Tag: family movie night

Weekly Recap + What We Ate: Thinking about an Intentional Summer

Last week was my first week without a show to work on, and, as always, there’s a period of readjustment/ re-entry after being gone in the evenings and weekends so much. Things are not where I expect them to be, routines have shifted, some routines haven’t shifted yet I need to figure out how to fit back into them. Expectations have shifted. That’s a big one, I’m learning. When the family doesn’t expect me home, it’s a bit of a shift when I am all of a sudden around.

Some delightful things last week, though…

-Social plans with friends – Happy hour (or rather happy three hours) with my friends from the bus stop who I don’t see anymore because of return to office orders. It was great to catch up and I had a delicious dill pickle brined fried chicken sandwich. Another day, I had lunch with other friends whom I used to work with but now don’t see anymore.

-Randomly running into one of those lunch friends four days later at the skating rink with our kids. Isn’t it so delightful when you randomly run into a friend? And it was so nice to meet her son. I have friends who I meet through our kids and it’s nice to have friends that were friends before kids and you finally meet their kids and it’s like meeting a mini version of your friend.

-Going to Ikea with my parents. Having lunch at the cafe where the light is so soft and makes everything look good. Also – how much do I love wandering through Ikea! All the lives and possibilities it’s trying to sell me? Everything so practical. And finding the exact chair we wanted in their clearance room for $17, marked down from $35.

It was a very rainy day – felt very Scandanavian.

-The 5 year old was finally baptized. The Husband is Catholic, so this is something that we had intended to do in 2020, but pandemic and then procrastination. And here we are. I’m not Catholic, but I do love rituals of tradition and gathering.

-It’s also Breakfast Smoothie Season here. The kids have been having berry smoothies (cashews – though I’m temporarily out, frozen berries, kefir, honey, chia seeds, banana, ice.) and I’ve been having green smoothies (kale, ginger, honey, vanilla, kefir, banana). The other day, the 5 year old said to me, “You have an Elphaba smoothie and I have a Galinda smoothie!” Side note, I think we will be watching Wicked for movie night soon.

Summertime….For the first time in a while, I’m not working during the summer. Even though the prospect of nine weeks at home seems to stretch into the void, I know it will fly by quickly and before you know it, we’ll be back in school. I don’t want to arrive at the end of August feeling like I didn’t have an intentional summer. Which is not to say everything needs to be planned – I just want to have a good mix of fun, productive projects, active moments, and relaxing time. And connection. I am fast realizing that our summers as a family of 5 are limited. We only have four or five years left before the oldest one is launched and off to college. I want to set building blocks so that we feel connected as a family.

Things that are already on the calendar:
-Swim Team for the 13 year old, pre-team for the 8 and 5 year olds. This means 5 evenings a week at the pool for most of June and July.
-Trip to South Africa with the 13 year old. (10 Days)
-Weekend in New York City to meet up with the Husband’s sister.
-Summer Camp -for the 8 year old: 2 weeks of theatre camp. For the 13 year old, 2 weeks of basketball camp and 3 weeks of theatre camp
-continuing with piano lessons (13 year old and the 8 year old), and basketball workouts (13 year old), and skating lessons (8 year old and 5 year old) and agility class and/or gymnastics (5 year old)
-five days at a Taiwanese American cultural camp for the 5 and 8 year olds. They are going with my mother. I don’t really know what goes on there, but it’ll be their first time away without me or the Husband and I’m excited/nervous about how they’ll take it.
-the 5 year old’s last day of preschool will be the end of June. (SOB!). I’ve sent the notice. I’m feeling a little sad and wistful and I’m regretting that her last day will be while I’m away, but it didn’t make sense to keep her in longer since she’s going to Taiwanese American kids camp the day before I get back.

Other Summer Things on my Menu of Activities: I’m calling this a “menu” because these are things I’ve brainstormed for this summer – some fun activities, some life tasks. It’s not a “to do” list or any kind of mandate by any means.
-Time at the Pool (aside from swim team time – I would love to swim some laps myself. Maybe even take the kids to the county pool where there are water slides.)
-Getting the two younger kids to learn how to swim confidently and independently.
-Make a family summer play list.
-Family biking time – teaching the 5 year old to ride without training wheels and getting the 8 year old a new bike. (he is currently using a pink and turquoise hand me down bike with broken pedals.)
-Teaching the 8 year old how to tie his shoes.
-Boba taste test. There are a lot of boba shops around here. The 13 year old and I have a plan to try all the places and pick our favorite.
-Camping.
-Hiking.
-Visit the library and read lots of books
-Find a perfect pair of sandals. This is on the summer list every year for the past three years or so, but I love my current El Naturalista Zumaia sandals so much that I always I manage to squeeze one more summer out of them. I would like to get a new pair of sandals before I leave for South Africa.
-make paletas. I borrowed some books from the library with recipes I want to try.
-Mow the lawn regularly. I don’t like yardwork, and the Husband does most of it, so I’m vowing to take on some of it.
-host friends for grilling/dinner
-Lunches and meet ups with friends, particularly mom friends and former federal worker friends.
-Outdoor concerts and music
-eat lots of peaches. (Last year we regularly got peaches from The Peach Truck, but they aren’t delivering nearby this year. I’m trying to decide if it’s worth the 30 minute drive for a 25 lb box of amazing peaches.)
-Take the kids to a rock climbing gym or to the adventure park.
-Take the kids to the local water park.
-Closet audit. Get rid of things I no longer wear.
-Watercolor postcard project. Paint and send mail. (Do you want a postcard from me? I feel like if I collect addresses, I’m committing myself to doing this one. Which would be a good thing.)
-Go school supply shopping in early August. Also Maryland’s tax free week is the beginning of August, so if we need any clothes or shoes, that would be a good time to go shopping for those. (Although the kids usually get fresh shoes for summer…)
-Teaching the kids some life skills (cooking, touch typing, how to tell time, maybe cursive – is that too ambitious?)/ making sure they get into the habit of doing their chores.
-Eating outside when possible.
-Have a screen free day or two.
-See some opera. Even though I won’t be working for the opera company I worked for last summer, i do want to see some of their productions.
-movie afternoons, either at home or at a movie theatre.
-Buy produce at a farmer’s market, or a farm stand. Make yummy food from our purchases.
-Going to the County Fair, riding all the rides and seeing the animals.
-Work-wise – we have union negotiations coming up this summer. I want to be an active participant in that.
-I also have a few work meetings scattered here and there that I’ll need to attend.
-Decluttering projects: The sewing corner, my desk corner, the medicine/linen closet in the bathroom, the pile of outgrown clothes/hand me downs in the 13 year old’s bedroom. The toy room. I’m posting a picture to remind myself what a dire situation these places are. Brace yourselves, it’s kind of awful. I hope I’ll have some “after” pictures come August.

Potential Summer Stressors:
-Money. When I’m not working, money is of course a little tighter. I’m going to try to pick up one off gigs when I can, but to be honest, I don’t love event work; it pays really well, but is highly stressful for me.
-Not having enough alone time. I will always have at least one child at home with me this summer, and sometimes I just want to sit and read and not have to fix a snack or read someone a book or referee a fight or what not. I’m lucky that my kids are pretty self sufficient, but even still, it’s not nothing.
-Being hot. Being in the sun. Being in the car when I’m hot. This always just puts me in a bad mood. At least I won’t have a soul sucking commute like I did last summer, though there will be time in the car because of camp drop offs/pick ups.
-mosquitoes.
-house projects with the house we manage.
-Getting the kids to actively participate in chores or family activities/ fighting about screen time. I fully recognize the need for them to have time to chill and decompress, but also want to balance that with a sense of responsibility.
-Eating dinner at the pool all the time and keeping pool time organized in general. It’s a lot of work to pack for the pool. Last year, I got it down to a good routine, but every year is a little different. One of the big shifts this year is I have to reconsider where we dry the swim stuff. We used to dry it in the lower bathroom, but now that is the 13 year old’s bathroom, so it is going to be inconvenient for her to have to always move the stuff.

Now that I’ve written all that down, I can see summer as full of possibilities and also some road blocks. I think what will help with the road blocks:
-Researching low cost activities. We are lucky there are a lot of free things to do in the area.
-Sitting down and making a plan to do those low cost activities. Put them on the calendar.
-Being brave and saying, “Yes” to any gigs that I can work.
-Having a structure to my days – block in rest time and adventure time and chore time. Or acknowledge that some days will only be two of those three categories. Or even just one.
-Have lots of cool treats and beverages in the fridge and freezer.
-Meal plan. I do this a lot anyway.
-Making a screen time plan with the kids.
-Embrace mornings as calm times. Embrace evenings as family time.
-Remember that the goal is we a feel connected and ready for the new school/work year in September.

Grateful For This Week:
-Stories from my parents. I’m going to admit that my parents and I don’t have a super easy relationship. It’s loving and supportive, but the conversation has never really flowed easily between us. I’m sure I need to unpack that a little -I feel like it has something to do with the culture that my parents are from (very patriarchal/valuing filial piety) and the culture I grew up in (less so, and resentful of filial piety) Anyhow, on Mother’s Day, the New York Times published article called “25 Questions to Bring You Closer to Your Mom.” Every so often in the days that followed, I would ask my mom and dad one of the questions, and the answers were surprising and insightful. Some of my favorites:
“What was your nickname growing up?”
“What are some of your favorite memories of the two of us?”
“What’s the worst advice you ever received about motherhood?”
“Who made you feel seen when you were growing up?” I thought this one was particularly interesting because both my parents said when they were growing up, they didn’t want to be seen, because that meant they were in trouble. This made my heart ache a little.

-Dog Man books in the Little Free Library. The 8 year old LOVES Dog Man books. I love not having to pay full price for them.

-Sleep. Trying to catch up and having the time to catch up and having a bed in which to catch up. I’ve been noticing this past year that I get incredibly tired the day or two before I get my period. Like “in bed by 9:30pm” tired. (I’m usually in bed at midnight most nights). I’m grateful I had the time and space to be able to just sleep last week when I was premenstrually tired.

-Cherry Coke and a chocolate chip cookie. An awesome combination.

-The 5 year old getting into the French Immersion program. This means that she will get to go to the same school as the 8 year old. Thank goodness. I mean we would have figured out three kids at three different schools – and we will have to in a few years – but I’m grateful that that is a future me problem.

-The Husband for clearing everyone out of the house when I had a splitting headache. He took the 8 year old to soccer practice and also convinced the other two kids and my parents to ride along. I lay in a dark and quiet room and popped a bunch of Advil and was feeling much more normal when they came home two hours later.

-That the rain let up just in time. We were supposed to meet our friends for a picnic and a show last Friday, and just as I was stepping out the door, the rain came down in unrelenting sheets, making driving pretty scary, and I thought, “Uh oh, so much for a picnic!” But the rain was actually quite isolated and the skies at the park was clear and the picnic tables were relatively dry and we had a lovely picnic lunch and then went to see a student musical theatre showcase and it was quite a fun evening.

-Park benches along a trail and the the perfect not to hot/not too cold weather to sit on one and enjoy the wind in the trees.

Looking forward to:

-June. Maycember is hitting pretty hard. I don’t know that June will be any more restful, but I’m looking forward to flipping the page on the calendar. It’s all good things in May – baptisms, recitals, soccer games, parents visiting, first communions, wrapping up the school year – but it is exhausting to be always out and about.

-Memorial Day Weekend. Is this weekend?!?!?! where did that come from? I understand we have plans to grill with our friends, but I’m a little hazy on the details.

-This audiobook. I don’t usually do romance novels on audio, but this one is narrated by Will Watt, who read Ten Things That Never Happened, and he was so charming and heartfelt in that book that when I saw he had recorded a new audio book, I immediately put it on my holds list. His deep, rumbly voice is like being wrapped up in my favorite feel good movie.

What We Ate:
Monday: Pesto Pasta Salad from NYTimes Cooking. I didn’t have capers, so I used sundried tomatoes instead, and I subbed walnuts for the pine nuts. Everyone really liked this. Vegan

Tuesday: Shrimp Tacos. This was the night I went out with my friends, so i had a very tasty dill pickle brined fried chicken sandwich. Before I left, I prepped the shrimp for the tacos and left the 13 year old with instructions on heating up the taco shells.

Wednesday: Kielbasa on the grill, sweet potatoes, and steamed broccoli. The Husband cooked. The sweet potatoes were this recipe, and were really tasty. The Kielbasa was from the Kielbasa factory, and we cooked them on the grill. I’m so excited for more grilling. Also – in my quest for ways that the kids can help in the kitchen after dinner, I had the 5 year old label the leftover kielbasa:

Thursday: Dumplings and green beans

Friday: Chicken sandwich picnic – I also packed cucumbers, apples, and strawberries.

Saturday: Pizza (carry out) and Chariots of Fire (It was my dad’s turn to pick the movie. I’ve never seen Chariots of Fire before – the two older kids were surprisingly engaged. The 5 year old, not so much.)

Sunday: Mac and Cheese – the 13 year old is made dinner! She did accidentally put in twice the amount of butter than was called for, so it was a very rich mac n cheese.

Hope your week has been lovely!
What would you do with 25lbs of peaches? What corner in your house is most in need of a good declutter? Favorite frozen treat or cold drink for summer? Who made/makes you feel seen? Mosquito solutions? Any plans for the Memorial Day weekend? I have to work on Saturday, but I’m hoping for a hike and some time with friends on Sunday and Monday.

Weekly recap + What We Ate: Closing Night and Mother’s Day

Welp, another show closed and in the books. I meant to post this earlier in the week, but I’ve been so exhausted that I haven’t been at my computer. Plus my parents are visiting, which means that we need my desk chair at the dinner table, which means every time I have a minute to sit down and write, it feels really inconvenient because there is no chair at my desk. Well, I got over that road block and am now sitting at the kitchen table to write this little life update.

It’s a little crazy to think that I don’t have another show to work on until October. I didn’t book any work this summer because I would be travelling at a time that overlaps with a contract I usually take. I’m a little sad that I won’t be in the theatre for such a long time, but I’m going to lean into having a great summer home with the family.

I always make a list after every closing of moments that I want to remember forever on a show, and for this show, some were:
– the opening number with a billion light cues to call, which was kind of scary at first, but once I got into a rhythm, it was almost fun. Calling cues is the part of my job that gets all the glory, but for me it’s actually the easiest part of the job – you just have to know where the cues go and be able to follow the music and read the post its and look up once in a while to make sure things are still on track.

-The tenor and the baritone leads doing a silly dance onstage in the number when they are pretending to be teenagers. Nothing more fun than seeing grown men dance with abandon.

-The part at the end of the show where the lead female character sings, “Be here now. Be here now.” It’s such a beautiful phrase of music and some days, when I was really bone tired, I could hear her voice in my head, grounding me and helping me focus.

-The baritone who sings the father in the opening scene – I’ve known him for four or five years now and he’s still quite a young singer, but I think he has the heart of a dad and was just so perfect for the part.

-The bass’s aria set in the Zen Center, when he tells the main character to “Take one step…”. This was a special reunion for me because I first met this singer when he first came to America as a student – he was shy, barely spoke English, and had a voice and a heart as big as a house. And now he has a flourishing career all over the world. I’m always struck in my business by how strong the bonds are that we forge when we are starting out.

-The way the crew opened the walls at the back of the set. Opera can be pretty low tech – most of the time when you see something move in opera, it’s not computers or motors or what not; it’s a bunch of stage hands pushing or pulling. The first time we ran this scenic move, the wall zoomed open at an alarming rate and the lighting designer said, “It’s too fast! Do we really want it this fast?” But the doors needed to open within three bars of music. So I told the crew, “Open gently, then move off quickly.” And they did. And it was magical.

The rest of the week…

Usually after we open a show, I get some of my time back, especially evenings. But this performance schedule had six performances over six eight days, and one additional rehearsal on the night we didn’t have a show. So it has felt a little unrelenting. On my one night off, I went to see the 13 year old’s middle school musical – she was in the ensemble for Once Upon a Mattress. It was a cute show, clearly a lot of work, and everyone performed with so much enthusiasm. It’s fun to know that she had a tech week on the heels of me having my own tech week. After the show, she took me around an introduced me to all her teachers, which was kind of fun – that she still wants people to know who I am…

Middle school stage…

The rest of the week was errands and catch up and catching my breath. I had dropped so many things by the wayside that I’m slowly trying to pick up the mess and pieces and try to figure out what life is supposed to look like when I’m around.

Mother’s Day – I’m not a huge Mother’s Day person. These are the three things that I always ask for Mother’s Day:
– Get my picture taken with my kids. Doesn’t have to be fancy – just one photo where no one is picking their nose, or crying, or what not, and where I look half way decent.
-Some time outdoors. Either a hike, or a walk, or an activity.
-Some time alone.

The scorecard was decidedly mixed this year. I did sleep in until 7:30pm. At one point, I felt a little hand on my leg and then another little hand thrust a card under my hand. The card was sweet, even though said child had spelled his name wrong. It made me laugh. the 13 year old had used her own money to buy me a bag of M&Ms and a bag of gummy bears. I was torn between thinking it was such a thoughtful gestures and not wanting her to waste her money on candy at CVS. Parenting is full of conflicted emotions.

We had our usual spate of activities in the morning and afternoon. In the morning I took the 5 year old to Agility Classes, and, the sweetest thing, one of the coaches was handing out roses to moms. “Here,” he said to me, “I see you here every week, and I think you deserve a rose.”

My mother’s Day roses living with the 13 year old’s opening night tulips. She also got two bags of Takis for opening night. That’s what she really wanted…

After lunch, and a nap (perhaps that was my alone time?), more activities, and to be fair, the Husband asked if I wanted him to take the kids to skating lessons, but I said I would do it because I knew he wanted time to be in his garden, and he had been solo parenting for the better part of the time for six weeks while I was in rehearsal, so if anything, I figured that he deserved the alone time. Funny story – when the kids were little, they used to call the Husband “MommyDaddy”, I think this might have been because I was often out in the evenings. So I now joke that Mother’s Day should also be for the MommyDaddy as well.

But I got to skate while the kids were in lessons, so that was like alone time. After skating the kids wanted to play outside so I took the to the nature center. I read my book while they made me food. Here is bark burger and a leaf pie.

We spent about half an hour at the Nature Center before going home, where we turned around three times and then headed to Benihana. Originally it had been suggested that we go to Hot Pot again, but we had just been there, so I suggested Benihana as an “event” type meal. (If you’re unfamiliar, Benihana is a chain of hibachi restaurants where the meal is cooked in front of you with a lot of flash and dash. It’s like dinner and a show.) I hadn’t been since I was a teenager and the kids had never gone, so I figured it would be a fun outing. The food itself isn’t spectacular. Not awful, just very ho hum. But let’s be honest, we’re all there for the flying spatulas and spinning eggs. After dinner the restuarants were handing out Macarons for the mothers (or the assumed mothers), which was another nice treat. I think mother’s day is a little performative sometimes, but you know what, I’ll take a free treat.

After dinner, the family tried to fulfil my wish of spending time outside and getting a picture with the kids by taking us to a trail and going for a walk with the idea of taking a picture together. But for reasons that are a little inexplicable, and in retrospect were probably a little silly, things went quickly south and no good pictures were taken and people stormed back to the car in a fit of anger. To be honest, I’m not sure quite what happened. I think partly, I just wanted a quick photo on my iPhone with everyone looking at the camera, and the family instead brought this huge set up with a tripod and the 13 year old’s fancy camera, which I don’t know that anyone really knows how to get the photos off of it… And then no one would take a nice picture, which was hugely annoying for me. I just want one thing and I got a little snarky at the family’s inability to deliver that one thing. (okay, three) Anyhow, it was kind of an ignominious end to Mother’s Day. Oh well. We’ll all try again next year.

Conversation with my Five Year Old:
Me: Are you wearing underwear?
5 year old: No.
Me: Again?!?! You should be wearing underwear. Why don’t you wear underwear?
5 year old: Sometimes it’s just too much pants.

Grateful For:
-My parent’s health. My parents are both the upper side of 70 and are still so very active. They travel internationally three or four times a year, come visit us, play with the grandchildren. Go on long walks every day, usually four or five miles. Lead community organizations. Advocate for Taiwanese independence. Once in a while I look at them and I realize objectively they are quite old, something I tend to forget because they are so busy. I realize more and more that every year, month, week, day with them is a gift.

-Sunny sunny weather. Open window, fresh air. A comfy chair and a good book. And a messy living room, well inhabited.

-A new Pope! I know that it’s odd to be grateful for something that was probably inevitable, but I’m so glad that for a few days, I could replace doomscrolling with “hope”scrolling as I checked for news from the conclave.

-Getting to commute to work with my work BFF. She lives two miles from me and during busy opera season we don’t really get to hang out, so when we carpool to work, it’s like at 35 minute friend date.

-My Eye Doctor, for fixing my glasses. One night as I was going to bed, I stumbled and dropped my glasses and the lens popped out. I’m sure it was a minor fix, but I took it to My Eye Doctor, where I got the glasses from, and they put everything back together again.

-D, our contractor. He’s been working on renovating the basement of my parent’s rental unit and finished the work last week. But then this week we had sheets of rain and there was some water in the basement. D came over the same day that we called and looked at things, and then realized the sump pump wasn’t plugged in and more than that, the outlet that it was plugged into wasn’t working. He spent an hour at the house fixing everything. He’s so easy going and thoughtful and full of practical solutions, I’m so glad we have him on speed dial.

-Lights backstage. It is dark. Rope lights make everything better.

-Middle school teachers. On the day of the second performance of Once Upon a Mattress, I drove the 13 year old to school, so I could drop off snacks for the cast. OMG. Walking into the middle school was like walking into an alternative universe populated by strange half grown people all looking confused and defiant and disaffected and joyful. Sometimes all at once. And then there were these grown ups who kept saying, “Sit down. Don’t block the hallway. Get to class,” as if they were programmed on some kind of auto-loop. I went to a K-8 school, so this whole middle school thing is alien to me. And then as I was leaving the school, it struck me – this is what it is like every. single. day. The noise and chaos and emotion and physicality. It wasn’t just one crazy morning. it’s is every. day. Every day, my daughter walks these halls of screaming sensory overload. No wonder she comes home and wants to sit in her room and not talk to anyone for the rest of the night. And every day the teachers and school professionals manage the chaos and try to focus it into an environment for learning and growing. I have a hard enough time dealing with one tween/teenager. I am so grateful for the people who deal with hundreds of them every day.

Looking Forward To:
-Happy hour and lunch dates with friends. Now that my schedule is lighter, I’m doing all the social things.

-Season two of Poker Face. The Husband and I watched Season One together last year and it was a lot of fun. I’m excited for more murders and hijinks. Highly entertaining.

-Summer pool season. The weather is already in the 80s and muggy here and I can’t wait until I can be in the pool. Our pool opens in two weeks and soon we’ll be in the thick of summer swim team season. I’m going to have to think about how to prep for nightly dinners at the pool between swim practices.

-Just started this book. I’m determined to finish it before I go to South Africa next month, so I’ve set myself weekly reading goals. It’s proving fascinating and engrossing so far.

It’s a big book (almost 600 pages). But 25 of those years he spent in jail, so I’m really intrigued what that part of the book will be like.

What We Ate:

Monday: Ravioli Bake. The Husband made this and it was tasty – he was looking for easy recipes to make ahead and take along for those days when the 8 year old has to ride along to the 5 year old’s 6pm gymnastics classes and didn’t have time to have dinner beforehand.

Tuesday: Taco Tuesday – Ground beef tacos with guac, salsa, sour cream, cheese, and hard shells.

Wednesday: Chicken wings. My mother made them. This is one of her specialty dishes. The kids love it. It involves soy sauce, honey, and garlic.

Thursday: Black Pepper Asparagus and Tofu Stir Fry. I had picked up some asparagus and broccoli from the farmer’s market so I use both in this stir fry. Vegan.

Friday: not sure what the family ate. I was at work and ate leftovers. (Well sort of – I packed leftovers, but then got busy and didn’t eat them.).

Saturday: Pizza (take out) and Frozen.

Sunday: Benihana for Mother’s Day.

Welp, hope you have a lovely weekend. Ours is the usual kid activities and then the 5 year old is finally getting baptized. Hopefully there will be sunshine and fresh air involved, though.
What summer things are you looking forward to? Pools – yay or nay? Favorite pool dinners? Have you ever been to Benihana? Who was your favorite teacher in middle school?

Weekly Recap + what we ate: Opening Night, and April Reflections.

Another show opened! Yay! Now we are open, and I have a week of performances and meetings and cleaning up before I close out opera season. It feels like space has opened up in my life, but it is May which means a lot of life/ family/kid things are happening this month.

This weekend was probably busier than it should have been for me, given that it’s been a little non-stop at work. I should have taken time to gather my forces and refocused on what I need to do on the life admin/home front. On Thursday, my one official day off, I ran errands with a friend, went on a walk with another, took the two older kids to be “Mystery Readers” at the 5 year old’s classroom, took the 8 year old to soccer… it seemed like a lot for a free day when I really just needed to sleep or stare at the wall.

On Saturday, I decided to take the kids to a local street festival. We all biked there, which was really fun. Usually I walk while the two little kids bike and scooter (the 13 year old was on a service project with friends), but this time the kids said I should bike too, and it worked out better than I thought. The 5 year old is a dervish on the scooter and being on a bike, I could finally keep up with her. There’s something really fun about an excursion with the family where all of us are rolling on wheels. My goal is to get the 5 year old off her training wheels this summer.

The street festival has valet bike parking, which was really great. So we biked/scootered to the festival and left our bikes with the bike valet – so convenient. The place was super crowded and at first I remembered why I don’t often go to these festivals – there were so many people; I was supposed to meet up with friends, but I couldn’t find them; the inflatable activities weren’t being monitored and it was open season – chaos and even dangerous as balls and foam arrows flew around. I was actually pretty miserable for the first 30 minutes. But then I managed to pull the kids away from the inflatables/flying objects “fun” zone and we walked down the street and found a children’s musician singing songs about nocturnal animals. We sat in the shade, ate our snacks and listened to music, and I began to decide that I was having fun after all.

We walked on down the road, checking out some displays by various county organizations and found a mountain biking group – they had set up a little course and were letting kids try out mountain bikes. The 8 year old wanted to try and he ended up spending twenty minutes there, riding the same course of two little speed bumps over and over. He’s due for a new bike this spring – he is still using a hand me down purple and turquoise bike with broken pedals, which I think is a testament to how much he loves being on his bike – so afterwards I talked to the people running the mountain biking booth, and they said to get him a mountain bike because he can do whatever he wants on a mountain bike. The group also does youth mountain biking rides with a “no one left behind” philosophy – I’m excited to check it out further for the 8 year old. (And maybe the rest of the family…?)

Afterwards the mountain biking, we stopped at the truck touch, and I did end up running into some friends and having some great catch up time. So in the end, I’m really glad I took the two little kids to the street festival. I think I just have to remind myself to try to find the not so crowded places to be. One thing I thought was cool was they had “sensory friendly” tents where you could sit in a comfy chair with a pair of earmuffs on when things got to be too much. i thought that was such a great idea at an event that could be overwhelming.

That evening, the 13 year old and I got dressed up and went to the Gala Concert at my work. Her favorite opera singer was singing, so I thought it would be fun for her to go. We went with some friends, and it was nice to just go and watch a show without having to work on it at all.

Sunday I took the 5 year old to Agility Class and then came home, turned around twice and then went to work for the Sunday matinee performance. It’s nice that the show is so short because I have time to come home and still have a bit of time to re-set for the week.

I’ve been trying to lean into the idea of a “Sunday reset” to get me ready for the week ahead. So far my Sunday Reset list involves:
-Putting away the floordrobe and all the clothes on the bench in the bedroom.
-taking a shower. For me and the kids.
-planning my clothes for the week.
-boiling eggs for the week so I have easy breakfast. (I can’t find my silicone egg holder for the InstantPot so I’ve been boiling eggs on the stove and they don’t turn out as well. Suggestions welcome.)
-Tidying the living room and my desk. (usually one or the other, but I would love for it to be both.)
-exercise
-Cleaning out the backpack bins by the door
-Bluey with the family. Or Andor.
I would like to also add:
-dealing with the mail bin.
-clipping the kids’ nails. I always forget to do this until their nails are too long. I think if I had a set time to clip nails, it would be better.
-Getting the kids activity bags set so I don’t have to think about it later in the week.
-clean out my purse – it gets so full of receipts over the week.

I’m also wondering where the line is between Sunday routine and Sunday Reset. Maybe one is a flashy internet term and one is just … life. Because I would also like to find time on Sunday to be outside, to write on my blog, to connect with friends. But that doesn’t feel like it’s in the “get ready for the upcoming week.” category. Am I overthinking this? Also where is the line between over thinking and acting mindfully?

April Recap/ Reflections
April was definitely consumed by work work work work. I started prep for a show on March 31st and we had our final dress rehearsal on April 30th.

April highlights:
-finished our taxes on time. Finished the 13 year old’s taxes. (She got paid for the show that she was in last December. It was a 1099 and we claimed her voice lessons as an expense against it, so she ended up operated at a loss last year.)

-rehearsing, teching, and opening a show. It’s been one of the smoothest show processes I’ve ever had. It helps that it’s a remount of an existing production, and the show is short. Even still, everyone was lovely to work with, which is really important.

-“Ask Me Anything” session for the Production Assistants with the Staging Staff at work. So may words of wisdom and practical considerations to pass along to the next generation of people in the arts.

-March Madness. Yes, it says March, but it finished in April. We watched some really exciting games together as a family. I’m not a huge basketball fan, but it’s fun to see the Husband and 13 year old really get into something together.

-My mother and Uncle’s visit. Taking them down to the Mall and walking amongst the monuments.

-The weather – Spring has sprung. Sunshine, warm air. We’ve moved past cherry blossoms into tulips.

-Running – I ran 7 times last month, which is the most I’ve run since November. Getting to run along the Potomac on my dinner break is always great for views. I love that the path I take to run takes me across a bridge over the river, and from that end, I can look back and see my work place all lit up, and it seems so far away – it makes me feel like I accomplished something on my run, even though it’s really only a little more than a mile away.

-Continuing my daily yoga. Some days I squeaked it in with a 10 minutes video before bed, but most days I did 15-20 minutes in the morning.

-Lenten reading group. Such a great group of ladies with whom to contemplate life.

-Take your child to work day. I did not participate – my work hadn’t organized anything, but the Husband took all three kids to work, and they all had a great time. His work place goes all out for TYCW day, with lots of crafts, riding busses, scavenger hunts (one of the items is “Photocopy your hand”)

-figured out the 8 year old’s soccer team. He’s having such a good time being out on the pitch again.

-Easter service with the Bangla musicians.

-we finally got window treatments! It’s a little plain, but better than the mismatched curtains that I had before. I was so delighted by the top down/bottom up mechanism that I spent a good fifteen minutes after they were installed putting the shades up and down. The plainness of the shades do open up the wall on either side, and now I feel like I need art for the wall.

Before
After!

April Lowlights:

  • The Federal Government blood bath continues and it is very much hitting home. I’m trying not to think about it, but almost every conversation I have with friends starts with a ginger, “How are you doing?” because I just don’t know if people still have their jobs or not.
  • Not having a lot of time at home, leaving a lot of the burden of parenting with the Husband. Tech is hard on everyone.
  • Dropping a lot of balls in life admin.
  • Taking the corner into the parking lot poorly and putting a sizable dent in the car. AGH!
  • The house desperately needs a declutter, but I haven’t had time or energy to do it. I’m so tired of not being able to find things or constantly stepping on papers and toys and half done projects.
  • Owing money on taxes. This is to be expected now, but ouf. I’m going yo try to pay quarterly taxes this year, to make April less painful, but it might all be a wash.
  • The death of the Pope. What a humble, wise, kind, and beautiful person. The passing of public figures don’t usually hit me that hard, but the death of Pope Francis brought a real sense of loss.

April Insights- two insights, one practical and one philosophical:

-Practical- and this is super weedy stage management stuff, just warning you – Getting my cues in my book before we hit tech makes life so much easier during tech week. Okay, this seems obvious, but I struggle with this one. One thing I’m trying to work on with my own personal journey as a stage manager, is working ahead when I can. I often wait to put cues in my book because I think, “What if things change?” But you know what? They can’t change all 150 cues. So I should do what I can and move the Post It as I need to. For this show, I had the stage manager’s book from the last time they did this show, and that even gave me time to type my light cues onto labels for my own book. I’ve always kind of raised my eyebrows at people who type their cue labels, thinking it’s a lot of work for something, and kind of fussy. But OMG! how clean and pretty does it look to have all the cues typed?

This is the opening number – this is the most cues I have on one page, but the first twelve minutes of the show is a wild ride indeed. I basically just keep my head down, keep calling cues, counting measures, and am thankful that the lightboard operator is good at her job and keeps up with me.

I had hemmed and hawed about typing my labels because I like my light cues to be in a diamond shape and I couldn’t figure out how to print the labels in the right orientation to make them diamond shaped. I procrastinate for a week, thinking I would be able to figure it out. But then I decided, if the choice is between hand writing all 150+ light cues on the exact right shape label vs. typing them on not quite the right shape …. well typing them is so much faster. So I said to myself, “Diane, stop being ridiculous. Done is better than perfect. Stop waiting for the perfect solution to hit you on the head. You’ve been staring at this for a week now. Just do it the slightly different way and get it done.”

– The Philosophical – At our AMA with our Production Assistants, one of them asked us what is the best advice we’ve ever been given, and one of my co-workers said something that stuck with me. She said that Gavin Creel, a musical theatre star who passed away last year, said something that really stuck with her – (And forgive me if I’m not saying it correctly or paraphrasing it badly – I can’t find internet transcript of his exact words) He said that life isn’t a ladder to climb; it’s a lily pond. We are all on our own lily pads, and sometimes you jump from one lily pad to a bigger one, and sometimes you jump from a bigger one to a smaller one. And sometimes you jump onto a lily pad that sinks and sometimes you jump on to a lily pad that floats away and takes you somewhere unexpected and wonderful. I think this is such a beautiful metaphor because we live in a world that is obsessed with climbing the corporate (or what ever) ladder, but we have to realize that life is not all about climbing up. It’s about finding the lily pad where you want to be, and also about being willing to jump to a different lily pad when the time is right.

Cool Blogger’s Walking Club. Big thank you to Elisabeth for inspiring and highlighting daily movement. Some walks this week: walk on the trail near the 8 year old’s school, and grateful for a bench in the shade. Run at work on my dinner break, with blue skies and cool sculptures and architecture. Walk around the plaza at work on the day when I didn’t quite have time to go for a run. Walk to the Farmer’s market near work, where I got a pineapple ginger paleta (so refreshing, a bracing blend of sweet and spicy), and admired the front yard sculpture exhibit the neighborhood is sponsoring. A date to Costco with a friend (I’m counting this! We walked, and we got out of the house.). A walk on our nearby trail with a friend, catching up. A walk around the block one evening after work with the family, watching the kids collect leaves and run ahead of us, a perfect post dinner Sunday evening activity for Summer.

I was initially hesitant to declare participation because I knew I was going into a busy month, but you know what? It is more doable than I anticipated. I was motivated to find those ten minute chunks, late at night, on my meal break, etc. And it also gave me an excuse to try to cajole my family along with me. I think there was one day the first week of April where I didn’t get out and walk/run/bike, but I probably could have squeezed in something. Sometimes it takes planning, but also sometimes it’s about realizing when you have a bit of empty space. Not that we have to fill up all the empty space in our lives, but I’ve realized that going for a walk is still a form of having empty space – it gives me time to think, or not think, to breathe, and work out a bit of restlessness. Ultimately, though, there is no failure here. We do what we can do.

Grateful For:

-The above mentioned chance for the 13 and 8 year olds to be Mystery Readers for the 5 year old’s class. Before we went, the 8 year old said that he was nervous, but he did a great job! He read Pigs to the Rescue and The Giving Tree. The 13 year old read Daddy Daughter Day and 100 Dragons Named Broccoli.

-the box of tempation at work:

It is filled with chocolate:

-Everyone at work who does such a great job to make the show look and sound so good.

-Parent coaches. Despite what I wrote last week about the fight between the two coaches at the 8 year old’s soccer game, I really believe parent coaches are doing amazing work. I watched the 8 year old’s practice last Thursday. Herding a bunch of 2nd graders seems like an exercise in frustration, but Coach Greg kept it together and managed everything so well.

-Carpools. The thirteen year old had a full day of activities on Saturday, and I didn’t have to drive her to anything thanks to carpools.

-That I still have a job. It seems like every week, there is a new round of layoffs at work.

-Zhong zi, and my mother for bringing them. When my mother was visiting in mid April she brought a whole bag of zhong zi. These are sticky rice balls, filled with meat and mushrooms and wrapped in bamboo leaves. They are one of my favorite Taiwanese foods. One day when the fridge was pretty bare since we’ve been behind in the shopping, I needed a quick lunch and found the bag of zhong zi. I steamed them up and we had them for lunch and it was the perfect low fuss meal.

-comfortable shoes. That match the carpet at work. A wonderful thing on days when I am on my feet all day.

-Other things that make tech week go well: lunch boxes and ice packs, the Husband, a comfortable bed, water bottles, the ginormous chocolate chip cookies from the canteen at work, monitors and a strong conductor’s down beat.

Looking Forward To:

-The 13 year old’s middle school musical. Opens this week. I’m really excited to see it.

-My parents are coming for a visit. They very rarely come see us together, so this feels kind of special.

-May! What a month. We have lots going on this month – the 5 year old is FINALLY getting baptized. The 8 year old has first communion. The weather is turning the corner from Spring into Summer. Farmer’s markets. Piano recitals. Voice recitals. Happy Hour and lunches with friends.

-Watching Season two of Andor as a family. Well, actually, watching season one of Andor as a family. I haven’t even seen the first season. I hear it’s really really really really really good.

-Reading this book, not sure what it’s about yet, but I find myself nodding along with a lot of its shrewd and cutting observations. And the chapters are short so it flies by.

What We Ate:
Monday: Lamb stew, from the freezer. Thank you again, past me.

Tuesday: Taco Tuesday. The Husband made chicken tacos

Wednesday: I had empanadas from the Farmer’s market since I was at work. This is the best part of being at work on Wednesday. I think the Husband made some kind of sausage skillet for the rest of the family.

Thursday: Dinner out with friends.

Friday: I had leftovers at work for an early dinner then went out with the stage managers after the show and had a truly decadent dinner – scallops, risotto, kale salad, fancy guava soda made from scratch, peanut butter pie for dessert. The Husband and kids had pizza (take out) and watched Smoky and the Bandit. (Which I have never seen myself.)

Saturday: Kitchen sink chopped cabbage salad with chicken. I was kind of at a loss for what to make, so I took a bunch of sad vegetables from the fridge (cherry tomatoes, cucumbers, cabbage, red onion, avocado), chopped it up, added walnuts, olive oil, salt, pepper, and red wine vinegar. Threw in some shredded chicken and… dinner! It was tastier than it ought to have been given the despair I felt when I first opened the fridge.

Sunday: Egg/ Breakfast sandwiches. The Husband cooked because I was at work. I think I had toast and yogurt when I got home.

Hope you have a lovely week.
Do you have a Sunday reset? How was your April? What does May look like for you? What do you make for dinner when you are looking in despair at the fridge at 5pm? Do you feel like you are on a ladder or a lily pad?

Weekly recap + what we ate: Back to work and Six Things Sunday

I’m back in rehearsal for a show. I’m lukewarm on the show, but I’m having a really good time with the people I’m working with. I think if I got to choose, I’d rather work with good people than on good opera. It reminds me of something that I once read Nicole Kidman say where she picks projects based on the director rather than the material because she has very little control over what the final film will be like, so she prioritizes having a fulfilling working experience. All to say, I’m glad to be back in the rehearsal room creating opera with people with whom I look forward to seeing every day. At the same time, I’m feeling a little tapped right now. I really don’t know how people managed to work full time and take care of life at the same time. The good news is I’ve signed off on our taxes, so that pressing issue is finished. But all the little life admin stuff – registration, calendar checking, decluttering, organizing – all that has fallen by the wayside.

To be honest, though, when I look at my day, I don’t think my growing life admin list is because I don’t have the time to do these things. There is always time, right? It’s just what does my brain feel up to in those bits of time when I’m not at work or trying to get the kids fed and out the door? It certainly isn’t life admin. Take for example, sleep. I always tell myself that I will just go straight to bed when I come home late at night after a rehearsal, but lately I’ve been coming home, eating all the snacks and scrolling until 1am. I’m not even doing things that fill my bucket like reading or journaling or scrolling. Or really, I should just be sleeping. And then it makes the morning come too soon and I’m dragging. It’s kind of a bummer habit I need to get out of.

Another case in point, this was originally going to be a five thing Friday brain dump, but now it is a Six on a Sunday post because I decided to scroll rather than blog on Friday night. Which, I know I feel better writing than scrolling, but I just find it hard to find the motivation and get back into a rhythm when I have to be at work 8 or 9 hours a day.

Three Bummer Things:
-An awful commute. One day, I forgot my phone at home, so after school drop off, I went home to get it and decided to take the “short” way to work. The “short” way is the Google Maps way. It is usually shorter, but it goes through a busy area, so the route can also be not so short. (My usual way to work takes 17 minutes, and it is down a parkway so it is much more predictable. The “short” way takes 15 minutes, which, now that I’ve typed that out, I find myself thinking, “Do those two minutes really matter?” I guess in my head one is “15 minutes” and one is “almost 20 minutes.”). Anyhow, the “short” was not short that day – there was more traffic than usual, and I ended up being stuck behind a big white truck that moved slowly. I think that can be a metaphor for our times – Stuck behind a big white truck and unable to see what is ahead. Anyhow, I finally got to work, but since, in an effort to get out from behind that big white truck, I came at our parking lot in a different direction than I was used to and I hit an unseen small bit of fencing pole that was poking up from the ground. There is now a huge dent/scratch in the car. UGH! An excellent way to end a hideous commute. I’ve refrained from taking the “faster” route since then.

-Not being able to find Cadbury mini eggs anywhere. C’mon, World! It’s still a week before Easter- why is EVERYWHERE out of these?

-The soccer league I signed the eight year old up for still hasn’t put him on a team, and the season started three weeks ago. I’ve written and called and all I get is that they are still working on it. I would normally just ask for my money back, but the 8 year old really wants to play soccer this spring. The issue is that the team he played on last fall was disbanded because they couldn’t find a coach. I feel a little bit of guilt on this issue because 1) I did sign him up a month after registration opened (but still three weeks before the season), and 2) I didn’t volunteer to coach when they asked me. I work a lot of Saturdays so coaching would have been tough, but I could have coached practices.

Three Delightful things:

– Friday’s swim lessons- two things delightful: 1) the five year old moved up one swim level and I was able to get her in the next class. Registering for county swim class is a little like Hunger Games here, so I was amazed that I could get her into the class. And 2) I ran into a mom friend at the pool who I hadn’t seen in over a year. It was nice to catch up and we’ve made plans to make plans in May after my show closes.

-organizing my pencil pouch and post it box. Getting rid of all the writing implements that I don’t use and having only the things I know and love and find useful in my pencil pouch.

Some day I will write a super geeky post about all my favorite office supplies I use for work.

-The clean smell of laundry coming from the dryer vents. As I was walking up the front walk late one night after work, the air smelled of clean clothes and soap- our dryer vents to the front of the house. I always love the smell of clean laundry coming from a dryer vent. Even when I’m out on a walk, and I smell warm laundry air from a random house, I inhale and feel so peaceful.

– One bonus thing ( which will make it Seven for Sunday, even though it’s now Monday)- the eight year old doing laundry. He has a favorite outfit, and one day we came home to laundry going. In the machine was a single pair of pants and a single shirt. Delight at him doing his own laundry co-existed with annoyance that he did a whole cycle for two items of clothing. It was a teaching moment for sure.

Grateful For:

-Group efforts to move a desk. Last fall, I realized that we had 11 stage managers coming in this spring and only 10 desks. But Fall 2024 Diane said to herself, “I’ll worry about that later” Welp a week and half ago “later” came and I realized that I would have to figure out how to get an 11th desk into the Stage Management Office. I’m really grateful for my work colleagues who helped me find a desk and rearrange the office to make room for the desk (while at the same time doing a major purge and decluttering of our space.). Also – the new desk is kind of small and doesn’t have drawers, so one of my co-workers made a drawer:

-People who plant flowers in their yards, bringing colour and beauty to my walks around the neighborhood. The tulips are coming out in full vibrant force and I love it.

-An evening at home. They will be few and far between in April, so I’m grateful for the few evenings I do get to come home before bedtime.

-The Husband for covering the evenings and the day the kids were off school.

-Past me for freezing soup. That feeling of panic and despair when I realize there is nothing in the fridge to take for lunch. Then the feeling of relief and excitement when I realize there is soup from January frozen in pint sized mason jars, ready to be tossed into my lunchbox and taken to work for lunch.

– My coworker who put air in my bike tires. My bike has been sitting at work for the past six months. I rode it to work one day and then for whatever reason did ‘t ride it home. And then it was winter. But now it is nice enough for me to bike again so 8’m looking forward to getting on the Ike again, only the tires were flat. I could bring my pump fr9m home, but my coworker said she had an electric pump in her car, so she pumped up my tires for me, Yay!

-Cool Blogger’s Walking Club, thanks to Elisabeth. I haven’t really officially declared participation because I don’t like failing at things I vow to do publicly, and this month is kind of optimal month for me to fail at walking every day. But knowing that CBWC is happening is a little bit of extra motivation to walk. Last week, my walks were mostly a quick walk around the block on my dinner break, or a walk to get coffee before rehearsal. A couple times, I embraced the “9pm post kids in bed” walk and walked loops around my block after dark. One time I even convinced the 13 year old to come on one of those late night walks. One day I walked one loop around the running track at school after drop off. Another day I meant to walk after I dropped the kids at the bus, but then I crossed paths with a fellow parent friend who used to work for USAID and I figured catching up with him was more important than a walk. (Though I guess I could have suggested that he walk with me.) And then today my uncle and mother are in town and we went down to the Mall and walked from the Lincoln Memorial all the way to the Air and Space Museum – DC is such a pretty city to walk in.

Looking Forward To:
-Kielbasa. The oldest and I stopped at The Kielbasa factory on Sunday. It’s a small mom and pop kind of place in a strip mall, just wide enough for one line of people to the deli/kielbasa case and one line of people at the cash register. We brought home three different kinds of Kielbasa. So looking forward to eating it. (Note – we did eat it, and it was delicious. I still have a tub of sauerkraut in the fridge, though. Some nights I come home and just eat that out of the container, it’s so good.)

-Spring Break. This coming up week is Spring Break. I have to work, so I’m not going anywhere, but the Husband is taking the kids away on an overnight. I’ll have the house blissfully quiet to myself for 36 hours or so. Of course I have to work for 20 of those hours, and sleep for 7 of those hours, so it’s not a wide swath of alone time. But it’s something. Certainly more than the Husband is getting.

-Final meeting of my women’s Lenten group – This also already happened, and it was such a wonderful meeting. They are talking about making this into a monthly meet up, which I would love. Would also give me time to actually finish the Lenten readings. I do think they are meaningful all year round, not just at Lent.

-Using my new Boba straw. We went for boba tonight and we got a free gift with our order! A reusable boba straw. I’ve been wanting one for a while now and I’m so excited to get to use it!

What We Ate (I seem to have two weeks of meals to account for…):
Monday: Butter pasta and green beans. I would like for the 13 year old to help with dinner more, so I asked her to make dinner one night this week. Monday seemed like a good choice since there wasn’t any school anyway. She wanted to make butter pasta, which in my mind is very similar to the blue box of mac n cheese she frequently makes. I asked if she had a recipe and she said, “I was going to cook the pasta and add butter until it looked good.” I understand there was also copious amounts of parmesan cheese as well. I didn’t get any because it was all gone by the time I got home from work. So I guess that’s good? The green beans were take out from our favorite dumpling restaurant. (On the plus side, even though there was no butter pasta left for me, the family did save me dumplings and noodles from the dumpling place.)

Tuesday: Middle School Tacos. I found the name of this recipe to be hilarious, and these were legit delicious. This is the classics taco in the hard shell with sour cream, ice berg lettuce, tomatoes and cheese. Funny story – I wrote “lettuce” on the grocery list, and the Husband asked, “What kind of lettuce?” and I said, “Taco lettuce” and he came home with a cabbage. Because every other taco Tuesday we’ve had cabbage with our tacos. But middle school tacos demand iceberg lettuce. So the Husband brought home an head of iceberg lettuce which, not to be a snob, but I don’t remember the last time we had ice berg lettuce. But once we tasted the tacos, we all agreed, ice berg lettuce was the right and only choice.

Wednesday: Waffles and eggs. The Husband cooked because I worked late.

Thursday: Tortilla soup from last week, taken from the freezer.

Friday: Pizza (the Husband made) and National Treasure. I hadn’t seen all of National Treasure before – what a fun movie. Plot holes galore, but very entertaining nonetheless.

Saturday: The kids had pizza at a Chuck E. Cheese birthday party. The Husband had take out. Not sure what the 13 year old ate. I ate last week’s salmon and miso rice leftovers from the fridge when I got home from work.

Sunday: Chicken salad and apple slices. Our typical snack/scrounge Sunday dinner. I also had a beet and cucumber salad – diced raw beets, diced cucumber, olive oil, lemon, salt and pepper, and dill. It was a tasty salad. We have some beets to use up from our friend’s CSA – I might packed this salad for many lunches this week.

Monday: White Bean Parmesan Soup. From the freezer. I can’t remember when I originally made it. Tasty and hearty.

Tuesday: Turkey Tacos – The Husband cooked since I was at work.

Wednesday: Tortellini and Kielbasa. I had leftovers at work, but when I came home there was a two inch piece of Kielbasa on the counter that the family had left for me.

Thursday: Dinner out with a friend at a local Mexican restaurant. I had ceviche and a horchata.

Friday: Pizza (ordered out) and movie night. They watched one of the Star Wars movies. I had the beet and cucumber salad at work, adding chickpeas for bulk.

Saturday: Kielbasa, green beans, and pan fried gnocchi. The Husband cooked and I think sometimes his strategy is “Put yummy food on the table and get it out of the fridge.” It was still tasty. My mother and uncle arrived later that evening, so I boiled some dumplings for them.

Sunday: Hot Pot. My uncle and mother are visiting so we went to our favorite hot pot place. I tried a new to me spicy broth – it was really tasty, but I don’t think I want all my food to be spicy, so I might not order it again. We really like this hot pot place – it’s our go to restaurant when we have visitors from out of town because it feels kind of special and it can accommodate a variety of diets.

Hope you have a sunny week!
Do you have a go to restaurant where you take guests when they come visit? Are you participating in the Cool Blogger’s Walking Club? If you blog, do you have a rhythm or routine to writing?

Weekly recap + what we ate: Play going

Another pretty life as usual week – people went to work, kids went to school, teeth were lost (!), we went to parks, shot hoops, ran errands, had tv time and movie nights. Last week was my last week without having to work evenings until mid May. This week I start having to cover evening and weekend rehearsals at work and there will probably be a rough patch of re-adjustment of all of our schedules and rhythms. I’ve had my evenings and weekends work-free for the past six weeks and I’ve enjoyed that time. Oh well, I’ll have lots of time off this summer.

Some things this week:
-It’s been a rough week on the “WTF is going on in the White House” front. I mean it’s been a rough two months, let’s be honest, but this week there were actions, words, declarations that were particularly hard for some friends and industries I am close to.

-On the good news side- My new glasses came in. Life looks much more shiny and clear now.

Also – they came in this super cute case:

-The 8 year old’s French concert. Every other year, all the French Immersion classes put on a concert. Every immersion class gets to present one song, even the kindergarteners. This year the concert was held at a high school auditorium. it was kind of a madhouse when we first arrived because it was raining, so everyone squished into the lobby and all the kids were running around wild and excited to see each other. Seating started 15 minutes late and there was for sure at least one kid crying because they couldn’t find their class. When it came time for the 8 year old’s class to sing, there was confusion with the sound operator and the 8 year old’s class just stood onstage while they got it sorted. Predictably the class got restless just standing there, but not our 8 year old. He just stood there quietly without fidgeting, almost as if he were a statue. It was kind of hilarious. Anyhow, in the end they figured things out and the concert was a lot of fun and there was a great sense of community. I know the point of an immersion program is for the kids to speak French, and I’m always so surprised at how clear all their accents are.

– I finally registered the 5 year old for kindergarten. Yay! Checked that off the list. I still have to put her in the language immersion lottery, but at least I’m one step closer to having the full Kindergarten registration check off my list.

The highlight of last week was taking a trip to the theatre with the 13 year old. It was kind of an impulsive decision. I had noticed that the Shakespeare Theatre Center was doing a play called Kunene and the King which was written by a South African actor/playwright and it was set in South Africa. Since the 13 year old and I are going to South Africa later this year, I thought it might be a good play to go see.

I had decided that one of my goals for this year was to go see a play. Like with talking and no singing. I texted a friend who sees a lot of plays about this goal of mine and she said, “Yes! See a talkie!” I think my instinct is always to go see a musical or opera because it’s the world I work in. I haven’t seen a play in yeeears. (not counting the 13 year old’s middle school play, staged last year in the school cafeteria.) Maybe I saw a Shakespeare something pre-pandemic? I can’t remember. But it’s such a different, more intimate medium. And I feel like it is a medium that demands a different kind of attention and would be a bit of a challenge for me because the drama isn’t flashy and singing and always demanding attention.

Anyhow, when I saw this play set in South Africa was being performed and that this was the last weekend, I decided to take the 13 year old. The cool thing is that people under 35 can get a ticket for $35 so her ticket was pretty affordable, a downright steal. We decided to make an evening of it. We took the metro downtown and had dinner at one of our favorite restaurants in Chinatown, Chinatown Express. They have very delicious hand pulled noodles. We ordered dumpling, soup dumpling and roast duck noodle soup. Truthfully, the soup dumplings weren’t at all soupy, so that was disappointing, but everything else was really tasty.

Afterwards, we had about an hour before our show, so we got some boba tea – oolong sweetened with honey with lychee jelly and boba for me, regular boba milk tea for the 13 year old. No mommy-daughter date is complete without boba. We got our teas and walked around the area. We found a square with tables and swings and a magnolia tree in full bloom, so we sat there for a fifteen minutes and swung and finished our boba before heading to the theatre.

I really enjoyed Kunene and the King. The play tells the story of a white actor who is preparing the role of King Lear in the wake of finding out that he has cancer, and Lunga Kunene, the Black nurse who is sent to look after him. The two men slowly form a friendship despite being on opposite sides of Apartheid. Funny and touching and surprising, and with Shakespeare woven throughout. The Shakespeare was especially lovely since I had just finished Judi Dench and Brendan O’Hea’s book about Shakespeare. And at the end… well.

There is something very humbling about watching a play, and thinking about how great the performances are, and being taken by the craft of the play, the scene shifts, and the costume changes, and the music and all that and then realizing that your 13 year old, sitting next to you, has her head on your shoulder and is starting to sobs because she has been so absorbed in the humanity and story unfolding onstage. Oh, it was such a good reminder to watch plays with open hearts and let ourselves be touched by the stories that people tell, onstage and otherwise, to recognize that even though the people onstage don’t look like us, don’t live where we live, don’t have the same history as us – that they still feel the same emotions as us, still have struggles like we do, are still humans like us. I think when art is criticized for being “woke” or for pushing ideologies… well, it kind of misses the point. We create to connect, not to divide. I am so frustrated that certain people in the administration don’t understand that fundamental aspect of what artists do.

Afterwards we hung out in the lobby (where I ran into a singer friend – how fun it is to serendipitously run into people you know at the theatre!), and the 13 year old got her program signed by the cast. I was in awe of John Kani, the man who wrote and starred in the play. He was such a trailblazer for theatre in South Africa – he collaborated with White playwright Athol Fugard (who just passed away) at a time when that kind of collaboration was something you could get arrested for doing. He created anti-Apartheid theatre works and was beaten and arrested for doing so. He was the first Black man to play Othello in South Africa, which was considered quite controversial since he had to play opposite a white woman. And despite all that, what the 13 year old was most excited about was that Kani played the King in the Black Panther movies. I mean admittedly that’s pretty cool too. He was very nice and signed the 13 year old’s program and when I told him we were going to South Africa this summer, he said that it’s a beautiful country now, even though it hadn’t been for many many years.

Grateful For:
-Finding the Eagle Shirt. The 8 year old has a favorite shirt – he calls it his Robot Eagle shirt. He would wear this shirt every day if he could. I found the shirt at a consignment sale when he was four and then I bought a bigger size off Poshmark for him when he outgrew the first one. Well, the shirt had gone missing for a couple of months now. But last week, I was going through some bags in the sunroom and I found his Robot Eagle shirt in a tote bag. Yay! He was so happy to be reunited with it.

-Our mechanic for getting our car back to us so quickly.

-The lawyers who are persisting. I have a good friend who works for U.S. Institute of Peace and from reading the papers, it’s take over by DOGE was a wild ride. I’m thankful there are lawyers trying to change/slow the churning machinery. I’m not hopeful that it will do anything, quickly, but in these times many are certainly carrying on with courage.

-Dishwasher. Washing up after dinner always seems so tedious. But then I remind myself I just have to load the dishwasher and wash the pots and pans and it all of a sudden seems more manageable. When I was growing up, we never used the dishwasher. We didn’t have one until we moved to California in 1992 when I was 13. And when we moved into a house with a dishwasher, my parents used it to store extra dishes, not to wash them. All to say, I did not understand the use of dishwashers until many years later when I had a kid. They are amazing! I was thinking of how lovely it is to have a dishwasher this week when I looked at the pile of dishes after dinner. I set a timer for 15 minutes and when it went off, that pile of dishes was in the dishwasher and I had washed the pots and pans.

-Bookstores. There is a new independent bookstore next the the 8 year old’s sewing class. I’m not a huge book buyer – I prefer to borrow from the library so that I can then return books to the library and not have them in my house forever. Having said that, I think I might buy a book occasionally from this bookstore because I do feel like bookstores can be such a wonderful part of our landscape.

-My friend who walked into my office with a bag of dill pickle chips, saying “I have a problem. I can’t walk by a bag of dill pickle chips without buying them for you.”

-NCAA Basketball brackets. It is indeed the madness of March in our household. The Husband declared that we are not allowed to watch scripted television until the end of college basketball season. (Exceptions given for Brooklyn 99.) The 13 year old has a bracket as part of an extra credit gym assignment. She and the Husband spent an evening poring over the choices and creating her bracket. In the midst of so much teen angst, it was so wonderful to see them bonding over something. (Oh my goodness, the Maryland Colorado State game – triumph and heartbreak back and forth for the last 30 seconds. I’m so conflicted because of course everyone here was so excited that Maryland won, but Colorado State really showed up too. I hate it when teams lose and everyone’s sad. Wait, I guess that’s almost every game. Two sides to every coin and all th.)

-Rec center fitness rooms. My tax dollars are work in such a great way. I finally made it the fitness rooms at our rec center. Rec Center Fitness passes have been free to county residents for the past two years, but I’ve always been too intimidated to go because I’m not a gym person. But there is a fitness room in the rec center where the 5 year old is taking swim lessons, so I’ve been popping up to do 15 minutes of strength training while she is swimming. So grateful to have this available.

-A cold fizzy Coke and a slice of cheese pizza. Sometimes it’s the perfect combination.

-That people still make plays. Even when they are 81 years old and have been beaten just for being Black, and have been in Marvel movies, they still believe in the medium of theatre.

Looking Forward To:
-Peak bloom! Peak Bloom! I know I said this last week, but it’s sooooo close! We’re in stage 5 of 6 right now. The Magnolias are blooming already, and there are some pear and apple blossoms to be seen. I hope peak bloom is this coming week because I have the flexibility to go down on a weekday for a bloomy wander.

-Having the summer figured out. This isn’t a “yay, fun!” looking forward to kind of thing, but rather a “Oh thank goodness we’re done!” kind of looking forward to thing. We’re so close to having summer plotted out. The 13 year old is signed up for all her camps and activities. I need to register the 8 year old for his camps. The 5 year old will continue at her pre-school until mid-July, I think. We have tentative dates for when we will take trips too, though nothing is quite set.

-Being one step closer to window treatments in the living room. You may or may not recall that we’ve been living without proper window treatments in the living room for two years, and it’s a perpetual To Do item on my list. Right now we have a combination of mismatched sheers and too short black curtain panels that I just happened to have lying around, but which don’t go all the way across the windows. Well, we’ve finally booked an appointment for the window treatment guy to come to our house. What I know that I want: Top down/bottom up . Cordless. Light filtering. What I might want: bamboo shades. But this might be tricky because our foyer, which leads into the living room has wood paneling and I worry about the shades clashing with the foyer. Oh well, this window treatment guy is highly recommended, so hopefully he can help steer us in the right direction.

-Started watching this show with the 13 year old and looking forward to watching more. I’m late to the game, I know:

-Listening to this book:

I’m not a big horror fan – I don’t like being tense all the time – but Bahni Turpin is one of my favorite audiobook narrators and for some reason I’m finding horror more entertaining than grisly in the audiobook format. This book has even made me laugh out loud a few times.

What We Ate:
Monday – Lamb Stew and Irish Soda Bread for St. Patrick’s Day. Other than making sure the kids are wearing green, we don’t do much for St. Patrick’s Day, but I do try to make an appropriate meal. This was all really tasty. The Irish Soda Bread is from our cookbook “The Irish Pantry” it’s a little more dense and not sweet like what often passes for Irish soda bread, and it’s made in a cast iron skillet, so it’s very simple to throw together. The effort to taste ration is very high.

Tuesday: Shrimp Tacos. This meal took less than twenty minutes to get on the table. Tacos may seem like a lot of work, but this is actually one of the fastest meals I make. The first fifteen minutes are: season the shrimp, put taco shells in oven, make pico, chop cabbage and squeeze lime over it, heat black beans (first toast cumin, oregano, and smoked paprika in a pot then add two cans of black beans. Heat through then mash with a potato masher.). Last five minutes – cook shrimp, and while shrimp cooks, slice an avocado, open the sour cream, and put everything on table.

Wednesday: Joy’s Creamy Green Pasta – a recipe from Meera Sodha’s vegan column in the Guardian. This was really good – everyone ate it- kind of like pesto, but creamy and more filling. The sauce is made of blanched spinach, silken tofu, nutritional yeast, miso, basil, parsley, lemon, olive oil. Served on rigatoni, which is a pasta new to me. I really loved how the sauce got into the rigatoni tubes. It was topped with an lemon olive mixture that made the whole things just taste so sunny. Vegan.

Thursday: Mac and cheese (from the blue box) and green beans. Quick dinner before the 8 year old’s concert.

Friday: Pizza and the Secret Lives of Pets. We’ve seen Secret Lives of Pets before and it is a much smarter movie than it sounds.

Saturday: Chinatown Express (for me and the 13 year old before going to the theatre) / Dumplings and green beans (at home for the Husband and the two younger kids.)

Sunday: Leftovers and snack dinner for simple Sunday dinner. I made the two little kids plates of cheese, crackers, pepperoni, cucumbers and apple slices. One of them said, “It’s like we’re having lunch for dinner!” I made myself flautas from the leftover beans from Taco Tuesday.

Hope this week features some sunshine for you!

Have you ever seen a “talkie” play? Any signs of Spring where you are? Did you make a March Madness bracket?

Weekly Recap + what we ate: When things go awry

The Daylights Savings Time change has kicked my butt this year. I’ve been going to bed too late, getting up too late. Luckily the kids were all early risers to start, so even though they’re getting up later than usual, they still have plenty of time to get ready in the morning. I think we are almost back on track now, though that 7:15am piano lesson on Wednesday of last week was brutal. This week I’m having the kids sleep in their “tomorrow” clothes on Tuesday night so it’s one less step in the morning before piano lessons.

Last week was my last week off contract before I start prepping the stage management department for another show. It ended up being very full. Monday I met up with a friend at the Duck Decoy Museum. It was kind of fun to revisit this museum, which we chose because it was roughly half way between my friend and me. It was nice to catch up, go for a stroll along the Chesapeake Bay and grab a bite to eat. My friend used to work in opera too; we started out in the business together – me as an intern and her as an Assistant Stage Manager. I’ve known her for over twenty years. We talked a lot about opera stuff and life stuff. It’s funny to see how some of the people we worked with when we were both just starting out are now pretty important in the opera world, some even running opera companies. My friend was a pretty big deal too, but is taking a step back to re-evaluate things. Sometimes I think back and feel so lucky that the colleagues I worked with twenty years ago are, twenty years later, still good friends.

That was the big adventure for the week. I spent most of the week going to appointments and prepping supertitles for a voice recital. I can be pretty efficient about prepping titles because it is a lot of steps and I like to have them done well in advance of the recital, but for some reason this time I just couldn’t focus and ended up doing it pretty last minute, which I don’t like. The was such an interesting recital program. There were songs in English, German, French, Chinese, Uhygur, Farsi, and Quechua (an indigenous language of Peru). Making those titles were certainly challenging. Even though the singer gives me the translations, I still have to match the translations to the music/text, which is hard to do without having even a basic understanding of the language. google Translate can help some, though the Quechua song was definitely tough. On a whole, though, the titles for this recital was a really fun challenge. This is the super nerdy part of doing supertitles that I like.

Funny story – twenty minutes before the recital, the pianist’s iPad wouldn’t turn on. All his music was on that iPad. I gather there was a lot of panic backstage and mad photo copying of music. You wouldn’t have guessed anything was off during the recital. Until we came to the last piece in the first half. They singer and pianist started the song. They got about half a page in, and then stopped. And the pianist looked at the audience and started speaking. He explained about the iPad not turning on and all the help they got to get a hold of the music for the program. But then, they didn’t realize until just this moment that the music he had been given for this last piece was in a different key than what they had rehearsed.

“If it was just a half step, or a whole step or even a third different, I would have just transposed it as we went,” he said, which made my head explode just a little bit. But I guess that’s why he’s a professional pianist. “But,” he went on, “the music is a a whole fourth higher and that’s beyond me. So I don’t know what to do.”

And the singer said, “Let’s just try it a fourth higher. I’ll sing it a fourth higher. And if that doesn’t work, we’ll come back with a different solution after intermission.”

For folks who aren’t musicians – a fourth higher is a HUGE difference. Vocally it just sits in a completely different place in the voice. It’s like the difference between Elphaba and Glinda. Or, I don’t know between a turkey and a hummingbird.

But they did it. The song still sounded great, just a different feel than if she had sung it in the lower key. At intermission, the pianist’s iPad started working again, so the second half proceeded without incident, but what a memorable recital it was. This was my last recital with this group for the season, and I’m a little sad that I won’t get to work on another recital until the fall.

Weekend – We are in a little lull with kids activities now that the 13 year old is done with basketball season and the 8 year old finished his goalkeeping clinic. There are still plenty of other activities but for the first time in ages, our afternoons were pretty open. I did things like fold laundry. We played board games on Saturday night – Taco Cat Goat Cheese Pizza while the Husband made dinner, and after dinner, we opened a game that Santa brought for Christmas. It’s called Flamecraft and the jury’s still out on this game. It has a billion pieces and takes a while to set up and each turn is a million steps. I kept pointedly asking the Husband, “Why did Santa think this game was a good idea?” Despite my grumbling, the family took to it. The premise is easy enough that the 8 and 5 year old could play, as long as we weren’t keeping score or trying to be strategic or anything. And the game is beautifully illustrated. The kids seemed to like it, so maybe it will stay in our rotation.

Sunday was more exciting than I wanted. After the 5 year old’s agility class, we went to a bakery to pick up some treats and then to the grocery store. As I was pulling into the Giant parking lot, I started to smell something funny and I thought maybe it was just that corner of the parking lot, but then I noticed all this smoke. I thought it was coming from my exhaust, but an elderly gentleman in the parking lot waved at me and yelled, “YOUR CAR IS OVER-HEATING!”

I pulled into a spot and called the Husband because I figured he would know what to do. But then the nice elderly gentleman knocked on my window and said, “Do you want me to take a look?” Now I very much believe in the grace of good Samaratian and said, “yes please!”

So we popped the hood of the car and there was all this smoke and water, which I guess means it really was steam that was coming out of my car. The elderly gentleman (who had the name Phil embroidered on his shirt – he was clearly coming from work) starts looking around. Then he makes a comment about what a cute little kid I have in my car. And I agree that she’s very cute and ask him if he has kids.

“Well,” he says to me, “I probably shouldn’t tell you this, but I’ve lived with four women in my life and I have grand kids ranging in age from 18 to 24. But I love kids.”

Then he noticed that the radiator hose had become disconnected. He asked me a bunch of questions and said, “You should get that check out. Did you call your husband?”

Now modern woman that I am, I had a moment of pause when he asked that. But then, I realized, Phil wasn’t wrong – the first call I made was to the Husband. Is it sexist if it’s true?

Phil went back to his car to get a pair of pliers so he could re-check the hose, but first he asked, “Can I give your daughter a toy?” I said yes, because I figured why not, and he comes back with a park of piers and a stuffed animal -a cat that squeaked when you squeezed it. Of course the 5 year old was delighted. (Side note- when the 13 year old found out that a random stranger had given the 5 year old a stuffed animal, she asked, “Is he trying to use her as a drug mule?” That made me laugh so hard.) Phil reattached the hose and told me to fill the coolant and take it to my mechanic immediately. And then my guardian angel was on his way.

Sunday afternoon, I had two friends over for lunch. These were the friends whom I went pottery painting with two weeks ago. Our pottery pieces were done, so one friend picked them up and they came over for lunch and pottery hand off. I thought my flower pot turned out very cute:

Before
After!

For lunch, I made a batch of the blogger favorite curry chick pea salad, which we ate with olive bread and cucumbers. One of my friends brought some pastries from a new Asian American bakery, Rose Ave., and the pastries were divine. My favorite was the Ube cream Queen Aman. Queen Aman is one of my favorite pastries, and to add ube cream… so delicious.

After the friends left, the Husband and I tried to go out to look at blinds and mattresses, two things we are in dire need of. But the blind place closed early on Sundays and the Macy’s near us didn’t have mattresses. Bummer. Feeling a little defeated, we didn’t know what to do and were going to head straight home. But then we decided to go to the Botanical Gardens instead. So we had a nice walk through the park to the gardens and back. The gardens are still very brown and grey, but there are bits of colour starting to pop up and it made for a nice pick me up. Also, exciting was that we left the kids at home to do this. Now that the oldest is legally old enough to stay home with the two little kids, the Husband and I have on occasion gone out to run errands or what not, just the two of us. It’s been so amazing to be able to walk out the door without a kid in tow. Milestones!

Speaking of things gone awry (because things always happen in 3) – After my fall while running last week, I noticed something interesting. I didn’t cut my chin, but it did start to scab over. I’m not sure what is up with that? Also after a couple days, my chin started to bruise really really badly. Like it looked like I rubbed my chin in graphite in an ill attempt to draw a goatee on myself. It was pretty distinct. I was a little self conscious about it and thought, maybe I should cover it up with make-up. But that would require buying make-up and figuring out how to use it. I had no interest in any of that. So I just let the chin get blacker and bluer and went on with life. I did have a thought that I should just head people off at the pass and reference it first – “How are you doing?” “Oh, you know – ” vague hand wave ” – just a little accident. Ugh. How are you?” But I just let it be.

What fascinated me was there were people who would ask my about my black and blue chin and the people who didn’t say anything. And I’m not talking about strangers in the street. These were people who I see every day and are friendly with. I’m sure there’s no correlation here for those who asked “WHAT HAPPENED???” and those who didn’t say anything. But it did get me thinking about whether or not I would say something if I saw someone with a huge wound? I mean when I see a friend or colleague come in with a boot or crutches, I usually will ask what happened. But would it make a difference it’s on the face? Do people have the same internal monologue as I do? “Ooh that looks bad. i hope they’re okay. Will I make them self-conscious if I say something? Should I let them reference it first? I don’t want to pretend nothing is going on – I might seem unobservant or uncaring…” Or maybe it’s just me and most people if they don’t say anything just didn’t notice? There’s no right or wrong answer here, of course; just something that was rattling around in my brain this week.

Grateful For:

-Seeing the first spring flowers coming up. Hyacinths along our front walk.

-Basketball courts at the park and a body that still can shoot a basket. A couple days last week, I met the 13 year old at the basketball courts after school and we shot baskets for 30-45 minutes. Is there anything as satisfying as making a basket? I’m bad enough at basketball that it still gives me a little rush every time the ball sails though the hoop.

-Clean sheets on my bed.

-My father’s help with the Chinese songs in the recital program that I worked on. There was one song in Chinese and the English text I got was matched to Chinese characters, but the music had pin yin (the romanization of the characters), so I couldn’t match the English to the music. I sent the Mandarin text to my dad, and he talked me through the characters so that I could match the English translation to the pin yin in the score. I’m so glad I had him for help.

-For that matter – I’m really grateful that my parents spoke Mandarin to me when I was a a child. My Mandarin isn’t great, but I can get by, and I did notice when we were in Taiwan it got easier with each day. When I was prepping for the recital last week, once I heard the Chinese songs being sung, I understood enough of the words that I knew I was on the right track. I can only read a handful of characters and would loved to read/write more, but it’s a really hard language to learn. But I’m really grateful that I have a little bit of the language in me. Also grateful for the little French that I have. It’s enough that I can help the 8 year old with his homework. Every time I heard people speaking Mandarin or French out and about and maybe understand some of it, I think about how cool languages are and how neat it is that people communicate. Also I found this super interesting about what animals sound like in different languages.

-Friends that invite the 13 year old out to shows and to shoot hoops. I know it’s hard for her to always be tied to activities that her younger siblings can take part in, so I’m grateful when she has friends (and their parents) that invite her out and come pick her up and bring her home. This week, she had invites to go play basketball t the Rec Center and to see a concert at a local high school. These things would have been hard for us to take the little kids to so I’m grateful that she has friends that include her in plans. Also I think it’s nice to switch up the dynamic between the kids once in a while by having it be just one or two kids at home.

-This green messenger bag:

We bought this bag 13 years ago to use as a diaper bag when the oldest child was born. At the time the options for diaper bags were kind of frilly and pretty and the Husband wanted something gender neutral and utilitarian. So we went to REI and this bag had all the features we wanted. This bag has gone on so many trips with us, on flights, over oceans. And it’s still in great shape. Anyhow, ironically, I had been using an old diaper bag to carry my laptop around. The diaper bag had been an impulse purchase – it had been on super sale and looked really cute, but when it arrived it wasn’t super functional as a diaper bag so I put it in a closet for years until I realized that it actually fit my laptop perfectly. So I’ve been using that yellow diaper bag for my laptop. Anyhow after many years, the faux leather on the yellow diaper bag is starting to flake so I decided it was time to retire it, and I just started carrying my laptop around in a tote bag, which isn’t great. Then last week, I was cleaning out a closet and I unearthed the green messenger bag that had been living in the closet for a couple year what with COVID and the kids being out of diapers and all that. Well the green messenger/former diaper bag was perfect for fitting my lap top and it has now been put back into service. I’m just a little tickled that for years I used a diaper bag for my laptop and a messenger bag for a diaper bag. And now it feels like life has come full circle. (Also – I do NOT miss the days when leaving the house required packing as if for an Arctic expedition – food, toys, diapers, wipes, change of clothes…. So much simpler to leave the house now, though the Husband will say that I still pack too much to leave the house. But he’s a guy and perhaps doesn’t believe in having emergencies outside the house.)

-Phil who helped me with my car in the Giant parking lot and gave the 5 year old a stuffed animal.

Looking Forward To:

-The 8 year old’s French concert this week. Every year, all the French Immersion classes at his school put on a concert where each class sings a song. It’s pretty cute. I do have to find the kid a pair of black pants. But he has first communion later this year and I’m told he needs black pants for that too, so hoepfully I can find somethign he can wear more than once.

-Peak Bloom! There is an updated prediction for peak bloom – it is now predicted for March 28th – 31st. I’m not yet in rehearsal, so I think I should be able to go see the cherry blossoms at some point.

-New glasses! I finally made an appointment with the eye doctor, updated my prescription. I am VERY near sighted, the optometrist said. I knew that, but I think I’ve gotten even worse since my last appointment…. three years ago. Luckily my far sightedness has remained about the same, so I didn’t bother to get new sunglasses since I use those just for driving. I chose new every day glasses, that I’m kind of excited about – they have red rims. They aren’t as bold as I wanted, but I need nose pads on my glasses, and that limits the options. At any rate, the new glasses will arrive in two weeks and I’m really excited because I currently can’t distinguish betwen 6 and 8 on my crossword puzzle squares and THIS IS IMPORTANT.

-Listening to this audiobook:

Hearing Dame Judi Dench’s words (she doesn’t actually read her own part, Barbara Flynn does, doing a remarkable job), as she talks about the plays of Shakespeare is both hilarious and revelatory. Highly recommend for any Shakespeare or theatre enthusiasts.

What We Ate:
Monday: Mac and Cheese and hot dogs.

Tuesday: Chicken mole tacos. I made this mole sauce from Rick Bayless. It made so much mole sauce, that I froze three jars and I can’t wait to eat more. It makes for a super easy meal – poach chicken thighs for 15 minutes, shredded and tossed it with the mole sauce. Tortillas, home made pico de gallo, sour cream, and avocado.

Wednesday: Fried catfish sandwiches. The Husband cooked.

Thursday: Pork and eggplant stir fry with noodles. The husband Cooked. This was very tasty.

Friday: I was working so I had a salad at the work cafeteria. And a chocolste chip cookie. They have the best chocolate chip cookies at work. The family at home had take out pizza, wings, and watched Sleeping Beauty.

Saturday: Breakfast sandwiches, cucumbers, and fruit.

Sunday: Tortellini and gnocchi. Some with red sauce some plain.

Hope you have a lovely week. Has anything gone awry for you lately?

Weekly Recap + what we ate: Five years ago

I had a thought that I should write a list of gentle aspirations for March, but then I realized that I accomplished NONE of my gentle aspirations for February. So if you want to know what’s on my March Goals list, you can just go back and read the February list. It’s all the same stuff. I just never did it last month. I take that back – we did get the kids to write Valentine’s Day cards. And I did make it to one of the 13 year old’s middle school basketball game. (Though that might have actually been this month and not last month.)

So mid March 2020 was when we all retreated from public life. Well, those of us who weren’t considered “essential”. The five year anniversary of the start of the COVID pandemic is making me reflect on those times. I’ve been struggling to put my thoughts into words, but then Daria had a lovely reflective post, prompted by this podcast, and I’m going to use her questions. I guess for my purposes, I think of the thick of the pandemic as being from March 12th 2020, when my show was cancelled up til probably September 2022, when it felt like we were doing opera again, albeit with masks and precautions in place.

Watching for the trash truck! Highlight of the week.

What do you remember most?
I remember being home with my kids a lot, and not being able to go to work. So many people in my industry pivoted and started producing opera/theatre online or in other venues. At the time, I had a six month old, a three year old, and a 8 year old. I couldn’t think beyond just keeping everyone going at home and struggled to figure out how to have structure in our days. Thank goodness for the internet. Other things I remember, off the top of my head:
-sewing masks as part of a church mission
-pumping and donating breastmilk
-lots of cardboard box creations
-struggling with online schooling for the oldest child and not knowing how hard to be on her for constantly surfing the internet when she should be paying attention in class
-Lots of time outdoors. Exploring new parks and trails.
-RBG dying and taking the two girls down to pay respects.
-The Husband being at home for a little bit, setting up a desk and computer wherever he could and then going back to the office the moment they let him. (I don’t blame him on that one.)
-The Husband doing all the grocery shopping so that we could limit contact.
-taking a drawing class online – it was such a great creative and social outlet.
-Borrowing so many books from the library. The library setting up a system to request books for pick up.
-Masks. Wearing masks. I remember the first time I put on a mask. I was in line at Costco and I thought, “Well, here goes. I should probably put this mask on.” It felt like a big step, admitting that there really was something going on.
-Once we started producing opera again, arguing with singers about, “Yes, you do have to wear a mask in rehearsal.”
-The not knowing when things would end. What “end” even meant.
-So much time together as a family.
-Figuring out Zoom. Having a Zoom birthday party for the Husband.
-The vaccine, finally getting vaccinated.
-The youngest participating in a vaccine trial.
-The show we did in May 2022 when people were still getting COVID in large numbers and every performance there would be a list with all the people who were out that night. Even the stage manager got COVID and I had to bump up to call the show and we called every available stage manager we knew to come in and cover my assistant stage manager track, and ended up with a patchwork of stage managers to cover the run. There was one show where no one was available for the whole evening, so we just hired someone to cover my track for the first half of the show. That to me was just bonkers – that we had a sub come in for half a show.

What led up to here?
I remember in February hearing about a virus that was proving deadly and spreading quickly, but it was not yet in our county. And then on March 12th, suddenly being aware of this phrase, “social distancing.” I asked my co-worker, “What does social distancing mean anyway?” And she didn’t know and we went on with our tech session. We were in the theatre at the time, in tech for an opera that I was very excited to work on. It was the day of our first orchestra rehearsal onstage and we were at the theatre that afternoon setting lighting levels. On a break, my co-worker came up to me and said, “Six feet.”
“What?” I asked, having forgotten our earlier conversation.
“Social distancing is six feet apart.”
Okay, I thought, I can do that. And then a couple hours later, my big boss came into the theatre where we all were working on lighting cues and said that the show was being cancelled and we should all go home.
And the next day, we were told that the schools would be closed for two weeks.
And that’s how it all started for us.
And then I made the mistake of going to Costco on March 14th. That trip took two hours and I couldn’t get paper towels or eggs.

Who went through this with you?
My family- the Husband and the three kids. My mother, who had planned to come help out with the new baby for one month and ended up staying with us for five. My mom’s group, via Zoom and masked distanced walks. My friend K, who decided that we needed a weekly socially distanced happy hour. All the teachers and educators who taught kids through zoom. My online art class. The whole world. I think that’s what was amazing about this is that it was world wide. Everyone experienced it differently, but we all experienced it.

Where did you go through this event?
At home. In the kitchen. In the dining room. In the living room. In our backyard. At parks. On hiking trails. At mass vaccination sites. At drive through testing sites. And eventually, back at the theatre.

How did you feel then?
Bewildered and numb – I was just waiting for someone to tell me what to do and I tried not to think about things too much. Angry. I was angry a lot at the people around me for not being easier to live with. Frustrated with the sameness of every day. Grateful. Grateful for the things that did come to us, grateful for the ways that we could isolate and be our own bubble. Grateful that the Husband could still work. Grateful that my mother was with us and toilet trained the middle child. Tired. I had a six month old who had to be nursed to sleep at the time. Worried. For my grandfather who didn’t believe in vaccines. For my father living on his own because my mother was with us. Happy too, though, that we could still have some good times and adventures.

What changed in your world?
Well, I couldn’t go to work anymore and was home all the time with the kids. That was probably the big thing. But also I think there was a re-thinking in my industry about work-life balance. People who were getting burnt out from going from gig to gig to gig without a pause started to take a step back and ask if it was all worth it. There was a mass exodus of mid-career stage managers from the industry.
I think also, we became more aware of the health of people around us – I’ll always remember the quote I heard, “It used to be we coughed to cover up a fart. Now we fart to cover up a cough.” I think we became much more aware of how to stay healthy in large groups of people – masks, hand washing, covering coughs and sneezes, staying home if you’re sick. I mean we should already have been doing this but it became downright uncivilized if one didn’t do it in the wake of the pandemic.

What changed in you?
I always find these questions hard because I feel I lack the self awareness to really answer it. I don’t really think of myself on a pre-ordained path, so I don’t really see it as changing. I kind of see myself as flowing and bending as life goes on and there was a lot of flow and bend in 2020-2022
Here’s one thing – I stopped worrying about the oldest kid’s grades. (I was actually interviewed for a story in the Washington Past about this) I realized that in elementary school I just wanted her to be learning, and I had to stop caring about the A. I’m a little more concerned about her grades now that she is in middle school, I will admit, but the pandemic gave me a good insight into my expectations for elementary school.
I wouldn’t really call this a change, but I also had to shift my mind from being a work out of the house mom to being a stay at home mom. That took a bit of adjustment. But I was also glad for the time with the baby because I had gone back to work when she was just a week old, and I hadn’t really had time with her.

What good came out of this event?
I think we learned that family is important. That as long as we were stuck in this thing together, things would be okay.
One thing work-wise that came out of this was I started to do supertitle work. It was one of the first jobs that was offered me when my company started doing opera again. I hadn’t really thought about doing supertitle work before and it turns out I actually love it.
When I did come back to work, working from home was acceptable. I remember going back to work after having a baby in 2017 and 2019 and asking if I could work, from home on the days I didn’t have to be in rehearsal or at the theatre and it was like pulling teeth. But after the pandemic, it was something that everyone was allowed to do. Well until now.
I started a blog. Yup, this here is a pandemic blog, started in April 2020. And this blog has been a wonderful outlet for all the things in my head, and has also lead to my discovering a great community of people who also share what’s knocking around in their heads.
I started running. When the local Taiwan School opened up for Sunday Mandarin classes again, I enrolled the middle child. The last time we took language classes at the Taiwan School, parents had to sit in the classrooms, but in September 2021, they did not let parents sit in the classrooms anymore. So I had 90 minutes of time to kill while the middle child was in class. I decided to start running. I didn’t really have much of an exercise routine before that, maybe some yoga and a few post-partum fitness classes. But I figured I was approaching my mid 40s and I should start something. I don’t love running, but it’s a pretty low barrier for entry, so I do it. And I usually feel better when I do.

What would you do differently?
I don’t know that I have a good answer to this questions, because I think we all did the best we could with the information we had. I guess one thing is I would try harder to reach out to friends. We had good friends whom we didn’t see for a whole year, and they live two miles away. I think I would have tried harder to reach out even in a distanced way. I loved our little family unit, but I think it’s also important to nurture all relationships, to check in on people, form connections.

How do you feel about the pandemic now?
I think back on 2020-2022 and it feels a little surreal to me that we went through that. That the world got quiet and empty. That there were special early morning shopping hours at the grocery store for the immunocompromised. That people really became innovative about how to do the things that they were used to doing. When I think of historic milestones that I’ve lived through, there’s 9/11 and there’s the COVID pandemic. I also think right now in America also feels a bit like a historic moment as well with the dismantling of the Federal government. All these events have that same sense of bewilderment and confusion and upheaval. March 13th will always be a “Where were you when…” moment for me.
One thing that the current climate is making me realize, though, is just how much kindness and community materialized when we couldn’t gather. There were certainly events of hate and fear during COVID, but there was a reaction to it, a sense that people wanted to set things right. I don’t get that sense right now. Right now I feel as if America is dividing from each other and the rest of the world.
It’s funny, we were trying to explain the pandemic to the two younger kids the other day. They have no memory of those years, but the oldest was 8 at the time and very much remembers it. I asked her to tell her younger siblings about it, and she said, “The pandemic was the most amazing time. We got to stay home all the time and be together and watch lots of tv and screens.” I think that’s a good perspective to remember – even though it was such a stressful and anxious time for me, the 8 year old was actually loving life. I do wonder what will be the legacy of that two and a half years of pandemic life.

Where we started – March 2020
Where we got to – Sept. 2022

Funny Story – This morning as I was driving the kids to piano lessons, we passed the beltway, which at 7:15 in the morning was already bumper to bumper. “Look,” I said, “All those people going to their office.”

“Are they going to print things?” asked the 5 year old.

“No, they’re going to work,” I replied.

“Oh,” she said, a little confused. “And then they will go back to their houses?”

“Well, no. They now they have to work in their office.”

“Oh. That’s silly,” she said.

I think about all the ways the world changed, has changed. I mean the world is always changing, right? But it seems like there have been some big shifts in the past five years. The 5 and 8 year old don’t really know a world where going to the office every day was the norm for most people, even though the Husband does it. They don’t think twice if they are asked to put on a mask when they are cough-y. They submit to nose swabs and shots without a second thought. I feel like these little things are what part of what remain of those years we spent in lockdown, even for people who don’t remember it.

On that note, I’m leaving you with this, which made me laugh out loud and then I sent it to all my friends who are trying to do all the things while pretending everything is fine:

I don’t actually have Instagram, so excuse the weird screen shot, but it’s from Emotional Club’s Instagram feed.

Grateful For:

-Whatsapp calling and friends. I have a friend who moved to Oman because her husband works in the foreign service and was posted there. They’re halfway through their posting and I really miss her. We’ve been texting back and froth frequently, but this week we decided to have a phone call, which we did through Whatsapp. It was amazing! We talked for 90 minutes, catching up on all the things.

-After school park time. Sunshine and warmer weather.

-That I’m okay after a fall. I tripped on my run through the woods and fell face down on a huge smooth slab of rock. I for sure thought that I was going to be a bloody mess, but I wasn’t, luckily. I was a little sore and shaken, but otherwise okay. 24 hours later, my chin is black and blue and looks awful, but at least I didn’t have to get stitches or knock out my teeth or anything.

-On that note – I’m grateful that I started back up with running. I want three times (well, two and a half – I kind of abandoned the third run after that fall) and it wasn’t that painful. Last year I ran all through the winter, even in 20 degree weather, but I didn’t have the will to do it this year. It feels nice to be back at it after a break, though.

-Cake! I made another cake. This one was an Old Fashioned Donut Bundt Cake. It tasted just like a cake donut. If you like cake donuts, make this cake! Sign of the time- I had originally planned to make another cake, but that cake called for six eggs. What with eggs being expensive still, I decided to make this cake that only took four. And even then I asked myself if that was a good use of eggs. It was.

-The 13 year old’s basketball coach. Basketball season is over and I’m really grateful for the coach and referees that made the season possible.

-High School Musicals – We went to the high school production of the musical The Secret Garden this weekend. It was SOOOOOO good! The Secret Garden is my favorite musical and I figured that would either make seeing a high school production either a blissful experience or a grin-and-bear-it experience. Here’s the thing about this musical – The music is gorgeous, so heartbreakingly beautiful. Also it’s not easy and it’s very exposed and the ensembles are tricky. You have to know how to sing to pull it off – none of this sort of speak-sing stuff that you can maybe get away with with some other musicals. The kids in this show had such beautiful voices. And so much spunk and personality onstage. And the production was so well put together – some minor technical difficulties as one would expect at this level, but nothing major. And there were some really lovely directing choices. I think it’s going to be one of my favorite theatre experiences this year.

-The smell of witch hazel blooming in our front yard. That floral spicy smell greeting me as I come home.

-Finding just the right books. I popped by the Library’s used bookstore last week. I had meant to donate a bag of books, only the paper bag split as I was taking it to the car and the I could only find parking in the far parking lot and didn’t want to carry all those books in a split paper bag to the used bookstore. So I’ll deal with that another time. But as long as I was there, I figured I’d do some browsing and I lucked out because I found two books that were on my “want to find” list. One is Nelson Mandela’s memoir that I want to read in anticipation of a trip to South Africa later this year, and the other book is the memoir of Renee Fleming that I wanted to to get for the 13 year old because Fleming is her favorite opera singer. It’s my lucky day! I also picked up two comic strip collections because the kids really love reading those- one Calvin and Hobbes and one for The Boondocks. Does anyone remember the Boondocks? It was this hilariously edgy comic strip from the early 2000s.

Looking Forward To:
-Lenten Reading Group. Last year a friend invited me to a Lenten reading group and even though I’m not what anyone would call religious, I did enjoy doing the readings and thinking about how we can function with grace and kindness towards ourselves and other human beings. The group is meeting again this year, just three times, but I’m looking forward to it. The readings so far have seemed very apt in the times that we live in.

-Voice recital this week for which I’m doing super titles. It’s an eclectic program with lots of contemporary pieces and five or six different languages.

-Reading my library haul. After hitting up the library bookstore, I went to the library to pick up a hold and ended up coming away with a whole new stack of books to read and a cookbook:

What We Ate:
Monday: Swede and Red Lentil Soup. I had a rutabaga that our friend had passed a long to us from his CSA. Hot tip – googling recipes for “swede” (what the British call the Rutabaga) yields much more interesting (to me) recipes than googling “rutabaga”. I really liked this soup. I was the only one, though. Thankfully I made a batch of no-knead bread to go with it so people were still happy with dinner. Vegan. Except some of us put butter on the bread.

Tuesday: Shrimp Tacos from New York Times Cooking. This was a surprisingly fast dinner – it was on the table in about twenty minutes. And with this meal we finished up the 6lb 13oz cabbage.

Wednesday: Salmon with Miso Rice and Ginger Scallion Vinaigrette from New York Times Cooking. First day of Lent, so a meat free dinner. This was really tasty and simple. Everyone liked it. Except one child who screamed that they didn’t like salmon and why didn’t I make catfish. But then proceeded to eat the rice with their hands. I don’t bother to make food that the kids will like because this is the sh*t I have to put up with. If I’m going to get yelled at, I might as well like the food that I’m eating.

Thursday: Sheet Pan Veggie Shawarma that I’ve seen linked on Suzanne’s blog. When I was reading this recipe, it struck me that it was very similar to the delicious Kabocha Squash and Apple Shawarma recipe that I got in my Purple Carrot meal box one time. So I added apples to the original recipe and made a zhoug sauce to go with it all. It was delicious. Except the 5 and 8 year olds who said they didn’t like vegetables so I told them they could make their own peanut butter and jelly sandwiches, which they did. Good, more Shawarma for me! Vegan.

Friday: Pizza (The Husband made) and Glee.

Saturday: Pasta Salad made from Jenny Rosenstrach’s marinated beans as a base. Then I add tomatoes, cucumbers, pasta, and red onion. Vegan. Only once again some child rebelled and they had pasta with butter and parmesan cheese for dinner.

Sunday: leftovers and Ramen. Sunday is one of those days when I get to six o’clock and realize that, yes indeed the kids do need to eat dinner. At least the younger kids. The 13 year old fends for herself because she has evening swim clinic and needs to eat on the early side. So Sunday was ramen because it’s easy and fast. I added vegetables (the last of some napa cabbage that was in the fridge) and eggs to the ramen, and for my own bowl, I threw in a bunch of kimchi.

I hope you are having a lovely week. We are battling the time change here, but every day is better and there is more sunlight at the end of the day now.
Are you reflecting on the early days of the COVID pandemic now that it’s been 5 years? If you could tell March 2020 you something, what would it be? How would you describe those times to someone who didn’t have to live through it?


Weekly recap + what we ate: President’s Day, and mundane bathroom things

Last week started with a day off for President’s Day and it was such a lovely day… Nothing terribly special or unique. Not big adventures. Just a really nice day at home. The best thing, though, is I had the two little kids make to do lists for the day, a combination of things that I wanted them to do and things that they wanted to do with their day at home. I’m a firm believer that a good day is a combination of fun and productive activities. The kids seemed to really get into having little Post It lists of tasks and getting to check things off:

The one on the left is the 8 year old’s list and the one on the right is the 5 year old’s list.

We started the day in a leisurely fashion – I did some yoga. The Husband fed the kids breakfast. The after breakfast we cleaned the living room and did some general puttering around the house. We’re still struggling to find a good routine for keeping the house tidy. The tidy habits just aren’t there with me or the kids, but if we leave things to tidy at the end of the day it gets quite out of control.

Then we had lunch – reheated pizza, I’m sure. Because that’s what we always eat for lunch at home. After lunch we went on a walk/bike ride to the park. I love that we live walking distance to a playground and a trail. And since it was a holiday weekend, the parkway parrallel to the trail was closed to car traffic, so the kids had a nice long uninterrupted stretch of road to ride on. We walked from the closest playground to the next one down on the trail and played there for about half an hour before coming home.

After we got home, we watched Wonka- how luxurious does it feel to have an afternoon family movie “night”? After the movie – cute, entertaining, but not particularly memorable, I felt – I made dinner. After dinner, the 13 year old went to basketball and the 5 year old took a shower while the 8 year old worked on his Black History Month project – a poster about Barak Obama. (This is the “Barack Obama” that is on his to do Post It above. I have to say, helping the 8 year old research Barack Obama made me kind of wistful. And really really really sad about the current state of affairs in Washington D.C.) Then we had some family reading time before bed for the two younger kids. We haven’t been reading out loud together as much as we used to – we’ve been going to be so late that it’s usually just pjs, brush teeth, then lights out and cuddles. Sometimes I’ll put on a story podcast for them while we cuddle, but I’m really missing reading outloud from a chapter book. I should try to find a way to put that back into our schedule.

All in all, though, it felt like a really good day – a nice balance of relaxing fun, outdoor fun, and house/life admin. Sometimes I think when we have these family days off, we should try to do something special, but you know what, just a regular leisurely day at home is pretty special too. I don’t think we got in the car until it was time to take the oldest kid to basketball clinic. I do like having a car-free day.

The rest of the week was business as usual – school, activities, etc. I had a super title gig for a recital that featured a lot of beautiful German music and two arias by Handel. I love Handel, so that was a particular treat. One interesting thing about this recital is that the singer did his own translations. Usually when I’m given translations to made into supertitle slides, the singer has pulled them from somewhere else and sometimes they need to be massaged a little bit in order to make good title slides. But this singer, impressively translated everything himself and it was quite well done – no massaging needed.

Mundane Bathroom Things…This next bit was inspired by Elisabeth’s post last month asking for shampoo recommendations. Her post got me thinking how I’m probably the worst person to give recs for personal care products. I started listing in my head all the personal care products I use and it all seemed rather… haphazard…. Through a combination of good genes and apathy, I find myself with a pretty minimal body/face/skin care routine, mostly relying on whatever is around the house. Anyhow, I started going through the list of all the personal care products and items I use regularly and thought it might be the kind of mundane snapshot of life that I’ll be super interested in reading about twenty years from now. Also it might be stupefyingly boring. (If this seems the latter to you, feel free to scroll down to this week’s FIGS.)

Glimpse inside our medicine cabinet. What’s with the ridiculous number of deodorants??? There aren’t that many stinky armpits in the house. Also I seem to be stockpiling eyeglass cleaner. I’m glad I took this picture- it’s inspiring me to do a little clean out. Note the old fashioned ice pack on the top shelf. I love the thing but can never get to it in time when someone needs ice.

Let’s talk about showering – I don’t shower every day. I don’t even shower every other day. I usually shower three times a week. Less if I’m not going into work regularly. Showering is just kind of a lot of work to me. So my preference, though, is to shower at night. Things I use in the shower:

-Soap: Dial bar soap. This is what the Husband uses, so it’s what we have in the house and therefore what I use.

-Shampoo: I used to use Soap and Salve bar shampoo and an apple cidar vinegar rinse. I thought it might be better for the environment because there was no plastic involved, except for the old peri bottle I used for the vinegar. But the shampoo is not that easy to get and I realized that ordering it online hardly makes it good for the environment. So I just started using whatever kids’ shampoo was in the shower. I used to use the 13 year old’s Pantene (which is the shampoo of choice because we can buy it at Costco), but then she started showering in the downstairs bathroom and took her shampoo with her. So… now I just use whatever the little kids use because it’s there. Currently we use Everyone 3-in-1 soap (Body wash, bubble bath, and shampoo.)

-Conditioner: Pantene – but only if I’m showering downstairs in the 13 year old’s shower and it’s there. Otherwise no conditioner.

-Washcloth. Sometimes. Only if there’s already one in the shower. But even then, I never know who used it last so usually I don’t bother.

-Tubshroom. Not personal care per se, this is a little silicone insert that you put in the drain and it catches hair. I do lose a lot of hair in the shower and this thing is invaluable in keeping the hair from clogging the drains. Or at least keeping it from quickly clogging the drains. We still do have to have our drain snaked about once a year.

After Shower Things I use:
-Towel – I have a favorite towel that I’ve been using for probably twenty years. I took it from my parent’s house when I moved out. I love it because it is large, bath sheet sized, but it isn’t thick, so it’s easy to manipulate it to dry off and then I can wrap my hair in it. I get very grumpy if it is in the wash when I want to shower. (Thank you to my Husband to washing my towel, even when he doesn’t tell me he’s doing it ahead of time…)

-Q-tips. i know! they say don’t use q-tips in your ears, but I hate having wet ears.

-Cetaphil body cream – must moisturize after shower. I’m pretty brand loyal about this. I usually get it at Costco because I can buy two giant containers at a time and not have to think about it again for a year.

-Turbie twist, to dry my hair after I towel dry it. I hate walking around with wet hair. When I shower at night, I’ll usually sleep with my hair in the Turbie Twist because it gives my hair a bit of volume in the morning when it is dried.

-Deodorant – not shower specific as usually I only use deoderant if I’m going out in public. I don’t tend to bother with deodorant for hanging out at home. I’ve been using Native lilac and white tea lately, because it smells nice and supposedly is free of aluminum and parabens. Is it really better? Who knows. Everyone’s body chemistry is different so I feel like there’s no magic solution.

-Hair dryer – I prefer to let my hair air dry, but if I happen to shower in the morning and then have to go to work, I’ll blow dry it before I leave the house. I’ve had the Revlon 1875 Ionic hair dryer for over ten years. It was whatever Consumers Report recommended at the time.

Before bed:
-tooth brush – I’m currently using a Dr. Suess kid’s toothbrush. What can I say? It was what was in the toothbrush bin when I had to replace my last toothbrush. Shockingly – I always brush at night, but don’t always manage a morning brush. If I brush in the morning, I prefer to do it first thing because a dentist friend told me that the morning is when there is the most amount of bacteria in one’s mouth.

-Toothpaste – Aquafresh Extreme Clean – I’m actually pretty picky about this. This is the only toothpaste I’ll use if given a choice. Everything else tastes like cotton candy to me.

-Floss – Oral B Glide – this was recommended by the dentist because my teeth are pretty tightly packed together and other floss just shreds when I try to use it.

(I know I should wash my face at night, but I don’t wear make-up, so I don’t feel particular urgency about face washing. If I feel the need to wash my face, I’ll just do a wet washcloth and water.)

Other stuff in my bathroom that gets regular use:
-to clean my glasses, whatever glasses spray came with my glasses from the place I got my glasses. I’m pretty sure it’s just Windex in a branded spray bottle.
-Aquaphor – for every thing that feels dry. Usually my lips, often times my hands if I have an eczema breakout. Also slathered on our faces before we go out when the air is super cold and biting.
-Steroid ointment for my eczema. okay, truth, this tube of prescription ointment is at least eight years old, but it is huge and it still works to calm my eczema when it gets bad. Perhaps I should go back to my dermatologist and get a new prescription, but I am terrible about doctors.
-Lip balm – Aquaphor Lip Repair Stick. Love that this stuff keeps my lips from feeling dry without being too thick or sticky.
-Sunscreen – I use whatever I have for the kids. I had a fancy sun screen last summer, but it made my skin sting and burned whenever I got it in my eyes, so I went back to just using whatever I get for the kids – usually Think Baby or Aveeno, or Coppertone. Last year at some point, I also discovered the amazingness that is spray on sunscreen. That was life changing. I only use sunscreen in the summer, though. I should probably use it all the time.
-period pads – These days it’s the Cora brand, but I’ll usually just pick up whatever cotton topsheet pads I can find at Target.
-period underwear – technically in my bedroom, not bathroom, but it spends a lot of time in my bathroom.
-diaper sprayer. We installed this when we were using cloth diapers, and it actually continues to be quite useful even though we have been diaper free for three years now. I use it to rinse my period underwear, spraying it right in the toilet. Also I will on occasion use the diaper sprayer to rinse by nether regions, kind of like a bidet, but not.
-Kleenex. Always Kleenex brand. NEVER the lotion kind. That just smears when I try to clean my glasses.
-Toilet Paper – Charmin. We are pretty brand loyal to toilet paper. I got us the Kirkland brand one time and there was a meltdown when the TP fell apart as a butt was being wiped. I had to give away the rest of the 24 roll pack. And now we just get the Charmin.
-Advil.
-Hand Soap. Soft Soap because we buy that in bulk at Costco, and I love our soap dispenser that I got a year and a half ago at a sale by a local pottery group:

What I don’t have is any make up because I don’t wear any. I might have some that I keep on hand in case I want to do my face for opening night, but I never really want to make the effort, and I figure I’m just standing around in the dark all night – no one cares what I look like. I guess if I do have any make-up lying around it’s got to be at least five years old. I should probably find that and throw it out.

Whew – I guess it is a long list after all. I didn’t even list most of the stuff in the medicine/linen closet in the bathroom. Like the first aid/medicines that we keep in the bathroom, but I figure that’s not stuff I use regularly. Also didn’t list out the contents of the hair accessories drawer, but that’s because my hair is in a short phase so I don’t usually use the hair ties or clips right now. So there’s a snapshot of one corner of my life in February 2025.

Grateful For: my weekly collection of things I’m grateful for. This month, I’m recording extra gratitudes to add to Elisabeth’s FIG Collective I’ve loved reading everyone one’s FIGs this month.

-Paths and parks.

-School Bus Drivers. One day the 8 year old’s bus was 30 minutes late. Turns out there were some additions to the bus driver’s earlier route that caused trickle down delays. As annoyed as I was to be standing in the cold for 30 minutes waiting for the bus, I’m really grateful to school bus drivers for getting kids to and from school safely. That can’t be an easy job.

-Kids reading to each other:

-That my thyroid is fine. Last year I had a thyroid ultrasound to rule out any issues related to my abnormal period. There was a “not-concerning, but maybe you should have it checked out” nodule. At the time, the ENT said my thyroid is fine, but to schedule a six month follow up. (I guess my abnormal period is just called “being in my mid-forties”.) I had my follow up this week and everything looks fine. There continue to be nodules on my thyroid, but they seems to come and go and are small, so I have another follow up in a year, but no one is concerned.

-Sunshine.

-All the things that make a good morning – healthy breakfast (sweet potato, black beans, cilantro, and scallions), hot tea, a good book, and the crossword puzzle. And fifteen minutes to enjoy it all in peace:

My morning happy place. When it happens.

-Fleece-lined pants. I know I keep mentioning this one, but they are truly life changing.

-It’s Cadbury mini egg season!!!! How much do I love Cadbury mini eggs? The crisp crunchy shell. The smooth sweet chocolate inside. The perfect little size to pop into my mouth. The fact that they are only available once a year. Rejoice! It is Cadbury mini egg season. Oh a discovery! The other day I had some Cadbury mini eggs while sipping my tea and it made my tea taste like a chocolate chai. In light of my M&M conundrum, I am hiding these from the kids.

-That the 8 year old did his homework without either of us having a meltdown.

-A quiet theatre before a performance. The promise of a beautiful evening of music. I think one of my favorite moments of my job is that half hour before a show starts, when everything is in place to begin, and the air back stage is one of quiet anticipation and preparation. I love that energy.

-Laundry freshly washed and hung up to dry, scenting the air with the smell of detergent.

-The five year old’s sassy sense of style:

-Music, played loudly in the car with everyone singing along and bopping to the beat.

-The six pound cabbage. We have a friend who gives us his CSA when he is out of town. Last week, he brought over a HUGE cabbage. Like bigger-than-my- head huge. I put it on the scale to see how much it weigh. Friends, this cabbage weighed more than any of my children at birth. We’ve been slowly eating away at it. Good thing cabbages last a long time.

Yes, that’s a 6lb, 13.9 oz cabbage. I guess that makes it almost 7lbs!

-A brisk and invigorating walk.

-Hot tea in a mug.

-A cake on the counter. One day, I was working from home and, in my procrastination, I decided that I had to do something with the sad looking oranges in our fruit bowl. When I say sad, I mean really really sad. Like the outside skins were dyhydrated to the point that the oranges could be used as baseballs. I found this recipe for whole orange bundt cake (Sunset Magazine’s Whole Orange Cake)- you puree the whole orange and put it in the cake. It was the perfect use for the sad oranges. Having the whole orange in the cake gave the cake a marmalade-like tang, making it not too sweet. This lovely cake sat on the counter all week, and how lovely it was to be able to walk over and cut of a slice to nibble whenever I felt like it – morning snack, afternoon tea, dessert… Doesn’t having a cake on the counter just make a kitchen seem like home?

I did not sift the powdered sugar when I made the frosting, so it clumped a little bit.

Looking Forward To:

-Swimming lessons. I managed to snag a hard to get swim lesson slot at one of the county pools. I’ve been feeling a little anxious that the two younger kids still don’t know how to swim, and I’m really hopeful this is the year they learn. I know once a week swim lessons for six weeks probably won’t do it, but it’s a start. I think I’ll also try to find time to take them to the pool as well for rec swim time. We have a new-ish county rec/swim center that opened last year and I hear it’s great. Apparently there are two hydrotherapy pools – one near the kids’ area and one far away from the kids’ area. That sounds like a great design.

-Spring – there have been some positively spring-like days lately. I’m so excited that the weather is beginning to turn.

-Cherry Blossom season! The predictions for Cherry blossom season have started to trickle in. The Washington Post is predicting mid March.

-Knitting. I’m determined to do something with the yarn sitting in my room. I’ve borrowed some books from the library and my friend loaned me some needles and I’ve decided to make a hat. I’ve knitted and pulled apart the first five rows three or four times already, but I guess that’s par for the course. I get a little excited for the possibilities every time I see the yarn and needles.

-Plans with friends. I have three separate dates on the calendar with friends whom I haven’t seen in at least six months, one of them for a year. Looking forward to catching up.

What We Ate:

Monday: Tikil goman Meera Sodha’s recipe for Ethiopian cabbage, carrots, and potatoes. We ate this with the injera that we bought from the Ethiopian grocery store that I mentioned last week. It was really simple and tasty. Vegan.

Tuesday: Taco Tuesday. We had a friend join us for Taco Tuesday last week. The Husband made slow cooker chicken, and I also made black beans and shrimp for the tacos. On the side – mano slaw, guacamole,

Wednesday: Baked Feta and Tomato Pasta – recipe shared by Julie on her blog. This was so easy and tasty. I thought we would have leftovers, but the kids kept asking for more. It was a touch acidic for the Husband, but I think he feels that way about any tomato-heavy dish.

Thursday: I worked this evening so had a work canteen salad. The Husband made this 15 minute Tomato Egg Noodle from Omnivore’s Cookbook. Scrambled eggs cooked in a ginger-y tomato sauce and eaten over noodles. I had leftovers days later and it was SO GOOD.

Friday: Pizza (carry out) and Lego Batman. I’m pretty sure we’ve seen Lego Bathman before, but the Husband said I should just be thankful that he talked the 8 year old out of choosing the latest Paw Patrol movie.

Saturday: The two little kids and I were at a birthday party. There was the usual pizza, but also the family ordered falafel as the main food as well. The falafel was really tasty, the pita pillowy, there were lots of veggies and pickle toppings and there was this amazing spicy green Schug sauce to top it all off. Gold star to the birthday parents for this spread.

Sunday: Dinner out at a really tasty sandwich place, Full On. We were out for the 13 year old’s basketball game, which happened to be close to this bar/restaurant that we really like but don’t go to a lot because it’s not really close to our house. The 13 year old and I shared a Buffalo Chicken Sandwich and a Crab Cake Sandwich with onion rings.

Here’s a thought to leave you with: One of my favorite things to read is the weekly chat of advice columnist Carolyn Hax in the Washington Post. I find that she answers readers questions with such a great blend of empathy and pragmatism and without sugar-coating things. Her readers often contribute similarly thoughtful advice. These past few weeks there has been much angst in reader questions about the state of the world and our place in it. I loved this comment a reader submitted to the chat last Friday:

from the chat on Friday 2/21/2025

Hope you have a week of beautiful points.
Tell me about your mundane body care things. How many bottles are in your shower? Blow dry or not to blow dry? What’s your favorite baked good to have on the counter? What else should I do with my 6 lb cabbage. (I think there’s still 4 lbs left.)

Weekly recap + what we ate: sick week and random FIGS

It was a massively unproductive week. I was laid up sick for much of the week. What started as a throat tickle on Monday, devolved into me in bed for most of Wednesday. Wednesday also happened to be the snow day. Fortunate or unfortunate timing? Well, fortunate in that the kids didn’t have to go to school. Unfortunate in that it was a snow day and everyone really wanted to go sledding… There were disappointed kids for sure. In the end I spent three days in bed with periodic excursions to take the kids to the bus or to activities. Luckily on Friday the Husband took care of the school bus pick up and drop off so I could continue to rest.

I am a terrible sick person. I don’t like to stay in bed, I get bored easily, I always think I feel better way before I actually do. But I will say there is always one point when I feel like being in bed is doing me no good and I have to get outside. By the third day of being in the house resting, I was convinced that I wasn’t going to get any better staying in bed and went for a walk. My body just craved sunshine and fresh air and some movement. I walked towards the 13 year old’s school and met her as shew as on her way home, and he face lit up when she saw me. I don’t know if it’s scientifically backed, but I did feel better for having gotten out of bed and out of the house. Or maybe it was seeing my kid’s face all lit up with cold and joy. I’m reminded of something I read once (maybe it was Oprah) that said, “Make sure your face lights up when you see your child.” Realizing how much it made my day to see my kid’s face light up made me remember that it works both ways and I need to have that same joy when I see her too.

(note: it was Oprah. Rather Toni Morrison via Oprah. Okay -funny story – Toni Morrison taught at my alma mater. I once sat next to her at a lecture, and fell asleep. I hope I didn’t lean on her or drool or anything…)

Anyhow, whatever illness I had is now making it’s way through the house. The Husband had a tickle and I immediately sent him to bed, bought a humidifier, Cold-Eeeze, and Ricola. I’ve been obsessed with the idea that stress is one of the things that can exacerbate illness, so I’ve demanded everyone be as stress-free as possible. No yelling, screaming, or tantrums. Please. He seemed to have escaped the worst of it, though now the 13 year old is laid up in bed. Oh well, the bug will cycle through the family and we’ll all move on. Hunkering and reducing stress seems like an okay way to spend what is shaping up to be a very very cold February.

Fun thing, though – the 13 year old finally had her birthday party sleepover over the weekend. She’s been doing this formula for three years now and I kind of love that. She has friends over on a Saturday night – they watch movies, YouTube videos, eat pizza, chips, rainbow cake, and stay up way too late. Sunday morning we have waffles and bacon and the kids all go see a movie. Even though her birthday was in January, it took us until February to find a good weekend, due to activities and my work schedule. (It seemed downright cruel to make the Husband be the only parent at home during a tween sleepover…) This weekend was perfect because they kids didn’t have Faith Formation classes on Sunday morning and Monday is a day off from school so we can all recuperate.

I’m really proud that the 13 year old did a lot of the planning herself for the first time. Granted the planning wasn’t terribly timely, but she did take on a lot of the mental load, so I’m calling it a win. Being a new phone owner, she sent all the invites herself, as in she texted her friends with the details and tracked who was going to come. I feel like we’re entering new territory where she can make plans with her friends on her own. No more mom-enabled play dates. There was still a little coordination to be done with other parents to coordinate drop offs and pick ups, but all in all, it feels like we are slowly taking baby steps towards the oldest being an independent being. Some days I stop and realize that she will be driving in THREE YEARS and I try not to freak out too much.

The set up – fruit, chips, chips, chips, cookies, and face masks!

Grateful for: I’m trying to be more mindful of big and little gratitudes this month, in honour of Elisabeth’s FIG (Finding Joy in Gratitude) Collective this month. Thank you Elisabeth for gathering people and thoughts! (There’s my first FIG right there!)

-YouTubers who share their expertise – There was a cushion on our basement couch that had lost a button and as a result was going all shapeless. After years of the Husband asking me if it was fixable, I finally decided that the misshapen pillow would not be worthy of our Super Bowl guests so I went to the craft store and bought upholstery needles. I still didn’t have much of an idea of how to fix this, so I turned the experts – YouTube to the rescue. I found a clear and simple tutorial on how to retuft a cushion and in less than twenty minutes, I had fixed the pillow and it was once again standing upright. I felt so accomplished. In the back of my 5 year journal I keep a list of new skills I learn each year. Button tufting is going on the list.

Sad shapeless cushion.
All fixed!

-Early release days for weather and being able to pick up my kid. I know not everyone can accommodate a last minute early release, so I’m really grateful that I’m in a slow period at work and that I could pick up the kid early when the school decided to close at 1pm for weather. We went to Trader Joe’s and even such a simple thing as running an errand, made for some great mommy-daughter time.

-Non-latex dishwashing gloves for my unfortunate combination of latex allergy and eczema.

-Remote start – I will be the first to tell you that I did not want an mini van. I still find it kind of scary to drive – it’s huge and I have no sense of where the rear end is. The thing is like driving around in a living room, seriously. BUT I am discovering many nice features, and this bitterly cold week, the remote start feature was amazing.

-International grocery stores and international communities. I wanted to make tikil goman (Ethopian cabbage, carrots, and potatoes) since we had cabbage and potatoes to use up. Meera Sodha’s recipe had instructions for a faux injera to eat alongside, and I was totally going to make that. But then I realized, “Wait, there is a a sizable Ethiopian population in our county. I should just get the real thing.” So I found an Ethiopian grocery store on the way home from Soccer Clinic and we picked up two packages of pillowy soft injera made fresh on the premises. It was delicious. We might have eaten half a package right out of the bag. How amazing it is to have so many international grocery stores in our area. (Also – I went down a rabbit hole reading Sodha’s column in the Guardian, The New Vegan. I want to make every recipe.)

The injera was still warm!

-The Kids’ Skating instructor. She is amazing and kind and works so well with the kids.

-The track at the 8 year old’s school. I haven’t been running, because of the cold, but there is a track at the elementary school, and one day after drop off I walked four laps while listening to my audiobook. I’m so grateful that these things are open to the public. I remember when I was little, my parents would take us to the high school and make us run laps, and I hated it, but you know… the older I get, the more I see that my parents were really on to something.

-That the car is okay. I went over a curb funny and suddenly there was this horrible scraping noise when I drove. I pulled over seriously panicking that I had done some serious damage and wondering when I was going to have time to take the car in. After looking under the hood and around the tires, and not finding anything I got down on my hands and knees and reached under the car to see if I could feel anything. Like a detached muffler. (Not even sure if that’s a thing or if I was looking in the right area for such a thing.). Then my hand felt a twig and I gave a large tug and out came a four foot long branch. Oh thank goodness. Problem solved.

-Carpooling to work with my friend and picking up Starbucks (her) and cheesy buns (me) on the way home. Letting her convince me to buy a jelly donut, which I immediately eat in three bites, covering myself with powdered sugar in the process. I don’t regret it at all.

Also this bumper sticker we saw on the way:

There was quite an eclectic collection of bumper stickers on this truck.

And Some Sick Week FIGS:
-Windows. Three days sick in bed can make one tired of staring at the the walls of one’s bedroom. Except there are windows in those walls. And through those windows I could still see sunlight and clouds and sunsets and beautiful skies.

-Mucinex – I don’t usually take drugs when I’m sick, but boy did I need it this time; I was so congested I couldn’t breath or sleep.

-Kleenex.

-Rice cakes, ramen, and soup. Making lunch seemed like an impossible task when i was sick, but I also don’t like being hungry, so I did manage to make some simple soups. One day it was ramen with a cabbage, and an egg mixed in. Another day, it was a riff of this (Rice Cake Soup with Bok Coy and Edamame), though instead of chicken broth I made a “broth” by using water with kimchi tossed in. And I added dandelion greens and ginger because that’s what I had. The hot spicy filling goodness what just what I needed.

-Audiobooks – I mentioned above that I’m a terrible sick person because I get bored easily in bed. I did watch Bridget Jones’s Baby, but too much tv made my head hurt. Audiobooks to the rescue. I checked out a few rom coms from the library and listened to them. I only half paid attention to them, but the soothing voices and just enough plot was enough to calm my brain.

-The thirteen year old – who took care of the kids on the snow days when I was sick. I’m pretty sure she made them lunch and hot chocolate and let them watch inane YouTube videos all day. I know she did make them go outside for a little bit and play in the snow. But the important thing is she kept them out of the bedroom where I was sleeping.

-The Husband – who made dinner and put the kids to bed and basically solo parented while I was in bed.

-That I’m healing. The second day of being sick, I thought some yoga might heal my congestion, so I went on YouTube and searched “Yoga when sick” and a 15 minute gentle yoga video came up. It was just the easy practice that I needed to stretch a little and breathe. At the end of the video, Sara Beth said something that really stuck with me:
“Instead of telling yourself ‘I’m sick, I’m stuffy, I’m exhausted, I’m miserable’, tell yourself ‘I’m healing.’”
What a wonderful, gratitude-filled way to frame being sick. Rather than focus on how awful I’m feeling, reminding myself that the fever and mucus are all signs that my body is well enough to fight whatever it is that has me down, and that I’m healing.

Looking Forward To – so ironically two of my “Looking forward to” things from last week did not happen because I was sick – I didn’t go contra dancing and we didn’t enjoy a cozy snow day – but I think there is still great value in giving ourselves things to look forward to:

-Getting back into a routine after being sick.

-Voice recital that I’m doing supertitles for this week. There’s some really great music on the program and I always have a really long dinner break when I do this gig, so I’m looking forward to a nice evening walk.

-Finishing this book on audio. This was one of the books I started when I was sick and it’s pretty cute – a bit gimmicky, but not annoyingly so. (I also started another book that wasn’t as interesting, but perfectly soothing in the moment. I probably wont’ finish that one.)

What We Ate:
Monday: Cheesesteak sandwiches, leftover from the Super Bowl

Tuesday: Taco Tuesday. It’s getting to be a tradition. Chicken, shrimp, black beans, mango cabbage slaw, guacamole, salsa, pickled onions.

Wednesday: Sheet pan gnocchi with broccoli and cherry tomatoes. Vegan. (I think, though come to think of it, I’m not sure if we bought vegan gnocchi.)

Thursday: Noodles w/ tofu and mushrooms. The Husband made this. I couldn’t get out of bed to eat it that night, but I had leftovers on Saturday night and they were so delicious.

Friday: Pizza (Take out) and Skeleton Crew – the latest (I think) series in the Star Wars Franchise. This one stars a bunch of kids who seem to be very far from home. And Jude Law.

Saturday: The 13 year old’s sleepover. There was a lot of pizza (from Dominos), and chips. And Rainbow cake. We get this cake every year from our local deli/diner, which in turn get them from David’s Cookies. I ate leftovers from the fridge.

Sunday: Fend for yourself. I’m pretty sure the kids ate leftover movie popcorn and injera for dinner.

Hope you have a healthy week!

What are your go to comforts and cures when you’re sick? Who makes your face light up? Whose face do you make light up?

Weekly recap + what we ate: Snack conundrum, February aspirations, and listening to

This week – work, family, federal chaos. I don’t know if I have the bandwidth to unpack all of that. Or even if I should/want to/etc.

So here are some less consequential things on my mind lately….

The snack situation at our house is pissing me off. It seems like the kids are constantly snacking. Okay, I’m going to be honest – what pisses me off the most is that they are taking my snacks. Specifically my peanut M&Ms. One of my snacks of choice to pack for work is a trail mix of pretzels, peanut M&Ms, and dried cherries. I bought a big bag of M&Ms to do this. (Rather, the Husband bought me a bag when he was at the grocery store.) The kids found it and the bag was nearly gone within the week. Ooooh the rage I felt. Anyhow – my options as I see it are:
1)stop buying Peanut M&Ms. This would make me sad.
2) Hide the peanut M&Ms better. But where? The kids are very persistent.
3) Give them better alternatives. Would this work? Would they eat the bowl of carrots I put out for them? Really they just want M&Ms.
4) have a no snacking rule. HAHAHAHAHA. Nope.
5) get over myself and let them eat the peanut M&Ms.

I realize this is completely irrational. Peanut M&Ms aren’t like beer – it’s not something I can pass off as a “Mommy snack.” I’m trying to think of why my kids can’t have Peanut M&Ms whenever they want in a way that doesn’t make me feel petty. (ie. they can’t have peanut M&Ms because the M&M are MINE!!!!!) Sigh. It’s really hard to be the bigger person in this parenting thing.

So anyhow I’m trying to think of better snacks.

Listening to lately – Despite my musing in my 2024 media diet post about my lack of music listening, I’ve been trying to rectify it somewhat. Some things I’m listening to:
–All Songs Considered. I am so not hip, but I like this podcast because they play music I’ve never heard of (honestly that’s not that difficult. My musical rolodex is quite limited) by artists I’ve never heard of (but probably should know about), and they tell you why they like the pieces.

-Our Tainan playlist. On the bus in Taiwan, I made a playlist by asking everyone in the family (my parents, my brother’s family’ the Husband and kids) to choose one song to add to the list. It’s a little all over the place, but I love listening it because it reminds me of my family:

-Okay you know what is unassumingly charming music? The soundtrack to Bluey. There is even a poppy version of Pachelbel’s Canon that doesn’t drive me batty. I’ve been playing this album when I want something cheerful in the background. The music embodies the happiness I want my kids to remember when they are grown,.


(Note – Pachelbel’s Canon is one of those pieces of music that makes me roll my eyes. Funny story – It was the one piece of music that I was adament would not be played at my wedding. The organist suggested it and was shut down rather quickly. But then, my parents arranged a wedding banquet in Taiwan for all their relatives. And what did the DJ play when the Husband and I entered? Pachelbel’s Canon. What could the Husband and I do but laugh?)

Some light aspirations for February:

-Register the 5 year old for kindergarten. This is one of two big “To Do” of February. She is for sure going to Kindergarten this fall. No one is stopping her.

– Start organizing forms for our tax person. This is the other big “To Do” for us. I start back at rehearsal at the end of March, so I need this done before then. Also our tax guy wants tax documents submitted two weeks before

-Schedule an appointment for window treatments. Now that I’ve donated the 20 year old car, this is the looming-perpetually-put-off item at the top of my to do list.

-Schedule an eye appointment. The situation is sad, friends. I haven’t had my eyes checked in four or five years and things just don’t look crisp anymore. I really need to fix this before I have to spend more time standing in the dark backstage trying to read music by the light of a tiny book light.

-Paint and send some cards.

-Work – clean out the office, organize the laptop situation, order spike tape. I have two supertitle gigs, so I want to make sure I get ahead of that work and not leave it to the last minute.

-home – 30 day declutter challenge. I found a Thirty Day Declutter Challenge online. I like that it’s in ten minute increments.

-write Taiwan/Kuala Lumpur trip recaps.

-Schedule time to see friends.

-Family game night.

-Make it to one of the 13 year old’s middle school basketball games.

-Valentine’s Day. Help the kids write their cards.

-Routine and Habit goals:
* yoga daily
* journal/ track habits daily
*1 vegan dinner a week. Trying to eat more vegetables.
*Go to bed before midnight.
*Read every day.

Grateful For – It’s been so uplifting to read read everyone’s FIGs via Elisabeth’s gratitude challenge. Here are some of my FIGS for the past week:
– The Husband showing me a beautiful sunset. He was on his way out the door to pick up one of the kids and he came back, saying, “Look at this sunset!” It was stunning, all orange-y pink incandescence.

-Hoodies with zippered pockets. Good for when I just stuff my keys in my pocket.

-Our gas grill and the tenant who left it for us. I was a charcoal grill person for the longest time, but then our tenant left behind a gas grill when she moved out. It’s not the same flavor, but it sure as hell is faster.

-Wifi at kids’ activities. Lets me get work done. Or blogging. Like right now at the Agility Center.

-Fresh baked muffins. And a batter that is sturdy enough to sit in the fridge for a few days so that I can make more on a whim.

-A commute home when I hit all the green lights. Makes me feel unstoppable.

-Parks and playgrounds nearby. I feel so lucky that we live somewhere that there’s usually a park or playground within a 10-15 minute radius of wherever we are, so if we have some awkward time to kill between activities, we can find a playground.

-Movie night and cuddles from the kids on the couch.

-The cherry tree in the living room isn’t dead after all. The Husband on a whim bought a cherry tree last year. It’s been living in our living room and for a while it was just sad and bare. But slowly, so slowly that I hadn’t even noticed, there has been green emerging from the brown branches. And this week, there was even a blossom.

Looking Forward To:
– Contra Dancing! There is a Thursday night contra dance this week near us. Looking forward to going with the family.

-Vanilla. So we ran out of vanilla this week. Or rather we ran out of vanilla at some point before this week and no one clocked it to put it on the grocery list before I wanted to make a big batch of muffins. I had some vanilla beans that my mother in law had bought me for Christmas one year. (Note, my mother in law passed away in 2016, so these have been in the pantry for a looooong time.) I’d been too intimidated to use the vanilla bean, but desparate times….

I scraped a vanilla pod into the muffins. then I read that you could make your own vanilla extract by sticking a vanilla pod in vodka and leaving it for six months. Well…. Last show, a singer had given me a tiny bottle of vodka for opening night. Alcohol is a common opening night present, but I don’t drink, so it’s often a conundrum of what to do with it. Well, this was perfect. I stuck a vanilla bean in that tiny bottle of vodka. And now I wait. For six months. I’m so excited. I also hope I remember it’s there in August.

Open in six months. I guess I have to remember where I put it in six months.

-Another snow day. Looking forward to hunkering, maybe baking. I have some meetings that I’ll take from home. Shhhhh… don’t tell the kids, but there might be movie marathon at some point so I can read. See next point.

-Reading this book:

This book was all the rage last year. It finally came off my holds as a seven day loan, so I’m madly trying to read it this week because if I don’t finish it, the waitlist for this book is like 2000 people long. It’s proving funny and sharp. Also makes me wonder if my wardrobe is boring and normal.

What We Ate:
Monday: Greek Salad and Zucchini Fritters. Vegan. (I used a flax egg for the fitters.)

Tuesday: Taco Tuesday. We had a friend over this time. I made grilled chicken, black beans, shrimp, mango-cabbage slaw. We had also pickled onions, guac, sour cream, avocados. Corn tortillas and wheat tortillas.

Wednesday: Random dinner – I used up the rest of the sunchokes by making another batch of sunchoke chips, and also steamed green beans. The Husband was out running and errand and came home with kung pao chicken and garlic pork.

Thursday: Waffles and tofu scramble (The Husband Cooked). This was our attempt at breakfast for dinner in an age of $10 eggs.

Friday: Pizza (The Husband made it) and Avengers: Civil War. A very unsatisfying movie.

Saturday: DogFish Head Brewery for the Husband’s birthday

Super Bowl Sunday: We had several friends over and there was so. much. food: we made cheeseteaks, dumplings, and snickerdoodles. Our friends brought: smoked turkey, chicken wings, white bean buffalo dip, brownies. There was also a lot of chips, Doritos (Cool Ranch and Regular), and cucumbers and carrots. Also, these Pringles:

I am pretty notorious in my circles for eating anything, but these were… not good. They were meaty with a green pepper aftertaste that tasted both surprisingly accurate and completely artificial.

Hope you have a lovely week!

What are you currently snacking on? What’s one song you would add to my playlist? Any big to do list items for February?