disaster. Then the next morning I woke up and looked a the pictures without my glasses on and it looked so much better and suddenly I could see what was wrong with it – I hadn’t allowed the paint to blend from pink to blue slowly. So I thought I’d give that one a second try.

Also – the pictures look muuuuuch better from farther away.

One other thing I realized when doing the homework that one trick to making things look brighter is to also have darker things in the picture to create contrast, which was what I was trying to do with the picture on the bottom right.

I think watercolor is interesting because it seems quite easy in principal to create something beautiful. Just a simple wash of colour can be so elegant. But once you get past the easy stuff, the really detailed work requires a lot of care.

Valentine’s Day – I’m not a huge Valentine’s Day person, so the big win this year was that the Husband ordered the valentines for the kids. I didn’t even have to say anything about it to him. Awesome. I did spend an hour cutting up fruit for the 7 year old’s class party, only to see an email the day of that said the school was banning all consumption of food in the classrooms for Valentines Day. Apparently there was an allergy incident in another classroom the last time there was a class party. Which I respect that decision – I just wished I had realized that before I peeled an entire Costco bag of mandarin oranges. I apparently am not the most diligent reader of school communication. wump wump. I did go volunteer in the 7 year old’s class for the party. I’m always impressed by the level of French in his classroom. I know it’s an immersion program, so that is in the point, but to see seven and eight year olds who a year and a half years ago didn’t know any French, communicate with each other in full sentences is really amazing. Also – Teachers are heroes to spend all day with our kids.

The Best Morning This Week. So I wake up on morning from sleeping on the futon in the kids’ room because the 12 year old and I had a COVID exposure, so she and I are sleeping in one room for the week while the Husband and the other two kids sleep in our room. The 12 year old desperately wants to be sick to stay home from school, so while I’m downstairs making breakfast, she tries to doctor her COVID test with a red pen. I am simultaneously impressed by her gumption, but also trying hard not to laugh at how inept she is being at faking a positive COVID test. It was pretty bad. So I send her to school. Then move on with my morning.

At 8:15 – 30 minutes before we have to go to school, the seven year old tells me his Black History Month project is due that day. (Which, if I bothered to turn on the notifications in the class Slack channel I would realize because the panic I felt was reflected in the many messages from other parents about this project. Only those panicked messages were sent two days ago…). I originally go all “strict mom” and tell him, “Tough hooey, you can tell your teacher that you forgot to do it.” But then there were tears and I’m a softie, so ten minutes before we leave for the bus, he’s is drawing Louis Armstrong and taping it to an old can, which I had to pull out of the recycling on the curb – thank goodness it hadn’t been collected yet.

“What does a trumpet look like?” he asks me. And I open the page from Picturepedia of musical instruments and try to talk him through how to draw a trumpet with all its valves and what nots. Meanwhile the “school bus” alarm is going off. And I finally just say, “F*** that. Just draw a cornet.”

So the follow up to last week’s laments on how I have no morning routine – this is exactly why there is no routine.

At any rate – yes, the 12 year old and I had a COVID exposure. It’s been kind of fascinating, and perhaps a little bit triggering, to pull the masks out again and swabbing our noses every morning to do the COVID tests, and to worry about whom we are spending time with. We personally haven’t had a brush with COVID in probably more than two years, and at first I was very self conscious about having to mask again. But then I realized that even though we aren’t masking all the time as we once were, it has become a very normal thing to do. And it’s the kind and prudent thing to do. So there we go.

Things I learned from This Week’s Crossword Puzzle: The playlist edition.
This week’s crossword puzzle discoveries were all musicians whom I had never heard of. So I made myself a little playlist of their music one evening:
– Tegan and Sara – (“Everything is Awesome” singers ___ and Sara) Okay, had heard that song, but didn’t know the group. Peppy, pop sound.
– Angie Stone – (Stone with the R&B album “The Art of Love & War”)
–Say It Ain’t So – (“___ It Ain’t So” Weezer Song). I knew Weezer was a band, one that was pretty popular when I was growing up. Could not name any of their songs to save my life.
–Ella Mai (“Boo’d Up” Singer). British R&B Artist. New to me. Actually R&B is a whole genre of music that I’m woefully ignorant on.

Watching:
Nai Nai and Wai Po. This short documentary film by Taiwanese American filmmaker Sean Wang was nominated for an Oscar. It documents the every day life of his two grandmothers. One is 94 and one is 83 and they have been roommates for years and live life with such a joyful pragmatism – they make music, they make dinner, they arm wrestle, the argue about farting, they talk about life and living a long one. From the first moment of the film, I recognized my own grandparents and my own parents, even. In less than twenty minutes, this little film made me laugh, cry, and feel seen and understand what it’s like to contemplate humanity with the perspective of nine decades.

Incidentally, there are two documentary shorts by Taiwanese Americans nominated for Oscars this year. That feels pretty special to me. The other one is about the Taiwanese Island of Kimen which is just off the coast of China. I guess now I can say I’ve watched at least two of the Oscar nominated films this year.

Watching, and a Rant:
Hallmark Binge Pass- I’ve discovered that with my Library card, I can get a Hallmark Binge Pass via Hoopla, which gives me access to a huge collection of Hallmark movies and tv shows – cue up the fluffy, heartwarming entertainment. It’s been perfect accompaniment as I wash dishes late at night or work on my painting homework. So far I’ve watched An American in Austen, a movie about a modern day librarian who finds herself living in Pride and Prejudice. The movie was cute, and as an ardent Darcy fangirl, it was hilarious to see their take on Darcy as an unbearably pushy and kind of annoying person. I’ve also watched a bunch of holiday movies because…. the heart wants what the heart want, right? Okay, but here is one huge vent though- I usually watch things with the subtitles on and I was watching a movie called Make Me A Match, a movie about ambitious Vivi, who works for a dating app. She meets an Indian matchmaker and strikes a deal with the matchmaker to learn about her methods so that she can distill the matchmaker’s success down into something she can use to improve her app. The matchmaker’s son Boom is tasked with helping Vivi. Predictable sparks fly… It’s a lovely movie and you know me, representation is my catnip, so I was really enjoying this one. Except, we get to the end of the movie when Vivi and Boom get married in a huge Indian wedding ceremony and when the officiant begins the wedding ceremony, the titles just say, “Chanting in foreign language.” Come on, Hallmark! You can do better. Tell us what language the guy is chanting in! Also… during the party afterwards, there are subtitles for the songs in English, but the songs in Hindi just say, “Singing in foreign language.” Why does the song in English get its words captioned and not the one in Hindi? If it even is in Hindi – I’m going to be honest, I’m pretty ignorant about Indian languages, which is why it would have been cool if the subtitles had told me what language it was and what was being said. I don’t know – maybe I’m being overly sensitive, but there are huge swaths of the population for whom this isn’t a “foreign” language and I kind of resent it being labelled as “foreign.” This is not how we normalize non-English languages and cultures, folks. AmI expecting too much of a Hallmark movie? I mean the whole thing might have been captioned by an AI bot for all I know. But in which case, surely the AI bot can figure it out without labelling something “foreign.” “Foreign” is relative.

Grateful For:
– COVID tests and masks. I’m glad we had a supply of masks and tests to use when we had our COVID exposure. It’s funny how the bin of tests in our linen closet that seemed like a lot, quickly can be used up. Luckily our library is still handing out free COVID tests, so I can stock up next time I go. Also grateful that we didn’t actually get COVID. Also grateful that we are no longer in the Spring of 2020.

-For the vocal recital that I got to do the supertitles for. A beautiful evening of music, plus getting to hear Barber’s Knoxville: Summer of 1915 performed live. It is usually performed with an orchestra; hearing it with just piano accompaniment really brought out the jazzy influences in the music – the piece had a certain swing that isn’t always apparent with orchestral versions.

-Museums and libraries and National Parks. Things I don’t begrudge my tax dollars at work for.

-Making it up the hills on my bike. And lower gears. Every time I brush my bike off after a pause, even of a week or two, I am a little defeated by the hills between home and work. This time was no different. However, by my second day of bike commuting, I could make it up those hills. I just put the bike in a lower gear and keep my head down and keep pedaling. I’ve also discovered that it helps to sit a little more upright in my seat when I go up hills. I’m sure there’s a scientific explanation for that.

Looking forward to:
– A visit from a high school friend. One of the nice things about living in DC is that every so often people come here for work and I get to see them! This friend is the only friend from high school that I still keep in touch with. Her parents, like mine, are from Taiwan, and we’ve always bonded over that. (This happened! this is what I get for being so slow to post. anyhow, it was a lovely visit – more later!)

– A cherimoya! My abovementioned friend brought some fruit from California among which was a cherimoya. My late grandmother loved cherimoyas and I always think of her when I have one. There are not very prevalent here – once in a while I’ll see them at HMart – so this was a nice treat and I’m looking forward to eating the last one. For those who haven’t had a cherimoya, it’s a fruit with a very soft inside that kind of tastes like banana-pear custard.

-Peak Bloom! Peak bloom forecasts are being released this week – I wait with eager anticipation. There are a few of the early blooming trees that can already be seen around town, a riot of pink.

– Lenten reading group. A friend invited me to join a Lenten reading group – we read a book that has a reading and reflection for each day of Lent, and then come together three times to discuss it. I’m not Catholic, so the invitation to join gave me pause, but I do like contemplating life and reflecting on my life choices, so I thought this group might be a nice social/spiritual activity.

-Cooking from these two cookbooks, which I picked up from the library:

What We Ate:

Monday: Crispy coconut rice. This recipe. Basically you crumble tofu into cooked rice, add curry paste and other spices and then fry it in a cast iron skillet until the bottom gets crispy. Wrap in lettuce leaf and top with mint to eat. Tasty and very flavorful and also comes together very quickly. The two little kids didn’t care for it as much, but I think it’s because it’s kind of a new concept. I would make it again – a great use for leftover rice. Vegan.

Tuesday: Sweet Potato and Black Bean Tacos. Roast diced sweet potato in a pan and then mix with black beans. We eat it with the leftover guacamole from SuperBowl Sunday. Quick and easy meal. Vegan.

Wednesday: Instant Pot Braised Chickpeas with Tomatoes. Since I was working this evening and we had an excess of dried chickpeas to use up, I was looking for an InstantPot chickpea recipe. The best part of this is the tahini swirl that you add at the end. Vegan.

Thursday: Pasta and meatballs. I had made and frozen meatballs in tomato sauce last December, so I pulled those out and we ate them with pasts. Thank you to past me for freezing meatballs.

Friday: Pizza (take out) and Galavant. I might have fallen asleep.

Saturday: Pizza (The Husband made) and Moana. I hadn’t seen Moana before despite making the middle child a Hey Hey costume for Halloween when when he was two. The kids, have seen it several times and love it. It is indeed a great movie.

Sunday: We didn’t actually have dinner this day. We were so full from dumplings and noodles at my friend’s birthday lunch that we just kind of weren’t hungry the rest of the day. There might have been popcorn or fruit or ample snacking.

Monday: Lentil Soup and flatbread. I’m trying to incorporate more lentils in our life because they are cheap and healthy and not terrible for the environment. I can’t for the life of me remember what lentil soup recipe I made, but I’m pretty sure I made this in the Instant Pot. To go along with it, I made this yogurt flatbread recipe from Smitten Kitchen.

Tuesday: Celery Cashew with Five Spice Tofu. We got two bunches of celery in our produce box. We aren’t huge celery people – usually it goes in soups or we eat it with peanut butter. So I thought I’d try this recipe that would put the celery front and center, though I didn’t have 5 spice tofu, so I pressed extra firm tofu, dusted it with 5 spice powder and then pan fried it. I thought it was pretty good for being a dish based around celery. Vegan.

Wednesday: Egg Sandwiches on bagels. Sometimes on Wednesdays when the kids have early piano lessons, I will pick up some bagels for breakfast, and then also enough extras so that we can have breakfast sandwiches for dinner. One of our easy go to quick dinners.

Thursday: Meatball subs. We had some frozen meatballs from the store to use up.

Friday: Pizza (take out) and Galavant. We re-watched one of the episodes from last week since I had fallen asleep. We have a nice Friday night routine now- after basketball practice for the 12 year old, they come home with pizza. We watch two episodes of Galavant while eating pizza. The kids go upstairs and get into pjs and brush their teeth, without help from a parent (that’s key), and the can come down and watch one more episode. Not sure what we are going to watch when we are done with Galavant – there are only two seasons and we’re halfway through the second. Any recommendations?

Well, I just realized that March is bearing down around the corner! Wow. But we do get a bonus February day tomorrow – that is always a fun thought, even though in theory it is just another day.

Christmas 2023 + the rest of December

Happy New Year!

Here we are in a brand new year. I wrote a check for the kids’ piano lessons this morning, and wrote 2024 for the first time. It always seems special writing that first check of the year, and remembering to write in the right year.

Everyone is back in school and back at work (except me – I go back to work at the end of the week), and I feel like I finally have time and room and capacity to think and be and not just do. The Husband had a therapist once who always reminded him that we are human beings not human doings. There has been a lot of doing these past few weeks. Five people at home on vacation makes for a lot of meals and dishes and laundry and picking up, I’m finding. And the pockets of time I did find, I just felt so scattered – I couldn’t sustain concentrate on things like writing here or reading books for more than a page at a time. So there was some aimless drifting and puttering and a lot of Hallmark movies. And baking and cooking – making food always seems like a nice activity to pull me out of being idle, yet not being too mentally taxing. And scrolling. And random internet surfing. It seems like whenever I sat down to write, I’d get distracted by some internet errand – holiday gifts still to research and procure, plans to make, other people’s news… All in all I’ve been feeling a kind of mental malaise and not quite sure how to kick it. So I’m just going to start with the run down of how the rest of December and our holiday went.

Fun and Festive Things, Pre-Christmas:
Our first Snow delay! This was mid December – There was a smattering of snow on the ground and we woke up to a two hour delay at school. The 4 year old and the 6 year old wanted to play in the scant snow, so I bundled them up and sent them in the backyard where they played for about an hour or so. Of course the snow was gone by the afternoon – it seemed hardly worth a two hour delay, but it was nice to have a change up to the routine.

Tuba Christmas! I feel like we didn’t do our usual full slate of holiday activities this year, but even so Tuba Christmas is a must for us. We go every year. It is pretty much the same concert every year – hundreds of tuba (and euphoniums and baritones), playing Christmas carols, audience sing a long, “Santa Wants a Tuba for Christmas”, the kids going up onstage to sing “Jingle Bells”. Even the patter between songs is always the same. This year, hilariously, the MC gave the wrong introduction to one carol. Which made us laugh and laugh because it’s been the same MC for as long as I can remember. It was an excellent lesson in making a mistake in front of a thousand people and being able to laugh at oneself.

Celebrating our anniversary. The Husband and I celebrated our anniversary by taking the train into DC to have dinner at the restaurant where we had our wedding dinner. On the way down, we stopped by Union Station where our friend’s string quartet was playing holiday music. It was a fun mix of seasonal tunes and pop hits. She later told me that at one point they noticed that no one was stopping to listen, so she suggested they start playing Beetles and Taylor Swift. And the crowds started gathering. I guess there is something about playing Christmas songs in December that people take for granted, but a string quartet playing Love Story – well that’s special.
After listening to our friend play, we walked to the restaurant and enjoyed much to much indulgent food. And… when the waiter found out that it was our anniversary and that we had had our wedding dinner at that restaurant, he comped up our dessert. What a nice surprise! We finished up the evening by walking through the holiday market – enjoying the cold and the holiday crafts and lights before we got on the train and went home.

We made and decorated cookies. I wasn’t really feeling this, but I rallied and decided to just make two kinds of cookies – sugar cookies for decorating and molasses cookies because those are my favorite. The kids really wanted to decorate cookies and were asking, so I’m glad I managed to do this. I used the leftover royal icing mix from the 4 year old’s birthday which helps simplify the process a lot. I tried a new sugar cookie recipe and it wasn’t great – the cookies ended up spreading too much when they baked and were rather shapeless. I’ll have to research a try a different recipe next year.

Not seeing Christmas Lights. We did not go to any of the many option for seeing Christmas lights, but we did take a a walk after dinner one night and looked at the lights in our neighborhood. There is one house that goes all out for Christmas that is always fun to see.

Work Things – I’m off work until January 4th. Since closing my last show, I worked two vocal recitals (one as stage manager, one doing the super titles). After a fall of opera, a voice recital is a nice balm on my work soul. No chorus of thousands to wrangle, no sets, no costumes, no props. Just a singer, a pianist, and some really great music.

Not so Festive Things:
-Life. Life. Life. Between two kids, I spent six hours at the dentist in the past two weeks. They now have enough crowns between the two of them for a small monarchy. Sigh. At least I got some reading done and they got to watch TV. The dentist has tvs on the ceiling. The four year old watched two straight hours of Bluey while the dentist worked on her teeth.
-General holiday shopping fatigue. I feel this every year. I need to find a less stressful/tiring method of Christmas shopping.

Christmas Day: We had a quiet Christmas at home. I think that is how everyone prefers it, especially the 11 year old. Whenever we float the idea of travelling for Christmas, she is always vehemently opposed. And I get it – there is something nice about waking up in one’s own bed, with the Christmas tree.

Christmas even my mother arrived. We went for a walk at the Botantical Gardens becuase they have a train display, but whe we got there, we found that it was closed because – either because it was Chrstmas Eve or because it was Sunday, not sure which. We spent an hour wandering around anyway, just enjoying the bare beauty of the garden in winter. Then we went home, and got ready for Church. Our Church was having a living Nativity for the first time, so we went a little early to see that. There were donkeys and oxen and a little tiny baby, all bundled up in the manger. Our church has a children’s procession on Christmas Eve, where all the children lead the opening procession, and it was really sweet to see the four year old walking with her hands in prayer position, more docile than I’ve ever seen her. After church, we came home and had chicken curry for dinner then watched the Guardians of the Galaxy Christmas Special before sending the kids to bed. After that, I was up late on cooking (as I usually am) – I made meatballs, rainbow jello, and prepped the cinnamon buns.

Christmas Day we slept in a little bit, waking up around 8:00am. I had to proof the cinnamon buns in the oven. I had hoped that they could do a slow cool rise in the sun room, but that proved to be too cool and they didn’t rise much, so I had to put them in the oven to proof for another hour before I baked them. The kids did stockings first thing, then we talked to the Husband’s sister and family who were in the Netherlands. Then we had cinnamon buns. Then, finally, we did presents around 10pm. I’m surprised the kids were patient to wait that long.

After presents things took a leisurely pace. I picked up wrapping paper, read some, watched the kids play with their presents. At some point, I thought it might be nice to start dinner, so I did that and that took the rest of the day.

The Christmas Day Menu:
-Seafood Paella as the main dish. Ever since a family brought a paella to the 6 year old’s class for their Thanksgiving celebration, I’ve wanted to try to make one. So I decided that it would be Christmas dinner. There are about a gazillion paella recipes online and I couldn’t choose. On Christmas Day, I was texting with my friend in Jordan – her husband was in the foreign service and they had been in Barcelona for a stint – I was lamenting that I didn’t know where to start for my paella recipe and she texted me a recipe from a paella cookbook. The recipe was simple and my friend’s husband said it was pretty flexible and I could use all the seafood that I had bought – calamari, shrimp, scallops and cod. Yay. It turns out paella is simpler to make than I had thought – and it is kind of festive and feeds a lot of people. This won’t be my last time making it!
-Meatballs from a Tapas cookbook we had. I wanted something meaty to complement the paella. Everything I googled said paella is supposed to be it’s own meal, but I don’t know – there is something incimplete about just having a rice dish for dinner, so I made meatballs to go with.
-Rainbow Jello. As always. Though I made it this time since none of the kids were up for making it.
-Orange salad. Something bright and slightly acidic to balance the paella. Most Orange salads call for fennel, but I’m the only one in the family that likes fennel, so I just made this dressing and tossed it over sliced oranges with kalamata olives on the side.
-Green Beans. The Husband steamed and then sauteed some green beans for something a little green.
-Tomato Garlic bread, also from the Tapas Cookbook. Basically toasted bread with garlic olive oil and rub tomato on it.

After dinner, we watched It’s a Wonderful Life and then went to bed. All in all, a nice day.

The week after Christmas had lots of adventures – here’s the highlight reel:

–Taking the two girls and a friend to ClimbZone and then out for Korean food afterwards. I even got to climb too! It is very exhausting. One of my goals for family fun this year is to book a session at the climbing gym for the whole family. After ClimbZone, we went to this Korean place that makes their own noodles and it was fascinating to watch the whole process of pulling and stretching the dough into long strings. I was unfamiliar with a lot of the food and ended up mixing the noodles with the sauce for the shrimp. oops.

–An overnight trip to Lancaster, PA where we visited the Railroad Museum of Pennsylvania:

And we went on a quest for licorice. I had gotten a few bags of Klepper and Klepper salty licorice when we were in Amsterdam, and, as the package says, it is the best licorice ever.

I was very sad when I finished the licorice that I brought home, so I lookonline and the closest place to us to find it is at a candy store in Lancaster, PA called Sweetish, which specializes in candy from Sweden. So when the Husband suggested a trip to the Railroad museum near Lancaster, I immediately suggested we stop by Sweetish as well. The store was amazing. Bins and bins of salty licorice, in addition to Klepper and Klepper. And all sorts of other candy as well. We walked away with a small fortune in candy – In addition to salt licorice of many varieties I also got a smoked licorice. (Of course the two kids who had crowns were not allowed any gummy candy, so they had lots of lollipops. Funny enough, the dentist told them that they could have as much ice cream as they wanted. They just had to remember to brush.).

We stayed in a hotel that night and had some pool time and the next morning we went to Longwood Gardens. The Christmas displays were still up, and even though we didn’t stay to see everything lit up after sundown, we still got a good dose of the holiday display. It was a drizzly, misty day, which has a beauty of its own, I think. A totally precious moment was when the 4 year old started getting tired, so we all took turns carrying her, even the 11 year old. What a good big sister she is!

–Theatre trips. I took my mother to see Fiddler on the Roof as a Christmas present. It was a beautiful production, really well done. The director had framed the show as a story told by a group of immigrants in an Ellis Island-type waiting room. So the different people arriving to America took on the roles of the various characters in Anatevka. I love seeing diversity onstage and I thought this was a reall thoughtful way to have coour conscious, but not colour blind casting. This framework, I thought, also really brought the idea of leaving home front and center in a way that I didn’t usually think of. I mean I knew that Tevye and his family leave Anatevka at the end of the musical, but so much of the beginning of the musical is about the homes and traditions they have established that to think about the beginning of the show through the lens of the end was certainly sobering. Also sobering was the presence of security guards and bag checks throughout the theatre. I feel a little abashed that I go to see a show about a Jewish village and take safety for granted, but there are many people who don’t. Of course going to a show is a bit of escapism, but there was also something very timely about this particular show at this particular time.

The next day, the whole family went to see A Year with Frog and Toad, which was a delightful. I laughed so hard throughout the show. The six year old, who looooves Frog and Toad, kept telling me when things were different from the book. At the end the show, he said, “In the book, they don’t explain how the clock gets broken. And now I know!” Because the breaking of the clock is a major plot point in the musical. Highly recommend this show! We’ve been listening and singing along to the soundtrack ever since. It’s ostensibly a kids’ show, but there were certainly many moments that I identified with. I will admit, Frog and Toad aren’t my favorite books, but there is something incredibly astute about them.

Bike ride – A friend passed along bike that his kids had outgrown and one of them was just right for the 4 year old, so we took them out for a bike ride one day. During the pandemic, they closed off one of the major parkways during the weekends and it continues to be closed to cars on weekends and holidays, making for a perfect place to practice riding bikes. We met up wit some friends and biked down to a playground. The Husband has always been anti-training wheels, but I feel like at this point, the 4 year old just wants to keep up with her siblings so giving her training wheels is the best tactic. I’m sure she will outgrow them soon – goals for 2024?

Hallmark Movie Marathon – we did not have an all day movie marathon, but we did do an entire afternoon where we watched two Hallmark movies back to back. I paired this with a decluttering activity and went through all the 11 year olds’ clothes and got rid of the stuff that didn’t fit and made of list of things that she needed. Apparently she has a gazillion t-shirts and only four pairs of pants. (Also – this was my dilemma at one point – is what does a pre-teen wear for a “nice” outfit??? She has fancy recital dresses and t-shirts and hoodies, but nothing in between that she could wear to the theatre or to a nice dinner. We need to figure this one out…) I’ve watched many many Hallmark movies this year… recap coming!

Trip Downtown to visit the U.S. Botanic Gardens and Trains: Every year the trains have a different theme and this year the theme was pollinators – they had all these models of pollinators, constructed from plant and vegetations. Also – we found a great new restaurant. Food now on the National Mall is always hit or miss, so I’m always on the look out for good food options and we found this place called Rice Bar that has customizable noodle and rice bowls. It was really tasty and had lots of vegetables, which is rare for food places down on the Mall. I was really excited to find this place.

New Years: The 11 year old likes to stay up to watch the ball drop, so we did, though the Husband was in bed by 11:30pm and the two little kids were asleep on the couch before midnight as well. Earlier in the day, the Husband made an apple crisp in a cast iron skillet – a super simple recipe, which we proceeded to eat out of the skillet – 5 forks and dig in! On New Years Day, we did some more cleaning and then went for a hike at Great Falls. It was a little rainy and a little chilly, but once we got going, everyone had a great time. The kids invented this game where they were each rulers of rock kingdoms and would gather for summits to discuss world issues. Seeing all three kids play together always feels so special since they are all at such different ages.

So that’s the rundown of the last bit of December into the New Year. I’m sure there are lots of moments I didn’t remember. I had sort of also fallen off the journaling wagon in all the holiday happenings. Something that I want to make sure to made time for again.

Grateful For:
– My mother being here. The kids enjoy having so much grandma time.

-Zoom – so we can talk to family far and wide. We don’t live near any family and we are very bad at keeping in touch. Zoom allows us to be a little less bad at it.

-All the good and love and peace of the holiday season. Health and family and friends.

-The Husband scraping the frost off my car in the morning.

Looking Forward To:
– Filling my planner and new pens. I have several blank planners for 2024 that I’m looking forward to filling. I use the Hobonichi Weeks Mega as my every day planner. Last year I used the Hobonichi Techo Cousin as a journal/habit tracker. I ordered both another Cousin but also the Jibun Techo Lite for journal/tracking this year. Not sure which I’ll use. I like having the pages for each day that the Cousin has, but truthfully, I don’t use every day, so it kind of seems like a waste of a planner. I also ordered a fountain pen sampler from Jetpens. I love the scratchy resistance of the Preppy Fountain Pen that came in my pen sampler last year, so I thought I’d try more fountain pens. Jet Pens only has a black ink fountain pen sampler, and I prefer blue ink, but even still, I’m excited to try them out.

-The 11 year old’s basketball season is starting, so I’m looking forward to cheering her on.

-A few light months of work. I’m taking advantage of not having to be at rehearsal or at the theatre in the evenings to take on some life fun things – for everyone in the family. I’ve encouraged the Husband to sign up for some volunteer work, I’m adding some activities for the kids, and I’m looking into a class for myself too. I feel like while I’m able to be home to drive carpool or watch the kids while the Husband does something for himself, we should take advantage of the time. My job puts such limits on what we can do as a family sometimes that I feel bad, so I’m eager to lean into life things rather than work things for a few months.

-and of course, all the things that 2024 might bring and that I might plan for the year.

What We Ate:
Well, again, since I did really poorly at tracking and journalling this month, I don’t really remember what we ate, but here’s a few memorable dishes:

-Tourtiere for New Year’s Eve Dinner. I’ve made this Canadian meat pie before, and it’s a super cozy meal, which I feel was what the day called for. I used the recipe from the King Arthur’s Baking cook book.

-Egg Curry. One of our new hit recipes from 2023 and a perfect pantry meal. I threw in some kabocha squash as well.

-Congee. I often end up having to throw out leftover rice because I’m never inspired to do anything with it. This time, I decided to make congee with it. I had a loose recipe to start, but then I just started adding whatever I had around – leftover chicken wings from a get together with friends, a bit of that kabocha squash, the last stalks of celery, some jujube berries. It made such a cozy meal. I find kitchen sink meals so satisfying – something about being able to use up the last bit of something in the fridge just makes food taste better to me.

-Chicken Curry in the Instant Pot from Melissa Clark’s Dinner in and Instant. Perfect make ahead meal for Christmas Eve.

-And there was lots of pizza. I think we had at least two or three pizza and movie nights in the past few weeks.

Weekly recap + What We ate: Learning to find the moments even in tech

Well, that last weekend was a very full weekend! And it was followed by a very full week, so I’m posting about a week behind. There has been the time suck of ill children this week, and this post has been sitting languishing in my drafts folders for many many days. But for those of your following along, here’s the run down of life lately….

First off, we hosted the 11 year old’s basketball team for a sleepover. They came over Friday night, we had a build your own pizza station, and they made a huge Thank You Poster for their coach. I think six girls stayed the night. There wasn’t a lot of sleeping. Which I expected. What I didn’t expect (and maybe I should have?) was that most of the girls brought some kind of screen, either a phone or a tablet. So even though I told them to turn their lights out at 11pm and took away the tv remote, they were still up on their devices. I’m torn as to whether or not I should have collected their devices at Lights Out. On the one hand, sleepovers are kind of supposed to be a free for all, but on the other hand, the 11 year old commented to me afterwards how people didn’t really interact as much as she wanted – no one would play Uno with her, for example – because they were all on their screens on looking on to someone else’s screen. I don’t know if next time, I should tell the parents to leave their kids’ screens at home, or to just be stricter about collecting them, or have more organized activities?

After the last kid was picked up, I decided that I needed to get out of the house so we went to a nearby trail for a little walk. It’s not the most picturesque trail, but it was nice to see some signs of spring and the kids liked climbing the rocky outcrop they found.

Then off to work and opening night, which went smoothly. I fee like there was a somewhat collective sigh of relief that we got this show to opening, since last time we did this show, there was a global pandemic and we had to stop before the first onstage orchestra rehearsal. Funny story, there is a sign on a bulletin board in the theatre dated, March 3th, 2020 that encourages mask using. I’m not sure if the memo is left up out of neglect or some odd sense of memorium.

Then daylights savings the next day, which I had completely forgotten about, but somehow the Husband managed to get the two little kids up and to 8:30am mass on time. Daylights savings after a late night is always tough. I was so disoriented when I woke up to a quiet house and a watch that say 8:45am, and a clock that said 9:45am.

The Husband brought the kids home in time for me to bundle them back up and go to skating lessons. After skating lessons, there was a park, then home for lunch. Then we had a family adventure to the outlets to try to find some luggage. We wanted to get the 11 year old her own rolling suitcase for our Spring Break Trip, and we found something for her at the Samsonite store. Of course the two little kids also decided they wanted luggage, but let’s be real, I don’t know that the three year old is going to pull her own rolling suitcase through an airport. So we stopped by Target and got them (relatively) inexpensive rolling suitcases – cheerful luggage that will hopefully last three or four years. I still need to replace my rolling suitcase – it’s well over 20 years old, the wheels have disintegrated and it’s actually probably a little too long to fit in the overhead these days. A project for the weeks to come, I think.

On the way home, the Husband called an audible for dinner and we ended up at Dog Fish Head brewery for dinner, which was a tasty way to finish off the weekend, and a much needed bit of de-stressing since I think we were all cranky and overwhelmed by the shopping. There are just so. many. options. in the world. Then we went home and watched the Oscars.

Anyhow, the week before that very busy weekend was the rest of tech week, which went pretty smoothly. The schedule eased up quite a bit once we started rehearsing with orchestra, and we even had a few days without rehearsal. I know I say this all the time, but I still feel like I’m not great at switching between working 12 hours a day and 2 hours a day. I find I tend to be a slug on lighter work days and then life tasks don’t get done – so trying to find ways to balance the need to slug and the need to get through the list of things that had been put off during tech.

The three year old continued her contributions to science by participating in the trail for the Pfizer booster. It had occurred to me last month that she was eligible for the booster, and when I asked the group that administers the trial if I could go ahead and get her booster, they said I could but then she would have to withdraw from the trial. So… figuring that things were pretty low risk right now, and that the $150 might be nice for her college fund, we decided to wait until the booster trial opened up. That turned out to be a three hour appointment. But she got a cute teddy bear out of it!

Some random thoughts on the Oscars: I didn’t get to watch all of it because bedtime fell right in the middle of everything, but what I did see checked a lot of boxes for glamour, pretty people, and touching thank you speeches that reminded me how powerful public gratitude can be. Some thoughts:
-The clothes! Let’s be real, this is why I watch – I think I’ve seen exactly one of the movies that were nominated. (Tar, for the record) My favorite gown was Cara Delevingne’s huge red dress. I thought it was classic Hollywood glamour on a large scale. And also the Rock in the blush pink satin tuxedo. That made me smile.

It’s a little shiny, but I love the pop of colour in a sea of black.

– The folks who won for Best Live Short, singing happy birthday to one of their stars, James Martin. I mean how awesome is that? You have a global platform and only 45 seconds, and you use it to give your star the gift of two thousand people singing happy birthday?

– A moment that really connected for me was when Ernestine Hipper, who won for Production Design said, “When I started this, I was told – don’t ever forget, you are only as good as your team… ” And it made me think of my awesome colleagues and how I had just had a hard tech week and thank goodness I have a rock solid beyond competent team of stage managers to work with me because they make me look good, and it would have definitely been harder without them.

– Everything, Everywhere, All at Once sweeping the awards. I have yet to see this movie, but I very much want to. I mean how many times will I get to see a movie where the main character wears a print blouse and a puffer vest, just like my grandmother did? So that was lovely, and all the speeches thanking immigrant parents really hit close to home. The Asians who thanked their parents for letting them do what they wanted…

Grateful For:
– A very smooth opening night and the privilege to work on this show.
– Smiling Mind meditations. I’m (still) trying to wean the three year old at night. I’m feeling slightly ridiculous about this, but sometimes it’s the only pathway to sleep. Lately I’ve been able to get her to sleep before she demand “Milk!!!!” by playing a bedtime meditation for her and the six year old after we read books. I’ve been using the app Smiling Mind, an app based out of Australia. I picked it mostly because it is free, but the cute Australia accent is nice to listen to as well. There aren’t a whole lot of options for meditations, but my kids are creatures of habit and listen to the same one over and over again.
– Small moments to savor this week – the little bits of things that let me pause and enjoy being, like…
Golden sunsets on my dinner time run:

Steaming cups of chai. I’ve been making my own chai concentrate at home and enjoying a cup of chai in the afternoons, wrapping my cold hands around the fragrant warmth of the cup of milky brown tea. I find the pre-made chai too sweet for my taste so I started experimenting with making my own. I’m still working out the perfect recipe; I can’t seem to get my chai spicy enough. Currently I’m using cardomon pods, star anise, cinnamon stick, black peppercorn, ginger and tumeric. Maybe more ginger? Maybe grate the ginger?

Packing lunches for the kids. It seems silly to be grateful for such a tedious chore, but after working so many evenings and being gone for bedtime, I felt grateful that I could do this one thing for my kids every day. (Well, not every day. About half the time the 11 year old packs her own lunch.)

For the kids being adorable and cute and at that age when they get a lot of joy out of dressing alike. I had picked up this blue eagle shirt for the six year old a couple of years ago and he looooooves wearing his shirt. “My Robot Eagle Shirt”, he calls it. And he always wears it with red bottoms. I was worried what would happen when he outgrew the shirt, but then I was able to find the shirt one size bigger on Poshmark. Anyhow, now the original shirt has been passed on, and the kids do cute things like this:

This jigsaw puzzle – a soothing opportunity to shift my brain during rehearsal breaks. One of my co-workers brought in this charming puzzle made by Wentworth Wooden Puzzles – the pieces are made of wood and feel so satisfying to click into place, and some of the pieces are shaped like objects. I thought this clipboard was very appropriate for our Stage Management Office.

I’m a beginner puzzler, but I thought this puzzle fantastic!

The clean living room. One day, the 11 year old declined to go out running errands with us, saying that she would stay home and tidy. I was skeptical. But we got home and lo and behold:

Spring. I took a few hours to wander at the botanical gardens one day, to pause and breathe and enjoy the colours of spring.

Looking Forward To:
– Weekday lunch with the Husband. Like a date, almost.
– Time to breathe and work on all the things that get put off during tech.
– My brother and his family are coming to visit this summer! It’s a couple months away, but we haven’t seen them in a while, so I’m excited to see them.

What We Ate:

Saturday: I brought at hummus and cucumer sandwich to work. The Husband made pizza for movie night. I think they watched The Good Dinosaur.

Sunday: The Husband and kids had dumplings. I had Green Room chicken – as in there was a catered event at the theatre next door, which my friend was working. There was too much food leftover, so my friend brought it over and I had chicken and rice and salad for dinner.

Monday: The Husband made waffles with sauteed mushrooms for the kids. I packed ramen to eat at work.

Tuesday: Roasted Garlic Potato Soup from Family by Hetty McKinnon. Made before I went to work and was able to take myself a thermos full. The kids said this was bland, but the Husband and I thought it was tasty. Actually the best part was the salty paprika garlic almonds that the recipe calls for as a garnish. Vegan.

Wednesday: Vegetarian Jap chae. A kitchen sink, clean out the fridge meal. Vegan.

Thursday: Veggie quiche, made before I went to work. Another attempt to use up veggies in the fridge.

Friday: Pizza/ basketball team sleepover.

Saturday: Leftovers for me. The Husband and kids had pizza (homemade, I think?) and watched Frozen.

Sunday: Dog Fish Head Brewery. I had nachos and the ahi tuna sandwich. It all felt very indulgent.

Weekly recap + what we ate: rituals and whimsy

This was the first week where I’ve really noticed the trees donning their Autumn colours. First a faint swipe of colour here and there, like blush among the green and then towards the end of the week, brilliant red and gold trees. Some trees I saw while out on my lunch time walk:

This past weekend on my day off, I took the kids and my father on a hike to Weverton Cliffs. The five year old had requested, “A hike to a view” as his weekend activity, and Weverton Cliffs came up in my search as very kid friendly. The hike was about two miles out and back hike, and though there was a bit of an elevation gain, the switchbacks made it all very manageable; all three kids walked the whole way – I didn’t have to carry anyone! I feel like 3 miles is the limit for the baby these days. And indeed at the top, we were rewarded with a view. And also some hot chocolate, as one child said that they would not go hiking unless there was hot chocolate. The weather was actually a little warm for hot chocolate, but I think we enjoyed the decadence of having hot chocolate while gazing out on this:

There wasn’t quite enough fall colour to make it seem like this was our “Fall Folliage” hike, but the view was breathtaking nonetheless.

Something I read that made me think this week:
– This article from Barking Up the Wrong Tree, about the power of rituals. There seems to be a fine line between rituals, routines, and habits, but one distinction that the article makes is that rituals are not necessarily practical actions – that is to say a morning exercise routine has a tangible function, but crossing yourself and praying before every meal does not. The interesting point of the article makes, though, is that rituals, even if they don’t have tangible outcomes, do have a huge psychological function. Rituals help anchor chaotic times; they can provide concrete actions in times of anxiety.

There is a great example of how the tennis player Rafael Nadal has all these rituals during a tennis match – from only stepping over lines with his right foot, to making sure his game ID is face up on the bench to squeezing his energy gel exactly four times before he consumes it. These rituals may seem like ticks, but really they are ways for him to create order in his environment. He is quoted from his memoir:
“Some call it superstition, but it’s not. If it were superstition, why would I keep doing the same thing over and over whether I win or lose? It’s a way of placing myself in a match, ordering my surroundings to match the order I seek in my head.“

I was thinking about my life currently, and I don’t think there are many rituals in my day to day. We do say grace before dinner. When I’m stage managing a performance, I have certain things I like to write in my notebook during the half hour before a performance… Aside from that, I can’t think of any rituals that don’t feel like they have a practical purpose. For example, I put my work ID in the exact same spot in my bag the minute I leave work – it is a routine action, but is it a ritual? The practical aspect is that it keeps me from losing my keys. On the other hand, it is a transitional gesture, to signal the end of the work day, so there is indeed an air of ritual about it.

Anyhow, the article made me think about what times in my day would a ritual be helpful for me to create an inner calm amidst chaos – mornings. evenings. before big chorus rehearsals. Tech. Holidays. Travel. In one of the studies the article cited, researchers had subjects perform a ritual involving sprinkling salt and crumpling up paper before they had to sing a big solo. They found that subjects who did this seemingly pointless gesture performed more accurately. So maybe I need to find my own version of salt sprinkle/paper crumple to incorporate into my mornings? I am intrigued by the idea.

Fun things:
-I rode my bike to work. Friday morning, I was going to try to fit in a run before work since we started at 10:30a, then I realized that I could instead get on my bike, get my exercise and commute at the same time and it seemed like that best idea I’d had all week. It’s a 4.9 mile bike ride and takes about half an hour, which is ten minutes longer than taking the metro, but much more fun in the crisp autumn air, especially after having several dreary rainy days. I will admit there is a couple blocks that go uphill and I did get off and walk the bike; hopefully if I ride my bike more I’ll be able to ride up that block soon. After work, I biked to the park and met up with my friend who had picked up the two little kids from school and we played in the playground until it was time to go home for dinner.

-We did not go apple picking last weekend, but we did stop at a farm stand that had many many many different kinds of apples. We bought one of every variety, but didn’t keep straight which was what so I can’t go back and stock up on the varieties that I like the best. For the record, I like crisp apples that are a combination of sweet and sour – apples that crunch when I bite into them. Turns out the apples from Spicknall’s stand are the same price as they would be if we had indeed gone apple picking. I might have to re-evaluate the value of apple picking. Of course our favorite apple picking place has a goats and chickens and a playground, so I guess it is probably more about the event than the fruit.

-We’ve started rehearsal for our next show. One day, mid week, our director emailed me, saying she was cleaning out her son’s closet and did I want some toys that he had outgrown. “Sure!” I said. The next day she brought in a bin full of train tracks and a Lego robot. Now, I have always had an adverse reaction to train tracks and Legos. I know everyone sees creative open ended toys that are fabulous for the imagination. I see tiny pieces that I will have to pick up, or (in the case of Legos) that I will step on, causing excruciating pain. In my ideal world, all toys would be formed to be one single piece, preferably larger than my fist, and with no bits or bobs that will fall off. At any rate, I do fully recognize that these train tracks and robots will send my kids into toy heaven, so I am grateful for the hand me downs.
I put the bin of train tracks in the Stage Management office, and when I came back at the end of rehearsal, this is what I found:

Apparently a box of train tracks could not be resisted by the other stage managers. Over the week, the train set us has grown and morphed, been disassembled and reassembled. We are playing. Seeing the joy people are finding in assembling wooden paths has made me realize that we don’t play enough. We come in and work with great intensity, yet I think there is something that could be incredibly useful in having a trainset in the office. It invites us to shift our brains to something else for a little while and work together. I mean we always work together – I think that’s one of my favorite things about my colleagues is that there is no one I don’t work well with – but building train routes together is a whole other way of working together – kind of whimsical and relaxed. It is a shame our office at the theatre is too small for train tracks. Maybe I need to find something whimsical and fun but compact. A jigsaw puzzle, perhaps?

What we ate: Two soup nights this week – it’s the easiest thing to make ahead in the InstantPot when there is a lot going on in the evenings. In trying to stick to making two vegan dinners a week, I was trying to branch out from the usual bean soups, and I found two soups that were pretty tasty.

Saturday: Take out from one of our favorite restaurants, a Burmese place that had closed briefly during the pandemic but is now open again for take out. Hooray!

Sunday: The Husband and I had date night – that is to say we went grocery shopping together while my mom watched the kids, then had early dinner at a deli. The ten year old made frozen tortellini with red sauce for her siblings.

Monday: Wild Rice Mushroom soup in the InstantPot – It’s a basketball night, so I needed to make something that would be ready to eat when the Husband and kids got home. Vegan.

Tuesday: The Husband cooked. Something involving eggplant. I worked late and had leftover Burmese take out for dinner.

Wednesday: Zucchini pancakes from Bare Minimum Dinners. Such a simple idea – grate two zucchinis, mix up a batch of pancakes from mix (I used Kodiak), add the zucchini and onion powder and some chopped herbs ( cilantro, mint, parsley was what I had on hand) to the mix. I also made some tzatziki on the side and we ate it with chopped up carrots.

Thursday: Pumpkin Lasagna Soup in the Instant Pot. Another activity heavy evening, so I made dinner ahead of time to be ready when folks got home. I was a little skeptical of the recipe, but it sounded interesting – a pumpkin soup with half a cup of tomato sauce and coconut milk and chickpeas and lasagna noodles. It turned out to be really really tasty. vegan.

Friday: Pizza (takeout) and Cool Runnings. I had never seen this 1993 movie about the Jamaican Bobsled team, and it came up in a list of family friendly movies under 100 mins, the time limit being important because we were having a late start to movie night. The movie is highly fictionalized but even still, it is delightful, funny, and inspiring – kind of a perfect family movie night film.

Seasonal Fun lists, regrets, and Fall Aspirations

My first glimpse of Fall colour this year – at Mont Royal in Montreal in AUGUST!!!

Today is officially Fall!

Earlier this month, I was thinking about all the “Summer Fun Lists” I see around the internet and, conversely this article “Our Biggest Regrets from this Summer “ on Slate. I certainly did not do all the activities on my summer fun list, but I did a lot of them. As I watch the last rays of summer fade, I realized that while there are certainly things I did not get to, I don’t really regret not doing them. I think of my Summer List as a brain dump of all the possible fun things to do between mid-June and September, and I don’t have to do them all; I can chose things off the list that suit my mood and situation at any given time. There is no Bingo prize for checking all the boxes. Certainly there are things on the summer list that do require advance planning – travel, seeing friends, activities that require tickets – but many things do not. And being a planning resistant person, I find that it really helps me clarify my priorities to see what I’m willing to put in the effort to plan for or even do on a whim.

Take, for example, my monthly mom’s group happy hour. I’m the one who plans these for my mom’s group, and it usually goes on the calendar three weeks out. I very rarely plan things that far in advance. Of course there are things that go on the calendar that far out, but these are the immovable things that are set by others – swim meets, rehearsal and performance dates, summer camp, etc. My mom’s group happy hour is one of the rare things that I will actively make plans for – I send out a doodle poll for dates and venue suggestions, pick the date and venue, make reservations, tell my Husband so he can plan to be home with the kids that night. It seems like a lot of work, but I feel like mom’s group happy hour is a priority – I love seeing these moms and swapping stories about poop.

The things on my list that I decide to do last minute or the day before – it’s not really a question of priority – it’s just that I think the priority during the summer is to get out and enjoy the sunshine, so any one of a variety of activities will do. I feel so lucky that there are so many wonderful adventures to have near me that can be pulled off impulsively, so there will always be worthwhile and beautiful things to do. As Oliver Burkeman notes in 4000 Weeks – once one realizes the finite nature of life, one can let go of the infinite possibilities and focus on those things that one actually chooses to do.

Last year, we tried to complete the Maryland Ice Cream Trail, and were a little bummed not to get to all ten creameries on the list and vowed to complete it this year. But you know what? We only made it to two of the ten this year, and I’m fine with that. We still had tasty ice cream. Last year we went to three creameries in one day in our quest and that was arguably not a great move. A great memory, but still… regrettable in other ways.

Alright, now that I think of it, I do have one summer regret – I regret signing the ten year old up for County camp. She didn’t love it (apparently the kids were mean) and it was a bit of a schlep for me. Of course hindsight is 20/20 because she loved the camp last year – but this year, I guess it was a different group of kids. At any rate, now I know and I think next year, we will do fewer weeks of camp. Perhaps over winter break I will have her come up with a list of all the possible things she might be interested in doing and then.

I’m not saying there aren’t other things that I wish I had done more of or less of this summer, but I don’t think I had a summer to regret.

Having said all that, Here are some thoughts and aspirations for Fall, roughly (if not technically) between now and Thanksgiving.

Hallowe’en Costumes. I love making Hallowe’en costumes. Last year’s Millenium Falcon was certainly epic for me. This year, however, the two littles wanted to be something that was going to be far simpler to just buy. The ten year old, however, has a more creative idea in mind. I think she was a little disappointed that she couldn’t top her brother’s Millenium Falcon last year (but honestly, what could?). So this year she has an idea that will be a lot of fun and involves cardboard. Or maybe foam core. We’ll see.

Carve a Jack-o’-Lantern, or two or three. I love pumpkin carving. I’m actually working on Hallowe’en this year, so I’ll have to pre-game. Maybe I should also come up with an appropriate costume to wear backstge?

Another round of attic clean out. Finally work up the heart to get rid of the baby stuff.

Apple Picking. If not apple picking then at least apple sauce and apple pie.

Fall Camping. Given my lack of two day weekends this one is very very aspirational.

Hiking in fall colour. Hopefully once a month. By the looks of this fall foliage predicator, it seems like peak colour with happen in our area around the end of October. The Husband is taking the kids to New York to meet up with my parents that weekend, and since that is tech week, I won’t be going. However…. that means that I will have a day off my myself, so I think I will plan a hike on that free day. Or maybe even a bike ride. There are also lots of hikes and activities that our County Parks department sponsors. They always look really interesting and informative, so I want to see if any will fit in our schedule.

Celebrate the baby’s birthday. This is actually this weekend. I didn’t get it together to plan a party, but we have family in town and we will have cake and balloons (shhh… this last will be a surprise). And she got to pick her breakfast cereal at the grocery store this week, a tradition in our household. She picked Fruity Pebbles.

Go to the Theatre. This one is practically done. I have tickets for Hamilton this weekend, purchased four months ago. I never plan theatre (or anything, really) that far out in advance, but last spring I decided that I wanted to take the two older kids so I went ahead and bought the tickets. I did kick myself later because I didn’t double check my dates – it’s the baby’s birthday weekend plus the kids have Monday off school, so maybe we could have taken a bigger family adventure. Oh well.
Hamilton aside, there’s a lot of other really interesting theatre happening near us – this production of Beauty and the Beast looks to be unconventional and awesome.

Survive Tech Week. Keep practicing good habits and making sure I stay human and don’t become a theatre zombie during a tech process that I might be dreading a teeny tiny bit.

Fix the Storm Door. The glass on the storm door got broken by a child a few weeks ago. It’s a pretty old door so will need to be replaced, I think.

Make progress towards ordering window treatments for the living room. We’ve had a stop gap solution in place for a while since our curtain rod broke. It involves sheers and some too-small black panels. I would like to take a step or two towards having proper window treatments in place again.

Ziplining with the ten year old. I had planned on taking her this summer, but it was just too hot, so we put it off until Fall.

Cozy Kitchen Adventures. Who says Fall Adventures have to mean leaving the house? Fall is the start of “hunker and carbs” season. I do want to make something in my Bundt pan since my last attempt was such a wet goopy fail.

Watch some recent movies. Cooler weather means hunkering and watching movies is a good way to hunker. I’m not always able to stay awake for a full movie these days, but there are some that I really want to stay awake for. I am super excited by this adaptation of on of my favorite books as a child, Catherine Called Birdy. AND the ten year old has read this book, so we can watch it together. Also Fire Island has been on my Watchlist all summer. It’s a gay Asian re-telling of Pride and Prejudice, and all of that is just my catnip.

Happy Hour with my mom’s group. A lot of the parents in this group prefer outdoor meet ups so I definitely want to get a few more Happy Hours in before the weather gets too chilly.

Happy Hour with fellow Stage Managers. There has been a seismic shift in the stage management staff at work this past year and it’s made me realize that I really value the my co-workers as human beings, not just as people I work with. The thought of not seeing them at all this opera season makes me a little sad, so I would love to arrange something.

Free Days that are restorative and fulfilling. Given that I’m working every weekend between next week and the middle of November, I don’t know how many of the Fall weekend specific things I’ll manage to get to – things such as Fall Festivals and Special Fall Events. Since I generally only have one day off a week, I really want to guard that time and spend it on what matters. I’ve been thinking about this lately – how to spend my one precious free day. When I have chaotic and hectic free days, I don’t feel at all ready to go back to work. A good free day needs to be a good combination of life tasks and family tasks and personal tasks and leisure tasks and social time and rest. Which seems like a lot to ask of just one day. So maybe I need to pick three of those categories each free day, with rest always being one of the choices.

Shenandoah camping – Day two

One thing about camping with two small kid and no other adult is that when one kid wakes up at 6:30am and needs to use the restroom, you have to wake up the other kid as well because you can’t very well leave a sleeping toddler in a tent by themself. I know I should just instruct the five year old in the fine art of peeing in the woods- that would be the simplest solution. Yet, the mechanics of peeing while standing up still baffle me a little and everytime we try, pee goes all over. This instruction might be something I assign to the Husband.

At any rate early morning bathroom call was how the day began. A little earlier than I had wanted since the sleep the night before had been not terribly restful, as is typical for the first night of camping. But bladder and sunlight and a natural early riser meant that at 6:30am there was a bathroom run. And then we were up for the day.

We came back from the bathroom and I made everyone oatmeal from the musli that I had made while looking over trail maps to decide what I thought might be fun to do with the kids.

After breakfast we walked along a trail next to our campground that led to tbe campstore – I guess one could call it hiking, but it seemed more like a relaxes nature stroll. The path we took was part of the Appalachian Trail, which was kind of a cool thought- that we could get on this trail and walk south to Georgia or North to Maine. This stretch was pretty unremarkable, a path through the woods though we did see rocks and sticks and acorn, which the baby demanded that I put in my pocket to take home. And there was a millipede which the kids found fascinating. The first of many we would see.

Trail explorers along the Appalachian Trail.

We got to the campstore just as the misty rain became a downpour. In a bit of unfortunate oversight, I had left our hats, umbrellas and rain gear back at the camp site, so we just waited in the covered alleyway outside the campstore for the storm to pass. I felt ill equipped for this kind of waiting it out, but I did have a sack full of trail mix, water, and, in a bit of luck, a deck of BrainQuest cards. This last kept the kids occupied for a little bit, but then they spent the rest of the time running back and forth.

Eventually, after about an hour, the downpour lightened to a mist and we walked back to the campsite, and had lunch. To keep the kids occupied while I made lunch, I set up the hammock for them, including the rain fly in case it were to rain again. They always have great fun with the hammock- fun for swinging but also fun for lazing around.

After lunch was eaten and cleaned up, I decided to join them in the hammock to see if the baby would take a nap. Well, we all ended up asleep. I think that’s one of the lovely things about camping- the sleepless, restless first night is always offset by a lovely afternoon nap. I woke up about an hour later to the sound of rain tapping against the rain fly. Somewhere in the back of my head I remembered that I had left the windows to the car open in an effort to air the car out. This thought kept wafting into my groggy nap brain, but it was so hard to pull myself out of the gentle lull of a swinging hammock full of warm child snuggles!

In a fit of superhuman strength I untangled myself from the kids, went to shut the car windows and returned to the hammock. I spent another half hour reading The Splendid and the Vile among a tangle of children’s limbs until they woke up and reminded me of my promise to buy firewood and make a fire that evening. We got into the car and headed back to the camp store. After getting two bundles of wood, i decided there was still enough time in the day to sneak in a quick hike, so I drove us to the trailhead for Blackrock summit.

My guidebook said this was an easy hike with a rocky scramble to a great view. The baby has never met a rocky scramble that she didn’t like, so it sounded perfect. Plus the hike was only a mile long so it was just the right length for a late afternoon adventure.

The baby complained most of the way up the trail, (“I’m tired,” “My tummy hurts!”) but the moment she saw the rocky scramble at the top, she was happily off like a shot. The summit looks like a pile of construction rubble debris, but the placard at the trail head said that it was actually a rock shelf at the bottom of the ocean, when this area was an ocean. The ocean receded and eventually the rock shelf collapsed.

I know everyone is always amazed by their children, but I am truly in awe of how well the baby can climb- she looks at the situation, and plots where her toes and fingers can go and how to wedge her foot in just so to get leverage. She lifts with her legs and isn’t afraid to blindly drop to a lower level. It is so much fun to watch.

After our hike we went back to the campsite and had dinner and a little fire. I have become okay at making a fire, but I’m always surprised when it does work. My method mostly consists of making fire starters from newspaper and dryer lint and wood shavings. (the Husband, who does the laundry, saves dryer lint all year in a Ziploc bag so that I can have it for when I go camping). The weather had been so wet and rainy, so I didn’t really have any good twigs and branches to use for kindling. Surprisingly the fire still managed to catch rather quickly. I wanted to save the marshmallows and s’mores for when the ten year old and the Husband arrived the next day, so we just enjoyed the flickering flames

The fire eventually died down, I cleaned up dinner, we brushed our teeth, got into pjs, read the rest of The Enormous Crocodile, and then went to bed. It was only about 9:45p when everyone settled down to sleep, which was late for the kids but early for me. Clearly being in the woods without internet does wonders for my ability to go to bed early. I did stay up another half and hour to read and journal, but even still I was asleep much earlier than usual.

When I was planning this trip, I was a little nervous when I saw the rain in the forecast, but looking back, it didn’t end up being a big deal. Luckily we have good gear so we all stayed dry and the rain was pretty sporadic- two 90 minute showers. The rest of the day was mild and not so hot. I think the nice thing about camping is that I feel like I’m either having leisure time (book and hammock or hike) or doing essential things (feeding kids); there isn’t empty time or puttering time or aimless time. Having my time be black and white like that – relax with purpose or survival – takes away a lot of the restlessness I can feel when there are a billion small tasks to be done. While camping, I don’t have to think about activity registration or paying the bills or making social plans, or fixing that thing that needs to fixed (or thinking about fixing it…)… because I can’t tick those things off my to do list right then. I can think and plan, but the number of things that are actually achievable is actually quite limited.

Even though the time is filled and every tasks has many more steps than at home, somehow, I don’t feel busy. Having to unpack the camp stove for every meal, having to wash all the dishes right away, and then haul the dirty water to the bath house, having to put away all the food completely for fear of bears – that doesn’t feel busy to me. It is just essential. I think busy comes from feeling like there is soooo much to do that I am just going from one task to another, and it will never get done. Yet when camping there is just two things – enjoy being outside and feed everyone (Okay, there is also bathroom call and brush teeth, I suppose) – it doesn’t feel like I won’t get things done. Because of course we will eat. And then of course we will relax or go for a hike.

I once went camping with a friend and in the middle of one afternoon, while I was sitting reading a book, she came over and said to me, “It’s amazing how there is really nothing to do here.” And I thought, “Yes, isn’t that the beauty of it?”

Weekly recap + what we ate: Spring Break II

Now that I’m peering into summer, no better time to finish my Spring Break recap. Hah! It’a little getaway we took back before rehearsals even began…

Immediately after my brother and his family visited for their spring break, was the ten year old’s own spring break. I don’t think I quite appreciated how flexible one could be with vacation before the oldest started school. Now most of our vacations have to be planned around school holidays. I guess they don’t have to be, but too many missed days of school and we get the administrative side eye. We did pull the ten year old from school the Friday before Spring break so that we could pack in a little trip before I started work the next week.

There is a program that gives every fourth grader in America a free National Parks Pass for a year. I had signed the ten year old up for last September, but I’m a little abashed to admit that we have yet to take advantage of it. It expires in August, so I thought we should plan some trips around visiting National Parks. I had managed to get a couple days off work for the first half of the ten year old’s Spring Break, so the Husband found a nice place on Airbnb next to the Smoky Mountains and off we went.

Since my parents were coming with us, we rented a minivan to drive down. I have long resisted a mini van, but seeing as how I’m driving a nineteen year old car, we have started to think as to whether a van might indeed be an option for our next car. The verdict – definitely a more comfortable ride for everyone and the amount of space for luggage is pretty great. But…. the Husband declared we are not getting a mini van until the kids are out of their “must push the buttons” phase, given the arguments and tears that ensued over who got to push the button to close the sliding doors, not to mention the number of times that one of the kids managed to, in their eagerness to push buttons, closed a door on someone trying to get in the van. Plus my parking lot at work is tiny.

At any rate, back to our trip. We left at 7am – the Husband had wanted to leave at 6am, but that didn’t happen. As is our road trip tradition, we stopped at McDonalds for breakfast. We didn’t make many stops – just one for lunch and once for gas, and arrived at our place around 5:30pm. We were greeted by a cozy yet spacious cabin in the mountains with a stunning view of the Smokies as well as a hot tub.

It was actually quite cold when we got to our Airbnb. In fact, there were snow flurries that afternoon. But even the snow couldn’t hide what a great view we had from the back deck of the cabin:

We settled in that evening – the kids were super excited to explore a new dwelling and there was even a pool table for them to try out. Since it was Friday night, we had our pizza and movie night – picking up pizza from Pizza Hut and streaming Seeing Red – which was a pretty awesome movie. The film is set in Toronto and my parents had lived there when they were newly arrived in Canada, so that was one things that made the movie particularly fun.

The next day promised rain, so we decided to visit the Tuckalechee Caverns, which were just down the road. The caverns were breathtaking and I loved seeing all the different shapes and sizes of rock formations, and hearing the guide explaining what causes rocks to form one way as opposed to another. It was also really amazing how they had set up all these lights in the caverns so people could really see the different formations. At one point, though, the guide turned out the light so we could see how absolutely dark it was in the caverns. Being plunge into darkness made me think of the two boys – one just six years old – who discovered the caverns – back in a time when there weren’t the powerful flashlights that we have today. What an adventure it must have been for those two kids! Scary, too, I bet. One of those boys who discovered the caverns still owns the caverns to this day. When I walked in to buy our tickets, the man behind the counter asked where I was from. I told him and then I asked whether he was from the area.

“Yes I am,” he said. “Born here. In fact, by grandpa was one of the boys who discovered the caverns.” And he pointed with his thumb to an elderly man sitting behind the fudge counter a few feet over. A family business.

This was one of my favorite formations – I love the way the water and sediment flowed to, over millions of years, create a rock that almost looks like a rippling piece of fabric.

There was also a waterfall and what was known as the “beach” where the water was so clean from being filtered through all the rock and sediment from the surface that one could drink it. In fact, the guide told us, locals often come and pay the owner of the caverns so that they can fill their water jugs from the water in the caverns.

After returning from the caverns, the Husband and I went to the next town over to buys some groceries and to just sit for a while in a coffee shop. It was nice to get away for a little while. After dinner that night, we tried enjoyed a stunning sunset and then, while the kids tried to figure out how to play pool, the Husband and I tried out the hot tub… it was nice, but I don’t know that hot tubs are really my things. Something about sitting around in hot water seems so passive. Which, I guess might be the point of the hot tub as a relaxing activity.

The next day we all went on a hike. The hike we had wanted to go on proved to have no parking at the trailhead, so we drove on and found another hike. There are many to be had in the Smoky Mountains. Oh also, ironically, even though we were very eager to use our park pass and that was the whole reason we picked Smoky Mountain National Park in the first place… turns out you don’t need to pay to get in to the park. At any rate, the hike that we went on, passed a cemetery, with some very interesting names to be found, also the heartbreak of infant mortality.

But after the cemetery, we admittedly trudged on feeling a little uninspired by the trail we picked. It was mostly just trees and shrubs and very little shade or pretty views. I mean trees and shrubs are all fine and well, but the original hike we had wanted to go on promised the opportunity to venture behind a waterfall. So this trail of just trees and shrubs seemed honestly kind of a let down. But presently we ran into someone hiking the opposite direction. He mentioned something about how coming back was easier than getting there.

“How far did you go?” we asked.

“I went all the way to the waterfall,” he said.

A waterfall! Well, that was a bit of motivation to keep going. So we continued on. We stopped at a flat rock next to the stream to eat our packed lunch- sandwiches, fruit, cucumbers, carrots, and cookies. And then after clambering down a rocky path….

We spent the next little while climbing over rocks and traversing logs, and half heartedly trying to not get too wet.

On the way back, the baby got a little fussy.. she had hiked quite a while, so it was to be expected. I had forgotten to bring the baby carrier in my backpack. (This carrier, by the way, which I love because it packs up super small and light yet can still be used for my 30 lb toddler. It’s not the most comfortable for hours and hours, but it’s perfect to throw in the backpack for those moment when she’s walked two miles and is ready to quit.). So, finding myself without a carrier, I decided to improvise. I had the Jane Eyre wrap that my friend had given me, so I tied the ends together and threw the loop over one shoulder to make an sling and it worked better than I had thought.

After that hikes, we came back to our airbnb and there was soup waiting for us in the slow cooker. We had stopped to pick up some garlic bread- the freezer kind. Actually two different freezer kinds so we could have a taste test. After dinner, the Husband and I tried out the hot tub while the kids tried to figure out how to play pool.

The next day we went in the opposite directions toward the “quiet side” of the Smokies to visit Cade’s Cove, which is a valley amidst the Smokies that is full of hiking trails and the remnants of historic European settlements. There is an eleven mile loop that you can drive that takes you to these various buildings and trails. We started to hike the Trail to Abrams Falls, but the entire loop was five miles and, hiking with little kids, one kind of has to go at their pace so we didn’t make it to the Falls. Even though we did not get to see Abrams Falls, we did some really fun rock scrambling and sat by the river, watching the water tumble by.

I swear this child is half mountain goat.

I also loved seeing on this hike signs of spring among the bare trees of winter:

When we got back to the car, we continued driving along the Cade’s Cove loop and stopped at the Visitor’s Center. I had packed sandwiches, fruit, and chips and we tailgated in the parking lot, next to a big open field. The kids took the opportunity to stretch their legs and run across the vast expanse of grass:

Next to the Visitor’s Center was a collection of buildings from the European settlers. I always find this kind of thing fascinating, to wander historic houses and imagine what people’s lives were like and how they came to settle the land, and also about the Native Americans who came before them. I especially liked this water mill that still runs and the trough of water that was built to carry water to it, long before days of plastic and silicone waterproofing.

After the visitor’s center we continued along the Cades Cove loop, stopping to check out various historical buildings. I had bought a slim guidebook at the Visitors Center and read outloud the history of certain buildings.

Dinner that night was barbeque at a charming place called Full Service BBQ. I’m guessing it’s called Full Service because it’s located in a converted gas station. It was a pretty great little place, you can read about it below!

The next morning we piled back into the car, stopped for breakfast, and drove home. All in all it was a nice getaway. A little too short- I would have liked to have had some more time just to ait on the porch swing and breathe in the mountain air and mist, but I’m glad we packed in some good hiking adventures.

Some things that kept us entertained during the ten hour drive:

– audiobooks. We listened to The Golden Compass, Book One of His Dark Materials by Philip Pullman. It was a full cast audiobook, which I sometimes find can make for disjointed listening. I still don’t fully grasp all the theoretical aspects of Pullman’s book, but he manages to wrap it in some thrilling adventures and interesting characters, so I don’t mind not understanding everything.

– I got the kids Boogie Boards as an alternative to handing them screens for the whole trip. They seemed to like them well enough, though they were constantly dropping the pens, which was annoying. When we stopped at a restaurant on the way home, we beoight the boogie boards and played Exquisite Corpse, which was kind of funz

– drawing pictures on my iPad. I haven’t done any drawing since my drawing class last year and I really miss taking the time to think about a drawing assignment and putting it on paper. i got a pen for my iPad with the thought of exploring some digital drawing programs. So on a couple of particularly long lengths of the drive I thought I’d try my hand at drawing on the tablet. I have to say, prefer the tension and resistance that I get when using real paper, and also the imperfection of not being able to instantly erase thing. The colours seem too bold on my digital pictures.

The view from the passenger seat- dashbord

What We Ate, the Airbnb/ Spring Break

Friday: Pizza Hut and Seeing Red.

Saturday: pasta and meatballs with salad and garlic bread. Because we didn’t want to buy too many ingredients, this meal was entirely from pre-made components. We got meatballs from the meat aisle and a jar of marinara. Also had a bag of salad on the side. I thought it was a pretty easy meal to throw together.

Sunday: Mushroom Farro soup. The Airbnb had a slow cooker, so I made a soup in the morning (loosely based off this recipe) and it was ready for us when we got back from a long day of hiking. We picked up some garlic bread to pop in the oven and eat on the side and it was a pretty great meal.

Monday: Barbeque at Full Service BBQ – a BBQ place that was housed in a converted gas station. The seating was outdoors, and they had bubbles and hula hoops and chalk for the kids to play with while we waited for our food. I had the ribs with a side of braised green beans and they were really tasty. However, the most intriguing item on the menu for me was the “purple drank” which was a combination of grape and peach Kool-Aid. The ten year old ordered it; I had a sip of hers and was immediately transported back to my childhood when my brother and I would mix up large pitchers of Kool-Aid on a hot summer day, the sugary taste of the drink, like candy in a pourable form. It was simultaneously a sugar bomb and nostalgia shot.

Weekly recap + what we ate: Nor yet the thing he’d planned

It’s my last week before I start work again, so I feel like the week has been a combination of trying to tie up loose ends and trying to stop and savor unfettered time. Well, somewhat fettered to the demands of a toddler.

I’m excited/ nervous to be going back to work and excited to be working on a show again. I know I worked on opera last summer, but something about going back to my home company where I’ve been for almost fifteen years feels different. It feels like things are back on track somehow. Hopefully we’ll all remember how to function.

The weather towards the end of the week was going to be rainy, so I tried to get in some good outdoor time in early in the week.

On Sunday the two little kids and I went on another of the hikes led by a naturalists at one of our Nature Centers. It was certainly cold – mid 20s. I thought that the hike would be cancelled for the cold, but when it wasn’t, I put the kids in their warm underwear and bundled them up. (Or rather, I threw their winter gear in a bag and took that too the car. This is my latest mom hack – since the kids can’t wear their puffy coat in the car anyway, I just keep coats, hats and gloves in a large bag and take that bag back and forth to the car. Seems easier to keep track of everything that way.)

We were the only family to show up for the hike. Apparently there were originally ten families signed up, but they all dropped out one by one. I was skeptical as to how long we would make it, given the cold weather, but our hike guide brought hand warmers and kept things moving and interesting and we managed to stay out for an hour and a half. We saw lots of geese and wrens and ducks, threw rocks on the frozen lakes, explored the chimney remnants from and old house, and collected pine cones and sycamore seed balls. Afterwards, the naturalist made us hot chocolate which we enjoyed in the nature center while watching the bald eagle cam live feed from Georgia.

Monday the baby and I went for a walk along the C&O Canal. The morning light over the Potomac was beautiful, and we sat on some rocks watching the ice flow down the river, the air periodically punctured by the loud cracking of ice breaking down below. There was scant snow on the ground, but there were some really beautiful ice patterns to be seen. The baby was a little grumpy at first, but then we wandered down to the banks of the river and she got to take part in one of her favorite things – throwing rocks in the river.

I also thought this was fascinating: I stumbled over what at first seemed like a thick cord of roots, but then upon closer examination saw that it was a cable, the brown rust of it melding perfectly into the dirt. I wonder what it was from!

The ten year old had Tuesday off school. I had promised that she could go skating with her friend, but when her friend couldn’t make it, we went any way. At first I was just going to watch, but the person at the skate counter told me that kids 2 and under could skate for free, so I asked the baby if she wanted to try, and she said yes. So baby’s first skate! I realize that I should have had her in a helmet and gloves… mental note for next time. I was sure she was going to hate it, but she’s already said she wants to go again.

Tuesday afternoon and evening I also had a supertitle gig for a vocal recital. On the dinner break between the rehearsal and the performance, I met up with a friend for a walk. It also was Lunar New Year, and the Kennedy Center had a beautiful light display up to celebrate. My friend and I wandered outside to see the lanterns at such a perfect moment when the sun was starting to set, making the sky all swirly pink. The contrast between Mother Nature’s and Man’s lighting display was breathtaking.

The recital itself was lovely. There was one piece in Russian, which was an interesting challenge. Thank goodness for Google. As I was preparing the supertitle slides, I saw that the second half of the recital was a new song cycle based on the poems of Edna St. Vincent Millay, one of my favorite poets. The poems that the composer used were new to me, and I loved one in particular – “If Still Your Orchard Bears“. It talks about the timeless nature of regret and pain, how all people must endure it. An excerpt:

Should at that moment the full moon
Step forth upon the hill,
And memories hard to bear at noon,
By moonlight harder still,
Form in the shadow of the trees, –
Thing that you could not spare
And live or so you thought, yet these
All gone, and you still there,
A man no longer what he was
Nor yet the thing he’d planned.

I had a realization on Friday that this would be my last time on my own with a baby without childcare for a while… maybe ever? My mother comes next week to help watch her and then she might be in daycare come summer. It’s all very bittersweet, but I feel really lucky to have had this time with her. Of all the kids, I’ve spent the most time at home with this third one, thanks to the pandemic. Even though I was back at work five days after she was born, she was only six months old when the pandemic hit and we’ve been joined at the hip since, give or take seven weeks last summer and a few nights since then.

This week was particularly exhausting with her. I think it was partly that the weather was really rainy so we couldn’t spend as much time outside as possible, also partly that I had two days with two kids at home and I’ve forgotten how constant having more than one kid at home is. And also I’ve been trying to get some last minute things done before I start back at work, so I’ve had to split my attention more than usual.

One day, the baby kept asking to paint, so I set her up with paper and paints and a paintbrush at the kitchen table and figured I could set up my computer at the other end of the table and get the bills paid. Not so much. I think it took two hours to pay the bills; usually it takes fifteen minutes.

I was listening to this episode of Death, Sex, and Money titled “A Season to Savor” where Anna Sales talks about the importance of taking time to savor things. Savoring was one of the assignments in the “Science of Well Being” course that I took online last year, but I think I had somewhat drifted from doing it intentionally. There is a line in my habit tracker for “savoring”, but lately it’s been things I’ve remembered savoring rather than things I’ve been intentionally savoring. I think I would like to plan more intentional things to savor. But anyhow, things I have savored this week:
– The ice flowing on the Potomac River.
-Baroque music. I’ve been listening to the radio in the car lately rather than just putting on a podcast. There is something about the serendipity of radio music – being delighted and surprised by what is playing. One day this week, I got in the car and turned the key in the ignition and I was greeted by the sound of a transcription for solo piano of a Bach Partita. It made me so happy. Hearing the Bach reminded me of how, there is a member of the music staff at work who would play Bach in the mornings on the piano in the rehearsal rooms. I would come in to set up for rehearsals and there he would be playing with the grace and precision that I love about baroque music. It was always the most perfect start to my days.
– The quiet moment right after I’ve struggled to get all three kids out of the house with their stuff, put them in the car, buckled them in, and shut the door. Standing outside the car with the door closed, you can’t hear anyone cry because their sibling is kicking them or scream that they don’t have their car stuffie or whine about having to go to school. With the door closed, I can take a moment to close my eyes and take a deep breath and enjoy the silence. Then I feel ready to open the driver side door and get back into the cacophony.
-A song recital. I know it was work, but Strauss wrote some really great music.
-Working a song recital. The flow of following the music and bringing up titles at the right moment.
– The baby. In all her messy, mischievous, glory. Even though she tried to down a container of powdered sugar as if it were a tankard of beer. Definitely took some moments to savor our adventures, just the two of us. This wasn’t how I thought the first two and a half years of her life were going to go, but it’s been really great, actually.

What We Ate: Another unplanned pantry meal week, but I think we actually did pretty well.

Saturday: Pizza and Paddington 2. We had double pizza and movie night this week. We had forgotten to defrost pizza dough the Friday before so the traditional pizza/movie night was… less than satisfactory. So we had a re-do. Paddington 2 was delightful.

Sunday: Leftovers – kitchen sink fried rice.

Monday: Farmhouse Barley Soup from Vegan for Everyone from America’s Test Kitchen. Only we were out of barley so I used farro instead.

Tuesday: I was working, so I picked up a sandwich at the café next to work. The Husband made dumplings and noodles for the kids since it was Lunar New Year.

Wednesday: Vegan Gnocchi Soup. This recipe to use up a package of gnocchi that has been sitting in the fridge since the last time I made this recipe.

Thursday: Sweet Potato and Black Bean tacos from Dinner Illustrated.

Friday: Pizza and Cinderella Story: Once Upon a Song.

Weekly recap + what we ate: jumping

At the beginning of the week, I got into my car, only to find that the battery had died. Apparently on Friday, upon arrival home from school, and unloading from the car, someone (ahem… a child) did not fully close their door when they got out of the car. Another someone (another child) had turned off the dome light, so I had no idea that the car sat there all weekend with a door not quite closed. And a long weekend at that. So when I got into the car on Monday to go to the movie, the car wouldn’t start.

Luckily we have a spare car – an almost 20 year old vehicle that we inherited from the Husband’s parent – so I used that car for a few days. But then on Wednesday, I take the ten year old to her morning piano lesson in the spare car. I drop her, take the other two kids with me to pick up breakfast sandwiches (our Wednesday morning bribe to get the kids in the car by 7:06am), then come back to sit in front of the piano teacher’s house while the lesson finished up. The ten year old comes out, gets into the car and then …. the car doesn’t start. Cue my huge cry of disbelieving frustration. I cannot believe I have two dead batteries in two different cars in two days. I call the Husband at work and he comes and jumps the car, takes the four year old to school so I don’t have to turn the car off again, and tells me to go on a nice long drive. I have about 45 minutes before the ten year old needs to be at school, so we take a nice long drive.

Then that evening when I get home, we jump my car and I go on another nice long drive.

So jumping…

I don’t know if it’s just been hard getting back into a routine with COVID closures and snow days and what not, but this week has felt really unmoored. I was driving down the freeway on the way to the ten year old’s school and it struck me – I feel like a frog jumping from lily pad to lily pad, with scarce time to linger and catch my breath. Every day is a mad dash from one school drop off to another to a toddler activity to home for lunch to back in the car for pick up from one school than another. But really, I just want to sit on my lily pad and watch the flies go by.

I think maybe also the weather has something to do with this sense of body constantly in motion. It’s been in the mid 20s all week, which it makes it a little too cold for me to really slow down and linger outside, even though outside is where I often get my energy. At that temperature, with no snow to play in, I’ve discovered my outdoor limit with the baby is about 45 mins. I think I clocked only 9 hours outside this week. But even still, we did go on some beautiful 45 minute walks – nice pauses between lily pad jumping.

I was on the hunt for more of the County’s Selfie Stands, so I took the baby for a walk on a trail around a lake. The county website said that there was a stand on this trail, but we didn’t find it. We did, however, see lots of geese – noisy creatures in their V formations, that swooped above our heads and then landed on the frozen lake. Turns out the selfie stand was at the end of the trail, but a fallen tree in our path had discouraged us from making it all the way there. Now that I know where it is, though, we will have to return.

I actually had two failed selfie stand excursions this week. The second one was at a park, and I’m pretty sure the stand isn’t there even though the website says there is. But we did get this cool picture of a hollow tree:

Another day, I tried to take the baby to a playground, but it was too cold for her to be interested in playing on the equipment, so we went for a walk around the park. The grounds around the park is prone to flooding, and there were some beautiful ice puddles. I found the variety of shapes and lines mesmerizing. The baby was fascinated by the effects of her stick on the ice, and the cracking sounds and patterns that she could make.

Later in the week, I did finally manage to locate a selfie stand. This one was on the site of a house and garden that I hadn’t been to before. The site was once a private residence but is now part of the County Parks system. The house and gardens sit on five acres of land in a quite wealthy residential neighborhood, and it was almost like visiting someone’s private estate gardens. Right now, everything was all bare and bramble, but there were potential flowers. I’ve made a note to come back to see how these tightly close buds will open to become magnolia and azaleas come warmer weather.

Other things of note this week:

The Husband cooked dinner all week again, and I found time to practice playing the concertina. I can now play a C major scale and a G major scale. I’m realizing that the 20 button concertina is perhaps better for playing chords and accompanying oneself while singing, rather than more melodic endeavors. So I’ve decided that before March 11th, when my rental period is up, I want to be able to sing “Dear Theodosia” from Hamilton while accompanying myself on the concertina.

Speaking of Dear Theodosia… because I’m driving the oldest kid to school these days rather than catching the 8:15a bus, we have an extra 45 minutes in the morning to chill at home. The other day after breakfast we had a bit of time and the four year old asked if we could sing Dear Theodosia, so I found some music online and we sang it together. It was such a beautiful perfect little moment in the pause before the chaos of getting out the door.

A great podcast conversation I listened to this week was this Fresh Air Interview with Kal Penn – I thought he had a lot of really beautiful things to say about being a child of Indian immigrants, and being an Indian actor in Hollywood. He had a striking anecdote about trying to convince a director that he shouldn’t play a part with an Indian accent, noting that he thought it was important the other Indian kids should get to see themselves on tv as Americans and not as caricatures. The director refused, and Penn notes: “I think it’s a bit of a misnomer that racism only comes from ignorance; it can also come from a conscious maintenance of power and a desire to keep people down.” Growing up, I always felt that being blond was the ideal because that is what you see in mainstream media, and Penn’s anecdote really hit close to home.

Conversation with the four year old:
4 year old: Can you read me Green Eggs and Ham?
Me: I don’t really like Green Eggs and Ham.
4 year old: It’s not about you liking Green Eggs and Ham.

What We Ate:

Saturday: Grilled pork tenderloin with roasted asparagus, green beans and potatoes. It was the birthday of the Husband’s father, who had passed away five years ago. On his birthday we always try to have a meal that he would have liked. There is something really fun about grilling when it is 20 degrees outside.

Sunday: Leftovers and apple pie.

Monday: Parsnip Soup.

Tuesday: I can’t remember, but it involved leeks and lemons and maybe fish? The Husband had borrowed a stack of cookbooks from the library and this recipe came from a Mediterranean cookbook.

Wednesday: Sweet and Sour Pork and Broccoli

Thursday: Broccoli Pasta Bake.

Friday: pizza and Sense and Sensibility. I saw this movie in the theatre when it came out in 1995, a year that was full of wonderful Austen adaptations, and I love it so much. I’ve watched it many times, and I partly picked the movie because we’re trying to watch movies from our own DVD collection. This time through the movie, I was stuck by how beautifully framed so many of the shots were, creating such a sense of intimacy in every scene. I had never noticed before, but the scene where Elinor tells Edward that Colonel Brandon has offered him a job is shot in almost one long take, as if the tension between the two almost lovers is too fragile to break up by switching camera angles.

Weekly recap + what we ate: Snow! finally!

Snow and clouds and blue sky in between.

We finally had snow! After the mildest of winters, snow arrived. Enough snow and ice that the first two days back from winter break were declared snow days by the school district. The third day was a delayed opening, and it ended up being quite a mess; so many school bus drivers were out due to COVID that ninety bus routes were cancelled that day. Given that COVID numbers were going up, we decided that just to be cautious I would drive the nine year old to and from school instead of having her take the bus. I’m not sure if it really is going to make a difference, but isn’t this whole pandemic layer after layer of risk mitigation and risk assessment? So we figured if the bus was a layer of COVID risk, we could remove that since I could drive her. Hopefully by the time I go back to work in February, the COVID numbers will have gone down.

I’ve been reading Katherine May’s Wintering, and she has a passage about snow days that I love:
“I love the inconvenience [of snow] the same way that I sneakingly love a bad cold: the irresistible disruption to mundane life, forcing you to stop for a while and step outside your normal habits.”

In a way, the snow day seemed like merely an extension of our COVID isolation period – a time outside of the everyday rush and bustle where we were forced to just be in the place we were. The Husband went to work – since his test was negative and he was vaxed and boosted and had no symptoms, he was allowed back to work after five days – leaving me home with all three kids. We couldn’t venture very far afield, and instead found our lives wrapped in a cozy cocoon of winter weather. Even our planned grocery delivery had been cancelled. So we ate down the pantry and the freezer, and the shin deep snow in the backyard was our playground.

Bundling the kids is always a process. It takes me about fifteen to twenty minutes to get the four year old and the baby fully into their snow gear and out the door. (The nine year old gets herself dressed, save for me zipping her up since we have these gloves with extended cuffs that have to be put on before the coat.) Mittens, snow suits, hats, scarves, wool socks, boots, Aquaphor to protect their cheeks … it’s a lot. But at least I know they are warm enough to they will stay out there for a good long while. I do need to put a calendar reminder for next fall to review the snow gear since I think the two older kids will need new snow pants next year, and definitely boots. Luckily there will be hand me downs for the baby.

The second snow day, the nine year old wanted to take a walk down to the trail to see what the snow looked like there. Everything was blanketed white and shimmery ice. The kids played a little too close for my comfort at the edge of the creek, my warning that wet feet would be cold feet going unheeded. It was a beautiful walk, though. The trail was quite empty and the stillness made our crunching footsteps seem louder than normal. I love the squeaky brittle sound of walking in snow.

There was a nice lazy rhythm to these snow days… up and outside by 9:30a. Play in the snow until lunchtime. Then lunch with hot chocolate – I had bought a large pack of hot cocoa bombs from Costco before Christmas. I don’t think I ever got the milk hot enough to melt the chocolate shell and release the hot cocoa mix in a swirling explosion like on the YouTube videos. The bombs kind of just floated in milk and then slowly disintegrated to reveal cocoa powder and marshmallows. Oh well, nothing is ever like on YouTube.

Then indolent afternoons of screentime (nine year old), books (four year old) and naps (baby) while I tried to pick up the kitchen. I was once again reminded how much living happens when people are home all day. The clean up felt constant. It was definitely an unrelenting couple of days.

Wednesday, I took the four year old and the baby sledding while the nine year old was in school. (The current guidelines allow her back in school if she is vaccinated and without symptoms, so I guess she didn’t really have to quarantine.) I love sledding even though we don’t own a sled. I had, in fact, put a calendar reminder for myself to buy a sled last fall. But fall came with it’s sixty degree weather and the need for a sled didn’t seem imminent. Never mind that the point of writing myself a calendar reminder was so that I didn’t wait until the need was indeed imminent. I felt a little sad earlier in the week as I watched other kids whizz down hills in their sleds, and kicked myself for not having bought a sled. Then I went looking around the house for other things to use. I ended up grabbing a cardboard box (what else?) that I wrapped in a garbage bag, and the cement mixing tray that we had been using as a water table. This latter worked surprisingly well, though the cardboard and garbage bag did manage to get the baby down the hill, even if not as slickly. It was really adorable because the four year old insisted on keeping one hand on his sister’s “sled” as they went down the hill in tandem. Once in a while they fell over, going heels over head, but they got up and did it again, pushing and pulling their make-shift sled up the hill.

Thursday, was the first day that both kids were back for a full school day. I took the baby to Seneca Creek State Park in hopes of having a little hike, but she just wanted to play on the playground. I did manage to convince her to walk down to the edge of the lake and we threw branches in the water, a favorite pastime. It was definitely cold – probably mid 30s – but there is something I really love about cold weather and bare trees and the quiet of winter.

Friday we had more snow, and another snow day with classes cancelled. I took the kids sledding again. This time, I also brought along a baby bath tub since the cardboard and garbage bag from last time had disintegrated. The baby bathtub didn’t work great, which was just as well since the baby wanted to go to the playground instead. So, after telling the nine year old to keep an eye on her brother, I took the baby to the playground. She wanted to swing, though before I knew it, she had fallen asleep in the swing!

We ended up meeting up with some friends at the hill, which always make things more fun for the nine year old. And then at one point, I looked up and a snowball fight had broken out among all the neighborhood kids who were at the hill, complete with sled barricades. Of course my first instinct was to tell the nine year old that she shouldn’t be throwing snowballs at other kids, but I bit my tongue and let the classic kids rumble play out.

So in the final tally, the first week back at school was actually one short day and one full day. The four year old was technically released from isolating on Thursday, so he had one day of school before the snow day since the day care follows the public school closures.

On the one hand, three snow days in one week is a lot, but on the other hand, I was kind of glad that I had a bit of relief from the anxiety of sending my kids back to the COVID germ pool that is school.

Fun food discovery:
I’ve started making a Dutch Baby for breakfast on those days when the kids want pancakes but I have no patience for all the assembling and mixing and making. The Dutch baby batter comes together quickly in the blender and then cooks up super fast, all in one skillet. Bring the skillet to the table and everyone have at it. So much quicker than pancakes.

What We Ate:

Monday: Green bean and tofu stir fry.

Tuesday: Black Bean tacos. Basically a can of black beans, warmed up with half cup salsa. Eaten on tortillas.

Wednesday: Lentil Quinoa bowls with Roasted Broccoli.

Thursday: Cod cakes (from Dinner Illustrated) with roast asparagus and potatoes.

Friday: pizza (the husband made) and The Muppet Movie. It was the baby’s turn to choose so we each picked a movie from our DVD collection, lined them up in a row and let her pick one. I have to admit, while I find The Muppet Movie hilarious, I have yet to stay awake for the whole thing. Funny story – the Husband used to watch this movie with the nine year old, and everytime the movie got to that bit in the middle where the projector “broke”, he would turn it off and say, “Oh no! I guess that’s the end of the movie.” It took her a while to figure out that there was a whole other rest of the movie that she hadn’t seen yet.