Child-free weekend – what makes good “me” time?

The Husband and the kids left on Friday and came back Monday night. Since I was working Monday night, that meant four whole days child free for me. Wow. I don’t think I’ve had that much child-free time since the days when I used to travel for work. Anyhow, it was a really relaxing and quiet four days. I slept late, had breakfast out on the back patio, wore my pajamas all day practically, spent too much time scrolling idly… I did work all day Friday, had Saturday off, then worked Sunday evening and Monday afternoon and evening/night. And in between – I think I did pretty well on my aspirations:

– Wash my bras. Done! and they fit much better now. But I still do need new bras… I should look into if the company that makes these favorite nursing bras also make a non-nursing option.
– Pick up the house. Done! Mostly. and, it was infinitely less stressful for me to do it by myself than to monitor while my kids did it. I just put on a podcast or streamed some This is Us and tidied. It almost felt like enjoyable puttering rather than manic cleaning because it felt so relaxed.
– a yoga or a gentle strength workout video. Yes. Thank you Fitness Blender!
– ten year old’s Halloween costume. Perpetual October task. Still not done. This need serious attention. Halloween is in less than a week!!!!
–put oil in my car. Done! This took all of five minutes, but I hate doing it while the car is still warm from driving, and I never remember to do it until I’m actually driving my car. One of those super simple things that needs to be put on a to do list in order to get done.
-sleepover with my friend. Yes! Such a wonderful cozy time. more on that below.
-Hike and picnic with sleepover friend. Yes!
–Work Sunday Night. Yes! Couldn’t very well not show up for that one. Our first rehearsal onstage with orchestra… Man oh man, this current show is LOUD. It’s German so lots of loud brassy music and loud consonant filled singing. But the sheer wall of sound is amazing. Sometimes I love my job. Getting blasted by an orchestra of sound is one of those times.
–random internet chores – bills, activity sign ups, still on the quest for black shoes ish. Activity sign up. Still no shoes. Need to remember to pay the bills this week. Apparently I forgot to pay the gas bill last month. Ugh.

My friend from college came over Saturday night and we went to see the movie Tar. (There’s an accent in there somewhere, but I haven’t figured out how to do that…). It’s about a conductor (Female. Interesting that I feel the need to mention that, but it is kind of an important take) whose career starts to unravel because of hubris and allegations of sexual harassment (those things are definitely related). The trailer is seriously misleading and makes the movie seem like some kind of horror/thriller movie. As we sat down, my friend, who is a huge classical music nerd, said to me, “I hope this movie isn’t like the trailer.” It wasn’t. The film was more of a provocative character study about the idea of power dynamics and the person we present to the world. It’s a little grim and dark, but there were funny moments and definitely a lot of juicy classical music world details

There is one moment early on when Blanchett’s character talks about how a conductor is someone who controls time – they start the music, they stop the music, then they re-start it. It’s a powerful thought. But then a voice inside me said, “Yes, but even the conductor music acquiesce to the stage manager when time runs out and the rehearsal is over…” So there’s that.

Anyhow – a good film. Dark in places. Darkly funny in others. Great performances. And how awesome to see the backstage of the classical music world.

The next day my friend and I went hiking at Great Falls, on a trail that is called Billy Goat Trail. Specifically it’s Billy Goat Trail A. There is also B and C, and A is the most challenging. I had contemplated bringing the kids on this trail, but I had heard that it wasn’t recommended for really little kids, so I wanted to check it out myself. It was indeed a little difficult in places – the terrain is really rocky and follows along the Potomac river, and while I have no doubt the kids could handle it, some of the rocky terrain was really close the the edge of a drop off down to the River and I would be afraid of someone falling. I’m thinking I might wait until next spring to tackle it with the kids.

It was a gorgeous hike, and there was lots of fall colour to be seen:

We packed lunches which we ate perched high above the Potomac River. There’s something so nice about eating outside. I brought soy eggs (boiled eggs marinated in soy sauce and tea), hummus, guacamole, veggies, apple slices, and string cheese:

This was the toughest part of the climb – a fairly vertical stretch of cliff wall:

Also loved seeing this heart in nature:

The hike took about two hours, though we went slow and stopped frequently to savor the views and have a snack. It also isn’t a very shady hike, so I think it’s best suited for fall or spring. I’m glad I went – it’s probably the area’s most famous hike, and I had never been. I feel so lucky that this National Park is less than thirty minutes away from me!

More beautiful fall nature pictures of the views along the way:

And my friend took this picture of me along one of the cliff edges. I often shy away from having pictures taken of myself, but I think it’s nice to have pictures once in a while to acknowledge where I’ve been and my very existence.

So a good combination of fun/personal/life admin tasks – which I think is important for me to feel like I’m using my “me” time well. If I had done all fun things, I would have felt the household tasks looming and then felt guilty and anxious for not getting it done. (I do feel a little anxious about the Hallowe’en costume, but I know it will get done.) And conversely, if I had only done the house tasks, I would have felt like I didn’t get to fill up my personal soul bucket. Also – getting to sleep in without anyone crawling into bed with me and demanding “Milk!!!!!” was glorious. I don’t love being in the house by myself, but I do resent when kids are constantly in my space. It’s a fine line.