gratitude – Page 6 – Life Off Headset

Weekly recap + what we ate: Countdown to end of summer!

Last week, I had one day of work to wrap up things in the office and archive paperwork, and then I was home the rest of the week with the two older kids. The youngest still went to daycare. It was a very full and frustrating week. I felt like I was still catching up on sleep, trying to get my body back on a regular sleep schedule after the week of tech – there were a lot of late nights – my own fault! Revenge bedtime procrastination was definitely in play. And then trying to do fun and productive things. Things definitely skewed fun over than productive. The house definitely becomes a pit much faster when we are all home during the day- clothes, toys, books, food, dishes – it all piles up. And then it’s physically exhausting to be constantly cleaning and mentally/emotionally exhausting to constantly nag the kids to keep things picked up. We do need to think of better systems.

We did have a family meeting about the laundry last week and the kids decided that laundry would be put away when they get into pjs. We aren’t super great about enforcing routine clean up habits. I think this is also because the Husband and I are very different about this – he likes to constantly clean and I like to clean all the one go at the end of the night. So no wonder the kids are getting mixed messages about how to maintain a baseline level of tidiness. I’m hoping getting their input in when the laundry gets put away will help it actually get done.

Something I Learned this Week:
–Nothing draws a kid to step on your toes like your toes being broken It is amazing. It is as if a broken toe exudes a magnetic force that just draws kids (or at least my kids) to step on it. On Sunday, a week ago, I walked into a door frame. I don’t really think I broke my baby toe, but it hurt like a bejeezus for a few days. I have many friends who have broken toes and the verdict was if it wasn’t blue and sticking out sideways it is probably fine. Then a few hours later, I tripped while walking up our exterior back steps and badly stubbed my big toe on the opposite foot – I thought I was going to lose a toenail, but it has stayed in tact so far. I never noticed how much my kids step on my toes until my toes are in excruciating pain. What is with that? Do they have some kind of hidden talent for hurting me where it hurts the most? And they don’t even realize. This is the conversation, repeated many many many times:
Me: Don’t step on my toe!
Child: Ooops! Sorry! I didn’t know your toe was there!
Also – this is what gets me – don’t you notice when you are standing on something? Or is this a princess and the pea situation where only the most sensitive will notice the toe sized lump under their foot??
Okay – my toes seem fine now. A little tender still, but I’ve been walking on it an everything. Haven’t been running, but that is probably more life and having the kids at home than really about the toe.

Fourt Signs of Late Summer:

School supply shopping. While the 6 year old’s school sent a school supply list, there was nothing form the middle school. At first I thought, “Wait, maybe no one expects middle schooler to have school supplies?” If I thought elementary school was a huge information vacuum compared to daycare, it seems like middle school is a black hole. (Is that even an appropriate analogy? I’m not an astrophysicist.) The 11 year old had an ice cream social for incoming sixth graders. We got to the school and there was a sign that said, “Come back and pick up your kids at 1:30pm.” What? I just send them in there? At 1:30pm I came back and the Assistant Principal was out front reminding us of the practice mini day coming up. “Are parents supposed to come to that?” I asked.

“No! No! You just send them to us. They need to get used to figuring it out on their own,” was the reply.

Oh my. Okay.

Anyhow, I hadn’t received a school supply list and I texted a friend with a high schooler to ask, “Do they still get school supply lists in middle school?” I mean maybe this was just one of those things that I don’t know since I’ve never had a middle schooler. Turns out there is a list of sorts. My friend forwarded me the email that was sent via the PTA listerv. Another thing I have to get on. So list in hand we went to Staples.

I love school supplies. While I appreciate the efficiency of schools that create a lump package through some retailer, I do love actually going and wandering the aisles of Staples. Moreso than my kids. They do not appreciate the way I look at every single pen, or Post-It or compare notebooks and binders. They were definitely done with the process before I was. Sigh.

We also got a new back pack for the 11 year old. I figured since she was off to middle school, she needed a new sturdy backpack. She’s had the Lands End backpacks for most of elementary school, but I’ve found that they don’t hold up really well since she is very rough on them. (In kindergarten she had a backpack from Target with a some licensed character on it – I can’t remember what. It was very pink and shiny. That did not last even one year. A friend of mine says if her kids want character backpacks from Target, she always buys two because then when it rips halfway through the school year, she’s prepared.) The 6 year old has an L.L. Bean backpack – and those are nice and sturdy; I’ve had my L.L. Bean backpack since college. But the L.L. Bean backpacks don’t have the sternum clip and the 11 year old really needs something with a sternum clip since she will be walking and maybe biking to school. Someone had suggested that we check out REI for a backpack, and indeed that was where we found her a backpack – The North Face Borealis – lots of pockets, tough material, laptop sleeve, and most importantly a sternum clip. More than I had expected to pay for a backpack, but I think it will really hold up and actually it will be great for travelling adventures too. The patterns aren’t as exciting as Lands End, but I think it’s a nice colour that will grow with her, and she’ll hopefully like it just as much in three years as she does now.

Things from the garden. I’ve been in hard core kitchen nesting phase, where I just make things in the kitchen – It’s probably a result of having not really had any good kitchen puttering time yet this summer. I normally love spending time in the kitchen, whether it’s just cooking dinner, or baking, or making kitchen experiments. The Husband has been growing cucumbers and tomatoes (among other things). He is the kind of gardener that loves to grow things, but doesn’t always harvest it in time. A lot of it is over ripe, not really suitable for eating raw, so I’ve been making other things with it. The cucumber has been made into cucumber agua fresca, cucumber lemonade and cucumber yogurt soup. This latter is not really something I usually am partial to. I like my soup to be hot and chunky with texture and variety. But a friend suggested a cold cucumber curry soup, and I used this recipe as a basis, except using curry powder instead of dill. It was very tasty, but in my mind cold soup is kind of like a savory smoothie – which, once I phrased it to myself like that, it was a very nice snack to have on a very hot day.

The tomatoes I have made into tomato sauce. No recipe – just chopped two large bowls of tomatoes, mixed with a sliced onion or two, lots of garlic (like half a bulb), olive oil, salt. Roasted at 450 for an hour. Let cool, then run through the food mill. The food mill is one of those single function tools which I use maybe twice a year, but which does its one job oh so well.

It feels really satisfying and good to be messing around in the kitchen again.

Summer Day Trip. We also went to see my friend at her new house over on the southern tip of Maryland – it took about two hours to get there. She has a pool and lives on a cove with a dock on said cove. It was just a lovely relaxing day – we swam in her pool, we walked to the dock and saw lots of fish and jelly fish. We even saw a crab swimming. I’d never seen a crab swim before – it swims sideways, paddling furiously all its legs. My friend grilled us a tasty dinner, with a fantastic German potato salad on the side (note to self, get her recipe), and then we went to visit her neighbor who had sheep. I don’t know if I could live so far from the city all the time, but our quiet, calm, and nature filled day with my friend certainly made a case for it.

The County Agricultural Fair. We went to the County fair one day. We saw animals – rabbits, chickens, turkeys, cows. There was a cow giving birth; we stayed to watch the water break then the lady in charge said it might be another hour until the calf was born so we didn’t stay for that. (I did see a calf being born one year – it was kind of amazing. One moment there was one cow, the next moment, all the a whoosh, there was a baby cow, walking and everything.).

We did go check out some of the entertainment, but I found the escape artist kind of cringe-y and chauvinist. He had this act where an audience member puts him in a strait jacket, and I was just really uncomfortable with his double entendres the whole time. I’m sure he’s someone who does the fair circuit, but I would be glad never to see him again.

And then went to the Midway and we rode rides and ate fair food. Our fair feels quite standard and modest. We probably have the same rides and food booths and over priced lemonade that you would see at any other county fair. But even still, it’s a good time. The 11 year old and I like riding rides – I don’t have the courage to do the upside down ones; I’m always afraid that my glasses will fall off. But I like the big swings and the twirly rides and the roller coasters, though there aren’t really roller coasters at the fair. I do not like bumper cars. This year we got the unlimited ride wristbands for the 11 year old and me. In past years I only got a limited number of tickets, but I figured that the oldest is of an age where it makes more sense to get the wrist bands. We got the little kids enough tickets to ride a few rides. The Husband does not like rides, but he is a stellar bag holder and child watcher. The six year old only wanted slow rides and the 3 year old wanted fast rides. She was too small to ride the super fast rides, but we found a couple that were quite zippy for her and she had fun.

The 11 year old said to me at one point that a good ride had to be just scary enough to be fun, which I thought was an interesting metric. Around 7:30pm, the husband took the two little kids home and I stayed and rode rides with the 11 year old, which was nice because we don’t often get just mommy/daughter time since the little kids take a lot of attention.

On the shuttle back to the parking lot we talked to a lady who grew up showing cows at this fair. “You saw the animals, right?” she said to us, “You don’t come to the fair just to ride the rides, right?” I do wish we had spent more time with the animals, but we arrived at 3:30pm, and by then a lot of the animal stuff was winding down. Next year, I think we’ll plan to arrive earlier.

Now I truly understand the term “Sheep eyes”.

Ice Cream Adventures – We haven’t had as many ice cream adventures as we usually do. My how work gets in the way of fun! But last weekend we had no plans so we got in the car and drove to Prigel Family Creamery. On the way, we played this game:

It was a lot of fun – we all laughed so hard. Highly recommend. One of my favorite cards: “Is the Driver driving with just one hand on the wheel? He loses a point.” Hilariously on the way home, the 3 year old fell asleep and still managed to score three points.

In between we had a very relaxed visit to the Prigel Family Creamery. We first visited this place as part of the Maryland Ice Cream Trail – a list of ten or so dairies in Maryland where you could get ice cream. Visit all ten and get entered to win a prize. That first year we went to seven of them. This dairy is a nice outing because you can get sandwiches and meat and cheese plates, and there are cows – we can go, get lunch, eat it while watching the cows, and then get ice cream. I’m glad that we went because it turns out they are shutting down their sandwich counter and we were there on the last day. We ordered lunch then played some CodeNames – one of our new favorite games- then had ice cream. I had lemon ice cream, the six year old had strawberry (I think my favorite of all the cones), the three year old had cookies and cream and the 11 year old had a vanilla milkshakes with cookie dough chunks. I was a little annoyed when she thew out most of the cookie dough chunks – she said they were too big. I was probably disproportionately irked at her for this, but food waste annoys me and I would have eaten them if she had asked around. Oh well, lesson for next time.

The kids picked rocks from the parking lot to keep our cards from blowing away. I like Code Names because you don’t have to be able to read to play so all the kids can participate.

All in all, some good summer adventures for these last few days. Also not as much life admin as I would like – I still feel very behind. But I guess when we look back on the last weeks of August 2023 I want to remember the time I spent with my friends and family and the food and the sunshine, not the time I spent paying the bills. (Though that is important too.)

Grateful For:
-A full summer of work. I haven’t worked all summer in a very long time, so I’m grateful I got to do that this year.

-Friends. Now that I have my evenings back, we’ve started to make plans and see friends. One day we went to Comet Ping Pong and had pizza and played ping pong. One evening a friend came over for dinner, and she brough dessert and marinated anchovies (the way to my heart!). The past week felt very social, but that certainly fills up one my buckets too.

-Friends who cut hair. The 11 year old needed her hair trimmed – seeing as how she wants to keep it long I just wanted to take a few inches off the bottom so that the ends could stay healthy. I texted my friend and asked if she could do it and she said yes! So we went over for dinner one night and my friend did a bathroom trim. Frugal and friendly! Win!

-Bose wireless speaker. The rear speakers on my car don’t work, which makes it hard for the kids riding in the back to hear whenever I play music/audiobooks. The husband had the idea that I should bring his wireless speaker on our drive to see my friend in Sothern Maryland and it worked really well. We listened to the audiobooks of How To Train Your Dragon – hilarious. Highly recommend.

-Our new lawnmower. The 11 year old ran our lawnmower into a stump in the backyard while mowing and pretty much killed it. The lawnmower, not the stump. The stump was dead already. She feels pretty terrible about it so I am practicing putting on my big girl parenting pants on and not getting angry at her. I mean, truth to tell, the Husband is the yard/garden person so I think he took it harder than I did, but even he was the one who told me not to yell at her. I’m trying to embrace the idea that there will be casualties of raising children (My husband’s favorite snow globe, for instance that got smashed last Christmas by toddler hands), and not flip out any time something gets ruined. Seriously there should be some kind of insurance for parents of children. At any rate, as part of our agreement to buy a new mower rather than hiring a lawncare service, I have agreed to mow the lawn every other time. (I think I used to mow maybe twice a summer) The Husband is letting me get away with not using the trimmer or the blower. I just have to mow. The lawn is tiny. It takes about 45 minutes for me. Anyhow, we got a new mower. It’s battery powered. (Our previous one was gas.) It actually makes mowing not feel like an uphill struggle. It’s so quiet that I’m afraid that I’ll forget that it is actually quite dangerous. Something about the ear splitting noise of our gas mower reminded me every moment that I was one absent minded moment from losing a finger or toe. I wouldn’t say I’m looking forward to mowing now, but I guess with our new mower, it does seem like less of an inconvenience than before.

Looking Forward To:
-Having time back to myself after the kids are in school. I haven’t been exercising – first because the kids have been home and I can’t leave the six year old home by himself, then there was the whole smashed toe incident. I did manage a few yoga sessions, but I haven’t been running.
– A trip to Longwood Gardens. We haven’t been all summer, so we’re going to take a day and go before school starts. I’m looking forward to seeing the fountains and the flowers and the trees and eating the mushroom soup.
-Season Two of the Gilded Age! The trailer just dropped – I love a good soapy costume drama. I binged the first season earlier this year – it was my “watch while I do the dishes” temptation bundle. Second season starts end of October. Knowing me, I probably won’t get around to watching it until next spring – I’m horrible at keeping up with tv shows – but just knowing that there is a second season coming is very exciting for me. And I hear that there will be a dueling opera company rivalry as a plot point. Oooh!

What We Ate:

Saturday: Went out for Mexican food at Guapo’s with my sister in law and her family. I had the ceviche sampler plate. I do love ceviche. This was the last day we saw my sister in law’s family before they went back to the Netherlands (which reminds me – I still have to finish those trip recaps!)

Sunday: Grilled salmon and veggies. I did the veggies (onions, peppers, zucchini) on skewers -which isn’t something I usually do because for some reason I thought they don’t cook as well on skewers, but turns out they turn out great. I might be changing up my grilled veggie game now.

Monday: Comet Ping Pong with friends.

Tuesday: Cold Mapo Tofu, stir fried green beans w/ fired tofu, and cucumber salad, brown rice on the side. There was a great collection of recipes in the Washington Post of no-cook meals and the tofu was one of them. Basically it’s marinated silken tofu. It was very tasty, but I think I would like to use soft tofu next time; I don’t think I’m much of a silken tofu fan.

Wednesday: Snack dinner. Both the Husband and the 11 year old had plans this evening so I took the two little kids to the pool. We had crackers and cheese and fruit and whatever else I could pull from the fridge.

Thursday: Fair food. I had the grilled corn. I think the kids had corn dogs and sausages. There were also fries and funnel cake and lemonade. I’m kicking myself because I threw out my lemonade cup and I should have kept it because refills are definitely cheaper than getting a new one. Oh well, lessons for next time.

Friday: Dinner at my friend’s house in Southern Maryland.

Saturday: Pizza (Husband made) and move night. We watched the first How to Train Your Dragon movie. I thought it was quite good, but very different from the book.

Sunday: impromptu dinner at friend’s house – wings, hotdogs, salad, corn. Perfect casual get together.

Weekly Recap + What We Ate: Tech/Opening/Closing

Another show closed. Well there was only one performance, so it opened and closed on the same night. Someone backstage was wishing people “Happy Clopening!” This was unlike any tech period I’d ever done before. First of all, we had fewer onstage rehearsals than I’m used to, so everything felt rather ambitious and there was no day off before closing so I definitely had to pace myself a little bit. But the biggest adjustment for me is that because it is an outdoor venue, we had all our lighting sessions at night, after the evening rehearsal. It doesn’t do much good to write light cues during the day with bright sunlight everywhere. So for three days, we would rehearse until 11 or 11:30pm, the cast would go home, and then we would have a little break and then come back and light from 12:00 midnight until 2:30am. Go home, sleep, and come back the next afternoon. It’s funny how coming back to work at 2 or 3:00pm can feel just like arriving to work at 10am – the same kind of groggy, anticipatory energy as you walk in the door for the first time, chai in hand.

I guess many outdoor opera companies do this over night tech session, but it was my first time experiencing it. Thankfully the company provided us with food after the evening rehearsal and before the midnight tech session. As the big boss said, “It’s easier to work the third shift with a full belly.” I know some jobs, particularly in the for profit sector, the company providing food, or being able to expense food, is a given, but it’s not that way where I work, so I’m always grateful when we are included in company provided meals.

Anyhow, the show is now closed, farewells have been said and the summer opera season is over or me. On to the next.

Tech week stats-
Average Steps / day, over 4 days of tech: 18, 623
Average flights climbed/day: 23. The set had two levels, rather high ones actually. There was one staircase that took you up 30 feet in the air.

Here is the view from the top:

Some other fun tech week photos:

Paperwork – I did the wardrobe/wigs running paperwork, which requires a lot of time math to figure out how long someone has to change their costume.

The swanky outdoor patio off of the space we used for our office. The hammock was wet for most of the week, so I did not get to relax on it as I wanted. I might have taken a ten minute nap in those chairs at one point, though.

Our pretty pretty set. One night only then into the dumpster. Theatre is so ephemeral.

Our fabulous interns lightwalking at 2am.

The tower opens up to reveal these mirrored walls:

The view of the theatre as you drive up – how lucky to work in such a beautiful space!

Also – on a sartorial note – On Opening Night, I saw several ladies in these really elegant caftans. Now I’m at a stage where “cocktail attire” sounds completely uncomfortable and unpleasant to me. Plus there is no longer anything in my closet that might pass for cocktails attire. And heels… forget about it. So when I saw several ladies so elegant and cool looking in soft billowy caftans, I thought… “Am I old enough – and poised enough — to be able to pull that off?” and now I am contemplating adding a beautiful elegant caftan to my wardrobe that might be opening night worthy. Something like:

or this;

Or this one is fun:

From Nieman Marcus – though definitely on the price-y side for me. But alos I appreciate the non-plunging neckline.

I’d have to figure out the heels situations though…. I feel like 75% of what makes something elegant is wearing heels.

The Husband took the kids out of town for three days to visit family, coinciding with the first few days of tech, which was extremely nice. For the second time this summer, I had the house to myself, though this time I was in the theatre for much of the the time so I didn’t get to indulge in my alone time as much as earlier this summer.

My first evening with an empty house, though I had a long date with a friend. It was blazingly hot so she wandered if we could do something in the air conditioning.

So I suggested ice skating. I had, in fact, just been at the ice rink that morning with the kids for their lesson and the 50 degree arena was refreshing. My friend thought it was a brilliant idea, so we went and spent two hours gliding lazy laps around the rink. Then we went for dumplings at my favorite dumpling house. Since the last time I was there the restaurant has expanded into the space next door to become some kind of karaoke bar, and walking in the hip new interior was a bit of a shock. This is the dumpling house that the Husband used to eat at every Friday for lunch when his office was a few blocks away. We used to come with our teeny tiny babies and there is one waitress who would hold our babies and walk around with them so that we could eat. When my friend and I walked in, the waitress asked me, “Where are the kids?”

“My Husband took them out of town,” I said.

“Vacation for you!” She said.

When she took our order, she said, “We have special vegetables today!” Apparently during the summer she grows vegetables in her back yard and then brings them in to the restaurant for them to cook and serve. She even pulled out her phone to show us pictures of her green green plots of land. It was very impressive. “In the Summer we are Farm to Table too!” she laughed. She was explaining what vegetables she brought in today and said we should try one of the dishes, one of which was a shrimp dish. The translation app translated the name of the vegetable as “loofah”. And indeed it was – it was kind of like a spongy cross between a cucumber and a zucchini. Very tasty. The cucumbers in our cucumber salad were also from her garden and they were the lightest crunchiest cucumbers I had ever tasted.

After dinner we walked over to a dessert place called Kyoto Matcha that I had wanted to try for a while. They have a lot of Matcha based desserts, including a “blanket cake” that looks exactly like it sounds – a swaddle of dessert. I got a Kyoto Cream Roll Cake which had a slightly salty cream filling. My friend go the red bean blanket cake – both were really delicious. We got our cake and sat in the plaza and ate cake and talked about life and such until it got late and then we went home. It was so nice to spend time with my friend, one on one, without the ids around, even though she is always the best with my kids.

Things that made life fun last week or so:
-Getting the Wordle in one! I mean statistically it’s bound to happen since I use the same first word, but still it was pretty fun when all the squares turned green the first go around. Though I have to admit it is not as satisfying as getting it in six or three – three because it makes me feel smart and six because it makes me feel lucky. Now I have to find a new first word. Ironically, the weekend thread on Ask A Manager had a threadjack on Wordle first words – some good options. I liked poser and pinky. Stare seems to be a common one too.

-Before they left for the lake, the two older kids had their Theatre Camp performances. It was a harrowing week for camp because the storm the previous weekend had done a lot of damage to the park where they originally had camp, so they had to change locations. The new location was not as convenient for me, but some of the camps at the park had to cancel so I’m glad our camp was able to relocate. Each child was in a different show and it was so fun to see them up on stage – saying lines, singing, dancing, and having a good time. My favorite moment was when the six year old, playing one of the children in a Pied Piper of Hamlin inspired story had to be a frozen statue – he was such a great frozen statue. The little guy is surprisingly good at standing still and staring off into space. Theatre camp is expensive, but I think the kids get so much out of it, so I’m glad we can afford to send them.

-While waiting for the kids’ camp performance to start, I had enough time to take a very muddy run on a nearby trail, where I met this little guy:

-Just down the road from the new camp location is a produce stand. I stopped by one day because they had peaches and peaches are one of my favorite things about summer. “Do you take credit cards?” I asked the guy at the register.
“We only take cash, check, or IOU,” he replied.
I must have given him a funny look, because he said, “My boss has been here for thirty years every summer and it’s the way he does things. If anyone doesn’t have the money, we let them have what they want and tell them to come by when they have the money.”
“That seems so odd!” I said.
“Yeah, it’s not how people do business these days, but it works for us.”

So he sent me on my way with six peaches, and the next day, I came back with cash and bought another six peaches. So I guess it does work out okay for everyone somehow.

Grateful For: Tech Week Edition:

-Water, ice, and Gatorade and my insulated water bottle. Like I mentioned – we were at an outdoor venue. It was in the high 80s and oh so humid last week. The venue provided us with huge coolers of ice and bottled water as well as water coolers with both ice water and room temperature water. During the performance there was Gatorade as well. I’m not a Gatorade person, but I tell you, at intermission after being on my feet since 6pm, and sweating profusely, I drank a bottle and felt better. I had brought my black blazer to wear because I do believe in wearing long sleeves backstage, especially since the venue was so big that there were large swaths of the audience who could see backstage from where they sat. But I soon gave up on the blazer and just wore it when I was standing close in the wings. I also started googling “Black Linen Blazer”. My insulated Kleen Kanteen also got such a lot of use. So glad I bought a straw lid for it. I was having a conversation with my sister in law who lives in Amsterdam about water and she said, “Oh we don’t drink ice water in Europe; I’t sso American.” And I thought with sad dismay, “But ice water on a hot day is one of the great pleasures in life!” She is missing out, I tell you.

-Fans. There were giant fans everywhere backstage. I definitely adjusted my traffic patterns and took the opportunity to walk by them any chance I got.

-The Husband taking the kids away for a few days. Being at the theatre until 2:30am is a lot more manageable when I don’t have to get up at 7:00am to get the kids to camp/school. I did have to get the youngest one to school on the last two days of tech, but the Husband made sure that they didn’t wake me up too early. There was one morning when a child walked in and said, “It’s 8:00 – why are you still in bed? Are you okay?” then she ran downstairs in a panic to tell the Husband.

-2:30am traffic. Much lighter than 3:00pm traffic. Because the last thing I want to do when getting off work at 2:30am is sit in bumper to bumper traffic. So yeah, I’m glad there are only a few poor souls out of the Capital Beltway in the pre-dawn hours. It did also have me wondering who these 2:30am on the beltway souls were. I’m sure there are many tales to be told there.

-The past three productions of Don Giovanni that I’ve done. This is my fourth production of Don Giovanni. (I think the show I’ve done the most is The Marriage of Figaro – I’ve done six of those – there was a period of life when I did a Figaro every year. Good thing it’s my favorite opera.) Anyhow, every production is different, yet a lot is still the same. A lot of the music, even with cuts, is the same. The reason I’m glad for having done so many Giovannis is that I am very familiar with the music. And the score is very heavy – it’s like four hundred pages or something like that, plus it’s in a binder with all my other show running paperwork. (Some people just keep their scores in a separate binder which makes things lighter, but I like having things all together. I have colleagues who are starting to to work off tablets. I’m not sure I’m ready for that yet.) Normally I carry my score with me around while I’m running the show, periodically parking it on a music stand. (This is actually somewhat controversial. Some people think you should always have your score with you. Some people think you should leave it on the music stand and run around unencumbered. I fall somewhere in between but do tend to carry it around a lot. But over all, I’m a “You do you” kind of person.) With a 400 page score, this gets very tiring. It wasn’t that our production was that busy, but with the heat, I was running water to singers practically every time they came off stage. Juggling five water bottles, a towel for wiping sweat plus a 400 page score was kind of ridiculous. So I just left my score on my music stand for most of the show. And the reason I felt like I could do this was because I had done three previous productions and I knew approximately how much time I had between cues. I didn’t have to have the music with me to know where I was in the show. I knew that the start of this aria meant I had three minutes to get to this wing to cue these singers onstage. I knew that the repeat of the A section of this line meant that that singer had two minutes left in their costume change. I mean even with a new score I have the timings written and and I could figure it out and learn the rhythms, but there is something easier about not having to look it up at all.
So yeah, I’m grateful for those three previous productions of of Giovanni and for being able to run around backstage in the summer heat without having to lug my 400 page score with me.

-And as always, my amazing colleagues who are so good at what they do and who makes me laugh and keep my spirits up even at 2:30am. This job is so much harder when I don’t get along with the people I work with.

Looking Forward To:

-The start of School! There is back to school shopping to do and a few more days to wring out all the summer we can before getting back into the school year routine. I feel like I need to get the kids back on a school sleep schedule. They’ve all been staying up til 9:00p/9:30p even 10pm, and waking up around 7:30pm. Well except the 3 year old who wakes up at 6:30am no matter what time she goes to bed. The oldest will be starting middle school, which starts at 8:15am, so that will also be a big adjustment getting out of the house an hour earlier. She has a practice half day coming up, so we’ll see how that goes. Also – not sure how she she is getting to school. Bus is only provided if you live 1.2 miles from school and we live 1.1 miles. So walk, or maybe bike? It feels a little far to walk, but maybe not. There is one pretty busy road to cross and no stop light, only a cross walk, unless you walk two blocks up or down, which adds about five minutes to the walk. I do worry because we live next to the hospital so there is a lot of traffic on that road. But also I don’t have time to walk with her or drive her myself since I have to get the other kids to school (plus our neighbor’s kids). Maybe the first week, I can walk with her to the busy street and make sure she gets across safely. New year, new challenges!

-Also on that note: getting back to routines. I feel like I’m behind in everything – laundry, house chores, life chores, kids activity sign up. I’m looking forward to having time to think things through.

-Going to visit a friend at her house on the shore.

-Going to the County Fair! Rides! Fried Food! Animals!

– Getting my passport renewed. This is one of those “Looking forward to checking off the to do list” tasks. The Husband was going through our box of documents and said, “Hey your passport is about to expire.”
“No, it isn’t,” I said. “I put a calendar reminder to renew it three months out.”
“Oooookay,” he said.
So I pull it out and looked at it. Friends, it expires NEXT MONTH.
Oops. I thought I had put a calendar reminder to renew my passport this year, but turns out that was a calendar reminder to renew my daughter’s passport. So it must be done and soon. I’m glad I didn’t have any international trips planned. And hope that I won’t have to flee the country any time soon. Also I now need to find one day with perfect hair to have my picture taken.

-Reading this book:

It’s a book that feels quite personal to me and I can’t put it down. All my youthful and middle-age insecurities as an Ivy League student/graduate are right here in every chapter.

What we Ate: We ate pizza multiple times this week, and it’s not even counting the number of times the Husband and kids ate it while visiting his sister. Pizza just seems like the easiest options for these group meals, though I do want to grow my ideas of “food to feed multiple people and kids” beyond the many variations of cheese and carbs (pizza, mac n cheese, grilled cheese sandwiches, quesadillas…) Anyone have any other go-to feeds a crowd with kids ideas?

Monday: Miso Tofu, Broccoli and Udon noodles. There was leftover miso sauce from something the Husband made the week before, so I threw it on tofu, baked it and had broccoli and noodles with it. vegan.

Tuesday: Eggs, The Husband cooked since I was at work.

Wednesday: Pasta and Turkey meatballs. The Husband’s sister was in town and this was an easy meal to throw in the InstantPot. Pasta and sauce cooked separately to accommodate vegetarians. I made a double batch of meatballs and froze them for future me. ( I actually made these for Wednesday, but SIL’s plans changed so I just froze the meatballs and the Husband put them in the IP – I’m so proud of him because he usually avoids the IP…)

Thursday; Pizza take out. We were going to go to the pool, but it got really chilly and rainy so we ordered pizza and ate at home with my Sister In law and her family.

Friday: Pizza and movie night. I think they watched the Lego movie.

Saturday: Dumplings and green beans.

Sunday: Family was gone, and I went to the Dumpling House with my friend.

Monday: Leftovers. Start of single lady eating.

Tuesday – Friday: Made a big pot of mujadara for Tech Week and ate a combination of that and leftovers for the rest of the week. I used this recipe from Feasting at Home.

Weekly recap + what we ate: Dishes

A shady basketball court – on of my grateful things lately.

Welp the dishwasher was broken for much of last week. The last day my brother and his in laws were in town, right after I cooked dinner for 12 people, it decided to not turn on, after the Husband had loaded 12 people’s worth of dishes into it. For a while, we limped along and washed dishes by hand, but eventually we gave up and started eating on paper plates. The Husband had given me a hard time a couple months ago when I bought the Costco sized pack of Chinet for a party. Well, who’s laughing now?

Growing up, we never had a dishwasher. My mother taught me to wash dishes at an early age. I also learned how to wash dishes in Home Ec. Our Home Ec teacher taught us the two sink method – you fill one sink with soapy water, and wash in that sink and then rinse in the other sink. We have only one sink in our kitchen so I fill a bowl with soapy water to wash. The home ec teacher did say that if you only had one sink to fill that sink with soapy water and then rinse under a light trickle of water to prevent diluting the soapy water too much. But we don’t have a sink stopper hence the “fill another bowl” method.

The first time we moved into a house with a dishwasher, I was thirteen. My parents lived in that house for probably twenty years and I don’t think they ever used the dishwasher to wash dishes. They did use it to store dishes, however, so it’s not as if it went completely unused.

Anyhow I think dishwashers are the norm now. I certainly use it to wash the majority of my dishes. Even the week that the family was away and I was all on my own – I still amassed dishes in the dishwasher until there was a full load to run.

But man, this past week or so of being without a dishwasher was tough… A family of 5 generates a lot of dishes, even when we are all out of the house for the majority of the day. Things I realized when we were doing all the dishes by hand:
1) It’s not just about the washing, it’s about the drying too. We don’t have a dish rack, just one of those super absorbent mats on which we put clean, drippy dishes. This was actually a huge disagreement between me and the Husband early in our marriage. He grew up where everything was put in the dishwasher and the counters were kept clear. I grew up without a dishwasher and the dishes just drained in the drying rack on the counter. Anyhow, I couldn’t convince him of the need for a drying rack so we just use drying mats now. Which is fine…. until you have a ga-billion dishes to do all the time and they don’t all fit on the mat. So you have to dry them and put them away so that there is room on the mat for all the other dishes coming down the pipeline. This is partly why it takes so long to get through the dishes. Eventually we realized this and someone always had drying duty during our evening clean up time. I guess I never really understood the phrase, “I wash, you dry” until now. (Although I just had a friend suggest that we should have put the dishes in the non-working dishwasher to dry, clearing off counter space. That’s brilliant. Must remember for next time.)

2) Another dish decision – wash now or wash later? I suppose this is also a decision when the dishwasher is working, but it seems like a bigger decision when hand washing dishes looms in one’s future. Wash everything as I go, after each meal, each snack, each packed lunch? Or let it sit in a pile and do it all in one go? I am definitely a “accumulate and do it all in one go” type of person. But when it’s just one fork or plate, it’s just as easy to put it straight into the dishwasher.

Anyhow, the dishwasher is now fixed, after having one mis-scheduled appointment, for which I sat at home and no one ever arrived….

The other exciting weekend happening was that we lost power for six hours on a Saturday night. A storm came through fast and furious and left huge swaths of the DC area without power. So we decided to go out to eat. The restaurant was bustling and it took a while to get us our food, but we were in no rush to go home and sit in our dark, warm, stuffy house. When we got home, we went for a walk, and I tried to capture the amazing lightning in the sky, though I fail:

That light behind the trees is lightning.

The Sunday after that was such a perfectly chill day. We had waffles in the morning and then spent some time tidying. Then we went to a park for a couple hours, then the two little kids had skating lessons. Then we went grocery shopping and then came home. It was such a nice combination of chores and low key fun stuff None of our adventures were huge or novel – they were familiar and routine. Afterwards, I thought, “If every day could be like today, that would be awesome!”

Other nice things in my life lately:

-Going to the opera and going to the theatre. I went to watch a rehearsal of the other opera that my current company is putting on. It was a beautiful production with some really wonderful performances. How awesome it is to just walk into the building next door and see an opera!
Then a couple days later, the Husband and 11 year old and I went to see The Play That Goes Wrong. The premise is that a group of people are putting on a play and onstage mishaps just keep happening – people keep missing lines, props are misplaced, the doors don’t work, the set falls apart…. I’ve written in the past about onstage mishaps that I’ve experienced… well this was two hours of onstage mishaps. It was side splittingly funny. I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard in the theatre. Part of the fun for me was that there was a Stage Manager character and his booth was actually in the house and seeing him do his job (or sometimes screw up his job) was was both nail biting and hilarious. I know some people go to the theatre expecting to be moved to devastation, and that’s what makes it a worthwhile experience, but I think we undersell how powerful joy and laughter can be in a theatre too.

That’s the “stage manger’s booth” on the left.

-One day, I had the afternoon off from work, so I picked up the three year old from school early, and took her to the pool. The pool was pretty empty at 1pm on a weekday afternoon; I think there was only one or two other families there. It was one of the days that was in the mid-nineties, so pool time, broken up by lots of snacks, was such a great way to spend a few hours. Having one on one time with the three year old was pretty great too. I’ve been feeling bad that she goes to day care while I have adventures with the other two kids, and I think she was feeling a little left out too.

Mommy daughter date – pool snacks and swimming on a 90 degree day.

-One day, I treated myself to a boba tea. My usual order of black tea, 25% sweetness (I usually get no sweetness, but this place didn’t have the option), with both boba and lychee jelly. Well, to my delight, the lychee jelly was shaped like stars. That little bit of whimsy really made my day.

– Discovering that there is a stylus on my computer and I can use it to draw on groundplans! My laptop can flip to be used as a tablet, which I knew. I did not know that there was a stylus tucked into the computer as well. I was poking around on the laptop one day, trying to figure out why I didn’t have any internet connection and I discovered a stylus tucked into the bottom.
This was a real game changer for me. One of my jobs is to make “minis” for our books. A mini is a small version of the set’s groundplan, where we write down staging notes. Often time (these days), I get a PDF version of the groundplan, but it usually has all sorts of writing and extraneous lines on it – like measurements and dimensions of various parts of the set, or indicators of where things are hung overhead. So I usually take a PDF snapshot capture of the groundplan and plop it into Paint and edit it there, erasing lines, adding lines, etc. . I am sure there are better ways to do this, but this is how I learned to clean up a mini. And I do all this manipulation on the computer with my mouse. Which can be frustratingly imprecise and tedious.
Well, the stylus has made this process as easy as drawing and erasing with a pencil – this last show, making the minis was so much easier.

A peek at my work life. It’s a round tower with stairs going around it and a table in the middle.

Now that I look at it, the groundplans kind of remind me of those pictures of “cowboys making eggs.”:

Grateful For:
– Dishwashing gloves. When I was younger, my mother always made me wear dishwashing gloves when I did the dishes. I thought they were cumbersome and silly so I once I was out of the house, I didn’t bother to wear them anymore. But then I got eczema on my hands and the dermatologist’s number one recommendation? To stop doing the dishes. His other recommendation was to get a platinum wedding ring. Well neither of those were going to happen. So I started wearing gloves to wash dishes and my hands stopped getting so chapped. Mom was right.
-Shady paths on which to run. Last week was so so so hot. Consistently in the 90s and humid too. The air was thick, the sun was bright. I am so grateful that there are several options for me to run on tree lined paths.
-Shady basketball courts. I’m glad that our local basketball court is surrounded by tall trees, so that it stays shady until at least noon. We’ve gone to shoot hoops early in the morning a few times to beat the heat, but being in the shade also makes it more enjoyable.
– The privilege of knowing some good people. I have two new-ish friends who are moving. One is moving overseas – her husband is in the foreign service. The other friend is moving across the country for work. I’m sad they are leaving because I don’t always find it easy to make friends and these two people were just souls I clicked with right away. One of them, I met at the school bus stop and our casual “Good morning!” over the school year became long walks and coffee and just standing at the bus stop chatting long after the bus had borne our kids off. I just feel so lucky to have been able to connect.
– A new to us bike. The friend who is moving across the country actually gave us her son’s bike as they couldn’t take it with them. Our six year old is finally learning to ride a bike with lots of help from every one!

Looking Forward To:
– More visits from family. My sister in law is in town. They have gone off to the western part of the state for a couple days and then will be back, so I will look forward to them
-Running. I don’t particularly like running – I find it hard and often tedious. I’m slow. It takes a lot of effort. It makes me hot and sweaty. But I do recognize that I feel better physically and more alert mentally when I do get a run in, so I make and effort to fit a run in when I can, often at work. This week, though, I noticed something – as I was packing my running shoes and running clothes into my tote bag to take to work, I was struck with a feeling of excitement. I wasn’t excited to do the actual running, but I was really happy that I could look forward to having the time to run and be outside. I don’t know if that makes sense or not. Just the simple act of packing my running stuff to take to work made the day seem like it was going to be okay – I could start the day hopeful that I could do something good for myself at some point.
– Tech! This week is tech. It’s always exciting and exhausting, taking a show from the rehearsal hall to the stage.

What We Ate : I think I’m behind in writing down our dinner – so here’s two weeks’ worth:

Monday: Fish taco, made by Husband

Tuesday: Sandwiches from The Sandwich Shop before the opera. They had a broccoli rabe and sun-dried tomato sandwich that was divine!

Wednesday: Pasta and Meatballs.

Thursday: Grilled Cheese and dumplings. Fast thrown together meal as we were trying to get to basketball.

Friday: My mom make three cup chicken and rice. A Taiwanese dish that is sooo tasty. Eaten in the theatre lobby before the show.

Saturday: Pizza and The Sandlot. A lovely lovely movie.

Sunday: Chinese food – a new to us place that we wanted to try out. The food was very very spicy. The Husband made milkshakes at home afterwards.

Monday: Zucchini tart and green salad. I always forget how easy a vegetable tart is when you have puff pastry in the freezer.

Tuesday: Greek Chicken and Cabbage Slaw. The Husband made this. I wish I had the recipe because it was really good.

Wednesday: Sauteed tofu and green beans.

Thursday: Lemon and brown rice chicken soup from Grains for Every Season. Really tasty and made for good leftover.

Friday: Pizza and Brooklyn 99. We had friends over and were going to watch Parent Trap but the kids were too busy playing so the grown ups watched six episodes of Brooklyn 99 instead. It’s a great show.

Saturday: The day the power went out.

Sunday: Zucchini Orzo – recipe from New York Times. Meh. The flavors were good, but it was mushy. I always like the idea of orzo, but the reality is always just disapointing.

Weekly recap + what I ate: solo week and opening night!

I opened another show last week. Yay. The opening night show was not flawless – there was a curtain that had to be hung at intermission and we just couldn’t get it to line up as it should so we had to take it down and re-hang it three times and intermission ran long while we did this. The audience loved that, however. They came back from intermission to see us trying to fix the issue and as intermission stretched one, two, three, four.. minutes beyond expected, there was a palpable tension in the air. Every time we tried to close the curtain, I could feel the audience hold their breath, and when it didn’t work, there was a large groan of disappointment. And then when we finally got the curtain hung correctly, there was a huge burst of applause!

Prop Table ready for the start of the show! I tired something new and taped the prop list to the wall above the table. and it seemed to work well.

Tech Week: Tech week itself went fairly smoothly. I was not great about going to bed right as soon as I got home because I found that when I got home I still was faced with a stack of dirty dishes and enticing books and inviting snacks. On the other hand, I did get to sleep in (by which I mean 8:30am) in the morning since I didn’t have to be up with the kids, so sleep-wise things weren’t so bad.

Tech steps average: 14, 490 steps/ day.

Annapolis: A good friend of mine was passing through town on the Monday Juneteenth holiday so I picked her up from the train station and we decided to spend the day exploring Annapolis. I had only been to Annapolis once or twice for the boat show, and it had been many many years, so I was happy for the opportunity to visit again. One of hiking books featured a walk around historic Annapolis, so we decided to do that. Our trip to Annapolis started off with the elation of free parking. I completely understand how parking is dicatated by so much more than my need for a place to put my car, but it still irks me to have to pay for it. But since we only had a couple hours in Annapolis, I decided to put the car in a garage and just pay for parking. And then on the way to pay, I saw this sign:

Scoring free parking always makes me feel like that day is going well. (And I know I’m probably upsetting some balance of economics and city planning, but…) First stop – we had lunch and then visited a hat store.

I had lost my sunhat last year and was looking for a new one. I particularly wanted one with a large brim and which I could pack. This hat store had some veeerry fancy hats- there was a cream and navy striped hat that I loved, but for the price, I couldn’t bring myself to buy a hat that would show dirt and couldn’t be tossed in the washing machine. I decided upon a red hat- my favorite colour!

We then took this walking tour from my hiking book – Best Day Hikes Near Washington, DC. Now a city stroll isn’t what I would typically categorize as a hike, but why not? The walking tour first took us by the Maryland State House – the oldest state house still in use in the U.S. In front of the State House was a statue of Thurgood Marshall, whom I didn’t realize was from Maryland. It was such an odd juxtaposition to see the construction cranes against the colonial architecture of the State House. I didn’t grow up in Maryland and it struck me that my kids will probably learn about Maryland state history and know more about this state than I do. I hear that a visit to the State House is something almost every middle schooler will do.

Thurgood Marshall statue. Also – that dome on top of the state house is the oldest wooden dome in the country.

The walking tour next took us through St. Johns University where we discovered a small art museum, the Mitchell Art Museum. The current exhibition was of African American art from the collection of Alitash Kebede, an art collector based in Los Angeles. It was a varied and thoughtful exhibit and one of the highlights of our walk. How wonderfully serendipitous to just stumble across this museum, and it also made for a nice break from the heat.

We continued on and saw historic row houses:

I can’t resist a good boot scraper. I love such period details that survive through the years:

More 18th century buildings:

Mural:

The walking tour ended up at City Dock where we could see boats sailing to and fro across the Chesapeake Bay. We ended up at a coffeeshop on the dock, Bitty and Beau’s, which was recommended by a friend. I don’t drink coffee, but I’m always happy to pick up beans for the Husband:

Each bag of coffee came with a postcard with a handwritten note on the back. Bitty and Beau’s was started by a couple who wanted to provide employment opportunities for people with intellectual and developmental disabilities.

And then we stopped for ice cream, where I saw this sign:

And then it was time to take my friend to meet up with her family and I headed home. All in all, a very nice day trip. We didn’t even get to the Naval Academy or the Maritime Museum, but I’m looking forward to being back.

The solo week. While the Husband and children were off in Chicago, I was at home trying to wrap my head around how different (yet in certain parts the same) life was like without the Husband or kids.

There were moments like me eating watermelon at 11pm at night because I cut up too much and now the tupperware lid won’t close and now I remember why we never buy watermelon – because it is such a hassle to put into the fridge. A whole watermelon is for sure not a single person endeavor.

There was laying my yoga mat out at the beginning of the week, and leaving it out all week.

There was getting to read while eating, even though it’s something I tell the kids not to do. (I’m re-thinking this now… maybe we can have books at the table for weekend lunches? Reading while eating feels like such an indulgent action, in that it revels in the solitary and almost meditative aspect of a meal rather than the social.)

Lunch on my own: pan fried tempeh, roasted zucchini with chimichurri on a bagel, salted mango salad and a Bronte biography.

There was cleaning out the fridge and reclaiming a dishwasher full of Tupperware from whatever horrific fuzzy former food matter I had stuffed in there an unspeakable number of months ago. I am a leftover food optimist. It doesn’t always work out well.

There was me spooking myself out being all alone at home and not wanting to go into the basement at night. One night I got home from work and I thought I’d just throw in a load of laundry, but then paused at the top of the stairs to the basement, hyper-aware of all the creaks and groans of a house at midnight. Or maybe, my over active imagination said, the creaks and groans of a serial killer hiding among the overflow Tupperware bin. And then I decided to just leave the laundry for the next morning. (Fun fact -when I was growing up, I was convinced that D.B. Cooper – you know that guy who jumped from a plane somewhere over the Rockies in the 70s with a butt load of money and was never seen again – was living in our basement and refused to go down there by myself at night. Of course I never told my parents that was why. I just made up excuses. But then I told my brother and he was merciless and teased me about it all. the. time. Older brother. They can really suck.)

There was going through all the kids’ drawers and organizing their clothes – taming the unorganized explosion of clothes, the lack of specificity in storage. Hooray – now there is a place of underwear, a place for t-shirts, a place for shorts, etc. I’m hopeful that the clothes stay organized, but I don’t know that I’m holding out much hope. The children don’t seem to value having each of their drawers/bins designated for specific clothing types the way that I do. Will this appreciation for sartorial organization come with age?

There was further development in kids’ clothing – I went through all the clothes piled in the guest room and packed clothes away in labelled bins for future use. Even though I’m normally a clothes hoarder, this time I was pretty ruthless about not keeping clothes that I had no interest in putting on my kids. The cute button down shirts. The corduroy pants with buttons and zippers. The pants with drawstrings to keep them up. Love the idea, can’t imagine wanting to spend the time putting my kids in them. Or my kids having the ability to hold their pee while they try to get those pants off. Anything slightly stained, I threw out. This was a big step for my “Oh but they could use them for play clothes” inner voice. “Or for painting their bedroom.” I firmly told that inner voice that 1) all clothes are play clothes, no need to keep dingy and stained clothes just for this, and 2) Seriously? In what world are my kids ever going to be painting their bedroom. Disappointingly, the house does not look more uncluttered for all my work culling a decade of kids’ clothes. I think because these clothes are usually stuffed in closets or behind closed doors, I wouldn’t have seem them anyway and thus did not clock the clothes as a mess. The mess at times is more an emotional burden than a spatial one. Though in the case of the guest room, it certainly is the latter. The clothes are organized, but my house is nowhere near being closer to whatever Pinterest/shelter magazine/influencer minimalism that seems the ideal.

Seven bins of clothes ready to go into the attic until the next child needs them.

There was the night where at 9pm I decided I wanted to bake, so I stayed up and made soy sauce brownies and black sesame banana bread from Hetty McKinnon’s cookbook To Asia With Love.

There was taking myself to a community festival – the One Journey Festival that celebrated refugees and their stories and contributions. I bought Turkish towels from a vendor, enjoyed African food from a food truck, and sat and listened to musicians from Africa and Afghanistan perform. The Festival was on the grounds of the Washington National Cathedral. I think I visited the grounds once before when I first came to DC almost twenty years ago. Between musical acts, I strolled the gardens and there was a wooded trail nearby, though it was a little too buggy for me to to linger.

It was interesting going to a festival on my own – this is the kind of thing that I usually bring the kids to, and I would encourage them to take part in the community art project and to dance to the live band. I really shouldn’t use my kids as a reason to take part in these things, yet somehow, going on my own, I felt a little self conscious about participating. It was a silly hang up, really. Art and dancing – expressions of creativity and exuberance – aren’t just for children. I felt a little jealous of the adults that I saw who participated whole-heartedly and didn’t just sit and watch.

All in all, a full week. Curiously, I didn’t feel like I had a lot more free time than when the kids were home. Freedom, yes, but not time. Half way through the week, I realized that I so far had done a load of laundry every. single. day. The kids were gone but I was still doing daily laundry. And it was their laundry. What the what?!? The house still had to be picked up, I still had to make and eat food, I still had to go to work.

And then I realized… when the Husband is home, I have someone who splits the housework – actually someone who probably in fairness does more of the housework than I do. I think it’s a testament to how much he does that when he was gone, I didn’t feel like I gained that much time. I did sleep more – like 6-7 hours rather than 5 hours. I could do 30 mins of yoga in the morning rather than 10- which is fine; any yoga practice longer than that and I get restless. And I did read more. The mornings did feel more luxurious without a bus to catch or three lunches to pack.

But the bonus projects I took on that took more time- going through the kids’ clothes in the guest room, the One Journey festival, dinner with a friend, baking- these are things I could have done, or would have done and often do, with the kids. And the things I didn’t get done – mostly life admin things, but also blogging – these things are things I struggled to fit in regardless. Which all in all made me think that really my struggle with these tasks is not about time but about managing priorities and life inertia. Not to say one thing is more important than the other – well, maybe paying the bills is more important than finishing that book – but rather the tasks that require me to sit down at a computer and just crank things out are less appealing when I have a juicy novel in front of me. I do like writing, but actually turning on the computer always seems to take so much more effort to me than just picking up my book (or, let’s be honest, scrolling.) Knocking out a to do list requires more motivation than just kid free time I’m discovering.

I think the other place where I found space during my solo week was mentally. I didn’t quite realize how much mental space living with other people takes until I didn’t have to constantly be thinking about what the other people in my life needed on an every day level. I didn’t have to do the calculus of “do the dishes now” vs. “do the dishes later” because no one was coming to use the kitchen after me so I could just “do the dishes later” without even thinking about it. I didn’t have to think, “What will they want to eat?” or “Is someone going to be annoyed if I leave this tote bag there?” or “Do I need to intervene?” or “Do I have to pick them up or can someone else?” or “Is it worth the temper tantrum to insist on that?” or “Should I read my book or read to my kid?” When the only one who cares about what I do is myself, it feels like decisions are easier.

Mini Rant of the Week: Shorts for kids. I had to grab the 11 year old some shorts before she left on this trip. So I went to the Mall, thinking I’d just stop by JC Penny and grab some shorts. I will say that had some really great leggings marked down to $5, so I grabbed a pair of those. But the shorts.. man. Everything I could find in the Girls’ section was itty bitty short. Like in danger of flashing underwear short. “Okay,” I thought, “I’ll just buy her shorts from the Boys’ Department.” Which I do often because sometimes the boys’ stuff is sturdier and the pockets are just better. But everything in the boys’ section was these polyester athletic shorts with like a 10″ inseam. Is there no such thing as a nice 5″ inseam anymore? Or maybe this is a JCP specific issue? I didn’t really have time to go to all the stores, so I bought the boys athletic shorts, a pair of leggings and a couple shorts from the ladies section for the 11 year old to try. But the lack of what I would deem is a regular inseam length for shorts… baffles me.

(Also – when do I stop shopping in the girls’ section. What is after that and before Women’s? I do shop in the women’s for the 11 year old once in a while- the XS fits her okay.)

(Also – I bought new water bottles and socks for the kids in anticipation of summer camp because the current supply of both water bottles and socks, is mismatched and grimy. And wow… do the kids never stop needing things to be replaced/replenishes/restocked? Always something.)

Thing of Beauty of the Week: I packed both the little kids in one suitcase. Since we weren’t sure if there would be laundry, I packed seven outfits for each kid. The Husband must have been impressed because he sent me a picture of the suitcase upon arrival:

Listening to:
The 2022 podcast Sold A Story: How Teaching Kids to Read Went So Wrong, details the story of reading instruction in the U.S. and how one of the predominant methods currently being used is scientifically proven to be flawed yet still is implemented. I learned to read at an early age and took for granted the ability to look at letters on a page and sound them out. The 11 year old was not an early reader, and actually a little behind her peers. I remember when she was in kindergarten thinking, “Wow there are certainly a lot of strategies being taught on how to figure out what a word is.” But it turns out, according to Sold a Story, that a lot of these strategies, mostly revolving around context clues, don’t actually teach a kid to read. In fact, they are what kids rely on when they can’t read. Listening to this podcast was kind of eye-opening to me – it really made the things that bothered me about the 11 year old’s reading journey make sense. The six year old more or less is figuring out on his own how to read, and I am pretty sure it isn’t through context clues. I’m really interested to see how the baby learns, and after listening to this podcast, I feel like I know how I would prefer to support her. This podcast was fascinating.

Also this On Being episode with Vivek Murthy about the need for love and compassion and connection in our world. So many wise thoughts. My favorite quote:
“When we come into this world — as I see with my own kids, and many of you may have seen with other young people in your lives — we are content. My kids don’t care whether we have a big house or a small house. They don’t care about how fancy the clothes are that they wear or not. They care about finding moments of joy. They care about the relationships they have with the people around them.”
Another thing that stuck with me was how Murthy talks about the pandemic of loneliness – something that was indeed magnified by the pandemic. He offers four suggestions on how individuals can create a world with more connection:
1) spend 15 minutes a day connecting with someone you care about (who doesn’t live with you.)
2) give people your full attention when talking to each other.
3) find opportunities for service as this helps connect you with other people but also with your own values.
4) counterintuitively, find time for solitude because in solitude you can rediscover yourself, and connecting with yourself is important for connecting with other people.
I don’t care to put myself on the introvert/extrovert spectrum because I feel like for me, it’s not one or the other, but I do know that I get deep satisfaction from interacting with other people. I’m always hesitant to reach out to other people, but I’m always glad when I do and this podcast episode was a good reminder to reach out more.

Grateful For:
– The Husband for taking the kids away. A ten hour road trip with three kids… not for the faint of heart, but he went and he made sure the kids had a great time. They went to the Aquarium, did the architectural boat tour, visited the Bean. Also, he sent me this hilarious text exchange:

“Why Thank you, Husband, for sparing me a trip to the American Girl Store!”

– The Husband’s Garden. Since the Husband wasn’t home, I mowed the lawn and watered the garden. I will fully admit that I am a spectator in the backyard – I don’t have any interest in getting my hands into gardening or landscaping or what not. My interaction with the garden is pretty much limited to cooking the vegetables that he grows. As I was watering the garden, though, I noticed how thoughtful he is about the plants, and all the little projects that he has going on in his garden. I noticed how colourful and pretty everything looked and I felt really grateful that he put in the effort to make our backyard so green. And I’m also really grateful that these little bits of dirt and growth have given him a hobby and so many hours of not thinking about the kids.

– Our dishwasher. Because when you clean out the fridge, it is a good thing to not have to wash all that science experiment encrusted Tupperware by hand.

Looking Forward To:
– Camping! And Camp Food! I’ve started brainstorming what we’re going to eat on our camping trip to the Shenandoah Mountains. I’ve bought a new cooler and I’m excited to take it camping. I’ve been listening to camping podcasts to also get me excited about three nights in the woods with two little kids.
– A week at home with the six year old. When I realized that this would be a performance week and I would have a lighter work schedule, I decided not to put the six year old in camp and instead he can have Camp Mom – where we go do fun things and go on playdates and spend lots of time outdoors. His sisters will be in school, so we’ll have lots of one on one time, which si something I don’t do enough of.
-The Smithsonian Folklife Festival – starts this weekend. It’s always fun to go down to the Mall and see the exhibits and performances. The theme this year is the Ozarks and also the exploration of the where spirituality and creativity intersect. I used to dismiss this as one of those DC things that made the Mall a crowded madhouse and I’d avoid going, but I’ve come to see what a neat collection of experiences it is. If I ever have the summer free, I would seriously think about volunteering for the Festival.

What I Ate:
Saturday: The leftover Cucumber and Black Bean Salad from last week.

Sunday: I didn’t plan my work day and meals well and as a result did not pack a dinner and was starving by the time I got home from work at 8:30pm. I ate a can of tuna over some cut up cucumbers with hot sauce. And some more leftovers. Sometimes a can of tuna is just the meal I need.

Monday: Whole Roasted Cauliflower and Mashed Beans from Hetty McKinnon’s To Asia with Love. I’ve always wanted to try a whole roasted cauliflower and being home by myself was the perfect time to do it. The family things cauliflower is bland and make faces whenever I propose it. (And then eat it anyway.) The recipe calls for mixing gochujang and yogurt and spreading that over a cauliflower and then roasting it. The roasting turns the yogurt and gochujang into an almost cheesy like spicy layer coating the cauliflower. It was definitely not bland.

Tuesday and Wednesday: Leftovers. Because when home by myself, it’s okay to eat the same thing three nights in a row. (Maybe it would be okay to do this when everyone else is home too, but I feel like it wouldn’t go over as well. We are so spoiled.)

Thursday: Happy Hour with some mom friends. We went to a favorite Mexican restaurant. I ordered the seafood soup, which I always order at the restaurant. It’s this delicious tomato broth based concoction chock full of seafood and flavour. It is delicious. I had it years ago and even though it is no longer on the menu, they will still make it if you ask. (I feel like such a braggy special snowflake for saying, “I just ask for this off menu thing and they make it.” But that’s really how it goes down.). Anyhow, when I got the bill, I realized that the seafood soup is a $38 item. Which I had never realized before because the Husband usually settles the bill when we go out. And I almost had a heart attack to realize that I’ve been eating $38 soup for years. I mean it is kind of understandable – there is half a lobster in this soup. Plus all sorts of other seafood. I told myself that I don’t drink, so ordering the seafood soup is probably an acceptable indulgence when we go out to eat.

Friday: Opening night – I didn’t really have dinner, but I did have some roast beef sliders and these really complicated looking cucumber appetizers at the opening night party.

Weekly recap + what we ate: School’s Out!

I guess summer has begun!

The 11 year old had her 5th Grade Promotion Ceremony. The Husband and I both went. Oh my goodness. There might have been some tears. You know, those happy tears of, “Wasn’t she just a little baby? and I can’t believe that she’s made it all the way through elementary school! and She’s growing up and moving forward and I can’t always be there for her!” You know, that kind of stuff. Man, if I’m this blubbering mess at her elementary school promotion ceremony, I can’t imagine what kind of mess I’ll be as she gets older. I can’t believe that I will have at least two more Promotion/Graduation ceremonies to go though for this kid. More, if she finished college. And I’ll also have to go through this with the two other kids.

There were so many nice touches to the ceremony. The Principal reminding the students to “Find your superpower and always always always remember to be kind.” And then reminding them that they will always be a Sea Turtle (the school mascot). (okay – I might be tearing up remembering that bit.) As each student’s name was read out, the teacher also read a quote by the student – things like favorite memories, advice, hopes for the world. Some of my favorites:
“The world would be a more awesome place if there were more male teachers.”
“My advice for kindergarteners would be to enjoy recess because you don’t have it in middle school.”
“I will always remember to dial in”

There were also a lot of kids who mentioned their friends and teachers in their quote. It made me realize that even though learning is important, what really makes an impact are the friendship and human connections that the kids make – the people who make a child feel seen and heard. I feel like the 11 year old was fortunately place in the pandemic timeline – she had three years of in person learning before the pandemic and then she had a year and a half of in person learning afterwards. While the year of virtual learning was certainly disruptive, she could start and end elementary school surrounded by people and not online.

At the end of the ceremony, the school has a “clap out” where all the other grades line the hallways and the 5th graders walk by every classroom and high five all the other students. And it ended with cake. Then lots of pictures and good-byes and some phone numbers exchanged for future playdates.

That was the big event for the week.

Well, actually only one kid went to school on the Last Day of School. The 11 year old stayed home – the principal said that no one expected fifth graders to show up on the last half day. And the 3 year old had the day off for teachers in service. She actually is quite confused as to why she still has to go to school/ daycare this summer while her siblings don’t. The six year old went to his last day of kindergarten. Whew. We made it.

Other fun things:

This snapshot of life moment: The two younger kids were playing together, while I wrapped a few things up before I took them to a pool. Then I hear the 6 year old say to the 3 year old , “You need a stick! Go get a stick!” And the three year old runs into the kitchen and grabs a chopstick. Now whenever my kids grab sticks, some spidey sense tells me to be a little wary.
“What do you need a stick for?” I asked.
“To wave it!”
I follow them to the living room, and this is what I saw:

The three year old “conducting” while the six year old “plays”. It delighted me to my music loving heart!

For Better of For Worse:

I found this battered copy of a For Better or For Worse volume in a Little Free Library and immediately snatched it up. I grew up reading Lynn Johnston’s comic strip For Better or For Worse in my local newspaper. The family structure was very similar to my own – mom, dad, older brother, younger sister. And the younger sister was about my age as the strip progressed. I always found it so relatable – just an ordinary family and the gentle ironies of life. Johnston has such a gift for seeing the humour in the mundane. There are certain strips that have always stuck in my head. The one where the mother responds to the father’s complaint of the kids dog-earing books, by saying, “At last they are reading!” has always stayed with me.

The 11 year old has also been reading this slim volume and one day she showed me the page where pre-teen Elizabeth is in a prickly foul mood, slamming doors and growling at her parents, but then at the end of the day asks her mom for a hug. “Sometimes,” the 11 year old says to me, “That’s how I feel.” I just wanted to give her all the hugs.

This yummy breakfast: One day the kids wanted oatmeal for breakfast, which isn’t something we have a lot in the summer. They had frozen blueberries and maple syrup on theirs. I wanted a savory version, so I had eggs, ume plum vinegar, sesame oil, cilantro, and chili bamboo shoots on mine. Kind of like congee. I love chili bamboo shoots; I could eat them right out of the jar. But it’s one of those foods that I always forget that I like so I don’t have it too often. On the side, mango with tajin.

Lychees – I went to HMart for groceries the other day, and when I came home I realized that I have three versions of lychees:

There is my favorite Japanese gummy candy, then canned lychee because there is a lychee ice cream recipe that I want to try to make, and then fresh lychee, which we very rarely get, so I always buy some if I see them and they look good. I guess lychees are my favorite fruit! They are so sweet and juicy and have a nice chew to them that it’s just a really perfect eating experience for me. I’m sure the rarity makes them even more special too. They actually had lychees at Costco last week, but those aren’t as sweet at the ones from HMart.

Grateful for:
– My health. I’ve met a lot of people these past few weeks who are dealing with chronic health conditions, and I’ve been feeling really grateful that thanks mainly to genetics and good luck, I’ve always felt very good in my body. It’s also made me realize that medicine is not an exact science – my friends have gone through a battery of tests and visited many doctors and basically get a diagnosis of “Yup, you feel tired/have migraines/inexplicably vomit…” How mentally exhausting that must be, on top of not feeling physically well! I don’t want to come across a smug, but I’m realizing that I can’t take my ability to function without pain or discomfort for granted, especially as I get older. Health issues can be so mysterious and I could very well develop a chronic issue at anytime, so I’m grateful for every day that I’m healthy.

– The 11 year old’s elementary school and especially the staff and teacher. I had so many doubts about having the 11 year old switch schools for 5th grade. Clearly the partial Immersion program that she was in was not serving her well, but was a new school really the answer? What if she didn’t like the school? What if the kids at the new school were just as mean as the kids at the old school? Is it too big of an adjustment to make for the last year of elementary school? But it was absolutely the right decision, and honestly, one that we should have made sooner. The principal runs the school with the authoritative air of a benevolent ruler – a firm and kind man. The office staff is always happy to see people come in; they never act as if you’re being a bother. And the teachers all want to help kids learn and do well. This is our fourth elementary school experience and I’ll say that I didn’t find these things everywhere. The 11 year old found her spot and friends and one fun thing at the promotion ceremony was meeting all the people whom she connected with over the school year.

-The nice weather and the air clearing up. Luckily we only had about two days of really bad air here in the DC area, but then things were back to normal. With this week being tech week, I’m in the theatre at lot, and I haven’t been getting out to run. But I’m grateful that when I do get breaks, there is balmy weather- not quite grossly humid – and sunshine and shade and lush summer green for me to enjoy.

Looking Forward To: So the Husband has taken all three kids on trip. I’ve had to stay home because I’m working this week. It seems so luxurious to have the whole house to myself. These are things I’m looking forward to
– Reading! I went to the library last week on my day off and got a whole stack of books. I’m inspired by Coco who has been spending hours reading in the morning while her family is away!

– Cooking! I am going to cook and eat all the things that I don’t often get to cook when the family is at home – cauliflower, bok choy, fried rice, lots of vegetables. Tempeh. This is a big one. I’ve had tempeh in the fridge for longer than I care to admit, but no one likes tempeh. That’s not true, quite – no one likes the idea of tempeh, so I never make it. (They’re fine when I do finally make it but sometimes it’s not worth listening to the grousing). Also all the things that I want to eat, but the kids eat before I get to it. Like lychees.

– Cleaning out the guest room. This is my big “To Do” item while home by myself. We have family coming to visit in July and currently the guest room is clothes storage. I need to organize and put the clothes in bins and then put the clothes in the attic.

-Blog – finish my Amsterdam recaps.

-And then also all the other life admin stuff – camp forms, pay the bills, etc. I know this doesn’t really go on a “Looking forward to” list… but I’m looking forward to doing it without having a kid come up and interrupt me.

What We Ate – I still feel like every night I’ve had some variation of this conversation with the Husband:
Him: What can I make for dinner?
Me: Well there’s x, y, and z in the fridge.
Him: What can I do with that?
Me: … spits ball some complicated ideas.
Him: We’ll just have eggs.

In truth, he’s doing a great job of keeping the kids fed as I work into the evening. But I look forward to being able to meal plan again some day:

Saturday: Pizza and movie night – School of Rock.

Sunday: Camp food with friends. Our friends had bought a new camp stove and wanted to try it out, so we went on a hike and then they made dinner at the end. Rice and Beans with Sausage and vegetables – they had dehydrated okra and tomatoes and added that. It was really tasty. There was mac and cheese and broccoli rice for the kids.

Monday: Pork chops with gravy and green beans. The Husband cooked. This is the kind of Midwestern meal he makes without a receipe.

Tuesday: Zucchini Boats – the Husband cooked. We seem to eat these a lot, but it’s a good way to get vegetables into the kids.

Wednesday: Breakfast sandwiches.

Thursday: Turkey Chili – I made before heading off to work. This was one of those really satisfying meals to make in that I got to use up lots of leftovers and clean out the fridge a little. I used the leftover zucchini boat filling (ground turkey) and tossed it in in Instant Pot with leftover turkey burgers, a can of crushed tomatoes, celery, carrots, onions, corn, black beans and chili powder and cumin. It was really tasty and I had the leftovers in wraps for lunch all week.

Friday: Sandwiches at the Golf Course. The Summer music series has started at the local golf course – so many a Fridays we just grab sandwiches from the deli and head there with our lawn chairs and picnic blankets. Even when we don’t plan to go with friends, we almost always run into someone we know.

Saturday: Pizza and movie night. It was my turn to choose and I chose The Queen of Katwe, a 2016 movie based on the true story of a chess prodigy living in the slums of Kampala, Uganda. I’m trying to find more family movies that aren’t animated and I really enjoyed this one. The story is by turns inspirational and dramatic and eye-opening.

Monday: Turkey Chili leftovers

Tuesday: Grilled Tofu and Tomatoes – the husband made this from the Green Barbeque Cookbook, a book of vegan and vegetarian recipes to make on the grill. It was very tasty. Vegan.

Wednesday: Eggs and Green Beans. The Husband cooked.

Thursday: Cucumber and Black Bean Noodle Salad from To Asia With Love by Hetty McKinnon. This was really tasty and went over pretty well with the kids, though one kid only at the veggies and one kid only ate the noodles. The dressing base is fermented black bean sauce, one of my favorite ingredients. I added green beans and five spice tofu to bulk it up. Vegan.

Friday: Leftovers for me. Not quite sure what the Husband and kids did.

(bi)Weekly Recap + what we ate: Opening Night and other Miscellaneous things

Another show opened. Woot! Some random thoughts from this month so far:

A few of my tech week MVPs:
– pre-planning my wardrobe and laying out a week’s worth of clothes on Sunday night. I had done this on my Fall show, but had fallen out of the habit the past two shows. I need to remember to do this more often – not having to spend time thinking about what I’m going to wear every morning makes getting dressed go much faster. For some reason, when I have to decide anew every morning what to wear, it takes more time to choose than when I do it on Sunday night.
– Yogurt. I’ve been trying to run or walk on my dinner breaks – I didn’t do as many runs as I usually do, but I did always get outside for at least 30 mins on my dinner break. Of course this meant less time to eat dinner, so I tried to pack things that would be easy and fast to eat. Yogurt was definitely on the “easy and fast” list. I filled a thermos with yogurt, frozen fruit, pecans, chia seeds, and a drizzle of maple syrup. It was a very easy yet filling thing to eat and the thermos kept it cold. At first I felt like yogurt really wasn’t a dinner food, but it actually was pretty filling and got me through the evening rehearsal.
– Amazing colleagues, who are so very good at their jobs that even the hard stuff is not so hard. It’s not always easy, but it’s not so hard that I want to quit.
-The Husband, as always, who holds down the fort, did the after school pick up, fed the kids, took them to basketball practice, and skating lessons, and read to them, and put them to bed. All on his own.

I snapped this picture onstage one day while we were setting lighting cues. It’s the most snow I’ve seen all year. One rehearsal, I found myself standing underneath the snow bags as the snow was coming down and it was the oddest sensation – of being covered in snowflakes but not cold at all.

The most snow I’ve seen all year. Also… it gets into everything.

Tech Week Step Count:
Piano Tech Friday : 22, 475
Piano Dress Saturday: 24, 263
Sitzprobe Sunday: 12, 100
Orchestra Tech Monday: 17, 819
Orchestra Tech Tuesday: 11, 936
Orchestra Tech Wednesday: 15, 948
Final Dress Thursday: 11, 654
(Average of 16, 599 steps/day)

The next weeks will be a little busy because I’ll be in performances for one show while prepping/ rehearsing another show in another part of town. It will be a lot of time in the car, and the commute can be terribly slow, but I’ve started a new audiobook that makes me look forward to getting in the car:

I was looking for an audiobook for my commute and found this on the list of finalists for the 2023 Audie Awards. I’ve never read any Terry Pratchett, and people seem to really love his work, so I thought I’d give it a try. It is proving very funny and layered so far.

Other random ordinary life happenings:

It was Spirit Week for the 5th Grader. I feel somewhat guilty that I’m not the best person at keeping up with the various spirit weeks/ teacher appreciation weeks/etc. at school. I’ll see the email come through and then promptly forget. It’s not that I don’t appreciate the teachers or school spirit, it’s just that these weeks with some specific requirement every. single. day. seems light another kettlebell of mental load that I can’t handle, especially during tech week. I’m glad the 11 year old kept track of Spirit week because I knew it would make her happy to participate but I just couldn’t do it for her. Maybe this is growth? I forget about things so that she can develop a sense of responsibility to remember them? One morning was moustache day and I drew a moustache on her with Sharpie. A few days later, she comes to me with a sock on her hand and says, “It’s sock puppet day today.”

No use getting annoyed at the last minute request for sock puppet help, since I wouldn’t have been home in the evening to help anyway. But we did our best and I think it was pretty cute:

Fun fact – that hat is the hat that the 11 year old came home from the hospital wearing. We didn’t realize that we had to bring clothes to the hospital for our new baby so the nurses had to raid the NICU closet for us.

One day I had the morning off, so I volunteered at Field Day at the six year old’s school. I was put in charge of a volleyball station. Though “volleyball” and “put in charge of” are used very loosely here. It was chaotic – 20-40 kids at a time at my station – and there was lots of yelling of instructions. Also – teachers are amazing. Because they have to do it all. the. time.

A new smoothie shop opened around the corner from the Husband’s work place and they have a papaya smoothie that was very delicious. I discovered this little shop the day that I had to take my car in for a new tire. I had imprudently run up the curb in front of our our house one midnight when I got home from a late rehearsal. Because that’s just what I needed at that hour. Anyhow, the next morning, the Husband helped me change the tire. Also.. I went to open my trunk to get the jack and the spare out, and MY JACK WAS MISSING. What the what?!? You have to dig kind of deep to get to my jack, so I’m completely confounded by this. Or maybe I removed it at some point and couldn’t remember? Anyhow it was a completely bizarre mystery. Spare Tire put on and I went to Firestone to get a new tire. The six year old came with me to Firestone (Thank goodness I had warranty on my tires) and on the way back to the Metro to get home, we saw this new smoothie shop had opened. So we ordered smoothies – berry for him, dragon fruit for me. It was so fresh and tasty that I went back later that week and ordered a papaya smoothie. It sort of reminded me of the Papaya Milk drink that I would get from the Taiwanese drink store back in California. I sat in the spring sunshine in the plaza next to the smoothie shop to drink my papaya smoothie and it was such a wonderful quiet few minutes to myself.

Is there anything more lovely than a special cold beverages, sipped outdoors on a spring-almost-summer day?

There was also Mother’s Day in the mix. I did get to sleep in until 9am. Which was good because I had been up super late the night before at the opening night party. I don’t love going to work parties, because I’m just awkward socially and feel very uncool standing there clutching my Coke while people do suave things like chat with ambassadors and drink champagne. But, I did talk to some nice people – friends of a friend – and there was this amazing cheese spread:

And this was only one tiny corner of the cheese table.

Anyhow, the day after was Mother’s Day. I had a show to work in the afternoon so it didn’t feel very special. I don’t love Mother’s Day – again that whole feeling awkward about the attention thing. The one thing I did ask for Mother’s Day – getting a picture with all my kids – did not happen, so I was a little bummed about that. But the other thing I wanted – to eat dinner outside – that did happen. Granted, it was Chipotle because we had promised the 11 year old Chipotle for an excellent report card, but I still got to enjoy the warm evening. And the kids made a sign for me:

Grateful for:

-Wireless headsets. When I was first starting out in this business, there were no wireless headsets in the theatres where I worked. You got a headset and beltpack which was hard wired into a place in the wall so you either ran the show without a headset – which made it difficult to communicate with your stage manager – or you ran the show attached to this wall, with this really long tail or cable everywhere. Now when I started out I was working in small theatres, so having a wired headset was inconvenient but doable. If you were working in a big theatre, I guess you just ran the show without a headset and everyone just had to trust that things would happen and problems would get solved? It seems so inconceivable to me. Anyhow, we now have wireless headsets and we can roam the backstage and keep in touch with the rest of the stage management team, and I think that’s awesome.

-Our back patio. The weather has tipped into that between spring and summer time when there is longer days but the weather is not yet unbearably hot. My favorite time this time of year is the morning or early evening – when the sun is not at it’s zenith and the weather is slightly cooler – perfect for a light sweater, but okay if not. I love having a back patio and being able to sit back there with my tea in the morning, or a seltzer in the evening. Having a space to be able to enjoy the weather and the fresh air, a little table on which to put my beverage, and a chair to relax in and periodically a book to keep me company – that’s a good time right there.

– My car. And the mechanic who keeps it running. I drive a 2003 Subaru Legacy. It’s not the most fancy car these days, and it certainly has its chronic issues, but it gets me from point A to point B. I know its days are numbered, but I will drive it until it is no longer safe to do so. On my free day week, I took it in for an oil change and to have a belt tightened. My conversation to book the appointment with my mechanic went like this (Also note, we used to have three cars, but now only have two):
Me: I’d like to bring my car in for an oil change.
Mechanic: Yes of course. What is your phone number?
Me: [I tell him]
Mechanic: Oh yes. Which car of your fleet are you bringing in?
Me: The Subaru Legacy.
Mechanic: Oh Yes. The old one.

That made me laugh… I drive “the old one.”

But even still, it’s getting me from point A to point B. And these weeks when I’m working two jobs, I am doing a lot of getting from A to B.

Looking Forward To:
– Grilling with friends and colleagues. One of our traditions at work is to gather for a cookout once in a while and this year will be the first cook out since 2019. There are thirty+ people about to descend on the house. I’ve never hosted that many people before and honestly our yard is not that big. Also… I just realized that this will be more people than were at our wedding. Anyhow I’m hoping it will be pretty low key – grill, chairs, tables, people bring sides/apps/ beer, and we just hang out for an afternoon. Effortless. Easy. Plus, since a good number of them are stage managers, clean up is usually done before I can blink twice and accept the help.

– Summer. I have work booked until mid August this year, so I’ll have to be very purposeful to get some of our usual summer adventures in. It’s a balance, though… since we work six days a week, if I pack the day off with too many adventures, I might not have time to recharge and do the life maintenance things that I need to. But I am looking forward to the pool and outdoor music and hikes and camping and getting on my bike.

-I started watching The Gilded Age, a period drama that came out last year. It is by Julian Fellowes who wrote Downton Abbey and the cast is divine. It features some huge theatrical talents who, from what I understand, were all available for a mini series since COVID had shut down the theatres. I’m only one episode in, but it is proving that same blend of detailed and juicy yet proper that I loved about Downton Abbey. This is my new “while I wash the dishes” incentive.

– Working with a colleague whom I have known for over twenty years, but whom I haven’t seen since 2011. One thing about my work is many people come in and out of my life. Many of the colleagues from the early days when I was just starting out in opera are the most dear to me. We all started out as baby opera makers with big dreams and there is something really bonding about being in that stage of one’s career together. Some of these people are no longer in the industry, some of these people run their own opera companies now – funny the directions life takes you. Whenever we part ways at the end of a gig, I never say good-bye – it’s always, “See you later!” because I believe that our paths will cross again. When we finally do get to work together again, there is a sense of familiarity and growth that brings me so much joy and wonder.

What We Ate: It’s been a few weeks, but the Husband made all the dinners while I was in tech, so not quite so a very vague list…

Monday: Tortilla Soup. This recipe from the Two Sleevers website. Made a couple weeks ago and froze the leftovers. Present Me thanks Past Me for this foresight.

Tuesday: Eggplant Pasta. Vegan. Sautee eggplant with onions in InstantPot, add tomato sauce and pasta on top and cook on high pressure for 15 minutes. I made this to use up an eggplant we had in the fridge. The family was not a fan, but I thought it was perfectly fine. Vegan.

Wednesday: Eggs and leftovers.

Thursday: Take out Sandwiches. Again. This was the night we tried to go to an event at the local park where they had food trucks and live music. The place was swamped and the food trucks couldn’t keep up with the volume of people. Plus it was expensive. I think we paid $20 for 3 plain hotdogs. So we abandoned the park, went to our friends’ house, ordered sandwiches from our favorite deli and ate in the backyard while the kids bounced on their trampoline. I’d say it turned out to be a very nice evening.

Friday: Chana Masala in the Instant Pot. This recipe from the blog Feasting at Home. I thought this was really tasty and I ate it in wraps for lunch for the rest of the week. The family was lukewarm. It might have been because I forgot to turn the IP into “keep warm” and the food was cold by the time they got home.

Saturday: I had leftovers while at work. The family had pizza and movie night. I’m not sure what they watched.

Sunday: Dumplings and leftovers. I was at work and had yogurt for dinner.

Monday: all I have scribbled in my journal is “pasta”…. I think that means the Husband made tortellini and red sauce.

Tuesday: Wings. The Husband ordered wings from one of our favorite places. (Me: leftovers/yogurt at work)

Wednesday: Eggs and Toast. (Me: leftovers at work)

Thursday, Friday, Saturday: Complete Blank. I’m pretty sure the Husband cooked.

Sunday: Mother’s Day and Chipotle.

–

Weekly recap + what we ate: Gearing up for Tech Week

I did a big Costco run last week. Tech week is coming up and I felt like I had to stock up on snacks. Some new finds:

I like a spicy snack, and these two treats are opposite end of spicy. The almonds are spicy/ savory – perfect for when I’m tired of the sweet MLK. They are salty, smoky and crunchy with a little bit of heat. The Tamarind bites had intrigued me for a while and I finally decided to try them. I like tamarind a lot and I’ve always like chili spiced dried mango, so I figured these might be similar. These have that distinctive sweet/sour tamarind flavor with a nice kick from the chili. Not for eating by the handful, but I find one or two at a time very satisfying.

I got these strawberry yogurt bites more for the kids:

The kids really like yogurt tubes, but I can’t keep those in the car, so I thought this might be a nice alternative. They are sort of like yogurt covered raisins but with strawberry instead. The jury is out. They are a nice snack, but not very filling.

These protein bars:

I go back and forth on protein bars. I like the idea of them, but are they really better than just having a Snickers? I grabbed these because a guy standing next to me in the aisle said that it’s the only protein bar his gluten free son will eat. I’m very easily swayed by random strangers recommending things to me in store aisles. Anyhow, these are fine. They are a little larger than I expected, so feel like a lot. They taste okay to me and the ingredient list is not unexpected. Overwhelming endorsement, I know. I probably wouldn’t buy them again because they are on the pricy side, but if I need a gluten free bar, this isn’t a terrible option.

Other fun things:

Sometimes my kids take my camera and take really inane and unflattering pictures. Sometimes, though, they capture things like this:

Ignore me in the background blissfully unaware that my phone is gone. Look instead at the unbridled joy that the 6 year old captured.

That picture is going in my file of “Things to look at when I feel down.”

We also had Take Your Child To Work Day. The Husband took the kids to his office, where they had all sorts of fun activities – a Fire Truck, build a solar car, pizza lunch! Then he brought the kids to my work, where we had some late afternoon activities – build a prop flower, listen to some singers sing, tour the building, try on costumes. I was a little disappointed that the kids couldn’t come to rehearsal, but we have a no guest policy right now because of COVID. All the same, it was fun to see the kids at work briefly.

Very satisfying: I labelled the prop tables. There are a lot of props in my current show. The situation on the prop table had gotten quite chaotic – they had become some kind of random dump area. So one afternoon I just took the time and organized them and labelled spots for all the props. I do usually do this at some point in the process, but usually when there aren’t so many props it doesn’t feel as urgent. Or as satisfying when it is done. Opera aficionados can probably guess what opera this is:

Sort of annoying: The 3.5 year old got sent home with pink eye one day. The Husband went to pick her up and took her to the pediatrician and got drops then stayed home with her. I’m glad that he has a job that allows him to do that. I mean certainly if I had an emergency, I could have taken the afternoon off, but the Husband officially gets to take time off work. Benefits and all that.

Anyhow, we got drops for her, which she refused to let us put in:

It took a bit of bribery and holding her down to maybe get a drop in her eyes twice a day. And really, after the first day, bribery didn’t work.

Domestic Adventures: I made muffins in anticipation of tech. This time I made Coconut Peanut Mochi Muffins from Hetty McKinnon’s To Asia with Love. The muffins use sweet rice flour so they are gluten free, and they came out chewy like mochi but dense like a muffin. The swirl of peanut butter helps give it a substantial taste so that the muffin doesn’t tip into desert territory. I really liked these muffins and will definitely make them again. The kids didn’t love them, but the Husband did. The kids said it would be better with chocolate chips. Of course.

I did some mending. My favorite yellow linen pants had a hole in them from last fall when I accidentally poked them with my pencil. I decided to patch them and then saw that there was an even bigger hole on the left knee, so I patched that too. I find mending very satisfying. I do worry, though, that it might be considered not really acceptable to wear patched clothes at work. I patch my kids clothes all the time, but maybe the standard of appearance is different from kids vs. working professionals? Anyhow, I figured one of the benefits of working in the arts is that wearing patched clothes is probably okay since our dress code tends to be more relaxed and whimsy is not frowned upon. So I’ve been wearing them to work. Thank goodness because I really only have two or three pairs of pants right now.

We did a big purge of the kids’ toy room. The toys were getting overwhelming and the room was constantly messy. So we sat down and had the kids choose their five favorite toys/ sets and everything else got put into purgatory in the attic. This is what we were left with:
– Doll House and Castle
-Barbie house and accessories (This is a lot and I’m thinking that may need to be whittled down even more.)
-Magnaformers
-Blocks
-Train Tracks
-Matchbox cars and Hot Wheels garage (One cookie tin full.)
-Trucks (we led the six year old keep six trucks)
– Nugget and Fort play cushions
– Kitchen and accessories
– Baby Dolls and Toy Shopping Cart
– stuffies. Each kid got to keep five
– dress up clothes
-Swedish Climbing Ladder (This is bolted to the wall so had to stay, but the kids do legitimately play on it.)
-Things that the kids didn’t specifically say to keep, but which don’t take up a lot of room so we kept: The Speak n spell, Learn to Code Robot

Things that got sent to purgatory: Crazy Fort fort kit (which took up one big box – the kids really loved playing with this set during the pandemic, but they don’t build forts as much anymore), lots of trucks, all the craft kits, Transformers (surprisingly), stuffies not chosen.

What is left still feels like a lot. I guess since our kids are so far apart in age, there is going to be a wide range of toys. But we did put two big movie boxes of toys into the attic and just threw out a lot of the small or broken toys. (The 11 year old, who is a school bus patrol, apparently has been taking some of the small unmemorable figurines with her to the school bus and handing them out to younger kids as a reward for good behavior. I’m actually quite tickled that she is doing that. ) I think the ultimate goal is to whittle the toys down so they can go into another room, which will free up the toy room so that the 11 year old can have her own room. I think room sharing gets old once one is in the double digits. The toy room feels like a constant battle. I would love for it to be Pinterest organized and labelled, but the reality is if they can shove their toys easily to the side so that the cleaners can do the floors, I think I can begrudgingly live with that. So at least having fewer toys to shove into the perimeters will hopefully make said shoving go faster.

Something that made me smile: the six year old is starting to read, much to my surprise. during the Pandemic, I thought I might teach him using the How To Taech Your Child to Read in 100 Lessons, but it didn’t take. And then he got into a French Immersion program and we were told not to actively teach our kids to read because it sometimes confuses them as they are learning go read in French. So I just decided to let it go. We still read to him, but I didn’t try to ask him to sound out words or identify letters. Well the other day, I was driving him home and I heard … “ssssss- t- o…..p. Stop.” “can you read?” i asked him. “yeah.” “Who taught you?” “my brain.”

Grateful for:
– My Yeti Rambler with Hotshot lid. I had originally got this cup to keep my tea hot, but this week I also had the realization that it could also keep my drinks cold. Not sure why it took me so long to figure this out. Anyhow, it was perfect for making iced chai in the morning and sipping it all day long. One morning I even treated myself to a chai at my favorite coffee place near work and they put it in my Yeti and it was a nice pick me up all day long.
– Nice weather and longer hours of daylight. It had been raining all week which made the days kind of dreary. I had a happy hour scheduled with my mom’s group, and I thought it was going to have to be inside, but then the weather cleared up the afternoon of our happy hour. So we sat outside. And because we schedule our get togethers after bedtime, it was nice that the sun didn’t set until after 8pm so we still had some sunlight when we finally met up.
– This gratitude entry in my journal made me laugh: “Grateful for not moving the bar” There is a bar in our show. (As in there is a scene that takes place in a restaurant.) Of course we can’t have the real bar in the rehearsal room because it is part of the set. So have a substitute bar in rehearsal that is heavy as f*ck. Like it takes five people and six dollies to move it. We’ve been rehearsing in two rehearsal rooms so we had to move the bar one day from one room to the other, and it wasn’t fun. And then we thought we would have to move back to the first room again. But then the stage manager thought through the schedule and decided that we wouldn’t have to move it again, perhaps ever. So grateful.

Looking forward to:
-Tech week. Moving into the theatre! Prepping tech week food! I genuinely look forward to making sure I have food to get me though tech week. The week is long and stressful (I mean relatively – there are for sure more stressful jobs.), so I like to make sure I have food and snacks to get me through. In addition to the Costco snacks and mochi muffins, I’ll make a big batch of boiled eggs and bake muffins for a quick breakfast and have soup or curry that I can bring in a thermos for dinner.
– Meeting up with friends one evening at a park for food trucks and live music. It is starting to be live outdoor music season here, one of my favorite summer activities. I don’t know how many we’ll get to with my heavy work schedule this summer, but I’m trying to bookmark all my favorite events so I remember when they are happening. (we did this. It was kind of a bust – the park was over crowded and there weren’t enough food trucks for everyone and the food and beer wasn’t that good and it was expensive. So we bagged it and picked up sandwiches and went over to our friends’ house)
– Summer camp. This is still on the list because I still haven’t done it and I think if I make myself look forward to it being done, I will get it done. I thought I had an idea of what to do, but then the one camp I was thinking of only does ages 8-12, and I need something that both the 6 year old and 11 year old can do together. There are many advantages to having kids 5 years apart, but finding activities that both can do together is not one of them.

What we Ate:
Monday: Leftover Potatoe Leek Soup from the week before. Leftover soup has become one of our go to quick meal strategies.

Tuesday: Breakfast Sandwiches, made by the 11 year old.

Wednesday: Pasta and Meatballs in the Instant Pot.

Thursday: Sandwiches from Santucci’s, eaten in the park. Our first weekday park picnic of the season. Such an easy summer evening activity.

Friday: The Husband made stuffed zucchini. I ate leftovers at work.

Saturday: Happy Hour out with my mom’s group. I had mussels and asparagus. Meanwhile back at home, the Husband made pizza and the family watched the second Boss Baby movie. (The kids had watched the first movie on the plane to/from Amsterdam. Yes, they watched it twice.)

Sunday: Mac and cheese from the blue box and salad. Made my the 11 year old. I just realized – she made dinner twice this week. That feels kind of cool.

Weekly recap + what we ate: big ticket items and small pleasures

Another full week, but not as packed as the week before, thank goodness- On Monday we started rehearsals for a my next show, and that evening I had my last titles gig of the season. I worked 5 evening during the week, so I’m feeling really behind on the home front. Laundry, general house picking up, spaces that need to be organized, the living room still needs curtains. I also still need to register the two older kids for summer camp and I’m starting to have a little bit of anxiety about that. And we still have to renew our pool membership for the summer.

And all of it is big ticket items. I think in my mind we got through the expensive part of the year with our spring break trip and I’m waiting for a less expensive month, but really it doesn’t come.

Some highlights of my week:
– Slowly getting back into running. I did one pre-rehearsal run and one dinner break run, both less than 1.5 miles, but it’s something. I attempted another run on Saturday on the dinner break. The weather looked iffy, but I thought I could beat the rain. I was wrong. About 3/4 of a mile out it started to sprinkle. Then it turned into a deluge. Like one of those “I stood under a restaurant awning for 10 minutes hoping it would pass but eventually gave up and ran the four blocks back to work” kind of deluge. I was quite the sad soddened mess. And the dumb thing is I didn’t check the weather before hand that day; the morning was gorgeous so I didn’t even bring a raincoat. wump wump.

– Balloons in rehearsal. There are balloons in rehearsal. Bright colourful balloons. I got to use the helium tank and blow them up. It made me happy. One of my co-workers offered to take them down to the rehearsal hall for me, and I was like, “No way! I blew them up, I want to carry them down the hallway!” Of course they were sad and droopy by the next day, but that’s okay.

– The voice recital that I did supertitles for. Most of the songs were new to me, but there were two I absolutely loved. The first is called A Soft Day. It’s by a English composer C.V. Stanford, based on a poem by Winifred Letts. The poem describes a day that is damp and quiet and full of nature.

A soft day, thank God!
A wind from the south
With a honeyed mouth;
A scent of drenching leaves,
Briar and beech and lime,
White elder-flower and thyme
And the soaking grass smells sweet,
Crushed by my two bare feet,
While the rain drips,
Drips, drips, drips from the eaves.

A soft day, thank God!
The hills wear a shroud
Of silver cloud;
The web the spider weaves
Is a glittering net;
The woodland path is wet,
And the soaking earth smells sweet
Under my two bare feet,
And the rain drips,
Drips, drips, drips from the leaves.

I love poems that are able to capture a moment so precisely in words that I can almost feel the misty air around me. The song setting of this poem has that same relaxed and pensive feeling to it. And the way the notes “drip” like the rain…

British contralto Kathleen Ferrier. Pianist Frederick Stone. Such elegant singing.

My second favorite song in the recital was a beautifully sweet lullaby by Puccini. Puccini wrote lots of operas, big, grand affairs. I guess he also wrote lots of songs too, and I thought this one, Sogno d’or (Golden Dreams) was lovely. In it a parents sings to a child about how the angels will come to them as they sleep. You can listen to it here.

Soprano Krassimira Stoyanova. I worked with her years ago – she was a lovely person. We managed to communicate despite her not speaking English and me not speaking Italian.

Sunday was my day off, and even though there is not skating lessons this week since it is between sessions, I still took the kids skating. Actually the whole family went, though the Husband only sat and watched. It’s been so fun to see the kids get more and more confident on their skates. The three year old can skate by herself now, even though she insists on holding my hand while we skate.

In the afternoon we went downtown to meet my cousin who was in town for work. One thing I like about living near D.C. is that people often come to town for work, so we get to see them. We met my cousin at the National Postal Museum, which is one of my favorite of all the Smithsonian Museums. They have lots of informative and interactive exhibits which I find appeals to both me and the kids. Kids can learn how to sort mail, and design their own stamps and collect stamps too.

After the Postal Museum we walked down to Chinatown and had dinner at Jaleo, a tapas restaurant that is quite well known here. We decided to order the shrimp and squid paella in addition to a variety of tapas. I’ve been to Jaleo several times, but never ordered the paella; I think in my mind, a dish that’s mostly rice sounds unexciting. Well. I was proven wrong. The paella was heavenly. We also ordered dessert and there was a rice pudding with a lemon cream. Rice pudding, also something that is a very pedestrian desert in my mind, but which was divine in this iteration. I might have to reconsider my prejudice against rice.

Something that makes me smile: my pen holder from Muji and my red pencil. Years ago a colleague introduced me to 0.9 lead and it’s been my lead thickness of choice ever since. Of course everyone at work now used 0.9 lead pencils and we were constantly mixing up pencils since the barbells were all the same color. Eventually I stuck a piece of tape on mine so I knew which one was mine. When I found that Amazon sells my favorite pencils in my favorite color red, and not only that, in packs of 12, I immediately got a box and now I always know which 0.9 lead pencil is mine.

The pen holder, I found of the Japanese houseware store Muji. I was always putting my pencil down and forgetting where it was. Now, I have this clip on my binder and my pencil – and the green Frixion pen that I use to mark entrances – live there and I always know where it is. That adage “A place for everything” – I feel like this pen clip embraces that for me, at least in this small area of life. It’s not just about my writing utensils’ location but about containment and security. It makes me happy and feels so satisfying knowing where to put my pencil after I jot a notes, and to be able to find it when I need it.

A link I loved: I always enjoy the New York Times “By the Book” column where they interview noted people about their favorite books, not so favorite books, reading habits, etc. This week’s column features Judy Blume, and it is excellent. I put a lot of the books she mentioned in my TBR list, and have already started Sherman Alexie’s The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian and two chapters in it is already by turns hilarious and hesrtbreaking. I think of Judy Blume mostly as the author of “Superfudge”. I do remember reading “Are You There, God? It’s Me Margaret” but not really relating to it as much as I thought I would. Maybe it’s time for a re-read?

Grateful for:
– a morning walk with a friend. Several days I had afternoon and evening rehearsals, so I had the morning off. One morning, my friend from the bus stop asked if I wanted to go for a walk, so we did. The weather was nice, sunny, spring time weather. Afterwards we made plans to meet up at the park on Friday when the kids’ were off school. This friend is moving at the end of the summer – her husband is in the foreign service – and it makes me a sad that they are moving because I feel like I don’t make friends’ easily. I’m really glad she started talking to me at the bus stop one morning. They’ll be back in a couple years, though – I’ll just have to keep in touch.
– Having a car and being able to drive the kids to school. Another school bus related thing. One day, the morning school bus did not come at all. After half an hour of waiting, the parents who were at the stop took all the kids that were still waiting for the bus to school – whomever had a free seat in their car took a kid. I’m grateful that this is a community where this generosity is not weird and people are just willing to give another kid a ride to school without a second thought.
– Getting to listen to really talented people make music. For this show, I’m running the stage left side of stage. In rehearsal it means that from where I sit I get a prime view of the rehearsal pianist. I am in awe of how their hands dance over the keyboards, up and down, fast and slow. Sometimes they even sing the parts of the chorus or other characters who aren’t in rehearsal while their hands sprint across the notes. I try to find moments to savor every day and last week, many of those moments were watching the rehearsal pianists.

Looking forward to:
– Finalizing summer camp plans. As in looking forward to it being done, much the same way I was looking forward to our taxes being done.

– Happy Hour with moms from my mom’s group.

– reading this book. I love a good Jane Austen retelling and this one is proving pretty fun and thoughtful.

What we ate: (a lot more eating out than normal this week. I feel like we’re kind of in a meal planning slump)

Monday- I had my titles gig so I got take out from Beefsteak – tofu kimchi bowl. I am not sure what everyone else ate.

Tuesday- Pasta salad with the leftover grilled veggies from the Sunday before. vegan. I was working, so I made this in the morning before I went to work.

Wednesday – The Family had take out wings to celebrate a good report card. I was at work and brought leftover pasta salad.

Thursday – vegetarian tortilla soup in the Instant Pot. From this recipe from Two Sleevers website (aka the Butter Chicken Lady). Made in the morning before I went to work.

Friday – The Husband took the kids out to eat because they were off school and the 11 year old had a basketball game upcountry. I probably lay had leftovers.

Saturday- Pizza and movie night. The family watched Might Ducks. I went out for a drink with colleagues after work and missed the movie.

Sunday – Jaleo with my cousin.

Weekly recap + what we ate: pre-trip version

We are home from our spring break trip! Where we went:

Recaps to come. I hope. I still think I want to write recaps from our Montreal Trip too, so clearly I am behind.

But a quick rundown of the week before, since I selfishly like having these accounting of my days…

It was a week off of work, which was great because I could get some last minute errands and pre-trip things done.

some Highlights:
– Going for a cherry blossom run. I had always heard that the Kenwood neighborhood also has beautiful cherry blossoms, and it was less crowded than going to the Tidal Basin, so I thought I’d check it out. When I looked it up, I saw that there is a trail next to it, so I decided to combine my run with a cherry blossom wander. I parked at one of the lots off the trail that lead to the Kenwood neighborhood and had a little run then spent the rest of the morning wandering the streets. It was not as crowded as the Tidal Basin, so I felt like I was able to amble and savor at my own pace, though the blossoms in Kenwood are not the panoply of colors one sees downtown. It’s so interesting that this little neighborhood becomes such a cherry blossom hot spot. It was at the tail end of cherry blossom peak bloom and there was a light breeze, which sent cherry blossom petals drifting through the air and scattered on the roads.

-The six year old had a concert. The French Immersion students put on a concert every year, though apparently it hasn’t happened in a while because of the pandemic. Each class presents some kind of musical performance in French. The kindergartener show involved singing and dancing to a song about chocolate. I know I put on shows for a living, but I am seriously impressed by the coordination that it takes to organize 200+ kids to sing and dance in French. It’s always funny for me to go see school shows because there is a certain level of chaos that I would never see at my work, and yet… things always work out and people get onstage and offstage. I mean I just have to stage manage, but the teachers have to direct, choreograph, child wrangle, cajole, cheerlead… what full jobs they have… on top of the every day teaching.

The black light and fluorescent vests made me laugh.

– I got a discount on a book! I went to Barnes and Nobles to pick up a book for my flight. I usually like to read a book by someone from the country that I was visiting, so this is the one I chose:

Anyhow, as I was leafing through it, I noticed that the inside blurb page was upside down – you can see in the picture how the strip of the stepback is white and it should be red. I would have bought the book anyway because I wanted to read it and this gaffe wouldn’t have affected reading the book. But I took it to the front desk, pointed out the flaw, and they gave me 20% discount!

Giggle of the week –
This sign, seen in the neighborhood, which abounds with Little Free Libraries:

I feel like the six year old would take advantage of that too.

Grateful For:
– Public Transportation – I had lunch with a friend one day and I could take the metro there. It was just as fast as driving, but much more relaxing, and I could read my book a little.
– A friend for lending me a suitcase. I was going to buy a new suitcase since the wheels of my carry on rolling suitcase have come apart. I’ve had that suitcase for almost twenty years, so I guess it was about time to replace it. But when we went to look at suitcases, I was so overwhelmed by the options and couldn’t pick one. Relating my suitcase woes to my friend, she said, “I have one that you can borrow!” So I did. It saved me money and it saved me the mental energy of having to choose a suitcase. Sometimes having something just given to me is even more perfect than having to choose it myself.

-Time. Last week, I had more money than time, what with being unemployed and all. I think about this a lot. Sometimes when I’m unemployed I find my spending goes out of control because I finally have the time to browse/choose/buy those new shoes to replace the ones with holes that I have been making do with, or catch up on house projects, or refresh the kids’ wardrobes. I find when I’m thick in work, I don’t tend to throw money at things, rather I just decide to hobble through and replace things when I have time to think about it. But of course it means that I tend to have the time to spend money when I’m not making any money – which doesn’t even out as much as I would like. I suppose the answer, somewhat, is to increase my income. But also I think I should lean into thinking about how to spend time not money when I’m unemployed. Some things do need to be replaced, but maybe some things can be repaired? I sewed up a hole in a sweater that I wanted to take for vacation rather than buying a new one. And also – I went on the abovementioned run to see the cherry blossoms in Kenwood. It’s the kind of thing I wouldn’t have had time to do while working, but when I don’t have to be in at work, I can do these things. I can use time to buy moments of beauty. I can use time to buy moments of connection, like when I have lunch with friends. (Okay, also it took money to pay for lunch, but we could have just as easily gone for a walk and visit, or she could have come over for tea… the food wasn’t the important part.) Anyhow… when I’m feeling money poor and time rich, maybe I need to think about the things that time can buy me. On that note, I realize how lucky I am that I do have time – there are many people who have neither time nor money and that must be so stressful and hard.

What We Ate:

Monday: Chickpea noodle soup from Vegan for Everyone by America’s Test Kitchen. The six year old wanted veggie soup and I had celery to use up- I feel like I make this a lot when those two boxes need to be checked. Vegan.

Tuesday: Waffles. Quick dinner before the six year old’s school concert. I had heard a hack earlier this year of measuring two batches of dry ingredients when you make/bake something so that you just have to add the wet ingredients later on for a second batch. I thought this brilliant so last time I made waffles, I measured a second portion of the dry ingredients into a container and put it in the pantry. When I needed a quick dinner this night, I just tossed in the wet ingredients and everything was came together super quickly. I know measuring the dry ingredients doesn’t take that much time, but when you factor in finding things, hauling it out, measuring, and then putting it back away… to be able to just dump it in a bowl… pre-making the dry ingredients has the ease as if we were making our favorite waffle recipe from a box mix.

Wednesday: Dinner out with friends from out of town. I had pasta with mushrooms. There was parker house rolls with bacon jam involved.

Thursday: Off in an airplane!

Weekly recap + What We ate: Learning to find the moments even in tech

Well, that last weekend was a very full weekend! And it was followed by a very full week, so I’m posting about a week behind. There has been the time suck of ill children this week, and this post has been sitting languishing in my drafts folders for many many days. But for those of your following along, here’s the run down of life lately….

First off, we hosted the 11 year old’s basketball team for a sleepover. They came over Friday night, we had a build your own pizza station, and they made a huge Thank You Poster for their coach. I think six girls stayed the night. There wasn’t a lot of sleeping. Which I expected. What I didn’t expect (and maybe I should have?) was that most of the girls brought some kind of screen, either a phone or a tablet. So even though I told them to turn their lights out at 11pm and took away the tv remote, they were still up on their devices. I’m torn as to whether or not I should have collected their devices at Lights Out. On the one hand, sleepovers are kind of supposed to be a free for all, but on the other hand, the 11 year old commented to me afterwards how people didn’t really interact as much as she wanted – no one would play Uno with her, for example – because they were all on their screens on looking on to someone else’s screen. I don’t know if next time, I should tell the parents to leave their kids’ screens at home, or to just be stricter about collecting them, or have more organized activities?

After the last kid was picked up, I decided that I needed to get out of the house so we went to a nearby trail for a little walk. It’s not the most picturesque trail, but it was nice to see some signs of spring and the kids liked climbing the rocky outcrop they found.

Then off to work and opening night, which went smoothly. I fee like there was a somewhat collective sigh of relief that we got this show to opening, since last time we did this show, there was a global pandemic and we had to stop before the first onstage orchestra rehearsal. Funny story, there is a sign on a bulletin board in the theatre dated, March 3th, 2020 that encourages mask using. I’m not sure if the memo is left up out of neglect or some odd sense of memorium.

Then daylights savings the next day, which I had completely forgotten about, but somehow the Husband managed to get the two little kids up and to 8:30am mass on time. Daylights savings after a late night is always tough. I was so disoriented when I woke up to a quiet house and a watch that say 8:45am, and a clock that said 9:45am.

The Husband brought the kids home in time for me to bundle them back up and go to skating lessons. After skating lessons, there was a park, then home for lunch. Then we had a family adventure to the outlets to try to find some luggage. We wanted to get the 11 year old her own rolling suitcase for our Spring Break Trip, and we found something for her at the Samsonite store. Of course the two little kids also decided they wanted luggage, but let’s be real, I don’t know that the three year old is going to pull her own rolling suitcase through an airport. So we stopped by Target and got them (relatively) inexpensive rolling suitcases – cheerful luggage that will hopefully last three or four years. I still need to replace my rolling suitcase – it’s well over 20 years old, the wheels have disintegrated and it’s actually probably a little too long to fit in the overhead these days. A project for the weeks to come, I think.

On the way home, the Husband called an audible for dinner and we ended up at Dog Fish Head brewery for dinner, which was a tasty way to finish off the weekend, and a much needed bit of de-stressing since I think we were all cranky and overwhelmed by the shopping. There are just so. many. options. in the world. Then we went home and watched the Oscars.

Anyhow, the week before that very busy weekend was the rest of tech week, which went pretty smoothly. The schedule eased up quite a bit once we started rehearsing with orchestra, and we even had a few days without rehearsal. I know I say this all the time, but I still feel like I’m not great at switching between working 12 hours a day and 2 hours a day. I find I tend to be a slug on lighter work days and then life tasks don’t get done – so trying to find ways to balance the need to slug and the need to get through the list of things that had been put off during tech.

The three year old continued her contributions to science by participating in the trail for the Pfizer booster. It had occurred to me last month that she was eligible for the booster, and when I asked the group that administers the trial if I could go ahead and get her booster, they said I could but then she would have to withdraw from the trial. So… figuring that things were pretty low risk right now, and that the $150 might be nice for her college fund, we decided to wait until the booster trial opened up. That turned out to be a three hour appointment. But she got a cute teddy bear out of it!

Some random thoughts on the Oscars: I didn’t get to watch all of it because bedtime fell right in the middle of everything, but what I did see checked a lot of boxes for glamour, pretty people, and touching thank you speeches that reminded me how powerful public gratitude can be. Some thoughts:
-The clothes! Let’s be real, this is why I watch – I think I’ve seen exactly one of the movies that were nominated. (Tar, for the record) My favorite gown was Cara Delevingne’s huge red dress. I thought it was classic Hollywood glamour on a large scale. And also the Rock in the blush pink satin tuxedo. That made me smile.

It’s a little shiny, but I love the pop of colour in a sea of black.

– The folks who won for Best Live Short, singing happy birthday to one of their stars, James Martin. I mean how awesome is that? You have a global platform and only 45 seconds, and you use it to give your star the gift of two thousand people singing happy birthday?

– A moment that really connected for me was when Ernestine Hipper, who won for Production Design said, “When I started this, I was told – don’t ever forget, you are only as good as your team… ” And it made me think of my awesome colleagues and how I had just had a hard tech week and thank goodness I have a rock solid beyond competent team of stage managers to work with me because they make me look good, and it would have definitely been harder without them.

– Everything, Everywhere, All at Once sweeping the awards. I have yet to see this movie, but I very much want to. I mean how many times will I get to see a movie where the main character wears a print blouse and a puffer vest, just like my grandmother did? So that was lovely, and all the speeches thanking immigrant parents really hit close to home. The Asians who thanked their parents for letting them do what they wanted…

Grateful For:
– A very smooth opening night and the privilege to work on this show.
– Smiling Mind meditations. I’m (still) trying to wean the three year old at night. I’m feeling slightly ridiculous about this, but sometimes it’s the only pathway to sleep. Lately I’ve been able to get her to sleep before she demand “Milk!!!!” by playing a bedtime meditation for her and the six year old after we read books. I’ve been using the app Smiling Mind, an app based out of Australia. I picked it mostly because it is free, but the cute Australia accent is nice to listen to as well. There aren’t a whole lot of options for meditations, but my kids are creatures of habit and listen to the same one over and over again.
– Small moments to savor this week – the little bits of things that let me pause and enjoy being, like…
Golden sunsets on my dinner time run:

Steaming cups of chai. I’ve been making my own chai concentrate at home and enjoying a cup of chai in the afternoons, wrapping my cold hands around the fragrant warmth of the cup of milky brown tea. I find the pre-made chai too sweet for my taste so I started experimenting with making my own. I’m still working out the perfect recipe; I can’t seem to get my chai spicy enough. Currently I’m using cardomon pods, star anise, cinnamon stick, black peppercorn, ginger and tumeric. Maybe more ginger? Maybe grate the ginger?

Packing lunches for the kids. It seems silly to be grateful for such a tedious chore, but after working so many evenings and being gone for bedtime, I felt grateful that I could do this one thing for my kids every day. (Well, not every day. About half the time the 11 year old packs her own lunch.)

For the kids being adorable and cute and at that age when they get a lot of joy out of dressing alike. I had picked up this blue eagle shirt for the six year old a couple of years ago and he looooooves wearing his shirt. “My Robot Eagle Shirt”, he calls it. And he always wears it with red bottoms. I was worried what would happen when he outgrew the shirt, but then I was able to find the shirt one size bigger on Poshmark. Anyhow, now the original shirt has been passed on, and the kids do cute things like this:

This jigsaw puzzle – a soothing opportunity to shift my brain during rehearsal breaks. One of my co-workers brought in this charming puzzle made by Wentworth Wooden Puzzles – the pieces are made of wood and feel so satisfying to click into place, and some of the pieces are shaped like objects. I thought this clipboard was very appropriate for our Stage Management Office.

I’m a beginner puzzler, but I thought this puzzle fantastic!

The clean living room. One day, the 11 year old declined to go out running errands with us, saying that she would stay home and tidy. I was skeptical. But we got home and lo and behold:

Spring. I took a few hours to wander at the botanical gardens one day, to pause and breathe and enjoy the colours of spring.

Looking Forward To:
– Weekday lunch with the Husband. Like a date, almost.
– Time to breathe and work on all the things that get put off during tech.
– My brother and his family are coming to visit this summer! It’s a couple months away, but we haven’t seen them in a while, so I’m excited to see them.

What We Ate:

Saturday: I brought at hummus and cucumer sandwich to work. The Husband made pizza for movie night. I think they watched The Good Dinosaur.

Sunday: The Husband and kids had dumplings. I had Green Room chicken – as in there was a catered event at the theatre next door, which my friend was working. There was too much food leftover, so my friend brought it over and I had chicken and rice and salad for dinner.

Monday: The Husband made waffles with sauteed mushrooms for the kids. I packed ramen to eat at work.

Tuesday: Roasted Garlic Potato Soup from Family by Hetty McKinnon. Made before I went to work and was able to take myself a thermos full. The kids said this was bland, but the Husband and I thought it was tasty. Actually the best part was the salty paprika garlic almonds that the recipe calls for as a garnish. Vegan.

Wednesday: Vegetarian Jap chae. A kitchen sink, clean out the fridge meal. Vegan.

Thursday: Veggie quiche, made before I went to work. Another attempt to use up veggies in the fridge.

Friday: Pizza/ basketball team sleepover.

Saturday: Leftovers for me. The Husband and kids had pizza (homemade, I think?) and watched Frozen.

Sunday: Dog Fish Head Brewery. I had nachos and the ahi tuna sandwich. It all felt very indulgent.