museums – Life Off Headset

Weekly recap + what we ate: Back to school 2024!

Well we’re off to the races with the 2024-2025 school year. And a new month. Whew. It was a pretty uneventful first week. The kids went to school. They came home. Extracurricular activities haven’t yet started, and I’m not yet working on a show, so it does feel like we are easing into the new school year.

First day of school celebratory boba run coupled with an Hmart trip.

Right out of the gate, though, the 7th grader’s middle school had their Back to School Night on Thursday. It felt a little soon to have a Back To School Night the fourth day of school, but oh well. I was glad of a chance to go – aside from the school plays and some early pick ups in the office, I haven’t really seen her middle school yet; last year it seemed as if every school event was on an evening when I had to work. At Back to School Night, the majority of the evening had the parents/guardians going to their student’s classes in order, with six minutes in each class and four minutes to get from one period to the other. Each student has seven classes a day, plus advisory and homeroom- down hallways, up stairs, from one end of school to another. I don’t know how the 12 year old manages this every day. I was exhausted by the end of the evening, but it was nice to put faces to the teachers and get a sense of what school is like for her. Last year I found middle school to be a huge black hole – the kid went to school. There were weekly newsletters that came home – all good things though. Once in a while a message from the Principal about an incident, or a form for me to sign. A few times a year, I saw grades. I suppose middle school is just one more step to independence and not knowing what my kid is up to.

My mother and my aunt were still in town most of last week. They had gone to New York City, but came back mid week. We did some less obvious touristy things. One day we went downtown to the Kennedy Center. We didn’t see a show or anything, but it’s just a beautiful building to walk around, and we had lunch at the Cafe on the roof, where there is a wonderful view of DC. There is an exhibit on JFK and his role in the arts. On that day, since we were already in the city, we went to the Portrait Gallery. I mainly picked the Portrait Gallery because it’s an easy metro ride and also I love sitting in its courtyard. There was an exhibit on Hollywood portraits, what I really liked seeing.

One of the portraits was of Merle Oberon, which I found fascinating because I didn’t realize that she was half South Asian. The blurb next to her portrait talked about how she had to hide her mixed race identity because of discrimination. I think of how I have half Asian kids and how it’s kind of no big deal because being mixed race a) is kind of a meaningless term – what is “race” anyhow? and b) is so common these days. I once read a statistic that the majority of kids will be of mixed race in the next ten years. (Or something like that – don’t quote me – it’s one of those statistics that’s stuck in my head, but I don’t remember where I heard it.) So thinking about being a mixed race person when it wasn’t so common and even considered scandalous is one of those things that I find really interesting to read about.

The day after that, we went to The National Museum of Health and Medicine, which is just a mile from my house. It’s a collection of body parts and medical equipment and photos and artifacts and such things related to the human body and how it can fall apart. The collection was started during the Civil War when doctors were encouraged to keep specimens of body parts and what not for research purposes. The most famous thing about it is that it has the bullet that killed Lincoln, along with some of his hair and the bloody cuffs of the doctor who operated on him. I didn’t realize this, but it also has a piece of President Garfield’s spine as well, from when he was shot. I kind of feel like you need to have a very strong stomach and sense of curiosity to go to this museum. It was especially interesting to go to the museum with my aunt who is a physician. She reminisced about her medical school days and pointed out the body parts and organs that were on display and told me all about what they did. The lady is amazing – she is 77 years old and still sees patients three days a week.

The last day of my Aunt’s visit, we took a trip to Longwood Gardens. What a beautiful riot of summer colour! I’m always glad for a visit to Longwood Gardens.

Labor Day Monday I took the three kids to the Renaissance Festival. I hadn’t originally planned to go over Labor Day weekend, but on Sunday our friends told us they were planning on going the next day, so it seemed like as good a time as any to go. Plus our other weekends in September were going to be full of kids’ activities. We had a great time. We saw the jousting (twice!), fencing shows, acrobats, Shakespeare parodies. We listened to loud feet-stomping, heart expanding music, ate turkey legs, reveled in people watching. The weather was gorgeous – warm and sunny with a breeze at just the right moments. The kids got sticky with melted ice cream and dirty with playground mulch. We laughed and wandered and had an all around great time.

Dressed up in all the layers. You can’t see it, but she’s also wearing fairy wings.

I think I did really well pacing our day. Once I (like Oliver Burkeman says) get used to the idea that you can’t see everything, then I think I could enjoy the things I did see without the sense that I should be somewhere else. I had each of the kids pick one thing they really wanted to do, and then planned around that. The 12 year old wanted to eat fried food, the 7 year old wanted to see the jousting, the 4 year old wanted to ride the pony, I wanted to see shows and laugh. So I looked at the schedule and map and plotted it out as soon as I got there. I picked four shows to anchor our day – 12 noon jousting, 2:00pm Death Scenes from Shakespeare, 3:30p Vixes En Garde, 5pm Piper Jones show. Then in and around we ate turkey legs (side note – these have gotten really expensive! They are now $12 a pop. I guess I’m okay with it, but it’s a little alarming), went to the pirate playground, shopped, and went on the Pony ride. It also helped that we met up with our friends who had three kids, so the older kids could take off together while I stuck with the little kids.

Coordinating with my friends was a little difficult at first because with all the mass of humanity at the Ren Faire – and it was very crowded – my cell phone couldn’t find a way to make calls or send text messages. I think next time I need a better, more concrete plan ahead of time of where to meet people. One we met up with my friends, though, I really enjoyed Ren Fairing with friends.

Food on a stick- the 7 year old has sausage, the four year old has mac n cheese.

Oh, and the one thing I was the MOST excited about – they’ve put in water bottle fillers at our Ren Faire! For years, I’ve carted so four full Nalgenes with me to the Faire, because I’m too cheap to pay for water at the Faire. Well this year, there were three water bottle fillers (labelled “drinking water from the well”) Yay. Ren Faire gets better and better every year!

Inspirational Thought of the week: We are due for a huge decluttering effort at our house, so I’ve been listening to Decluttering and organizational podcasts for inspiration. Last week I was listening to A Slob Comes Clean’s episode called “How to Get Motivated” and she said

“There is no way to fail at better.”

Whoa. Her point is that even throwing away one piece of trash makes things better, and as long as you are moving towards “better” no matter how small the steps, you are not failing. I have to remember that when the prospect of decluttering (or anything large) feels overwhelming.

Kid Quote of the Moment:
The 7 year old can be a bit of a stubborn grumpy bear. But when something goes the way he wants it too, his delight is unparalleled. His latest catch phrase when something goes well – “Perfection wins again!”
I have no idea where he got that phrase from, but it makes me really happy every time he says it.

Grateful For:
-School Buses and school bus drivers. Amazingly, the school bus was on time in both the morning and the afternoon last week. Well except for one day when the bus broke down and they had to get a replacement. Even so, the bus ended up only being thirty minutes late, which seems pretty efficient given that they had to go find a whole other bus and driver. So I’m grateful for the school bus and school bud driver that takes my kid to school safely.

-A nice visit with my mom and my aunt. I don’t get to see my aunt very often, so it was lovely to have her stay with us for five nights.

– The kids’ piano teacher. A few weeks ago, while out for a walk with my 12 year old, she said to me, “You know what? Piano is my favorite extracurricular activity!” This made me really happy to hear because she loves music so much but there were a couple of years where we fought a lot about lessons and practicing. I give a lot of credit for this to her piano teacher who is so patient and positive with her but also challenges her.

Looking Forward To:

-Lunch with a friend. I start working on a show in October, with some hours here and there the next couple of weeks, so I want to schedule some fun social weekday things in September before my schedule makes that difficult.

-Planning our trip to Malaysia. On the way to Longwood Gardens, we listened to some podcasts about travel to Malaysia. (I like listening to destination/ travel podcasts for trip inspiration.) It really got me eager to start researching and planning the activities we will do with our four days there. It seems like all the really beautiful beaches are a bit farther than we want to go with just four days, so we’ll probably just stay in Kuala Lumpur.

-September declutter-palooza! As I mentioned above, we’ve decided that September will be a big month for decluttering since I will have a lighter schedule and am home more. The main areas are the attic and the current toy room, which needs to be cleaned out so we can put the guest bed in there and make the guest bedroom into the 12 year old’s room. The 12 year old currently shares a room with her two younger siblings. It’s partly because I can’t wrap my brain around setting up a room for her (so many logistics! Need to buy new furniture!), also partly because I like having all the kids on the same floor as us and giving the 12 year old her own room would mean putting her downstairs. Anyhow – I know I need to just get over this because a 12 year old should not have to share a room with her 7 year old brother and 5 year old sister if she can help it. (Although part of me thinks – my father shared a room with 7 siblings. But he lived in rural Taiwan. Life was different… Everyone looks at me like I’m a horrible mother when I tell them my 12 year old still shares a room with her siblings.) Anyhow, I’m excited about/dreading declutter-palooza. I know our house will be a lot better once we go through things and purge and shift. But… so much work, and I get attached to things. Hence listening to decluttering podcasts for inspiration. Maybe I should document the efforts here for some accountability.

What We Ate:

Monday: Stir fried eggplant with black bean sauce and tofu.

Tuesday: Tortellini with sausage. Fruit on the side.

Wednesday: Grilled chicken drumsticks and cucumber and cabbage noodle salad with black bean sauce.

Thursday: Pasta Salad. This was a kitchen sink meal. We came home on the late side and I didn’t have anything planned, so I chopped a bunch of tomatoes, cucumbers and peppers, and threw them in a bowl with some cooked pasta and canned tuna. Added a red wine vinegar vinegrette. It was much tastier than I thought it would be.

Friday: Pizza (the Husband made) and Young Woman and the Sea, a recent film about Trudy Ederle, who in 1926 was the first woman to swim the English Channel, and she did it faster than any of the men before her. Disney sport movies are always predictably sentimental, and I am a sucker for that. I really liked this movie. I thought the story was inspiring and performances delightful to watch.

Saturday: Dinner out at The Olive Lounge after our trip to Longwood Gardens. I had a really delicious truffle pasta.

Sunday: Burgers and hot dogs and grilled zucchini. We had some friends over to grill- one of those super casual impromptu gatherings that you can have when you know your friends won’t judge you for not cleaning.

Monday: Grilled cheese and fruit. We didn’t get hime from the Ren Faire until almost 8pm so dinner was something quick and easy.

Onward to September! How was your holiday weekend? Have you ever had to share a room with a sibling? Pluses or minuses?

Weekly recap + what we ate: July highlights/August Aspirations, 2024

Prop table. I love me a well-labelled prop table. I did something a little different this time and labelled the prop table by character rather than by object.

I’m enjoying the tail end of another weekend alone. The Husband has again taken the kids away on a road trip, this time to Indiana. They are going to visit friends, go to the Indiana State Fair, visit my in-law’s grave sites, and go to the Indianapolis Children’s Museum. Is he an awesome dad or what?

I am at home by myself because I have to work so I couldn’t go along. I’ve had a nice few days, though. Even though the husband is the one who went away, I’m pretty sure I had the more restorative few days. Things I’ve done:

-Dinner with some friends whom I haven’t seen in ages.

– Drove up to Philadelphia to see the Mary Cassatt exhibit at the Philadelphia Art Museum. I had really wanted to see this exhibit, and sort of vaguely thought about going, but never made plans. When I saw the exhibit was closing in September, I was a little sad that I was going to miss it, but then I thought, “Why can’t I go see it?” No reason whatsoever! So I bought tickets and drove up. I think I would have taken the kids if I had had them this weekend, but being able to go by myself felt super indulgent. It was a beautiful exhibit, featuring a variety of Cassatt’s works – paintings, prints, pastels, sketches. I particularly loved seeing the sketches, and getting a sense of Cassatt’s process, how she captures a scene with a certain economy of line, and then whittles the scene down even further to the final painting.

I loved this series of paintings of women reading.

I also took in the Asian art exhibits. How intricate and practical many of the items were. It made me think of how skillfully beautiful every day objects were in centuries past. The amount of craftsmanship that it takes to paint a vase or carve figurines on a column is jaw dropping.

As an added bonus, I met up with a friend in Philadelphia whom I hadn’t seen in seven or eight years. We had both been baby stage managers together, learnin the trade from the same stage manager before going off to our respective careers. It was great to catch up and reflect on where life has taken us and what we’ve learned along the way.

-Watched some feel good rom coms – Finding You (struggling violinist goes to Ireland to find herself, meets cute movie star. Pretty Irish scenery, accents, Irish music, Vanessa Redgrave!) and About Fate (Girl needs a date for her sister’s wedding, coincidences throw a very nice boy in her way). Sweet and predictable and just what I wanted. Though, About Fate really annoyed me because it had the trope of sweet and capable guy meeting failure to launch girl. I get annoyed when protagonists are terrible at adulting. I mean a little bit of struggle is fine, but when they’re just incompetent at being decent humans I just feel uninvested in them getting a happy ending.

-Read. I finished three books and made good progress in two others, including I Capture the Castle for Cool Blogger’s Book Club. I might even get this weeks reading assignment done on time!

-Laundry lots of laundry. I had thought to get some other decluttering projects done, but that didn’t happen. I did purge a bunch of paper, though. The 7 year old insists on keeping every scarp of paper that comes home from school, so I took this opportunity to weed that out a little bit. I’m a little disappointed in myself to not declutter more, but on the other hand, we are at laundry basket zero, which never happens. Just in time for the rest of the family to come back with four days worth of laundry.

-Baked brownies. This recipe. It’s a super fudgy brownie, maybe too fudgy for my tastes. I have to say, my perfect brownie is the Ghirardelli mix from Costco. Maybe I should stop trying to find a perfect “from scratch” brownie recipe and just accept that what I want is the Ghirardelli. I also made peach muffins, since I picked up three boxes of peaches from this weekend’s Peach Truck run, the last of the season.

-Went on a hike with a friend K and her friend W. (I’ve managed to get a hike and a museum in this month after all!). We went on a short hike up to a spectacular view of the Potomac River and sat among rocks and talked about life while birds swooped around us. It’s so nice to talk with people who offer thoughtful conversation. I totally have a girl crush on W now and want to hang out with her again.

Afterwards we went to the nearby cute small town, got refreshing beverages – mine was a Sakura Lychee drink – and had lunch. What a nice ladies’ afternoon.

– Had my closing performance on Saturday. How I will miss this show. I like to make a list of the indelible moments of shows that I work on – live performance is so ephemeral and I think it is sometimes easy to let the experience flit away. Yet, I don’t want to take for granted how lucky I am to be part of a creative process, so even while running around backstage and checking props and people, I want to make sure I take time to savor moments, these singular fleeting moments that is live theatre. So here are some from this show:
– The tenor singing to the body of his dead brother, as he cradles it. Breaks my heart every night. Actually everything this singer does.
-The baritone who sings the priest, with his beautiful velvet voice. Wrap me in his voice forever, please.
-The baritone, who always shows me his handkerchief before he goes onstage because he knows I will ask to make sure he has it. (Because it would make for an awkward truce scene if he goes onstage without his white handkerchief)
-The bag pipes. Did I mention there are bagpipes in this show? How awesome is that? Definitely one to savor because how often will I get to hear bagpipes in such close proximity.
-The harp, which is directly behind me for most of the show. The harp part in this show is so delicate yet steady, each pluck of the strings resonates in me.
-The Sleep Chorus, a moment in the first act when the soldiers are singing about how they long for sleep and home. So beautiful it gives me chills every night.
-The percussion, timpani, and brass section, also behind me – those moments where they play so loud that I cover my ears yet still can feel the music through my soles, vibrating the floor.
-The baritone (there are a lot of baritones in this show) who plays the Aide-de-campe – his thoughtful, endearing, funny performance while he juggles a million props, and his ad libs in French. (That section on prop table with the white crate- that’s all him.)
-The insanity of the battle sequence, the backstage traffic of which felt like utter chaos until the third performance, when suddenly, magically, it began to run like clockwork and we could all just pretend that it’s utter chaos.
All in all I loved the past six weeks working on this show – one of the top career highlights, I would say.

Other Fun things this week:
-I make “clean out the produce drawer” muffins. I found this muffin recipe, and it seemed pretty versatile, so I looked in my produce drawer and found lots of languishing produce to put into a muffin. I added – apples, pears (that I had forgotten/didn’t realize we had), two wrinkled beets, a huge pattypan squash that had been given to use by our neighbors, but which confounded me so has been languishing in the produce drawer. I might have also added carrots too, but I can’t keep track. I reduced the sugar and used whole wheat flour. I think they turned out great. They were moist and just the right sweetness. The kids were decidedly lukewarm – no raves, but they did each eat several muffins so they couldn’t have been that bad. It was so satisfying to finally find a use for those two sad wrinkled beets in our produce fridge.

-Going to the park with the 7 year old to read. He didn’t have camp this week since it’s a lighter week for me, and he said he wanted to sit outside and read, so we brought our books to the park and read on a park bench together. He’s reading one of the Wings of Fire graphic novels. I’m reading I Capture the Castle.

-Going shoe shopping and school supply shopping. It was tax-free week in Maryland, so I figured it was a good week to get things done. The 12 year old didn’t have a school supply list, per se. I asked her what school supplies she needed and shed said, “I don’t need school supplies, I just use the Chromebook.” Well that made me a little sad. We bought her a binder and some paper and pencils and folders anyway. And then the two little kids got new shoes. They wanted the exact same shoes as they had last year, so that made for a quick and easy trip to the shoe store!

-Making lemonade. I’ve been craving lemonade lately, so I bought a bag of lemons and the 12 year old and I made mint lemonade base one afternoon. Perfect for drinking mixed with fizzy water. I had so much lemonade base that I stuck some in the blender with some strawberries that were a touch past their prime and poured the result into popsicle molds, making strawberry lemonade popsicles.

-When the kids steal my phone and take group selfies when I’m not looking. I get annoyed that they take my phone, but who can stay irked forever at these faces:

Reflections and Aspirations: I finally had a moment to write down my July reflections and August Aspirations. Why do I always seem to get to this when the month is already half over? Anyhow, here they are:
July 2024 Highlights:
-Writing guest blog posts for Elisabeth and Engie. So flattered to have been asked. Those posts were so fun to write.
-Swim Team Season. Summer Swim Team is exhausting, but I loved watching the 12 year old swim and seeing her have fun being on swim team. Also the 7 year old sort of figuring out how to swim. And taking showers on his own. Those felt like milestones.
– Going skating and duckpin bowling with the family. Small adventures.
-The 12 year old going to NYC with her theatre camp and her end of camp showcase.
– Watching the Olympics.
-Getting a new haircut. Also well woman exam, and mammogram. Still have not scheduled that eye appointment yet.
-Visit from my cousin and her daughter. So good to see them and hang out.

July Lowlights:
-The oppressively hot weather. Ick. So much ick. It made me not want to run or leave the house or do anything.
-The circus that is American politics. I try not to let the news get to me, but July 2024 was a lot and it made me just feel so angry and annoyed.
-Having to manage three drop offs and pick ups since all three kids were at different camps/schools. I felt like our mornings were a constant scramble. The moment we got in the car, someone would always ask, “Are we late?” and the answer was always, “No one is on time until Mom is on time to work.”
-Some hard parenting moments. Makes me want to throw up my hands and give up some days. When does it become less of a struggle to get kids to be responsible humans?

August Aspirations:
LIFE/FAMILY/FUN:
-Start school! Buy school supplies [DONE!], double check if the kids need any new clothes.
-Activity sign ups for the fall. I think I know what these are – pretty much the same as last year, but I just have to spend a few hours at my computer and knock it all out. (I’m really thankful that these things can be done online now. I think when I was a child it all involved postage and physical forms and writing checks. Some activities I still write checks for, though.)
– Planning a trip for the long weekend in September where there is no school. Perhaps. Need to really think about this and book things.
-Plan the Malaysia leg of our Asia trip. This has been on the list for several months now, but I think it really needs to be done this month or next.
-Renaissance Faire!!! Figure out when to go.
-Plan birthday party for 4 year old in September.

HOME:
-Window treatments (Still.) Make an appointment with the company that my friend recommended for them to come out and do a consult.
-Declutter one area. Desk? Sewing corner? Pantry?
-Get rid of my car. (Still.)
-Get the front door painted. Choose a paint colour. Paint colours are hard – I thought I’d make it easy on myself and only give myself two options, but what looks good in the morning always looks meh at night and vice versa. So which do I pick?

On the left – No more Drama. on the right, Morocco Red. Which would you pick for a front door?

ME/SOCIAL/FUN:
– Mom’s group lunch (already planned)
-Seeing my friend K. (Already did this)
-Mom and aunt’s visit. Reminder to myself to not revert to teen bratty-ness with my mom.
– Eye Doctor Appointment.
-Paint more pictures. For the sake of having a concrete goal: paint and send two cards.
-Do the NYTimes 9 minute strength workout at least four times a week.
-recommit to journaling daily.
-buy a new purse. My purse is literally in tatters. I’ve been thinking of this one from Quince, or this Sportsac one? I’ve usually had Sportsac purses, but my last one was a little on the small size, so I could stand to get something a little bigger.

WORK:
-Titles for September vocal recital.
-Update stage management handbook for work. (This can spill over into September)
-Finish/archive paperwork from my summer show.

Some of these will probably rollover to be September Aspirations, though, given that it’s almost the end of August.

Grateful for:
-Cooler weather. The weather has been glorious this week! The muggy humidity has left the air, the heat is not as oppressive as it has been, and there is a breeze in the air.

-Getting to dog sit. Every so often, I think, “Maybe I want a dog.” Then I think, “No, actually I don’t think I can fit that in my life.” So I’m grateful when my friends go out of town and I get to dog sit this cutie for them:

A couple weeks with Max is the perfect amount of time to scratch my dog itch (while I scratch his), and make me realize, that I don’t really want a dog 24/7. But I have been enjoying long walks and doggie snuggles and licks these past few weeks.

-My uterus is fine. Or more specifically my uteri are fine. This week started with an ultrasound that involved squirting water into my uterus to get a better look at things. Fun times. No, not at all – it was deeply uncomfortable. But in the spirit of “let’s all acknowledge how different yet normal everyone’s body is”, I’m reporting it here. So I’d been having really wacked periods – like unending light bleeding for months and then really long (like 3 week long) periods, and then weeks of nothing. At my last well woman visit, my doctor said, let’s check that out. When I was pregnant with my first kid, they thought I had a fibroid that was pushing the fetus and would interfere with a vaginal birth. So I had a c-section with her. (A whole other story – maybe I’ll write it here some day.) Then somewhere along the way they said, you have two uteruses. (I think this was after my second miscarriage after that first kid, it came up when they were trying to figure out why the miscarriages.) Anyhow, we tucked that information somewhere and people seemed generally unconcerned because I got pregnant again. I had two more kids, managed to VBAC them (because the babies seemed like they weren’t going to wait for that scheduled c-section.) Then went on with life and maybe still having a fibroid and two uteri, but not really doing anything about it. So fast forward to a couple weeks ago – odd periods, let’s get that checked out, vaginal ultrasound, squirt with water. Guess what? No fibroid! Yay! Just two perfectly healthy uteri. (And just one cervix. The real term they used bicornuate uterus – it’s pretty normal, though rare.) The inconsistent periods? “Well,” my doctor said, “Your uterus is fine, so it’s just you being in your mid forties. I can put you on hormones or birth control pills if you want to try to regulate your periods more.” I don’t really need another thing to keep track of, so I said, “Thank you, but I’ll just make sure to always travel with a back-up pad in my purse.” So that is the story of my uteri. After years of thinking I had a fibroid that I would have to deal with, it’s a huge relief to know that I don’t. Also grateful for my gynecologist because she is pretty awesome and I hope she never retires.

Looking Forward To:
– More peaches from the peach truck! I got three boxes this time since last time I got two and the kids went through them in four days.

-The last week before school starts. I’m contemplating taking the kids camping this coming week. On the one hand, I haven’t been camping yet this summer and could really use the extended time in nature. On the other hand, it seems a lot to cram into the last week before school starts, and maybe I want a more low-key week. We’ll see.

-Time with friends – I have a visit with a friend planned and also lunch with my mom’s group this coming week. Sometimes I feel like there isn’t a lot of interest from the moms in my mom’s group to get together, but I figure I don’t actually like hanging out in big groups, so even if it’s just one or two people coming to lunch, that feels pretty satisfying and makes it worth asking if anyone wants to gather.

What We Ate – I’m not feeling great about our dinner game these past few weeks. There hasn’t been a lot of meal planning, and I’ve just been eating whatever I can scrounge up or throw together. But at least, I’m eating down the fridge…:
Saturday: Pizza leftovers and Newsies (The proshot of the Broadway musical. Loved the dance numbers, the new musical numbers were pretty meh, though. Not sure if I feel the urge to see this in the theatre.)

Sunday: Pizza leftovers (again.)

Monday: Pork and Eggplant stir fry, eaten with noodles.

Tuesday: Salmon and potatoes, cooked on the grill. On the side we had cut up veggies, and I also made a pico de gallo and a mango salsa to eat with the salmon.

Wednesday: Chicken salad sandwiches

Thursday: The family was gone. I had dinner out with friends. I had a tomato, corn, burrata salad with shrimp and French fries.

Friday: Family still gone. I had congee with kimchi and two fried eggs.

Saturday: I had a late lunch, so I didn’t have dinner. When I got home after my show, I had left over Peruvian chicken with black beans, rice, plantains and the leftover salsa from Tuesday.

How is your August going? Is your summer winding down too?

Weekly recap + what we ate: Weekend alone and Olympic watching

It’s August! I guess we’re rounding the finish line of summer. Friday was my day off before tech week when we move into the theatre. I’m trying to have a combination of production and relaxing with the free day. So to that end, I:
-dropped one kid off at camp and one off at daycare (along with a blender because it’s smoothie Friday.) (The morning was actually kind of a shit show – the Husband had taken the kids to a live Wait! Wait! Don’t Tell Me! show the night before – a bucket list item for him – and they didn’t get back until 11pm, so of course they were holy terrors in the morning because they were over-tired. But they all had a lot of fun at the show, so I do feel like a little morning crankiness is worth it.)
– had a mammogram and a thyroid ultrasound (this latter to try to figure out why I’m having very light non-ending periods)
-dropped off a box of poop at the UPS store
-picked up a library hold
-mowed the lawn.

This last one almost defeated me – it was 90+ degrees out there. I put on my rash guard to mow because the sun’s rays were beaming something fierce.

Then, to reward myself, I did this:

Black raspberry chocolate gelato and Men’s trampoline. And a mountain of laundry.

Relaxed on the couch eating ice cream for lunch, while talking to my sister-in-law, watching the Olympics, and folding laundry. We’re dog sitting for the next week and there was a cute dog joining me in a few minutes to watch the Men’s Badminton Quarter Finals. I do need to do some meal planning since the next couple of days will be tech, and there is no tech friendly food in the fridge right now.

In the evening, we went to the pool after pick up. We haven’t been since swim team ended almost two weeks ago. Going to the pool on such a hot day was lovely. Also – our pool tends to be pretty empty on Friday nights because so many families at our pool go home for Shabbat dinner, so it wasn’t as much of a zoo as it usually is. Then it was home for Pizza and Glee.

Okay – things this week. Let’s back up to the poop shipment. As much as I want to be in the Cool Blogger Colonoscopy club, when my doctor offered me the option of “pooping in a box” (literally her words) colon cancer screening, I said, “Sign me up!” A few days later, a box appeared in the mail. Basically you poop into a plastic bucket, swab your poop, pour a preservative over it, close the bucket back up, and then ship everything to a lab where they will screen it. It’s not as accurate as a colonoscopy, but for low risk people, my doctor said it’s a more appealing alternative. It felt really weird to hand a box with my poop in it to the guy at the UPS store, but maybe we just need to be less squeamish as a society about these things. Also – the test is only good for three years, so who knows, maybe in three years I will do the full on colonoscopy?

I hope this box doens’t get lost in the mail…

Last weekend, I enjoyed my family-free time. Well, it was really only one day because Sunday I had to work. But on Saturday, I slept, read, did laundry. I ran errands. I picked up peaches from The Peach Truck:

I used to go peach picking, but then I realized that peach season here always falls on the the hottest month of the year. Plus, the peaches are not any cheaper if I pick them myself. So I started just buying them at the Farmers Market. I had heard about the Peach Truck, a company that brings peaches from the south to our area. My friend was going to go in on buying Peach Truck peaches with me, but then she went away on vacation, and yet I still impulsively ordered 2 boxes of peaches anyway. That’s 24 lbs of peaches (there was a discount if you bought more than one box.) Which at first, I thought was a bonkers amount of peaches and when I brought it home I worried that I had had a terrible idea. t was a great idea. I took about ten to work, but other than, that the kids and I have finished almost all 24 lbs. of peaches in a week. The next Peach Truck delivery is in two weeks. Maybe I’ll order THREE boxes? So much easier to get my peach fix this way than actually going to pick them.

Saturday afternoon, my friend K and I went to Glenstone Museum – We couldn’t get tickets to the exhibits, but we were able to get tickets to the grounds, and they had special Summer hours so were open until 8pm. We took the outdoor sculpture tour:

Then we had lunch on the patio, and wandered the grounds some more. I think it actually turned out fine that we didn’t get to go to the galleries – I’ve been to Glenstone three or four times and I always get sucked into the galleries and then run out of time to walk the grounds.

Afterwards, we went to a Cuban restaurant for dessert. We ended up hanging out for six hours – which was a lovely time.

-I’ve been watching the Olympics, like most people. Of course I’ve been watching swimming and gymnastics, but I’ve also been really into table tennis and badminton. Fun fact, I played varsity doubles badminton in high school and I was texting with my high school friend who played varsity singles on how cool it was to watch Olympic badminton. (Also – side note – I’ve always said bad-MIN-ton, but I’ve also heard people say ba-Mitten. Which do you say?) One evening, I wanted to paint a card for my friend who had to put her cat to sleep, and I found watching table tennis and badminton a nice soothing activity to do while I painted.

The finished card:

Random Olympic Thoughts:
-One thing I like about table tennis is that the athletes look so .. average. They are all sorts of ages and varying degrees of body types. They look like they could be IT consultants. Regardless, though, they all have this athletic glow that just makes everyone look so attractive. What is it about athletes that makes them all look so shiny and pretty?
– On a similar note most of these people must have regular lives and jobs and things like that, right? How wild is it to be an Olympic athlete and also an mechanical engineer or something.
-I was watching the sailing and a lot of the competitors are in their early 20s. How does one become an Olympic sailor at such a young age? That’s not a cheap sport. I’m kind of fascinated by the economic pathways of being an Olympic athlete. And just their pathways in general. Some of these sports are so very niche.
-It wasn’t until I watched the replays of entire competitions (as opposed to just the highlights) that I appreciated how much time is spent just … waiting. The sailing race, there is a countdown clock until the start of the race and the first race I watched, the start was delayed 30 minutes. Then it was finally time to get started so everyone started working their way to the start line. There’s a countdown clock, tension is building. And then 30 seconds before the start – another delay because the wind wasn’t blowing the right way. And there was another 30 minute delay. Can you imagine, getting lined up to start and then with 30 seconds until you can take off, a delay is called. Back to waiting. So much waiting. I think you have to be really mentally tough to be able to wait like that and still perform.
-Apparently handball is the one sport without Americans competing. It made me want to watch handball. It looks like a really fun game.
-I loved this article in the NYTimes about how table tennis players get no respect. No, You Can’t Beat an Olympic Table Tennis Player.
-What’s with all those AI commercials? It makes me feel like something is really off with the world when people don’t want to summarize their own to do lists or write fan letters without help. Or maybe I’m just an old fuddy duddy.
-I love how they start each competition with the three knocks of a stick, usually by a former Olympian. The three knocks is a French theatre tradition. I wish we would do that at theatres here in the U.S. Much better than playing the “Welcome to the show. Please turn off your cell phones” announcement that is so prevalent.
-This list in McSweeney’s “Olympic Gymnast or Me, a Middle Age Woman?” Made me laugh so hard. Especially #7 and #15.

Grateful For:
-A strong downbeat. This is one of those in the weeds work things, but … the show I’m currently working on – there are parts of the score where it’s hard to follow the written music. The melody crosses bar lines, and the rhythms are not what one would expect, and the piano reduction of the orchestra is sinewy. I find it easy to get lost if I blink. BUT… our conductor has a really strong downbeat. For those who don’t read music/follow conductors – conductors move their hands in a certain patterns which correspond the to the number of beats in a bar. A downward stroke is the first beat of a meaure. When I get lost – particularly in large orchestral passages, if I watch for the downbeat, I can usually find my place in the music. Not all conductors have good downbeats. Some conduct as if they are stirring a pot of soup. This conductor has a clear and strong downbeat. Thank goodness. There are many many places in this show where if I try to follow the notes, I’ll get lost. So I just count the downbeats. This is an example – you’ll see, I have an entrance cue marked, and I just number the measures until that entrance.

When I cue this entrance, I don’t look at the music, I just look at the conductor and count the number of times he makes that downward stroke. On the 8th downbeat, I send the singer. This conductor’s downbeat has been my saving grace many times in this opera.

-Reciprocal library privileges. I have a D.C. library card, which I also use for the Montgomery County, MD libraries since that is where I now live. Last week, I realized that close to my work is a library in the Fairfax County, VA system. I looked them up, and they have reciprocal library privileges with Montgomery County and D.C. So on my dinner break one day, I went and got a library card for the Fairfax County system. I know that I won’t likely borrow physical books from a Fairfax County library, but now I have an additional library to use on my Libby account. (For the record, I already had four libraries on my Libby account – Washington D.C Public Library, Montgomery County, MD, Maryland/Baltimore, and Los Angles County, where I grew up. Is this excessive????) One thing I found exciting about this new library is that you can borrow jigsaw puzzles. I thought that was pretty cool.

-Shade on hot hot hot hot days. Even though I’ve brought my running clothes to work, it’s been much too hot for me to go running on my dinner break, so I’ve just gone on a few walks instead.

-A new door! Our old door was old and drafty and sometimes wouldn’t open. I had dragged my feet on getting a new door because I loved my old door so much – it was red and had all sorts of lovely details in the hardware, and three elegant windows. So the Husband found a company that said it could just transfer the windows and the hardware from the old door to new door, as well as the lock so we wouldn’t have to re-key the door. The new door looks like this right now, but we are going to paint it. It wasn’t cheap, but I feel like we’re going to be in this house for a long time, so it’s okay to have a door I love.

-That I get to work on the show I’m working on. I love the show so so so much. It’s such a beautiful show. At least once a day, I have to tell myself not to cry in rehearsal. Crying in a good “this scene is so devastatingly beautiful and the music makes me feel like my heart is getting all the feelings squeezed out of it” kind of way.

Looking Forward to:
-Not having a different drop off/ pick up routine every week. I guess it’s my own fault for signing the kids up for five different camps over the course of six weeks. Luckily, this past week, the 12 year old could just walk to and from camp on her own. But it does feel like every week there was a new drop off/ pick up pattern to figure out. After this week of camp, we’ll be done with camp for the rest of the summer. Yay! The kids will be doing “mommy camp”. I read in an article one parent said their philosophy for these wide open summer days is that the kids have to do at least one thing for their mind and one thing for their body every day before they can have screens. I like that framework.

-Sewing classes starting in September for the 7 year old. And… guess what? They are offering Mommy and Me classes, so I signed up the 7 year old to take sewing classes with the Husband. I can’t wait to see what they make. I guess I need to start looking at activity sign ups for the fall soon.

-watching more Olympics. The next week will be pretty busy at work, so I’m glad that I can stream what I want when I get a minute. I don’t have any one sport I’m interested in – I just like to scroll through and find something I’ve never seen before.

-These books, picked up at the Library:

What We Ate: I ate a lot of dinners at work, and then grazed a bunch when I got home afterwards. The Husband did all the at home cooking this week.
Saturday: My Friend and I had dinner at the Glenstone patio cafe – we split a black bean quinoa salad and shrimp.

Sunday: Leftover pizza and Cobb Salad that the Husband brought home from their trip.

Monday: Eggplant pasta. The Husband cooked. This was really tasty – he sauteed eggplants and the cooked it in a tomato sauce and added lots of basil. Vegan.

Tuesday: Zucchini salad, eaten at work. The Husband made Zucchini boats at home for dinner. I had some when I got home and they were really tasty. He sauteed beef with seasonings, used that to fill hollowed out zucchini halves, tops with cheese and then bakes. It’s one of our easy go-to recipes where we can get the kids to eat vegetables.

Wednesday: Popcorn chicken and Taiwanese sausage from the Boba Tea place. I had brought something to eat for dinner since I had an evening rehearsal, but then decided that I wanted to treat myself a little. I think the kids had Mac n’ Cheese from the box at home.

Thursday: I worked through my official dinner break because we were getting ready for the final room run through. I don’t usually skip meal breaks, but I had meetings scheduled in the late afternoon. Anyhow, I managed to eat a yogurt and berries that I had packed. (The Husband and kids ate out before going to see Wait! Wait! Don’t Tell Me.)

Friday: Pizza (Take out) and Glee.

This weekend will be the start of tech week at work, so I’ll be at the theatre. Exiting, but it will also be exhausting. What are you up to this weekend?

Weekly recap + what we ate: big ticket items and small pleasures

Another full week, but not as packed as the week before, thank goodness- On Monday we started rehearsals for a my next show, and that evening I had my last titles gig of the season. I worked 5 evening during the week, so I’m feeling really behind on the home front. Laundry, general house picking up, spaces that need to be organized, the living room still needs curtains. I also still need to register the two older kids for summer camp and I’m starting to have a little bit of anxiety about that. And we still have to renew our pool membership for the summer.

And all of it is big ticket items. I think in my mind we got through the expensive part of the year with our spring break trip and I’m waiting for a less expensive month, but really it doesn’t come.

Some highlights of my week:
– Slowly getting back into running. I did one pre-rehearsal run and one dinner break run, both less than 1.5 miles, but it’s something. I attempted another run on Saturday on the dinner break. The weather looked iffy, but I thought I could beat the rain. I was wrong. About 3/4 of a mile out it started to sprinkle. Then it turned into a deluge. Like one of those “I stood under a restaurant awning for 10 minutes hoping it would pass but eventually gave up and ran the four blocks back to work” kind of deluge. I was quite the sad soddened mess. And the dumb thing is I didn’t check the weather before hand that day; the morning was gorgeous so I didn’t even bring a raincoat. wump wump.

– Balloons in rehearsal. There are balloons in rehearsal. Bright colourful balloons. I got to use the helium tank and blow them up. It made me happy. One of my co-workers offered to take them down to the rehearsal hall for me, and I was like, “No way! I blew them up, I want to carry them down the hallway!” Of course they were sad and droopy by the next day, but that’s okay.

– The voice recital that I did supertitles for. Most of the songs were new to me, but there were two I absolutely loved. The first is called A Soft Day. It’s by a English composer C.V. Stanford, based on a poem by Winifred Letts. The poem describes a day that is damp and quiet and full of nature.

A soft day, thank God!
A wind from the south
With a honeyed mouth;
A scent of drenching leaves,
Briar and beech and lime,
White elder-flower and thyme
And the soaking grass smells sweet,
Crushed by my two bare feet,
While the rain drips,
Drips, drips, drips from the eaves.

A soft day, thank God!
The hills wear a shroud
Of silver cloud;
The web the spider weaves
Is a glittering net;
The woodland path is wet,
And the soaking earth smells sweet
Under my two bare feet,
And the rain drips,
Drips, drips, drips from the leaves.

I love poems that are able to capture a moment so precisely in words that I can almost feel the misty air around me. The song setting of this poem has that same relaxed and pensive feeling to it. And the way the notes “drip” like the rain…

British contralto Kathleen Ferrier. Pianist Frederick Stone. Such elegant singing.

My second favorite song in the recital was a beautifully sweet lullaby by Puccini. Puccini wrote lots of operas, big, grand affairs. I guess he also wrote lots of songs too, and I thought this one, Sogno d’or (Golden Dreams) was lovely. In it a parents sings to a child about how the angels will come to them as they sleep. You can listen to it here.

Soprano Krassimira Stoyanova. I worked with her years ago – she was a lovely person. We managed to communicate despite her not speaking English and me not speaking Italian.

Sunday was my day off, and even though there is not skating lessons this week since it is between sessions, I still took the kids skating. Actually the whole family went, though the Husband only sat and watched. It’s been so fun to see the kids get more and more confident on their skates. The three year old can skate by herself now, even though she insists on holding my hand while we skate.

In the afternoon we went downtown to meet my cousin who was in town for work. One thing I like about living near D.C. is that people often come to town for work, so we get to see them. We met my cousin at the National Postal Museum, which is one of my favorite of all the Smithsonian Museums. They have lots of informative and interactive exhibits which I find appeals to both me and the kids. Kids can learn how to sort mail, and design their own stamps and collect stamps too.

After the Postal Museum we walked down to Chinatown and had dinner at Jaleo, a tapas restaurant that is quite well known here. We decided to order the shrimp and squid paella in addition to a variety of tapas. I’ve been to Jaleo several times, but never ordered the paella; I think in my mind, a dish that’s mostly rice sounds unexciting. Well. I was proven wrong. The paella was heavenly. We also ordered dessert and there was a rice pudding with a lemon cream. Rice pudding, also something that is a very pedestrian desert in my mind, but which was divine in this iteration. I might have to reconsider my prejudice against rice.

Something that makes me smile: my pen holder from Muji and my red pencil. Years ago a colleague introduced me to 0.9 lead and it’s been my lead thickness of choice ever since. Of course everyone at work now used 0.9 lead pencils and we were constantly mixing up pencils since the barbells were all the same color. Eventually I stuck a piece of tape on mine so I knew which one was mine. When I found that Amazon sells my favorite pencils in my favorite color red, and not only that, in packs of 12, I immediately got a box and now I always know which 0.9 lead pencil is mine.

The pen holder, I found of the Japanese houseware store Muji. I was always putting my pencil down and forgetting where it was. Now, I have this clip on my binder and my pencil – and the green Frixion pen that I use to mark entrances – live there and I always know where it is. That adage “A place for everything” – I feel like this pen clip embraces that for me, at least in this small area of life. It’s not just about my writing utensils’ location but about containment and security. It makes me happy and feels so satisfying knowing where to put my pencil after I jot a notes, and to be able to find it when I need it.

A link I loved: I always enjoy the New York Times “By the Book” column where they interview noted people about their favorite books, not so favorite books, reading habits, etc. This week’s column features Judy Blume, and it is excellent. I put a lot of the books she mentioned in my TBR list, and have already started Sherman Alexie’s The Absolutely True Diary of a Part-Time Indian and two chapters in it is already by turns hilarious and hesrtbreaking. I think of Judy Blume mostly as the author of “Superfudge”. I do remember reading “Are You There, God? It’s Me Margaret” but not really relating to it as much as I thought I would. Maybe it’s time for a re-read?

Grateful for:
– a morning walk with a friend. Several days I had afternoon and evening rehearsals, so I had the morning off. One morning, my friend from the bus stop asked if I wanted to go for a walk, so we did. The weather was nice, sunny, spring time weather. Afterwards we made plans to meet up at the park on Friday when the kids’ were off school. This friend is moving at the end of the summer – her husband is in the foreign service – and it makes me a sad that they are moving because I feel like I don’t make friends’ easily. I’m really glad she started talking to me at the bus stop one morning. They’ll be back in a couple years, though – I’ll just have to keep in touch.
– Having a car and being able to drive the kids to school. Another school bus related thing. One day, the morning school bus did not come at all. After half an hour of waiting, the parents who were at the stop took all the kids that were still waiting for the bus to school – whomever had a free seat in their car took a kid. I’m grateful that this is a community where this generosity is not weird and people are just willing to give another kid a ride to school without a second thought.
– Getting to listen to really talented people make music. For this show, I’m running the stage left side of stage. In rehearsal it means that from where I sit I get a prime view of the rehearsal pianist. I am in awe of how their hands dance over the keyboards, up and down, fast and slow. Sometimes they even sing the parts of the chorus or other characters who aren’t in rehearsal while their hands sprint across the notes. I try to find moments to savor every day and last week, many of those moments were watching the rehearsal pianists.

Looking forward to:
– Finalizing summer camp plans. As in looking forward to it being done, much the same way I was looking forward to our taxes being done.

– Happy Hour with moms from my mom’s group.

– reading this book. I love a good Jane Austen retelling and this one is proving pretty fun and thoughtful.

What we ate: (a lot more eating out than normal this week. I feel like we’re kind of in a meal planning slump)

Monday- I had my titles gig so I got take out from Beefsteak – tofu kimchi bowl. I am not sure what everyone else ate.

Tuesday- Pasta salad with the leftover grilled veggies from the Sunday before. vegan. I was working, so I made this in the morning before I went to work.

Wednesday – The Family had take out wings to celebrate a good report card. I was at work and brought leftover pasta salad.

Thursday – vegetarian tortilla soup in the Instant Pot. From this recipe from Two Sleevers website (aka the Butter Chicken Lady). Made in the morning before I went to work.

Friday – The Husband took the kids out to eat because they were off school and the 11 year old had a basketball game upcountry. I probably lay had leftovers.

Saturday- Pizza and movie night. The family watched Might Ducks. I went out for a drink with colleagues after work and missed the movie.

Sunday – Jaleo with my cousin.

Weekend – Solo Saturday

The Husband went out of town on Saturday for a friend’s birthday party, which I was so excited about because he never takes time for himself and he has been on solo parent duty for most of the past eight weeks. So I had an entire day with the kids to myself. The plan was to keep us out of the house as much as possible.

So on Saturday, we:
– Got bathing suits and kickboards. I’ve been trying to order bathing suits off Amazon for the ten year old, but none of them have fit and it’s been a frustrating, unending process. Then one day I noticed that there is a small swimwear store located near us so on Saturday, we popped in. She tried on a bunch of bathing suits and found two that fit. Hooray! I also bought kick boards (we called these flutter boards when I was growing up) for the two little kids. I’m so glad I found this store – every summer we try to buy goggles at the big chain sporting good store, but they are always out of the right size. Next summer I’m just going to come to our small local swim store.

– Then we went to a park and met up with some friends for food trucks, music, and beer. The kids played in the playground while I got to catch up with the grown ups.

– Then we hopped on the Metro and went to the Building Museum for The Big Build Day. Big Build day is kind of an open house where the Museum is free for the day and they have all sorts of building related activities for kids. The place was kind of a zoo and very crowded, but we got to do some fun things like sit in big trucks and use power tools.

– Then we Metroed back to our car, came home and had snack dinner while watching The Thundermans. Well, the kids watched The Thundermans while I read my book, which made for a very pleasant evening.

Then the kids went to bed and I stayed up late to clean while watching Miss Fisher’s Modern Murder Mysteries, which I’m finding fun, but not as good as the original series. I had thought to go to bed early to take advantage of the end of Daylight Savings, but … bedtime is still my nemesis and I stayed up several hours past midnight. I did set all the clocks back before I went to bed, so I would have the illusion of getting up earlier.

This morning started off with the baby crawling into bed to cuddle, then around 5am, she starts yelling at me, “Breakfast! Breakfast! Breakfast!!!!” She clearly did not understand the idea of falling back an hour. I turned over in bed and she eventually got out of bed and left the room. I’m not sure what happened next with the kids, but when I woke up two hours later, the kids were in the basement watching High School Musical: The Musical: The Series. As annoyed as I was that they were watching TV without permission, I guess I should be glad that they were quiet and occupied and didn’t burn the house down while I slept.

Anyhow I got up, we got on with our morning, and even managed an hour of cleaning the toy room before I had to go to work. Getting the toy room cleaned was a minor miracle. I had been starting to stress out about how messy the house was – hence the post midnight cleaning session last night. Previous attempts this weekend to get the kids to clean involved yelling, foot stomping and much exasperation in the face of their apathy towards the state of the house. Eventually I left it and this morning I decided to try again. After much infuriating resistance, I took a breath and asked the five year old why he didn’t like picking up and he says, “Because it is boring.”

Well he’s not wrong there. I always entice myself to clean by watching something while I did it; I only let myself watch Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries while cleaning. So I said to the kids, “What if I let you listen to some favorite music while you clean?” This was eagerly accepted. So I put on some Hamilton and then some Taylor Swift and we set the toy room in order. Music while cleaning is not a new or novel concept in our house, but I always forget that it’s a great inducement. Part of me thinks, “They should just pick up because I’m asking them!” That’s hardly fair to them, though. If I can’t expect myself to clean up without some music or tv show, I can hardly expect them to.

In the end, the kids did not all clean equally – the ten year old did more than her fair share, but everyone did something. It wasn’t painless, but it got done. I do feel as if we have too many toys and bits and bobs, but I don’t know where to even begin the process of weeding it all down. Part of the issue is, even if the oldest kid has outgrown something, I feel like I have to hold on to it for the sake of the little ones. I need to figure out how to cull the toy room before Christmas, though.

So we cleaned then the sitter came, I took the ten year old to swim clinic and went to work. After work, I did a grocery run for tomorrow’s camping trip then came home and the Husband had returned from his trip to New York, bearing the fattest, doughiest, bagels I had ever seen. And the Giant was out of Philadelphia cream cheese, which is a minor annoyance, but seemed large in the moment. So we had an evening as a family – one of those noisy evenings where we are all exhausted, but the kids chatter endlessly and jump all over us, but being inert on the couch is a perfectly fine response. I still haven’t made campsite reservations or pulled out the camping gear, but I think it will be fine. I looked at the website and there are still lots of camp sites open. I’ll push publish then go finish packing before I turn in for the night. It feels like a lot of work for one night of camping, but this might be the last warm spell for a while and there is still a bit of fall colour to enjoy, so while I waffled on whether or not to go camping, I think we will have a good time.

So all in all a good weekend – twenty four hours solo with the kids. The house was kind of a sty, but we managed to ameliorate that somewhat. I have decided that these one off days when I’m solo parenting, the goals are: sleep, food, family harmony, and fun. Cleaning the house is clearly not a priority.

Weekly recap + what we ate: Authenticity and THREE!!!

Glenstone Museum. One of this week’s bright spots.

This week was one of those “between jobs” weeks.

I did not knock out as much of my “To do” list as I wanted – partly because the week after a gig is always a slow re-entry for me, partly too because my cousin came to visit. I do want to be better at picking up life after I’m done a gig. Too often, the aftermath of a gig feels like … well, you know that scene in the Drew Barrymore Cinderella movie Ever After (such a good movie!!!) when Drew is supposed to meet the Prince, but she’s in her servant clothes so she races back to the house, goes in through the back door, and then emerges out of the front door in a gorgeous gown and pearl circlet, just in time to meet the Prince, and then the shot changes to behind the front door, where the servants are collapsed on the floor in exhaustion from having transformed her so quickly….

Yeah, aftermath of a job feels like the servants on the ground in a heap. I’ve spent so much time keeping the job related parts of life afloat, that the non-job parts of life, the parts that actually allow me to function, get somewhat neglected and left in a heap (by me, not by the Husband… he does a magnificent job of holding down the fort!). And when the gig is over, I have to pull the servants up off the floor and put everything back in order, but it takes a while for me to get in the right headspace for it. I fully realize it’s a privilege not to have to figure out how to balance work and life all fifty-two weeks of the year – big props to people who do it – so I want to get better at tackling the life stuff efficiently when I don’t have work stuff on my plate.

I’m pretty good at doing the things I want to do but don’t really get to do when I’m working – I went running three times, had lunch with a friend, made muffins, got to write in this space. It’s the life admin stuff that I struggle to find the discipline to attack – laundry, big organizational projects, paperwork that needs to be done – the adulting stuff, I guess. And now I’m about to go back to work and some of it still looms. I might just have to dedicate time for it when I am working so it doesn’t pile up for when I’m not working on a show.

Some thoughts and things this week:

– The ten year old has started piano lessons again, after a break for much of August. Her lessons are at 7:15am and I particularly notice the shifting of the seasonal light on those mornings when I take her (and the other kids) to these early morning lessons. We’ve passed into the season when the sun is just starting to rise as we pack into the car, and this week, at a stop light, I glanced into the side view mirror and couldn’t resist taking a picture of sunrise behind me. Even though the traffic ahead of me sat in misty morning grey, the cars behind me were bathed in a golden red glow. Soon, I know, it will still be quite dark when we go to piano lessons, but it was a good reminder to savor the beautiful golden moments when I can.

– I’ve been listening to the podcast Under the Influence with Jo Piazza. (Not to be confused, now that I’ve Googled it, with Under the Influence from the CBC with Tim O’Reilly, which also looks interesting).

It’s a series that takes a look at the world of social media influencers, particularly mothers. I’m only six episodes in, and it’s been fascinating and though provoking. Even though I have social media accounts, I had to quit them cold turkey a few years ago because they had become a time suck and just made me feel bad about my life and career. Still, the idea of being able to make a living through gathering a social media following is really intriguing. The podcast really dissects the cultural implications of how women, who would otherwise be home-makers or stay-at-home mothers – that is to say unpaid labour – have parlayed domestic life with children into a commodity that they can be paid for. The episode on Authenticity, particularly was pretty engrossing, and made me think about how the term “authentic” is often bandied around when describing influencers.
Being authentic is valued. But so is being happy and shiny. Yet there is this paradox where when one only posts happy and shiny content, one is labelled as not authentic. I don’t think not posting the rough and hard and ugly parts of life makes a person less authentic. There is something, to me, inauthentic about reaching for a camera and generating content when your child is having a meltdown, rather than putting your camera down and comforting that child. The hard moments aren’t splashed across the happy shiny Instagram, perhaps because people are trying to navigate them rather than share them. I’m all for sharing hard moments – and I really appreciate it when people are brave enough to share them – but I don’t think sharing the hard moments makes a certain person or post more “authentic” than any other. The thing is, any one social media posts can lack context and doesn’t really reflect anything beyond that moment. Even look at our annual Christmas card – I pick the cutest picture of my kids to send to people. Am I being inauthentic because I don’t also include a picture of me washing up a poop accident? It seems like demanding authenticity just sets people – women – up for failure.
They make an interesting point on the podcast about how Hillary Clinton was mocked for wearing a scrunchie when that was probably the most true to herself thing that she could wear. While Obama or Trump or any man could probably wake up, take a shower, put on a suit and be ready for a press conference in thirty minutes, Clinton probably has to go through an hour or so of hair an make-up before appearing in public. The degree to which we demand authenticity from women yet at the same time shame her if she doesn’t put on a face, really speaks to a double standard.
The conversations on the podcast also has made me think of how I present on this little corner of the internet. I don’t want to be an influencer by any means, and it’s made me realize that while I’m grateful for the handful of people who read, I really just want to write what I want to write and brain dump the things that are interesting to me. Like this podcast, which I highly recommend.

– My mother also came to visit while my cousin was here and I managed to get tickets to the Glenstone Museum, a private museum that specializes in contemporary art, mostly installation pieces from Post WWII. A big part of the collection are sculptures throughout it’s outdoor campus, which makes for a really wonderful afternoon of meandering through trails and sitting and enjoying nature and art. The tickets are released on the first of each month are are usually booked three months out, so I was really surprised when I looked on the website earlier this week and saw that there were tickets available for later in the week. Another things I loved about the museum is they don’t have the usual placards in place giving information and thoughts about the pieces. Rather there are very knowledgeable docents who will talk to you about the artwork and the museum if you want, otherwise they leave you to contemplate the pieces for yourself. I sometimes find contemporary art hard to understand, and being able to talk to a docent and ask questions made the artwork so much more accessible. Definitely worth a trip back.

Koons. We ran out of time so didn’t make it all the way to this one.

The buildings and gardens are also works of art.

– This piece of advice from the blog Ask A Manager:

I sometimes run into this situation with interns and I admit I don’t always have the patience to be gracious about coaching someone through steps that they already have documented in paperwork. “What have you tried so far?” seems to me a great way to help distill where the trainee might be getting hung up, rather than me just telling them how to solve things.

– The big thing this week, was that the baby turned THREE!!! I’m feeling all the feels on this one. The night before her birthday, the Husband says to me, “This is our last day of ever having a two year old.” And it just about slayed me. It’s been hard, certainly, to know that she is our last baby. I love babies – the sweet, cuddly, exploratory, needs-to-be-protected, blind faith, little personalities – they are just such great companions. I’m excited to see who the baby grows up to be, but at the same time nervous because I know I can’t control that. But who she is right now is an adorable, mischievous, intrepid, dexterous, opportunistic, happy, clever, and cheeky little child. She’s the most independent of the three kids and finds such joy in everything around her. Having a baby as the world shut down was not something that I could ever had imagined happening, but she was certainly one of the bright marvels that helped keep things interesting.

skating last weekend. I used to think skate helpers were silly, but I realized that for her, keeping up with her siblings was more important than learning to skate properly. So skate helper it was.

What We Ate: I was home all week and all three dinners I cooked were vegan. We’ll see how it goes when I go back to work next week – I feel like vegan meals aren’t as easy to make ahead of time.

Saturday: I was working the evening show. I was running late to work, so I just shoved two half eaten meatball sandwiches from the night before into a container and ate them at my desk. I might have also had an apple.

Sunday: I was working a matinee, so I had bubbly water and cake for dinner at the reception following the performance.

Monday: Orange Cauliflower with Fried Tofu and Rice. The cauliflower recipe was from the Bad Manners Brave New World Cookbook and was their vegan take on orange chicken. Aside from being made from cauliflower rather than chicken, this was healthier because the cauliflower was baked, not fried. Of course then I fried the tofu to go with.

Tuesday: Tacos with meatless meaty filling from Bare Minimum Dinners, with cabbage mango slaw and avocados. I’m really liking Bare Minimum Dinners. There aren’t a lot of vegetarian recipes in it, but this meatless taco filling was pretty great. It’s a combination of mushrooms, walnuts, and pinto beans with the sauce from an adobo pepper in chipotle sauce. It was actually on the spicy side, so I just heated up a can of black beans with cumin and a clove of garlic for the two little kids

Wednesday: We went to meet a friend at a local Biergarten. They have the best wings – they smoke them then fry them so they are so full of flavor. I feel like this evening definitely offset all the vegan dinners we ate this week.

Thursday: Curry Udon Noodles with Teriyaki Jackfruit from Bad Manners Cookbook. This was my first attempt cooking with jackfruit, which I hear touted as a substitute for pork. My verdict – Jackfruit is pretty tasteless, so good sauce is needed. It did mimic the texture of fplled pork, though. But also, I added a bunch of mushrooms in with the Teriyaki sauce, and I think I would be just as happy to eat this dish with mushrooms instead of Jackfruit.

Friday: Pizza (made by The Husband) and movie – Minions: The Rise of Gru. This movie was pretty hilarious in parts, but kind of lost steam towards the end. (Or maybe we lost steam?) And then to round things out…. we had cake. I made a cake for the baby’s birthday and we zoomed the rest of the family to sing happy birthday. (Also sent some store bought cupcakes to school, because I guess this is the times right now where we can only send store bought treats. I understand the reasoning what with allergies and COVID, but it still makes me a little sad.) My cousin helped with the cake – we made this chocolate cake recipe with vanilla frosting and then sort of followed the instructions for a pinata cake. I don’t think the cake was high enough to have the desired effect of m&m spillage. But maybe it’s one of those things that’s only perfect on Instagram?

Weekly (bi-monthly?) recap: Summer so far

Well, we are coming off another long weekend and a positive COVID test for the Husband. Luckily, he isolated in the bedroom and the rest of the family managed to stay negative. I think the strategy was for the Husband to isolate in the bedroom, and for the rest of us to spend as little time at home as possible. The two older kids were in camp and pre-school, and the baby and I found lots of adventures to keep us out and about.

I have to admit, that I don’t mind solo parenting. There is something really freeing about realizing that there are no excuses for not prioritizing the well-being of the people in the family. I could let the house get messy and leave the dishes to be piled in the sink until after the kids went to bed and it was totally a fine to say time with the kids was more important that the dishes. To be sure, kids should probably trump dishes any day, but I think when I know the kids will get attention from another parent, it makes it easier to find the time to do the dishes and pick up the living room and fold the laundry. I will say, lest you think the Husband was a total invalid slug – he actually felt fine a few days after his positive test, and when the kids and I weren’t home, he would emerge to do things like go mow the lawn or pick up the mess I left in the kitchen. But even still, the house was a bit of a sty and I was soooo very tired from having to do housework after the kids went to bed. On the plus side, I finished season three of Miss Fisher’s Murder Mysteries. Or maybe that is a minus because that was the last season made and I have developed such a crush on Detective Inspector Jack Robinson and, truth be told, on Phyrne Fisher herself. That series was such a perfect slow burn romance. Okay, so another plus of solo parenting is that I get to watch whatever I want.

We did use up a lot of rapid COVID tests during the week. I remember when the county and the federal government first started handing out tests for free, we somehow ended up with ten test kits in our bathroom cabinet. “We’ll never get through this all!” I thought. Hah. Last week I actually had a slight panic that I would run out. I guess a family of five goes through test kits pretty quickly Luckily the county is still handing out test kits and the federal government has made more kits available – these latter arrived in the mail two or three days after I ordered them. Speedy!

At any rate, this fourth of July weekend has been low key. We cleaned out some of the attic, visited the Smithsonian (more on that below) and there was a birthday part and raft night at the pool, when people can bring their inflatables Then on July 4th itself, my friend Kristen came over and we went to the pool and then came home to grill (salmon, shrimp, mushrooms, sausages, corn, and an eggplant salad that I thought was really good). We capped off the evening by looking through old photo albums from college – Kristen and I had been roommates for all four years of college. The ten year old seemed to really get a kick out of this. She looked at pictures of me glowing with youth and said, “Now I understand why dad married you.” Thanks? I think?

It’s been a while since I wrote of our adventures -something about being exhausted from solo parenting and all the weighty world and national events this last half of June has made it difficult to prioritize writing. But at any rate – highlights of Summer so far:

-I did make it to a beach with the two little kids, packing a lunch and snacks and taking them to Calvert Cliffs State Park. It was an easy 1.8 mile hike from the parking lot to the beach, but that did not mean the hike was easy, just the terrain. With the two littles, it took us about 2 hours and lots of M&M breaks to go that 1.8 miles. At the end of the trail, we were rewarded with a sunny sandy shore and temperatures that made it a little too chilly to brave the waters, but perfect for soaking up sunshine, hunting for shark’s teeth and building sand castles. I was particularly excited to use the beach tent that I had bought last year, but which I had never gotten a chance to use yet. We stayed almost all day, and even though I was certain the littles would be tired after the hike back to the parking lot, they played for an hour on the recycled tire playground next to the parking lot. Which was fine by me – I lazed in a recycled tire hammock and read my book as the sun started to set.

-Riding the carousel. The ten year old’s theatre camp is in what was once an amusement park, but is now a park used for various arts and cultural programs. In fact, it’s at the park’s ballroom where the Husband and I met, one summer evening at a contradance. In the park, there is a carousel, originally installed in 1921. It’s $2 to ride and $5 for a day pass. One morning, after dropping the ten year old at camp, I bought the baby and I day passes and we spent several hours riding the carousel, taking pauses to go play at the playground next to it. I think we rode the carousel six times that morning. It was a great morning – the carousel music is courtesy of a Wurlitzer band organ, and hearing the familiar old tunes is one of my favorite parts of riding the carousel. They must have also at some point commissioned new music rolls for the band organ because one morning the band organ played such vintage hits as “The Boxer”, “One Tin Solider”, and “Love Potion No. 9.” There is something charming in hearing these modern hits coming from a band organ with it’s reedy pipes, bass drum, cymbals, and triangles. The simplicity of going around and around to the loud oom pah pahs, the velocity of the carousel creating just enough breeze to cut through the summer heat – this is summer as it is meant to be savored.

– The ten year old’s camp is also about a ten minute drive from a wonderful hike along the Potomac river. One day after camp, I took the baby. The trail winds through a nicely shaded route next to the Potomac, and at one point we came to some rocky out crops, great for a rocky scramble, which the baby is always up for. I am always amazed at her ability to climb rocks, fitting her small fingers in crevices and pulling herself up with the slightest purchase. We had a snack and enjoyed watching the river flow by. Hikes with the baby don’t always go far, but they are nonetheless full of wonder.

– Fizzy water and popsicles. At the beginning of June I took a weekend away with a good friend to Berkeley Springs, West Virginia. One of the things we discovered there was flavored balsamic vinegar used as a drink ingredient. I came home with some blackberry ginger balsamic and blood orange vanilla balsamic and the next day went to the store to stock up on fizzy water. Well after a week of that, I remembered that several years ago my brother had gifted me a SodaStream, which I had used little bit but never really got the hang of it so I put it in the attic. Inspired by my balsamic adventures, I pulled the SodaStream out of storage, bought a new Co2 cartridge, and now have fizzy water at the touch of a button. This makes me so happy. Also – summer also means popsicle season. The husband bought a new Mexican cookbook and there is a recipe in it for lime paletas. I have been making those weekly now, though sometimes I, in a fit of frugalness, throw in all the dried and sad citrus that has been languishing in the fruit bowl. So a fun realization is that the paleta base also makes a good lemonade base. And when mixed with fizzy water, makes a delightful summer drink. I feel so clever for getting two uses out of one recipe!

– Pool Time. The ten year old is on the swim team again, so we are spending a lot of time at the pool what with four practices and at least one meet a week. And then on weekends, the kids inevitably want to go to the pool. While the five year old is very cautious in the pool, the baby is fearless. She insists on wearing her brother’s swim vest rather than her more buoyant Puddle Jumper. The swim team parents have to volunteer to work the meets and I’ve been usually assigned to be a timer, which is kind of fun and exciting and my feet have been getting very wet. The ten year old and I have worked out a deal that every time she drops time without being disqualified, she gets and additional dollar for the snack bar. I’ve never really been one for bribing a kid to do well, but I do think that achievements should be celebrated.

– Anticipation. I read this article a couple weeks ago about how anticipation can help a person enjoy life more, and that having something to look forward to can boost one’s mood. The most interesting part of the article for me, though was this: “The flip side of positive anticipation,” the author writes, ” is anticipatory anxiety.” That is to say, a lot of things mix feelings of excitement and anxiety. “The key is acknowledging the happy, positive aspects of what you’re doing along with the nervous feelings,” the article goes on to say. I was thinking about this lately when the Husband and I were trying to plan some travel this summer. There is a lot of stress that goes along with planning a trip that sometimes all I can think about is, “Is it really going to be worth packing the kids in a van for a ten hour road trip?” or “Three kids + two adults + 1 tent = no sleep for anyone.” (except maybe the five year old. he sleeps like a rock.) But, I realize that if I thought about all that could be painful about a trip, I would never take the kids anywhere. So we do have some trips planned and I’m trying to persist in finding things that will be fun and interesting on this trip to get the Husband and I excited about going. I talk to people about our plans, read books, look at maps…. anything to get me to think of the trip as more than just a bundle of challenges and missteps. I’m sure there will be many of those, but surely there will also be some good moments too.

– The Smithsonian. I always feel so lucky that the Smithsonian Museums are just a 30-40 minute metro ride from home and that there are so many wonderful things to see there and it’s all free. It had been several years since I last went to the Smithsonian’s Folklife Festival – the past couple of years I’m not sure it was held due to COVID. So when I heard that this festival which celebrates cultural traditions was going to be going full swing again, I decided to take the baby and meet up with my friend Kristen to check it out. This year’s theme was the United Arab Emirates and Earth Optimism. We saw a Bedouin cooking demonstration, watched someone make fishing nets by hand, participated in an art project and relaxed on a majlis – a community sitting place, often for discussing cultural and political issues – set up in the shade of a tree. The art project was particularly interesting – the artist Azza Al Qubaisi gave each person a cross section of a palm stem to decorate, then she will take a picture and assemble them all digitally into a design. It was really neat – the baby’s effort was a little messy and chaotic, but when seen as part of a large whole, it didn’t look that bad. The artist’s goal is to collect 1000 palm sections, which I think was a pretty easy goal.

One weekend, after the Husband was done isolating, we took the metro downtown again, this time to check out an exhibit called Futures, which sought to collect artifacts that recalled how we thought of the future as well as objects that could give us a glimpse of today’s future. There were some really neat exhibits that really made me think about the idea of inclusion – a computer generated voice that was meant to be genderless, and a version of Minecraft that you could play with your eyes. And some machines that would make food production and transportation more efficient. It was all incredibly thought provoking to think about what I would want the future to look like, and what it might actually look like.

archway into Arts and Industry Building.

I also liked that throughout the exhibit there were quotes on the wall about how we can think about the future. My favorite:

And speaking of the unimaginable future – the best thing of all in June:

– The Husband’s positive COVID test coincided with the approval of the vaccine for kids 6 months to 5 years. The baby had been in a Pfizer trial and she had a 2 in 3 chance of getting the real vaccine, the other 1 in 3 being a placebo. The trial was to be unblinded in six months or when the vaccine was approved for her age group, whichever was sooner. Anyhow, the Monday after the vaccine was approved, I was driving the ten year old to camp, when I noticed I missed a call which turned out to be the folks from the study calling to unblind the baby. It took four days for them to call me back, and I was so impatiently on pins and needles to find out. Finally, I was running errands at Target one morning and the study folks called again. This time I was able to answer the phone, having left the ringer on since I first missed the call. Well turns out…. the baby received three doses of the vaccine, so she is now fully vaccinated! Whoo hoo! Until, that is, she needs a booster. I celebrate with a grain of sobriety, since the Husband, who is fully vaccinated managed to get COVID despite everything. But… it’s a layer of protection and I’m so glad that we are all vaccinated to some degree. I did have a feeling that she had the real vaccine because the 24 hours after the third shot, she was a tired, cranky lethargic mess and she usually is the happiest ball of energy. Interestingly, she had no side effects from the first two shots, however. The baby (okay, toddler) will go to pre-school in the fall, and I feel grateful that she will have had three doses of the vaccine. On the other hand, I’m really going to miss going on adventures with her. I’m already mourning the loss of my little buddy.

(Okay, funny toddler side note – For some reason, she thinks that every store is called Target. So whenever I mention buying something, she says, “Go buy from Target?” Even if it’s a car.)