favorite things – Life Off Headset

2024 Media Favorites

I try to track the media I consume – I like being able to look back on what went into my brain, and remember if I enjoyed it or not. I don’t have a very cohesive method of tracking, just random scribbles in my journal. I do make longer entries for live performances, though. Here are some things that I consumed that really stood out in 2024. I don’t know if these are my absolute favorites – I find I didn’t take really good notes last year, but these were things that stayed with me (I know these lists are usually posted in January or December even, but.. here you go…)

BOOKS
I read 59 books this year, mostly fiction. I think I’ve re-discovered that I like reading paper copies of books over ebooks. Certainly over reading books on my phone. I get distracted too easily when I read books on my phone.

I DNF books a lot. Not because I don’t like them, but because something more interesting comes along and other things fall to the wayside. I tend to “hate-read” books that I don’t like because I really want to see what happens. I should maybe let that go.

Favorite Reads 2024 :
Ministry of Time by Kalaine Bradley – Time travel isn’t usually my thing. But apparently if you mix time travel with a very attractive Victorian explorer, workplace politics, and political thriller and wrap that in a story that asks questions about what really is “progress”, I guess that ends up being my jam.

Landslide by Susan Conley – I loved this book set in Maine, about a mother of two teenage boys in trying to cope when her husband is injured in a fishing accident off the coast of Nova Scotia. It’s the kind of book that quietly pierces to the core of the beauty and heartbreak of every day life.

Green Island by Shawna Yang Ryan – This book – about Taiwan under martial law, about being an immigrant in America, about how a family deals with trauma and hardship – this book felt very deeply personal to me. These were the times that my parents lived in.

The Adventures of Amina el-Sarifi – Middle aged female pirate gathering a team together to carry out one last heist while battling magical creatures. There is a lot of that description that isn’t my usual jam, but 40 year old bad ass heroines certainly are.

Untangled: Guiding Teenage Girls Through the Seven Transitions to Adulthood by Lisa Damour – Forget that cringey title, this books was super insightful for me in thinking about how to relate to my tween.

Audiobooks:
The Monsters We Defy by Lesley Penelope read by Shyana Small – I loved this audiobook so much that I borrowed the e-book from the library to read it again. I’m not one into fantasy, but the historical aspects set in 1920s DC provided a good gateway for me to sink into this story.

Ten Things That Never Happened by Alexis Hal, read by Will Watt – I really enjoy Alexis Hall’s books for their mix of humor and quirky yet human characters. Will Watt’s narration of this book upped that all for me. This cozy rom com of a book was like my favorite Richard Curtis movie in audiobook form.

PODCASTS:
I’d say next to books podcasts are the media I consume most. I tend to like podcasts that are long conversations about the human condition, or deep dives into something super niche. I do also listen to a lot of parenting podcasts.

House Calls with Vivek Murthy – I am so sad that Murthy, who was Surgeon General under Obama and Biden, will no longer be producing this podcast, what with him losing his job and all. When I think of podcasts that dissect the essence of what makes us human and how we connect to each other, this podcast is right there. I loved his interview with astronaut Kayla Barron – it’s probably my single most favorite podcast episode this year. In addition to the fascinating details on how one becomes and astronaut, Barron has so many wise words to say about life on earth. I had previously mentioned that she frames the ordinary with the extraordinary. (Fixing the treadmil… in space!) She also said something that has stuck with me about building diverse teams, and that is it’s not about diversity for the sake of diversity, it’s about bringing diversity of thought to a project. That’s so important to remember in the current anti-DEI times. Murthy’s interview with poet Ada Limon is also fantastic – it gave me a lot to think about how I spend my days. You’re going to have to find this podcast on your player because it is no longer available on the Health and Human Services website. wump wump.

Sold a Story: This series actually came out in 2022, though I found it still really relevant. It’s an investigative journalism series that looks at how children are being taught to read in America, specifically how a method that had no scientific backing was being used throughout schools.

Nice White Parents: A 5 episode podcast from 2020 that looks at how parents can shape public schools, and not necessarily for the benefit of everyone.

This is So Awkward – Cara Natterson and Vanessa Kroll Bennett are the experts I turn to when I feel like I’m failing at parenting a tween (now teenager). They provide the perfect blend of science and compassion for navigating this stage of parenting.

28-ish Days Later – podcast from the BBC that looks at the menstural cycle from both a biological and historical perspective. I especially appreciated the sentiment that our periods don’t make women weaker – after all what is stronger than being able to deal with having a different body every single day as we cycle though physical and emotional states?

MOVIES: I think I went to see two, maybe three, movies in the theatre last year. We watch movies at home, but mostly for family movie night. I find I don’t have a lot of bandwidth for watching movies on my own. As a result, most of our movie watching is not at all current.

Babes – My friend and I went to a midweek matinee of this movie last spring, when things were kind of slow at work. We laughed so so so hard at this movie. It stars Ilana Glazer and Michelle Buteau in a story about two best friends whose relationship is tested when the perpetually single one accidentally becomes pregnant. There are pregnancy jokes, pumping jokes, parenting jokes, BFF jokes… All of which fell in the “funny because it’s true” category. Was the movie stunningly original? Probably not, but that doesn’t make it any less wonderful. Why haven’t more people seen this movie????

Family Movie Night: Pizza and movie night is a staple at our place. Usually on a Friday night or a Saturday night. Some of our (MY) favorites this year that we watched with the kids (who were 12, 7, and 4):
-Night at the Museum – action and excitement
-Next Goal Wins – heartwarming soccer movie. Also Michael Fassbender is dreamy.
-Greatest Showman – we watch this at least twice a year, singing along loudly
-Barbie – subversive bubble gum fun, that had me in tears at the end.
-Mitchells vs. the Machines – Animated movies aren’t my default pick for movie night – I’m trying to watch more live action things. But this movie was delightful and heart-warming.

TELEVISION
Family TV Night: This year we really leaned into family TV night rather than family movie night. What with everyone’s activities, a 30 or 60 minute episode of something was just the right length to fit in between basketball practice and bedtime. Favorite shows we watched:
-Gallivant. WHY WHY WHY was there only two seasons of this family friendly, funny, entertaining show?
-Glee. Some of the subject matter was awkward to explain, but the musical numbers had us all bobbing along.
-Bad Batch, The Acolyte, and really anything in the Star Wars Universe. When we don’t know what to watch, Star Wars
-Star Trek: The Next Generation. When we were vacationing on an Island in Maine, we watched ST:TNG non stop for three days. It didn’t feel as dated as I thought it would.
-The Summer Olympics. So exciting to watch.
-Bluey. I don’t know why it took us this long to get into Bluey. The episodes are short and feel so true to life, perfect way to unwind before bedtime. (Like the one where the kids drop their ice cream cone and declare to dad, “It’s not fair!” and Dad says, “That’s about as fair as it gets, actually.” Made me howl with laughter.)
-Brooklyn 99 and Modern Family. When we just want to spend 22 minutes laughing.

Grown Up Show for Me: I don’t watch a whole lot of TV – mostly because I often would rather read a book at night to wind down. But I do like watching TV as I clean the kitchen, and occasionally I’ll watch something with the Husband. I for sure don’t watch all the shows that are hip or trendy or buzzy. To be honest, I feel like a lot of the stuff that everyone is watching is too violent or gritty or serious or sad for me. Like I’ll scroll through Hulu and every show seems to feature people glaring and sullen. When I do watch something, it’s usually a half hour comedy. We don’t have Netflix, but we do have Hulu, Disney, Max, Peacock, and Prime. Sometimes I feel like I’m missing out by not having Netflix, but I figure there will always be something to watch on the services that we do have, so my sense of FOMO is kind of unnecessary. Some of my favorite shows I watched in 2024:

-Starstruck (Max)- So funny and sweet and relatable, this show is about Jess who has a one night stand with a huge movie star and the fall out from that. I don’t usually like protagonists who are screw ups, but there is something so fresh and honest about Jess that I ended up loving her. I’m half way through the last season and I can’t bring myself to finish watching it because I don’t want it to end.

-Sort Of (Max)- Gender fluid Sabi navigates the dynamics within their Pakistani family and their job as a nanny. This is a show about learning to accept yourself and those around you.

-Acapulco (Apple) – Cute show, told in flashbacks, about young Maximo who starts out as a pool boy at a luxury Mexican resort and rises through the ranks. I like this show for it’s feel-good, sunny humour and the 80s playlists.

-English Teacher (FX/Hulu) – Really funny and sharp comedy about a gay teacher in Austin trying to fight the system and sometimes giving up.

LIVE PERFORMANCES
High School/Middle School Musicals. I didn’t do theatre in middle school or high school. (Shocking, I know, considering it’s now what I do for my job.), so I didn’t really grow up going to school plays. Turns out the high schools in our area do really great shows. This year we saw Beauty and the Beast and A Year with Frog and Toad at the high school as well as middle school productions of Annie and Charlie and the Chocolate Factory. They were all delightful. There is something special about going to see a show where you know the kids onstage and where you’ll run into people you know in the audience, a show where things probably won’t be perfect, but everyone is having a once in a life time experience. The high school is doing Secret Garden this spring – I CAN’T WAIT!!!

Silent Night – is this cheating if it’s a show I worked on myself?. I love this opera so much. The music, the story, the bagpipes. I feel so lucky that I got to work on it again this year, and that I got to hear this exquisite score played over the course of four performances.

The Play That Goes Wrong – I think sometimes we go to the theatre to be moved to tears. I know certainly that’s true for opera – we want to see the soprano die and everyone to be devastated. But this play, about an amateur production of a murder mystery where everything goes wrong, made me laugh and laugh and laugh so hard. From identifying with the Stage Manager who loses track of the place and forgets to run a sound cue, to the actors forgetting their lines, to the doorknobs that keep falling off the set. This was an exquisitely timed masterpiece of comedy. Some of the technical aspects were amazing.

ART and MUSEUMS
Mary Cassatt at the Philadelphia Museum of Art – I’ve always been a fan of Cassatt’s art, and this exhibit was a wonderful exploration of her process.

National Museum of Taiwan History in Tainan – My cousin recommended this museum to us, and I’m really glad we made time to go while we were in Taiwan. It was a really well laid out and comprehensive look at Taiwan from it’s early days as a trading port through all the various states of occupation, to present day history.

Museum of Islamic Art in Kuala Lumpur – Stunning art and fascinating history. It was eye opening to see the intersection of Muslim and Asian cultures.

Lobster Museum in Swann’s Island, Maine – Okay so this was basically some guy’s attic collection of lobster men memorabilia that the town decided to put into a building, but I loved it.

Dorothea Lange: Seeing People at the National Gallery of Art – The title says it all – haunting portraits taken by Lange throughout the years. Some well known and iconic, and some that were new to me. The pictures taken in Japanese internment camps were especially poignant.

Pattens and Paradox: The Quilts of Amish Women at the American Art Museum – I learned so much about the art of quilts from this exhibit, which also make me think about the women who made quilts and the intersection between art and functionality and folk art and high art.

MUSIC – Looking at this list, I’m realizing one thing that’s missing is music. I don’t listen to a lot of music in a curated way. That is to say I don’t tend to listen to specific artists or albums. If I want to listen to something I’ll often just listen to the radio and see what serendiptiy brings, or I’ll type some inspirational words, like “Happy dinner” or “Bluegrass excercise” into Spotify or Apple Music and see what play lists come up. I think this is partly because I am surrounded by music at work, so music isn’t the first thing I turn to in my liesure time. Even still I do get a lot of enjoyment from music. This year, I re-discovered the joy of big romantic sweeping musicals (Scarlet Pimpernel, Titanic, etc.), and of just listening to the classical music station when I needed to decompress. As a family we listen to a lot of Disney songs and musicals (SIX is a favorite), and whatever the husband has playing on Pandora (his mix is pretty eclectic, but always has a strong beat and a good tune). Do I feel like I need to change my music habits? Not really. I do feel like I’m out of the pop culture loop, but hey I can’t keep up with everything.

That’s it for my 2024 Media favorites. What about you? Any favorite books/podcasts/movies/tv shows/music/art/ etc. that you discovered in 2024? What music do you recommend for me?
Any goals and aspirations for your media consumption in 2025?

Twenty Hats I’ve Worn – a post for NGS

A few months ago, when Engie asked me to write a guest post for her blog to help celebrate her twenty years as a blogger, I had so many ideas. Ultimately I chose to write about opera because it’s something I know very well, but this other idea kept knocking around in my head, percolating. So I thought, during this her blogiversary month, what better way to pay tribute to Engie than to write one more post in her honor – a post all about HATS!

I am an unabashed hat person. I love wearing hats. I am not particularly stylish in most of my wardrobe, but I do like the whimsy of wearing a hat. I used to be a scarf person, but those tend to get in the way when I’m working. These days, I don’t feel like my outfit is complete unless I have a hat on. I like how it can complete a basic or spare look. I like how a hat can cover up my hair when I’m having a bad hair day. I like how a hat can protect me from the sun in the summer and the cold in the winter. I like how hats are slightly out of fashion, so it’s a pretty easy way for me to have a unique fashion quirk. Often my hats are what people remember about me. I once was working with a director for the umpteenth time, and on the first day of rehearsal, I ran into them as we were walking down the hall to rehearsal, and they looked at me blankly at first then they got a light of “aha!” in their eyes. “I didn’t recognize you without a hat!” they said. Seriously – I’ve worked with director at least once every year or two for fifteen years.

Then there was the director who forbade me to wear hats in rehearsal. “It makes me feel as if you are ready to pick up and leave,” he said. He was a horrid troll of a man and believe me, I was tempted to many many times.

Imagine how delighted it makes me that Engie looks for hats everywhere – in the wild of life and in the books she reads. So to celebrate her, I’m going to send her an internet flood of hats. Here are twenty hats I’ve worn. (Literally.) I don’t have pictures for all the hats, so you’ll just have to imagine some of them. (Maybe if I get back to my parent’s house I can scan some pictures and update this post). I also had to dig deep into my own shoe boxes of photos to find some of these pictures. I can’t believe I’m about to post college-era photos of me on the internet… Also – how on earth did people take photos and post them on personal blogs (or really any blog) before smartphones? I don’t have a scanner so many of these older pictures are a picture I snapped of the photo. Sorry for the glare. Also- I feel like these pictures make it seem like I’m some kind of international globe trotter, but really it’s just that the majority of pictures I have of myself were taken on vacation over the course of twenty years. I’m pretty sure the Husband has more pictures of me than I do.

Anyhow, here’s the list – 20 (literal) hats I have worn:

1. My dad’s olive green winter toque. I don’t remember this hat, but there are pictures of me as a baby wearing it and it’s freakin’ adorable.

2. White kitty cat hat. When I was a kid, my grandmother (I think) knitted me an adorable winter hat that had cat ears on it. I would always get comments when I wore this hat. Also freakin’ adorable.

3. Blue corduroy cap. When I was in fifth or sixth grade or so, our school participated in a fundraiser for the Canadian Heart Foundation called Jump Rope for Heart. One of the lower level prizes was a blue cap with the Jump Rope for Heart logo on it. I thought this hat was VERY stylish. It might have elevated my baggy sweatshirt and comfy pants look of my pre-teen years.

4. Straw hat with red flowers. One of the first hats I had as a “grown up”, this hat came with me on many adventures. I got this hat in college and wore it until it was in shreds.

My dad and I hiking in Taiwan. You can see a hole already in the brim of the hat.

5. Straw hat with lace band. I bought this hat in Taiwan, when I went after graduating from college. I bought it at a very fancy Taiwanese department store and it felt very grown up to have bought it. I once left this hat in a college dorm while on a Glee Club tour in Puerto Rico. I arrived at the airport, realized I didn’t have the hat, and all on my own took a cab back to the campus to get this hat back. I had never taken a cab on my own before in my life, and I didn’t have enough money to give the driver a tip. Oh I felt so very very un-adult at in that moment. But I got my hat back.

With my friend on that Puerto Rico Glee Club tour.

6. Dark blue Scala cotton sun hat. I bought this hat twenty years ago before going on vacation somewhere. I don’t remember where. This hat is still in rotation and now so faded that it is almost grey. It’s actually a very popular hat – I still see it on people all the time – so I could replace it, even though it’s been at least 15 years since I originally bought it.

7. Electric Blue Sun hat. I got this hat in college. It has also been with me on many adventures and I still wear it. One of the best features of this hat is that it is packable, so I can just squish it up and stuff it in a suitcase.

In my senior year dorm room with my first boyfriend.

8. White floppy hat. I don’t have much memory of this hat, but I do have a picture of it. I do remember that I picked it because I wanted a plain hat that I could add my own ribbon to. In this picture I added a green ribbon.

At the Sutro Baths in San Francisco. Circa early 2000s.

9. Red beret with plaid band. I bought this hat from a hat stand in D.C. when I was in college. When I had one of my first internships out of college, I would wear it every single day, and it became somewhat of a signature item for me. I think at the time I thought it was cool to have a signature item that I wore every day. I think now it might be thought of as quirky, even odd and maybe unhygienic. Also unfortunately about the time I was wearing this red beret every day, was a certain incident with a certain intern who was captured in a famous picture hugging a certain U.S. President while she wore a beret. The beret became kind of a loaded item, but I didn’t quite realize that at the time. I lost this hat on a bus home from New York City, and I’ve been sad about it’s loss ever since.

10. Green knit beanie. This hat was given to me by a lady who sang in the chorus of a production of Romeo et Juliette on which I was the Assistant Director in 2004. At the time I didn’t love it because it was so obviously a winter hat, but I kept it and twenty years later it’s one of my favorite hats. I love it because it is easy to wear and adds a splash of color to my outfit. I’ve had people I’ve worked with randomly give me hats – some of them are more practical than others. This green knit cap is very practical. The black 1950s hat that requires a lot of hair and hat pins is not.

That little baby a couple years later! One of the more impractical hats I’ve been gifted. People often give me their, “I’m cleaning out my mother’s closet and thought of you” hats. I love them as works of art, but they are not practical to wear.

11. Burgundy velvet bucket hat. I wish I had a picture of this hat. I wore it a lot in my 20s. It was very stylish – I liked a hat with a bit of a brim. But it was also a very hot hat to wear since the lining was made of polyester.

11. Red cap. The Husband bought me this cap early in our relationship. I love the look of it, but it does not stay on my head very well, so I don’t wear it as much as I would like. But I’ve worn it for many family photos and I wore this hat to my wedding.

12. Red Beret. I don’t think it’s technically a beret, though. This hat was a gift from a friend/ co-worker after I lost the red beret with the plaid band. I still have this one, and wear it frequently since it works well in all seasons. This is the hat that I’m wearing in my headshot. I like red hats.

The youngest when she was just a barely born little squirt.

13. Purple knit hat. My aunt in Taiwan mad this hat for me. There is a matching scarf. It is very warm in the winter.

My grandmother and me at a Taipei food court. She was one of the most elegant ladies I’ve ever known.

14. Checked cap. When I got married in 2019, my friend had a bachelorette party in my honor that she called, “Hats off to Diane!” It involved a bar crawl and everyone bringing me a hat. This checked cap is one that still wear a lot. My friend, L, who gave it for me said, “I figured with the red, white, and black pattern it will go with everything.” She was so right.

The oldest took this picture at the Kogod Courtyard.

15. Blue cap with plaid lining. This was one of my first caps that I incorporated into my wardrobe. I liked that it’s brim was tilted up to reveal a blue and yellow plaid lining. A costume lady I once worked with loved this hat so much that she made a pattern of it and made one for herself. It was kind of magical to me that someone could just look at an article of clothing and draft a pattern.

16. Azure blue cap. This is another hat that I wear frequently these days. I can’t remember where or when I got this cap, but I was looking for a hat to replace the above mentioned blue cap with plaid lining. I like wearing this hat these days because it matches my shoes. It was kind of a cheap purchase and the brim’s wire tends to bend and warp out of place, so I do have to periodically straighten it.

Another picture of me dining out with the baby middle kid.

17. Tuba Christmas hat. Almost every year since the Husband and I started dating, we go to MerryTuba Christmas. A couple years ago, we decided that Tuba Christmas would be more fun if we wore swag so we got matching Tuba Christmas hats.. I love this hat so much- it’s slightly ridiculous and keeps my head warm.

Me and the youngest at a selfie stand in the park.

18. My bike helmet. One of the most important hats that I wear.

19. My father in law’s sun hat. My father-in-law was a very practical man. Everything he had was for a purpose and served that purpose very very well. He was also a very prudent and frugal man, so if he bought something you knew it was a quality object. This sun hat of his is definitely that.

The middle kid, hiking during COVID times.

20. Red floppy sun hat. This is my latest addition to my hat collection. I bought it last year on a day to Annapolis with my friend E. I was looking for a new sunhat and my favorite colour is red so this one was perfect.

Well that’s twenty hats. There certainly are more hats I’ve worn in my life, but those were some of the highlights. Also- I don’t know that I ever need to make another post with so many pictures of myself on it ever again…

Now…. Here’s a challenge for you, friends! Do you have a hat in your life? In honor of Engie’s 20th blog anniversary month, find time in September to post about a hat that you’ve also worn so that Engie can continue to find hats in the world!

Random Friday Post: 9 Things I Love in a Public Restroom

The awesome hooks in the bathroom at the Amsterdam airport. I thought them so stylish that I took a picture.

Last summer, the restroom stalls at the rehearsal hall where I worked had a shelf. It was the perfect shelf, waist high and just wide enough for my cell phone. It made me so happy every time I went to the bathroom stall to have a place to put my phone and not have to worry about my it falling out of my pocket when I was peeing. It got me thinking of all the things I like in a public restroom. Which I know is a little random, but it’s been percolating, so here you go:

1) A shelf for my phone. As mentioned above. And, if not a shelf, at the verrry least a hook. Best if it’s a double hook. Or more than one. And it it’s high up enough that my stuff doesn’t drag on the ground. I don’t understand not having a hook in a women’s bathroom stall. Well any bathroom stall, but particularly a women’s. Because I always have a purse or bag or something with me. Or in the winter time, my coat. I want to hang that stuff up while I pee. Which also makes me wonder… where do men put their bags and coats when they use urinals?

2) Clean. I mean, it’s obvious, but had to be said. I’m partial somewhat to a bathroom that smells like PineSol, like the bathrooms of my elementary school.

3) Almond scented hand soap. This is my favorite public bathroom hand soap smell and it makes me so happy when I come across it. It reminds me of almond jelly, one of my favorite Taiwanese desserts. Also while we’re here – soap at every sink. How often do you go into a public bathroom and there is a row of sinks and one single soap dispenser all the way to the far side? And you have to “Pardon me, excuse me, so sorry!” your way past someone else to get to the soap and then back again to your sink.

4) A foot pedal flush. This might be asking a lot, but I do appreciate when there is a foot pedal. I will fully admit that I do use my foot to flush the toilet periodically. I have started just using my hand because when I think about it, it’s kind of an irrational germaphobic reaction to toilet handles since I’m about to wash my hands anyway. But then I think – If I use my foot to flush toilets, other people must, so maybe it is dirtier than I think…. I don’t know. I go back and forth on this one. Which is why I love a foot pedal flush because it takes all the overthinking out of it.

5) A changing table. Because I have kids and there are few things worse than changing a baby on a window sill. While we’re at it, I’m always delighted when there is a step stool for little kids so I don’t have to haul my kid up to wash their hands.

6) A trash can for my used period supplies. Maybe TMI, but there’s nothing I hate more than having to carry a balled up, used pad to the trash can outside the stall. I mean there are probably things I hate more – people who don’t use their turn signals, for one – but this one seems pretty unnecessary. Just put a receptacle for the used pads and wrappers in the stall, please! Ooooh, once in a while, I come across a bathroom that has little baggies for your used period product. I actually appreciate this quite a lot.

7) A full length mirror. And not opposite the toilet. I kid you not – the bathroom backstage at work has a full length mirror opposite the toilet. I do not want to watch myself pee. Makes me think that these bathrooms were designed for/by men. (probably true, given the demographics of the stage crew.) I mean I get the full length mirror in the single bathroom backstage – we often use bathrooms for costume changes. But…. there is a a whole expanse of wall. Put that mirror somewhere else. Or on the back of the door. Nonetheless, I do like having a full length mirror somewhere in my bathroom experience so I can do a quick once over before I leave.

8) Good soft lighting. Because while we’re at the above point, why have a full length mirror if the lighting is shit? Public bathrooms are awkward uncomfortable enough. Why aggravate it with bad lighting?

9) And to go along with #8 – warm. It’s nice when it’s warm. At Longwood Gardens, they have these bathrooms in trailers. They are soooo nice. Mostly because they are warm. Cold bathroom make things so unpleasant.

What are your favorite features to find in a public restroom?

25 Better and Brilliant Things, 2022

Admittedly, the first day of February feels very late to reflect on the year that was – I’ve seen 2022 reflection posts pop up starting the end of November, so this definitely feels behind the ball. Oh well. Here are 25 things that made my life better or brilliant in 2022. It is by no means comprehensive – I’m sure there are a million better and brilliant things I’ve left off, but it’s a start. Not all of them were things that were new in 2022, just new to me or even re-discovered in 2022.

BETTER and BRILLIANT VERBS:

1. Toilet Training -The 3 year old is fully day time toilet trained!!! Both my older kids toilet trained quite old – the oldest one was almost three and the middle one was three and a half. So toilet training the youngest wasn’t really on my radar last year. My mother, however, decided that she wanted to try. Bless her. I’m not sure what magic she did, but the baby was toilet trained by the time she was 2.5 years old, both poop and pee. She is still in a diaper at night, but I figure that is definitely easier than having to change sheets. I was a little sad to pack up our stash of cloth diapers, but I’m so glad not to not have to carry a diaper bag anymore.

2. Tap to Camera: Did you know you can program your iPhone to do certain things when you tap the back of it? (Elisabeth knows, because I commented about this on her blog :)) This was probably my most mind-blowing discovery last year. (Maybe hyperbole. Maybe not.)
Settings –> Accessiblity –> Touch –> Back Tap
Then you can choose a function for when you Double Tap and when you Triple Tap. I’ve set my phone up so that when I tap twice on the back of the phone, the camera will open. No more swiping until I find the camera icon – so much cleaner and faster. I love it. I also love how Accessibility features really make things better for everyone.

3. Spinning to Choose – with three kids, there is always a fight over who gets to go first. Who gets to pick the first book, who gets to sit in the middle, who gets to go first for “Rose, Buds, and Thorns”, etc. etc. This year, we solved this problem by implementing a spinner. I’m sure you can get a paper one, but we use an online one. The Husband uses an app. This simple tool has cut out so many arguments. Because you can’t really argue with a spinner.

4. Bike Commuting and Running– My bike has sat in the garage since before the three year old was born. Before kids, I used to bike to work – five miles one way – but after kids, I sort of fell out of the habit. This year, we bought the 11 year old a bike, and when he went to pick it up, the Husband took my bike in for a tune up. Pretty soon, I was back to bike commuting. The first few weeks were pretty hard, but I took it slow, walked the bike uphill when I needed to. I loved getting that bit exercise endorphin before I start my work day. It’s been too cold to bike commute lately, but hopefully I’ll be back at it for my next show. On the same subject – in late 2021 the middle kid attended Sunday Mandarin school. Parents weren’t allowed to sit in class because of COVID precautions, so I started going on little runs/walks while he was in class. Last year, I decided that I wanted to make running more of a routine. I didn’t really have any exercise routine and something about turning 40 made me think about ways to combat my mortality. Exercise is on all the lists of healthy habits so it seemed like a good idea. So in 2022, I started finding time to run. It also helped that I went back to work where I could find child-free time to run on my dinner break. I bought running shoes. (My last pair were at least 10 years old and the soles were falling off). I found a “Walk to Run 1 Mile” podcast, and just started there. I still don’t love the act of running, but I realize that it has helped my mental and physical health immensely, so I’ll keep at it.

5. Brushing my teeth with the kids: I’ve been working on removing barriers to going to bed at a decent time, and one of them had been the litany of things I felt necessary to do before I actually got into bed, including brushing my teeth. Last fall I started brushing my teeth with the kids during their bedtime routine, and suddenly one of the barriers to bedtime was removed early in the evening. Also has the side benefit that I don’t snack in the evenings anymore. (My hack for two minute teeth brushing is this two minute podcast. The kids won’t brush without it.)

6. Travel: Even though we had done a few overnights and camping trips, in 2022 we took our first big family vacations in two and a half years. In April we went to The Smoky Mountains for Spring Break, and in August we rented a van and drove up to Montreal, stopping at various places along the way. (I still want to do a recap of the Montreal trip here… just haven’t gotten to it.) After the past two years staying within a 2 hour radius of home, it felt so special to get away and to see new things. Both trips were a nice combination of activities and relaxation, and I realized that both are pretty important to me on a vacation. I want to see all the things, but I also want to sit outside and read my book. We have one big trip planned for this year (who knows if we’ll be able to afford another), and I’m looking forward to it.

7. Going Back to Work: This was one of the big things from 2022. After being unemployed for almost two years – aside from a couple supertitle gigs at the end of 2021 – in February 2022 I finally was back at my home opera company doing opera for an audience. There was very frequent COVID testing and masking and, yes COVID continued to be thing and threw many obstacles in our way. Even still, after two year of wiping noses and behinds and tears it felt so great to be with grown ups, putting opera up onstage.

BETTER and BRILLIANT THINGS

8. Vox Books – Our library has these books that have an audio box built into them. They come in a variety of picture books, but also early readers and non-fiction books too. It reminded me of those books on tape that I had growing up, where there was a “ding” and you knew to turn the page. Vox Books were fantastic for the two little kids, and even the 11 year old was into them. They were such a life saver when I really didn’t have the energy or time to read to them because they could operate the books on their own, making them a great screen free way to spend some independent quiet time. Some of our favorites were The Couch Potato, Frog and Toad, and the National Geographic non-fiction series. There was also a series in Chinese, which I thought was nice for getting some of the language in the kids’ ears.

9. Bedside Lamp: One of my constant goals is better sleep hygeine (see above -“Teethbrushing with kids.”), specifically to cut down on the screens before bed and go to sleep at a decent time. Decent is relative and in my case it means before midnight. I do like to read before bed and I found that reading on my phone or iPad often lead to the temptation to scroll and go down internet rabbit holes. So this year, I got a lamp for my bedside and started reading hard copy books before bed. I’m shocked that it took me this long to figure this one out. It doesn’t work every night, but I’ve spent more nights with a paper book in hand rather than random internet holes and I’ve noticed the paper book leads to an easier winddown and I fall asleep faster.

10. Flip Belt: I had originally gotten this running belt to hold my phone and keys while running, but then I started wearing it backstage. When I went back to work, I had no black pants that really fit so I mostly wore my old maternity pants. Only problem was maternity pants have a very loose elastic waistband and no belt loops and non existent pocket – so not practical at all for being backstage. I needed something to which to clip the beltpack for my headset and I also needed to be able to carry my phone and a Sharpie. So one day, I had the brilliant idea of using my Flip Belt backstage. It was perfect; it’s strong enough to hold up the beltpack and I can carry my phone and a couple Sharpies in it as well. And for all the same reasons, wearing a Flip Belt made it possible to wear a dress backstage, which I like to do periodically.

11. Leggings with Tech Pockets: 2022 was also the year that I crawled out from under my rock and discovered there existed leggings with pockets. I know. It’s kind of ridiculous that it took me this long to realize that even though I had embraced leggings with my first pregnancy. Similar to the Flipbelt, leggings with pockets allowed me to wear comfy dresses at work, but still have a place to keep my phone. But also … I use a Hobonichi Weeks as my work planner/notebook, and it is slim enough that it fits into the tech pockets of my leggings. Now I can be running around in rehearsal or backstage and always have my notebook with me.

12. Straw Lids: I drink a lot of water. I love water. I also love cold water, so I have several insulated water bottles. However, I don’t like unscrewing water bottles to drink – it’s messy and requires two hands. My preference is for a straw top. But my favorite water bottles do not come with straw tops; they came with screw tops. I always thought my options were – the bottle size and shape I wanted or a straw top. Well, this year I discovered that one can just buy a straw top for one’s water bottle. This is another of those things where if I dig around a little, I discover that I don’t have to just live with the original features of something. Such a simple solution. I’ve replaced all my water bottle tops with straw tops.

13. Bombas Socks – Several years ago, when my friend told me that Bombas Socks were simply the best sock out there, I didn’t really think anything of it because, honestly, they seemed awfully expensive for socks and I’ve always been a little skeptical of anything with a cult following. But last winter, I was trying to replace my Costco brand Merino wool socks and it turns out they were discontinued, so I gave in to the hype and ordered myself some Bombas. Reader, they were life changing. These socks are soft and thick, and just the right amount of snug to be secure but not too tight. They wear like iron, yet don’t chafe. I love them so much that I’ve become quite protective of them – gone are the days when I just toss my socks in the laundry basket to be washed, and then never get a matching pair back. The Bombas go into a lingerie bag to get washed so that I know where they are so that they always come back in pairs and no one else in the family will try to wear them. The family knows that the Bombas are for mom only. Wear them at your peril.

BETTER AND BRILLIANT FOOD THINGS:

14. Favorite new dinner to use up veggies – This year I discovered Sheet Pan Gnocchi and it has become one of my favorite ways to clean out the vegetable drawer and get dinner on the table in 30 minutes. Basically you take whatever veggies you have on hand, cut them up to a size that will roast in 20 minutes, mix the veggies and gnocchi in a bowl with olive oil, salt, pepper and whatever herbs and spices you want. Then throw it all in a single layer in a sheet pan and roast at 400 for 20-30 minutes. Easy prep, easy clean up, tasty dinner. What’s more brilliant than that? (It also reminds me of a tip once I heard that the first step for getting dinner on the table is that the first thing you do when you walk in the door after work is either put a pot of water to boil on the stove or preheat the oven. I don’t know why that tip has stuck with me, but something about starting that first step right away makes dinner seem like a very real possibility.)

15. Soda Stream and flavored balsamic vinegars – Back in 2019 my brother gifted me a Soda Stream. He drinks a lot of fizzy water. I liked the idea of the Soda Stream, but could never get it to work, so I put it in the attic. Well, in 2022, for some reason, I thought I’d pull it out and try it again. We had been buying fizzy water by the case from Costco, and while it wasn’t exactly breaking the bank, it also wasn’t the most convenient or eco friendly way to get my bubbly fix. Well, the Soda Stream gets used all the time now. I still drink flat water, but during dinner or when I want something that feels a little special, I’ll fizz myself up some thing. I love how the Soda Stream lets me customize how fizzy I want my water- I like it super fizzy so that it almost burns when going down – and also cuts down on the bottles and cans in the recycling bin.
Also last year, I went on a trip with a girlfriend and we came across a bar which served non-alcoholic drinks that were basically fizzy water mixed with fruit flavored balsamic vinegars. I became immediately obsessed. The sour tang of the vinegar combined with the slight fruity sweetness was just the right hint of flavor to make plain fizzy water feel special. Luckily, the bar was attached to a place that sold flavored balsamic vinegars and I bought several bottles to bring home. My favorites right now are white balsamic peach and blackberry ginger balsamic.

16. Sides from the freezer: I used to be quite snobbish about frozen/ prepared foods. This year, I embraced the brilliant convenience of pulling something out of the freezer, applying heat and having a side dish for dinner. The two things that changed my mind this year: tater tots and frozen edamame. These were two things we always love eating when we go out to eat, and it had never occurred to me that we could enjoy them at home too. Well, no more. They’re in regular dinner time rotation now.

17. Pizza dough from the Italian Deli: This is something the Husband discovered this year – that our favorite Italian deli also sells pizza dough. And it’s far better tasting than the pizza dough that we made at home. While there is something really satisfying about making our own pizza dough, it requires a degree of forethought that we don’t always have come the end of the week when we have our pizza and movie night. The pizza dough from Felippos bakes up beautifully and makes homemade pizza night so much easier. And that’s what we want on a Friday night – easy.

18. New favorite snack, Bobo Oat Bites: I saw these at Costco one day and picked up a box. I’m always looking for new snack options and I liked that these were vegan and gluten free. They are basically dense oat muffins with a dollop of jam inside. I always feel like oats make for a really filling snack and will keep the hunger at bay longer, though I don’t really have any real basis for this thought. These oat bites became my go to after rehearsal snack – portable, filling, and just a little sweet. I will say, the eleven year old did not like them – I think she thought they weren’t sweet enough. Oh well, more for me!

19. Favorite new easy protein, Marinated Beans – I found this recipe for marinated beans in Jenny Rosenstrach’s new cookbook The Weekday Vegetarian (another of my 2022 Better and Brilliant things). I was looking for an easy vegan way to have a protein always ready, particularly for when I came home late at night and wanted something quick. The vegan equivalent of standing in front of the fridge door eating lunch meat out of the package, if you will. These marinated beans were packed with flavor and so versatile. I could toss them in a salad, or with some grains, or just eat them on their own.

BETTER AND BRILLIANT MEDIA I didn’t include books in this – just tv, movies, and podcasts that made life better for me last year.

20. Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries – This was my number one favorite show last year. Cozy murder mysteries, stylish costumes, an intrepid and madcap heroine, an uptight yet kind hero, just a hint of romance simmering. I am so sad they only made three seasons of this show. I watched it on Hoopla via my local library.

21. The Puberty Podcast – Most of the parenting podcasts out there are geared towards younger children. This podcast is one of the few that are focused on older kids. I love that it approaches parenting older kids with a blend of science and empathy. They explain what the physiological changes are and also how to navigate tricky subjects with tweens and teens. And I love that they will often give me the text I need to communicate with my kid. I find often advice books tell you how to approach your kids, but just not the words to use to take that approach. The episodes on body hair, periods, and how to talk about sex with your children were so eye opening to me, and I have used those podcasts to have conversations with my kids.

22. As It Happens – When I was growing up in Canada, we would listen to As It Happens every evening after dinner, an interview style news program on the CBC. Last year I discovered the podcast version of As It Happens and I listen to it every night as I make dinner and it reminds me of my childhood. I wouldn’t call As It Happens hard hitting journalism, but there is something really straightforward and empathetic about the subjects they choose to interview – it’s not always the people who are in the thick of an event – it might be an academic expert, or someone who lives in the adjacent building. What I love is that on this show, it’s okay for the guest to say, “I can’t answer that” because the interviews aren’t really about uncovering the truth, but rather shedding light on the humans behind the story. This show actually drives the Husband nuts because he thinks it is too subjective.

23. Family Movies: We watched some really great family movies this year, ones which weren’t animated features and which also managed to keep all three kids interested. (Well, the 3 year old has minimal interest unless it’s Frozen, to be honest). I feel like these kinds of movie that don’t get made anymore – the true family film that wears it’s heart on its sleeve and is full of positive messages. Some of my favorites we watched this year: Akeelah and the Bee, Secondhand Lions, A Little Princess (1995), Cool Runnings, and Bill and Ted’s Excellent Adventure. (I’ll always take more suggestions!)

24. Long Thoughtful Conversation Podcasts: One of my favorite indulgences is to go on long walks while listening to a good long conversation – you know, those conversations where two people talk about life and living and our place in the world. My go to podcast for this was On Being, the original “What does it mean to be human?” podcast. On Being went on a little pause last year- though they will be back this week! In the meantime, I’ve discovered The Ezra Klein Show, Design Matters with Deborah Millman, and 10% Happier with Dan Harris. Although I will note, listening to these podcasts always makes me grateful that I have the luxury of being able to contemplate the existential life.

25. Bloggers – I started this blog in 2020, and just wrote quietly for a while, keeping in my own little internet corner. I think for the first year or so the only people who read were my mother and an old mentor/colleague. I loved reading other blogs, getting a glimpse into other people’s worlds and thoughts and philosophies and practices. Even still, though I love reading comments, I never really commented myself. All those blogs with lots of comments seemed like such a different level than my vomit of thoughts and recollections and life accountings. I think I’m a pretty private person and very slow to put myself out in front of the world. (Which maybe makes it ironic that I have a blog?). I don’t know what changed, but last year I started leaving comments here and there. I think I was really moved by all the thoughtful things that people were writing about, and wanted to respond to that. And the more I read the comments in other people’s blogs, the more I grew to love the sense of community and engagement that I saw there. And lo and behold, people started visiting on my blog, even leaving pensive comments and bits of humour and words of support and advice. The reciprocity of thought continues to feel like a gift every day and with every post. Discovering that I don’t write in a vacuum has definitely made the list of things that made 2022 Better and Brilliant and Beautiful. I hope you continue to visit and I will do likewise.

What’s making your life better and brilliant these days?

Cozy Things

The weather has been very erratic here these past few weeks. One day it will be high 70s, then next day it will be in the 40s. There was one week, when I was sure that the cool weather was here to stay – it was rainy and chill and everything seemed like it was going to take a lot of effort. And so my mind turned towards things that I like to be cozy and warm. Of course the next week, the weather was back up in the 70s and sunny sunny sunny. But some of the cozy things had already been implemented. Being cozy gives me such joy, that I thought I’d share my list of cozy things….

Car Blankets – My car is quite old and it takes a while for the heat to kick in, so I keep blankets in the car for the kids. They buckle up, then I tuck the blankets around them up to their chins and it keeps them cozy til the heat starts up.

A Cup of Tea – Tea in a mug to warm my hands and tea in my travel cup so that it is still warm three hours later when I finally sit down and have a sip. I don’t drink coffee, but I do drink a lot of tea, particularly when the weather gets cool. My tea of choice is the strong black stuff – Irish Breakfast, Oolong, or Lapsang Souchong. In the evenings when I wans something a little more gentle, I like Celestial Seasonings Honey Vanilla Chamomile.

Oatmeal – my go to cold weather breakfast. I like it savory with soy sauce, sesame oil and a little bit of ume plum vinegar, topped with scallions, ginger and a soy egg, kind of like congee. I also like it sweet with berries, nuts, maple syrup and cinnamon.

Flannel Sheets – As much as I love the feeling of cool cotton in the summer, I love the warmth of slipping between flannel sheets in the winter. Unfortunately the Husband sleeps hot, so we don’t always put them on the bed.

Leggings and Booties – I don’t know if leggings and booties actually keep me warmer than just pants and wool socks, but I sure feel cozy wearing them. Maybe it’s a sartorial placebo effect.

A Stack of Books – Nothing says cozy to me like curling up on a couch, a throw blanket on my lap with a nice book to absorb me. I’ve decided this winter I’m going to read some nice thick tomes. I’ve started The Weight of Ink by Rachel Kadish, and it’s pretty good so far.

Sweaters and Robes – A few Christmases ago, the Husband and the ten year old got me a long hooded cardigan from Eddie Bauer. It is a blend of cotton/acrylic/polyester/wool and oh so warm and big enough to swallow me up. When I am cold, I put it on, pull the sleeves over my hands, and put the hood up and shiver. It’s like having a warm hug.

Slippers – Okay, I actually wear my wool slippers all year round, but cooler weather makes them imperative. I bought myself a pair of Glerups boiled woos slippers when the baby was born three years ago, and I had to replace them this year because I had worn holes in them. This time I’m going for the rubber soles so that I can periodically wear them outside if I need to run something to the recycling bin.

Wool Socks – along the lines of slippers… wool socks are a must this time of year. I splurged on some Bombas last year and they are everything I want in a sock. I used to share socks with the ten year old, but everyone now knows that the Bombas are only for mom.

Baking – Haven’t done much of that yet so far, but I did get a Bundt pan this year and I’m looking forward to making things in it. Tasty things that I can nibble on while I drink tea and read a book while under a blanket.

Any cozy things in your life lately?