Even though it was a long weekend. I still had to work on Saturday and Monday I had a shop call for our union. So it didn’t feel like a long weekend. But it was the first Sunday in ages when no one had any activities, so I declared I wanted to go on a hike. I haven’t been on a proper hike in such a long time – I don’t think I’ve been on one yet this year. We wanted to just go for half a day, so I picked a new to us location that was about 45 minutes away – Gambrill State Park. I thought it was a perfectly pleasant hike – the weather was nice and cool, and the hike had some pretty steep parts to keep it interesting. (The Husband at one point said, “I have one work for you – switchbacks. Clearly this hiking path was made by young men with good knees.”). There was a nice little view of the city below at the end. I think it was a 3 mile loop which we did in about 2.5 hours.
At the parking lot, there was a little nature/history center. It had a couple small exhibits on the wildlife in the area and then also a room dedicated to the Civilian Conservation Corps which built the park as part of the New Deal. I was super fascinated by this menu that was on display.
I have so many thoughts: First of all – the three meals are Breakfast, Dinner, and Supper. Where’s lunch? I’m guessing Dinner is the midday meal? (I’ve never really used the term “supper”.) Though it looks like dinner is the large meal on the weekends. On the weekdays, it’s sandwiches. Secondly – it’s a lot of meat. The vegetable pickings are… slim – buttered beets? And the only fruit I see are oranges, stewed apricots, and prunes. Thirdly – I’m glad they got ice cream. Fourthly – what’s a “cheese salad” sandwich?
Speaking of food – this whole trip I had been promising the kids that we could have ice cream if they came on the hike – yes, my kids need to be bribed to go hiking with their parents. The 13 year old said, “I don’t want ice cream. I want boba.” To which I said, “I don’t think there will be boba where we are going.”
Well, lo and behold, when we got to the vista point, there were two young men hanging out with boba drinks. I gave the 13 year old a nudge and she went up to them and said, “Excuse me, where did you get your boba?”
Well, I was wrong – there was a boba place about 15-20 minutes from the park.
After the hike, we went to late lunch at a nearby diner, where the portions were huge and delicious and then we went to get boba. The Boba place was in the back of a family owned Filipino grocery store.
The boba place was in the same plaza as a furniture store. The Husband and I have a weakness for furniture stores. There’s something really fun about going and looking at furniture for us – I don’t know what it is – we like sitting in chairs, opening and closing drawers, looking at side tables. I think furniture is fun and full of possibilities. A lot of furniture in furniture stores, though, we find is too big for our space so we don’t often buy anything. At any rate, there was a Memorial Day sale going on and we ended up buying two chairs. One for the Husband to sit and read in the sun room and one swivel chair that’s big enough for two people that is going to be super cozy for reading together. Not sure if that will go in the kids’ bedroom or in the living room yet. I also found this super cute swivel chair that I was really tempted to get for the 13 year old’s room, except it’s white and a white chair in a teenager’s room seems… unwise.
Anyhow, that was our big Memorial Day adventure. On Monday I took the little kids to the park while the Husband gardened. Then I had a meeting for union stuff, and then I headed over to a friends’ house to eat lots of meat. Out friend had a smoker and he made pulled pork, brisket, and ribs. It was all delicious.
Evenings: I’ve been pondering evenings. It’s another quirk of “reentry” after closing a show that suddenly I get my evenings back. Now that I’m not at the theatre every night, a whole new time slot has opened up in my life. There was one day last week, when the kids were home from school by 4:30pm, and I didn’t have to start dinner until 5:00pm, and I sat in the living room and read while the kids did… I’m not sure, but it didn’t involve me. And it felt horribly indulgent. But then I thought, “What if this is just what life is like?” I’m sure there was something on my to do list that I could have done – my desk, for example, needs a going through, there are bills to be paid (and a traffic ticket) – but none of that felt urgent. The time between coming home from the bus and then starting dinner – surely it isn’t a time of leisure, is it? It feels like there should be million things to do upon returning to the house in the evening.
Another night last week, the Husband took the 8 year old to soccer practice and I was home with the other two kids. “What shall we do?” I asked. And how silly it felt to be asking, “What shall we do?” at 7pm in the evening. Shouldn’t we be at the point in the evening where we stop doing things? Anyhow, the 5 year old’s response was, “Can we bake something?” So I made a lemon buttermilk cake. It was delicious. Here are some other things we have done with our evenings, post dinner clean up:
-played card games. (Currently I love playing Skyjo – it’s a numbers game, which is nice because it doesn’t require deftness with the English language or being able to read, meaning that both my father and the 5 year old can play.)
-Watched New Girl with the 13 year old and howled with laughter.
-Read a book while listening to the kids practice piano.
-Read a book while the kids played together. One night, the 13 year old decided she wanted to stage “Dear Theodosia” from Hamilton with her little siblings. It involved stuffed animals and chairs put together to make a crib.
-Walk around the block.
It used to be the late afternoons/evenings were a slow crawl towards bedtime, but it doesn’t feel like that anymore. The kids are old enough that they don’t require constant vigilance. They usually even help clean up. There are kid activities, and even then, with both parents at home, we can take turns driving. And we don’t need to participate in the activities; we can just drop off. And then go run errands or read or take a walk or write. I hate to say it, but kids activities have sometimes been lovely pockets of alone time for me.
The other thing for me is that 7:00pm is a little bit of a mind shift. When I’m at work, 7pm is the start of the last rehearsal of the day. At 7pm, there are three and a half more hours of work in front of me before I can clock out. 7pm is the most hectic time off the day at work because we have chorus and dancers and principals and supers showing up for rehearsal all at once and it’s a mad frenzy to check all the sign in sheets and make sure were are ready to start rehearsal. But when I’m not working, 7pm feels like the end of the day – the dishes are all done (hopefully), the floors are swept, and there is just one little sliver of time left before the kids can go to bed. Before the kids need to go to bed and we can, as the Husband says, Turn off the taxi cab light. 7pm is wind down time. Okay, baking a cake is not a wind down activity, but there is a certain soothing rhythm to baking that lends itself to a gentle close to the day. And, truth, some nights it takes up upwards of 90 minutes to clean up after dinner, so clearly a leisurely evening is not always the case. This is probably for another post, but I don’t understand how some nights post dinner clean up is 20 minutes and sometimes it just seems to take. so. long.
Which, having said all that, we are about to go into eight weeks of summer swim season, so the evenings will decidedly not be leisurely as there will be practices four nights a week as well as a weekly meet. But I guess that’s it – maybe we are in a season – and I work in an industry – where the routines and rhythms are constantly shifting? So I have to work at being intentional – or intentionally unintentional – about those evening hours. I could putter around the house endlessly, but I could also read a book. I could sit down and pay the bills, or I could scroll. All activities add value to my life, fills buckets – yes, even scrolling in moderation. I think what doesn’t fill my buckets is feeling like I am defaulting to being unintentional with my energy. Maybe I need a list of activities that could be done in 15, 30, 60 minute increments? A couple things I do want to do more is consistent journaling, painting, organize something (bins, papers, files, craft supplies…)
I’ll leave you with this bit of sartorial serendipity….
When you and your kid inadvendently dress all matchy-matchy:
Grateful For:
-The parent in the 5 year old’s class who had the class over to try vegetables from their garden. What a sweet little field trip. Also, the 5 year old ate kale. This is the kid who picks any speck of green out of her food. And then a few days later, she ate salad. On her own. Like filled a bowl with vegetables and lettuce and ate it.
-Our friend for giving us his CSA while he’s on vacation. We ate the salad greens and the fennel. (The fennel I used in a fruit salad). We still have chard and mustard greens left, though…
-our piano and people who play it, filling the house with music.
-summer evenings warm enough and light enough for a post dinner constitutional.
-having the ingredients on hand to impulsively make a cake. And then having the cake on the counter to snack on all week.
-That one of my bus stop friends whom I no longer get to see anymore because of return to office requirements got off work two hours early and came to the bus stop and I got to see her and chat.
-getting a run in between activities and sudden rain showers.
-It’s mulberry season! There are several mulberry bushes along the paths/trails where I walk and it’s a true joy of summer – picking mulberries off the bushes and eating them – a sweet/tart treat.
-Dogs at the dentist. My dentist has an office dog – a cute chill little beagle that greets patients as they come in. It just brightens my day when I go for my cleaning to see her bright eyes and wagging tail.
-Siblings not fighting:
-Being able to get a same day doctor’s appointment. The 5 year old’s eye was strangely swollen one day, so she couldn’t go to school. But I was able to call the pediatrician and get an appointment for later that day. They couldn’t tell for certain what it was, but put her on antibiotics just in case.
-Getting a bonus afternoon with the 5 year old because she couldn’t go to school. See above. After the doctor’s I took her to the park and we had a lovely afternoon in the sunshine.
Looking Forward To:
-Piano recitals for the 8 year old and the 13 year old. (This has since happened…)
-First Communion for the 8 year old. This falls under the “I’m not Catholic, but I like rituals and gatherings.”
-Voice recital for the 13 year old. Maycember keeps coming.
-going to the opera with the Husband and the 13 year old.
-Seeing this movie:
I don’t go to the movies a lot – it just always seems very expensive to me in terms of time and money. But this movie looks like exactly my catnip, so a friend and I are going to see a weekday matinee.
-Also – You’ve Got Mail is currently on Amazon Prime. It’s been on my “Movies I’ve never seen but really want to watch” list forever. So that’s going to happen too. I actually put it on one night as I was doing the dishes, but it was so adorable that I turned it off and decided I wanted to save it for when I could snuggle on the couch and watch it.
What We Ate:
Monday: Sandwiches and cut up vegetables. Simple supper for an activity filled Monday night.
Tuesday: Taco Tuesday. Chicken mole tacos – this was the mole sauce that I made a huge batch of last month and then froze. It actually tasted better this second time around. I still have one more jar of sauce in the freezer. yum.
Wednesday: Greek Pasta Salad. Vegan. I was looking for a vegan pasta salad and came across this recipe for tofu feta – it’s basically tofu marinated to give it the flavor profile of feta. I thought it was delicious. The family really liked it. The Husband said that once you get over the fact that the “feta” is not, in fact, cheese, it’s really tasty.
Thursday: Breakfast Sandwiches
Friday: Pizza (the Husband made pizza) and The Eternals. It was the 13 year old’s turn to choose the movie and she picked this Marvel movie – the movie was fine, but it was 2.5 hour long, which was longer than I wanted to spend watching flashing flight scenes and bizarre hard to follow plots. But I do think Gemma Chan is divine.
Saturday: My dad took us out to dinner at a nearby Chinese restaurant where we ordered waaaaay too much food, all of it delicious.
Sunday: we didn’t really have dinner because we had a late lunch at a diner with hugmongous portions so no one was hungry come dinner time
Monday: We went over to a friend’s house for Memorial Day cookout. Our friend loves to smoke meat and he had brisket, ribs, and pulled pork. Also mac n cheese, baked beans, and two kinds of pie. We brought fruit salad and an green salad.
Hope you have a lovely weekend!
How long does it take for you to clean up after dinner? On that note – do you call it dinner or supper? Anyone have ideas of what to do with mustard greens? Any movies that you’ve always wanted to see but never have? What would you do with 15 minutes of free time? 20? 30?
It used to be super common to refer to the noon meal as dinner, my grandmas used to do that all the time. I think it comes from the farming community, in which a substantial meal at noon was required to keep going with all the physical activity. I know, it seems weird to us now to think of such a heavy meal at noon, but I clearly remember this being the case with my grandparents. Also, holy crap, that menu is my actual nightmare.
I LOVE your Snoopy sweatshirt!
I am a person who likes to chill in the evenings, and I can’t remember actually doing anything with my kids in the evening. I guess it’s because I didn’t have a job and so I was with them all day.
Yup. My parents will call it dinner (for lunch) and then supper for the evening meal. And their “dinner” is always what they call their “main meal” which would be meat, veggies, and some starch!
I have felt like a glorified cab driver lately. I actually LIKE shuttling kids around, but I am struggling with how late things run now that they’re older. I really feel grumpy about having to leave the house after we’ve eaten supper (dinner), but everything they have starts well after that.
Hooray for salads. Yum. I’ve been enjoying them. My kids tolerate salads but definitely don’t enjoy them like I do!
I have a friend who calls the evening meal supper, but I don’t know anyone else who does. And she still calls the midday meal lunch. When I’m on vacation I kind of like to have my main meal in the middle of the day and a lighter meal in the evening, but we don’t manage that most of the time. As your kids get older, the shuttling them around gets later and later and it sucks because you just want to go to bed already, and they won’t finish with whatever for another hour or two…it’s a lot better when they can drive.
The view from your hike is beautiful, and that Jane Austen movie looks like it could be fun. We went to a movie for the first time in a while today, and it was fun, maybe we should do that more often.