The second pie is in the oven, so what am I to do while I wait, but send some hodge podge thoughts out into the world.
Also – I just checked the pie and 1) The edge of the crust is doing some kind of sad droopy thing – I had too much overhang and rather than trim it off, I thought I’d just leave it because really the crust is the best part, so why not have more. I had fluted the excess edge, but I think there was too much excess and it has kind of drooped like Dali’s clocks. It does not look good. But it will be tasty. and 2) I tried to peek to see if the rest of the crust was baking since soggy crust has been an issue of mine lately. And I thought, “That’s strange… why is the crust still so pale? It’s very white for having been in the oven for twenty minutes” And I panicked a little bit. But then I remembered that I didn’t use the clear Pyrex pie plate, but the white pie plate and all that white I was seeing was just the pie plate. So who knows if the pie crust is baking in there. I guess we’ll find out tomorrow/ today.
Anyhow, it’s been a really packed week so far. The two older kids have had very minimal school this week. Monday and Tuesday half days and today (Wednesday) completely off. Then of course tomorrow is Thanksgiving and Friday is off.
I think we all realize that the holidays are coming and we try to pack so much into the time between Thanksgiving and Christmas, so we kept things low key last weekend. There was house puttering on Saturday, then dinner out with friends. We went to the same brewery that I had gone to earlier that week with my Mom’s Group. I don’t drink, but the brewery has firepits, so that was a plus. There were only two other groups sitting outside, which made me feel less awful about our combined six kids running around the patio.
Sunday the three year old had two birthday parties to go to, both of them outdoors in 40 degree weather. One party had chicken fingers, French fries, and mac and cheese, which I thought was brilliant for a toddler party. It was probably on the cold side to be having an outdoor party, but I figured at least it would be an opportunity to to check more boxes off my 1000 Hours Outside goal. Two birthday parties in one day might not seem low key, but they were both park parties nearby, so they were pretty easy to get to.
Then there is the issue of sleep. Or rather being tired. I’ve been feeling pretty tired lately even though I’ve been getting 6-7 hours of sleep a night. Thoughts on this:
– Maybe I’m still catching up from daylights savings having ended? And the shorter spans of sunlight certainly don’t help my lethargy.
– It’s not because I’m staying up til 2am or 3am like I tend to when I’m working. I’ve actually been really good about mindfully going to bed, as opposed to falling asleep on the couch and stumbling to my room at 3am. So yay me.
-It is partly because the three year old is not proving to be a great sleeper. I mean she sleeps like a rock for three hours at a time – you can roll her over without waking her when she is asleep. But inevitably at some point between 1am and 3am, she gets out of bed and comes to our room and climbs into our bed. Then it’s an internal battle of whether I should take her back to her own bed and spend another half an hour getting her to sleep, or if I should just give up and let her sleep in my bed. Usually the latter wins out. But she also will be up sometime around 5am yelling for breakfast. Or Milk. Full confession, the three year old still nurses to sleep. Which I have mixed feelings about, but also some degree of apathy because it seems like my feelings on the matter do not even compare to her feelings.
-Also, related to the not going to bed late … part of going to bed early is that I get up earlier. And when I’m awake earlier, I then get tired earlier and then fall asleep earlier. It’s kind of a viscous cycle. I do like the idea of being a morning person, but I can’t really be a morning lark and a night owl.
– There is a possibility that I’m coming down with something. I did have a cold sore this week that was so painful I woke up a few times. I get cold sores maybe once or twice a year – usually a combination of hormones, weather, and stress makes them appear. But they’ve always been mild. This time was pretty painful. And there’s general nasal congestion and everyone else is getting sick – we seem to be in a perpetual state of snot and cough. Makes these next five days with no school or work seem like an ideal time to attempt to keep ourselves germ free.
Two months ago I wrote about my attempts to get more sleep, which is admittedly not the same issue exactly as just feeling run down and tired. But revisiting those ideas – Some of the goals I’ve managed to do – I now brush my teeth and get into pjs when the kids do. I got a lamp for next to my bed so I’m reading more hard copy books before bed, though the occasional e-book does make it too. So now it is much easier to stumble straight into bed at 9pm after the baby falls asleep.
I have not established any kind of bedtime routine – mostly because of having to lie down with the baby until she falls asleep. So my ideal evening wind down of 20 mins yoga, 20 mins journaling and 20 mins reading hasn’t come to fruition. I have been doing 10-15 minutes of yoga in the morning, so at least I’m stretching that way. Maybe I should concentrate on 20 mins journaling and 20 mins reading in the evening.
Welp the pie is done (I hope) and I can hear the baby crying. So off to tend to that.
The Husband and the kids left on Friday and came back Monday night. Since I was working Monday night, that meant four whole days child free for me. Wow. I don’t think I’ve had that much child-free time since the days when I used to travel for work. Anyhow, it was a really relaxing and quiet four days. I slept late, had breakfast out on the back patio, wore my pajamas all day practically, spent too much time scrolling idly… I did work all day Friday, had Saturday off, then worked Sunday evening and Monday afternoon and evening/night. And in between – I think I did pretty well on my aspirations:
– Wash my bras. Done! and they fit much better now. But I still do need new bras… I should look into if the company that makes these favorite nursing bras also make a non-nursing option. – Pick up the house. Done! Mostly. and, it was infinitely less stressful for me to do it by myself than to monitor while my kids did it. I just put on a podcast or streamed some This is Us and tidied. It almost felt like enjoyable puttering rather than manic cleaning because it felt so relaxed. – a yoga or a gentle strength workout video. Yes. Thank you Fitness Blender! – ten year old’s Halloween costume. Perpetual October task. Still not done. This need serious attention.Halloween is in less than a week!!!! –put oil in my car. Done! This took all of five minutes, but I hate doing it while the car is still warm from driving, and I never remember to do it until I’m actually driving my car. One of those super simple things that needs to be put on a to do list in order to get done. -sleepover with my friend. Yes! Such a wonderful cozy time. more on that below. -Hike and picnic with sleepover friend. Yes! –Work Sunday Night. Yes! Couldn’t very well not show up for that one. Our first rehearsal onstage with orchestra… Man oh man, this current show is LOUD. It’s German so lots of loud brassy music and loud consonant filled singing. But the sheer wall of sound is amazing. Sometimes I love my job. Getting blasted by an orchestra of sound is one of those times. –random internet chores – bills, activity sign ups, still on the quest for black shoes ish. Activity sign up. Still no shoes. Need to remember to pay the bills this week. Apparently I forgot to pay the gas bill last month. Ugh.
Breakfast on the patio.
My friend from college came over Saturday night and we went to see the movie Tar. (There’s an accent in there somewhere, but I haven’t figured out how to do that…). It’s about a conductor (Female. Interesting that I feel the need to mention that, but it is kind of an important take) whose career starts to unravel because of hubris and allegations of sexual harassment (those things are definitely related). The trailer is seriously misleading and makes the movie seem like some kind of horror/thriller movie. As we sat down, my friend, who is a huge classical music nerd, said to me, “I hope this movie isn’t like the trailer.” It wasn’t. The film was more of a provocative character study about the idea of power dynamics and the person we present to the world. It’s a little grim and dark, but there were funny moments and definitely a lot of juicy classical music world details
And I had popcorn and a Cherry Coke. I fully recognize that concessions at the movies are over-priced, but for me popcorn and soda is just part of the experience, so I will usually indulge.
There is one moment early on when Blanchett’s character talks about how a conductor is someone who controls time – they start the music, they stop the music, then they re-start it. It’s a powerful thought. But then a voice inside me said, “Yes, but even the conductor music acquiesce to the stage manager when time runs out and the rehearsal is over…” So there’s that.
Anyhow – a good film. Dark in places. Darkly funny in others. Great performances. And how awesome to see the backstage of the classical music world.
The next day my friend and I went hiking at Great Falls, on a trail that is called Billy Goat Trail. Specifically it’s Billy Goat Trail A. There is also B and C, and A is the most challenging. I had contemplated bringing the kids on this trail, but I had heard that it wasn’t recommended for really little kids, so I wanted to check it out myself. It was indeed a little difficult in places – the terrain is really rocky and follows along the Potomac river, and while I have no doubt the kids could handle it, some of the rocky terrain was really close the the edge of a drop off down to the River and I would be afraid of someone falling. I’m thinking I might wait until next spring to tackle it with the kids.
It was a gorgeous hike, and there was lots of fall colour to be seen:
see the rock climbers on the opposite side of the river!
We packed lunches which we ate perched high above the Potomac River. There’s something so nice about eating outside. I brought soy eggs (boiled eggs marinated in soy sauce and tea), hummus, guacamole, veggies, apple slices, and string cheese:
This was the toughest part of the climb – a fairly vertical stretch of cliff wall:
This is why it’s called the Billy Goat Trail.
Also loved seeing this heart in nature:
heart rock.
The hike took about two hours, though we went slow and stopped frequently to savor the views and have a snack. It also isn’t a very shady hike, so I think it’s best suited for fall or spring. I’m glad I went – it’s probably the area’s most famous hike, and I had never been. I feel so lucky that this National Park is less than thirty minutes away from me!
More beautiful fall nature pictures of the views along the way:
And my friend took this picture of me along one of the cliff edges. I often shy away from having pictures taken of myself, but I think it’s nice to have pictures once in a while to acknowledge where I’ve been and my very existence.
So a good combination of fun/personal/life admin tasks – which I think is important for me to feel like I’m using my “me” time well. If I had done all fun things, I would have felt the household tasks looming and then felt guilty and anxious for not getting it done. (I do feel a little anxious about the Hallowe’en costume, but I know it will get done.) And conversely, if I had only done the house tasks, I would have felt like I didn’t get to fill up my personal soul bucket. Also – getting to sleep in without anyone crawling into bed with me and demanding “Milk!!!!!” was glorious. I don’t love being in the house by myself, but I do resent when kids are constantly in my space. It’s a fine line.
My go-to Boba order – Oolong milk tea, no sugar, regular ice, half boba, half lychee jelly. Bliss.
This weekend started with a rough night of sleep -the highlight of which was a three year old getting into bed with me and taking her “not poopy” diaper off in bed around 3am. And of course, the diaper was indeed poopy. So was her bottom. I suppose a bleary eyed 3am diaper change these days is a good, almost nostalgic, reminder of those newborn days. Then there was the 5am insistence that she wanted breakfast. And even though I could hear the Husband awake and moving around in the kitchen, the three year old insisted that it had be be “Mommy breakfast, not daddy breakfast!” All my good intentions for better sleep hygiene are being sabotaged by a pint sized toddler.
The rest of the weekend felt very indulgent. We went to try out a new Hot Pot place for Saturday dinner. We haven’t been to Hot Pot since before the pandemic, and I feel like going to Hot Pot is kind of a barometer of our comfort level with COVID times. (For those who haven’t been – hot pot is an Asian dining format where you get a pot with a pot of broth over a burner at your table – either individual pots or one pot for the table – and the diners add meats and sea food, and veggies and noodles to their own preference. It is a great social meal and usually takes a couple hours to really do it right.) Not quite sure if Hot Pot is a rational barometer or not, to be honest. We didn’t go to one of those places with a conveyor belt that brought your food, but rather our Hot Pot foods were brought by waiters after we ordered it via iPad, so it wasn’t like other people in the restaurant were breathing on it. There was also a charming robot that delivered boba tea, though we didn’t get to try that out because it seemed to get stuck a lot. We just went to the tea shop next to the restaurant and got boba after dinner. Then there was a band playing out on the plaza outside the restaurant so we hung out and drank our boba and listened to music for a little bit while the kids ran around on the grass. We probably over did it a little as the three year old vomited on the sidewalk at one point. “Don’t step in my vomit!” she yelled to us cheerily afterwards. So I guess she was okay.
hot pot spreadSisters and noodles
Sunday, the eating tour continued because we decided to go to the Taiwanese breakfast place. Taiwanese breakfast features bowls of steaming soy milk – either sweetened with sugar, or savory with scallions and sesame oil – which we eat with large sticks of fried dough (“yo tiao”). Along with that we have scallion pancakes, dumplings, noodles, seaweed salads, edamame and mustard green salad, “dan bing” (egg pancakes)… So much food, but all of it is super tasty and comforting. And afterwards, because there was a tea shop just next door, I had my second boba tea of the weekend. Boba is definitely a treat for me and to have it twice in one weekend was extra special. The tea shop next to Taiwanese breakfast also happens to serve Taiwanese shaved ice which is softer and fluffier than the Western version, and is topped with different jellies and red bean and fruit. My dad had been wondering if there was a shaved ice place in our area, so I was glad to have found this place and have mentally bookmarked it for later.
After breakfast and boba, we went to buy new shoes and boots for the kids. Our favorite shoe place has a policy that if you buy snow boots in September or October, if it doesn’t snow more than an inch all winter, they will take the shoes back in April. It is definitely pricier to buy shoes at Shoe Train, but the service is really great. The shocker this time around is that the ten year old now wears the same size shoe as me! I wasn’t ready for that yet…
Once everyone had new shoes, I took the two little kids to the park since the weather was beautiful and I wanted to spend some time outside. Then in the evening, we went over to a friend’s house for dinner. We got take out Chipotle and pizza and just sat around and talked all evening. I also baked a pie. The Husband had been wanting to make a pie with some of the apples he had gotten from the market a few weeks ago, so I was determined to make it happen, but then forgot we were hanging out with friends that night. So I asked if we could bake the pie at their place and they said sure! I made the filling and dough at home – the kids helped – and then assembled the pie and baked it in my friend’s oven and we had pie for dessert.
Helping peel and slice the apples
So it felt like a very full weekend. I did not get to the ten year old’s Halloween costume, so I need to make that a priority for the next few weeks, for sure.
Other fun/ interesting/ thought-provoking things from last week:
-Monday was Indigenous People Day, but the kids still had school. Traditionally this day is an open house at school for the parents to come an observe the classroom. My dad has been in town visiting, so he came with. Having two kids in two different schools meant a bit of travel to see both kids’ classes, but the open house was all morning and we ended up spending forty-five minutes at each school.
I was interested to see the five year old’s French Immersion class, and I was impressed that it was truly full immersion. Even still, the kids all managed to behave and learn and follow directions. The teacher repeated herself a lot and did a lot of pointing and demonstrating. It’s only been two months of school, and the five year old can already count to ten in French, do some basic math, and he can introduce himself. He also used random French words at home – things like “sac à dos” (backpack) and “poubelle” (trash can). It kind of takes me back to when I learned French in elementary school. When I was I was growing up in Ontario, in my school district, everyone started learning French in Grade Three.
We then went to the five year old’s class where all the students were really well behaved and quiet. Not that these attributes should be the pinnacle of student behavior, but rather everyone seemed really engaged. The ten year old did say afterwards that people were on really good behaviour and sometimes the teacher has to ask more than once for students to do things.
-This week, I had a supertitle gig for a Vocal Recital. I procrastinated a little on getting the titles done so the morning of the concert, after the open houses, I went to a cafe and worked for several hours. Being able to sit and sip my chai and work seemed so indulgent. The concert itself was lovely. There was an interesting set of songs by Franz Liszt that I was unfamiliar with, but which were dramatic and sweeping and made me wonder what it would have been like if Liszt wrote an opera. And the nicest thing, is on my dinner break, I went to the Roof Terrace of the building and the sky was beautiful and the golden light bathed the Washington Monument in pink light.
Dinner time roof top stroll.
-Something that made me think this week: This podcast episode from the Puberty Podcast titled “How To Parent without Judgement”. I listened to this episode at a good time this week – it had come to my attention that that the ten year old feels like I judge her too much. Which is probably true. I have a lot of opinions, and I sometimes have a hard time hiding said opinions, even if it’s just the way my eyes widen and my eye brows go up when I hear or see something. Some musings from this podcast: – There is a great point about how we need to stop judging ourselves. There is a fine line between being self aware and self-flagellating ourselves. – Parenting without judging also encompasses judging other people. The hosts point out that when you express opinions on other people’s choices, your child will pick up on that and that will influence how they feel and talk about their own choices. -There was some great tips and box text for managing moments without judgement. One things they mentioned was not making it about making the child feel bad for their negative behaviour, but rather present it as a bigger picture. For examples, if a child is constantly snacking out of the package, instead of condemning that specific action, you can say, “Hey, I bought the snacks for the whole family to share. Why don’t we pour some in the bowl for you.” Also – they recommend giving kids (and yourself) time before you make suggestions or share thoughts. ie. don’t re-hash the game on the way home from the soccer field. (If at all, to be honest) – One issue that this episode brought up for me was about positive judgements. Often when we talk about juding someone, we are talking about having negative thoughts about them – but is having positive or complimentary thoughts also considered “judging”? I’ve saved this episode because I think I will need to often remind myself of the many wise points. Speaking of which, this made me laugh this week:
– I bought more masks this week. As I hovered on the webpage, I was struck with the dilemma of how many masks to buy. It is cheaper to buy more, but will the we still need masks in two months? Three months? I still have to wear a mask at work. The three year old still wears a mask at daycare. Masks are optional for the two kids in elementary school, but the five year old still prefers to wear a mask (“I don’t want to get sick,” he says.) The ten year old prefers to go without. Plus, the masks we found that work best for the kids just started releasing kids masks in fun bold colours… Spring of 2020 and the start of COVID impacting our lives sometimes seems very distant to me. Yet here I am two and a half year later and buying face masks is just another part of the life maintenance routine. At the beginning, I didn’t know what kind of masks to get and spent so much time sewing masks trying to find the perfect fit. Now I know what masks I like to get for the kids, and from which website. If they had a subscribe and save feature, I’d be all signed up. Funny how we adapt and adjust.
-I managed to bike to work three times. And by the end of the week, I biked all the way up the hill that I had walked up last week. Progress. Going uphill is still hard as f***, though.
Brisk fall day on my bike. Perfection.
-We head into tech at the end of this week. As always, my life goals for tech week: *eat healthy nourishing food. (Mostly. I mean there is a lot of unhealthy snacking that goes on too, but as long as I’m also eating the healthy stuff, I’m okay with this.) *Run on my dinner breaks. *Sleep when I get home late at night instead of scrollling *Help the Husband fold a basket or two of laundry whenever I can. Work goals: Stay calm, stay organized, stay on top of things, and be nice.
And as a last note – Angela Lansbury passed away last week. When I was a child we watched Murder She Wrote every Sunday night. And then as I got older, I grew to love her satirical edge in musicals like Sweeney Todd and Anyone Can Whistle. I love this quote from her Washington Post obituary.
The lady knew her priorities lay in her strengths. Or maybe her strengths lay in her priorities?
What We Ate: Saturday: I worked, the Husband made something that involved green beans and stir fry, I believe.
Sunday: We had been planning on eating out, but we had gone hiking so the Husband made tortellini, salad and garlic bread.
Monday: Mac and Cheese (from the blue box) and sausages. The Husband cooked because I was working.
Tuesday: Not sure – I was working.
Wednesday:Red Lentil Soup in the Instant Pot. Continuing my attempts to clean out the pantry. Vegan.
Thursday: The Husband cooked – Fried Tofu Sandwiches. This was an interesting recipe because it involved marinating the tofu in pickle juice. We had tofu to use up and the Husband googled “Tofu Recipes” and specifically looked for one that did not involve stir frying or Asian cuisine.
This week was prep week for a new show. Prep week is always a more relaxed because I can pretty much set my own hours as long as I get my work done – I’m not bound by a daily rehearsal schedule. Ironically, though, this week didn’t get a lot of my “me” tasks check off because I used a lot of my work flexibility to take care of kid stuff – there were a few school bus pick ups that I took for the Husband, an appointment for one kid, and the baby had an Open House at her daycare.
This all meant leaving the office early, but also meant I worked through lunch a lot so that I could leave early, and lunch is usually when I take my daily walk. I’m still trying to track my 1000 hours outside and this week I think I had two hours total. It’s a little ironic that when my day is dictated by the rehearsal schedule, I seem to have more time to slot in things like my daily walk and exercise. When my work life is more flexible, I feel like I have to fit in more family/ life admin stuff since that stuff is harder to fit in around my rehearsal schedule.
Some thoughts from this week:
– We had some fans installed this week – a bathroom fan (finally no steamy bathrooms post shower. Also good for the walls), a bedroom fan (just in time for 50 degree nights. hah!) and a wall fan in the kid’s room (because a ceiling fan was a bad idea given the bunk beds). One night this week, we left the kids home with my mom who is visiting and the Husband and I went to Lowe’s to look at ceiling fans at 9pm. Date night, I guess. I was a little taken aback when I walked into Lowe’s and saw:
I’m not even ready for Hallowe’en yet!
– Out of the blue an old friend/work colleague reached out to me. We had done summer stock together twenty years ago when we were both fresh out of college, and then taken a couple of those road trips one does when one finishes a gig and is twenty and unemployed and has nothing better to do than see how far you can get on a tank of gas. Our professional paths crossed fortuitously in the years that followed, but then he got a teaching job at a University and I stopped travelling as much so we fell out of each other’s orbits. Anyhow, it was lovely to talk to him and catch up and see where we’ve each landed. It’s funny, when you’re twenty and starting out in opera and have thoughts of all the big companies and big ideas you want to work for, and then what you find you wants when you’re forty is a spouse and a home and to come home and cook dinner for them.
– Speaking of which… Listening to this Squiggly Careers podcast episode about how to take control of your career.
This has somewhat been on my mind lately – there have been lots of changes at work and it’s not so much that I am questioning if I want to be where I am, but it’s more that I’m wondering if there is anything wrong with wanting to want to be where I am. That’s to say, I think personally I am in a place right now where I don’t want to travel and gig and where I want to be able to take my kids to the school bus and snuggle with the Husband on the couch at night; to do that, perhaps I am giving up some career ambitions. And I’m okay with that mostly, but when I work with people who are doing the constant gig and hustle, I do think about how different my life is from that. I am definitely a little jealous of those stage managers who get to to take a show to Europe, but those opportunities don’t happen overnight – they come out of cultivating relationships long terms, and while pre-kids – pre-marriage, really- I might have been able to invest myself in developing relationships that might grow into an international career, it’s not something I can come to as easily now. I think there is taking control from a point of making career things happen, and taking control in terms of being happy where one is. And I’m in the latter. I know there’s a world of new technologies and ideas in companies across the world, and it’s been really fascinating these past few weeks learning about how different people work. In a way, the changes at my company mean that new ideas come to me rather than than I go to them. Is it a complacent place to be? Maybe. I think that’s okay for now, though. The podcast hosts did have one self-reflective exercise in the podcast that I liked – Take five minutes and finish this sentence in as many ways as possible: “Wouldn’t my career be amazing if….” That might be a good exercise for me to ponder.
-A shout out to Kae’s post “If you See Something Say Something” on taking time to express gratitude to others. I was inspired to write to my daughter’s swim team coach from this summer. The guy was just did so much to build skills and team spirit with the swim team kids this past summer, and I had been meaning to write him since August, but never did. So prompted by Kaelyn’s post, I did. It reminds me of the unit in the Happiness Course (aka Yale’s class called The Science of Well Being) that talks about gratitude, and one of the assignments was to write a gratitude letter – something I think I can think about and execute more regularly, I think.
On the aspiration docket this rainy rainy weekend – We were going to go apple picking, but the weather does not look ideal for that. It’s my last two day weekend in a while, so my weekend aspirations are trying to maximize family time and also life admin items: – skating lessons for the five year old. Swim clinic for the ten year old – Attic clean out -Ten year old’s Halloween costume. Manageable chunk – maybe we will design and get supplies. – going to a play then dinner out as a family. – Supertitle work for my next titles gig. – Seasonal sort and cycle the kids clothes. The weather’s getting cooler so I need to make sure we are set for long sleeve shirts, sweaters, and pants. -meal plan and grocery shop for next week. – try to squeeze in some outdoor time between bouts of rain. – maybe an afternoon of hanging out and watching a movie on the couch.
What We Ate: Saturday: This was the three year old’s birthday dinner at a local Mexican restuarant.
Sunday: Kitchen sink ramen. Ramen with whatever veggies I needed to use up thrown in.
Monday: Butternut squash flatbread from Milk Street’s Tuesday Night Mediterranean. I pre-made the filling and chopped some cucumbers to eat on the side so the Husband just had to fill the tortillas and pan fry them when he got home. This was quite tasty. Vegan, with optional cheese. I did grill the leftover halloumi to go with it – I’ve never done that before, and it was quite tasty.
Tuesday: White bean and tomato stew from Bare Minimum Dinners. This meal was kind of brilliantly simple – cannellini beans, garlic, tomato paste, water, ditilani pasta. On the Husband’s suggestion I made a double batch and the ten year old took it for lunch in her thermos all week. Vegan, except some people added cheese.
Wednesday: Mushroom and Grape Tartines from Milk Street Tuesday Night Mediterranean, with a quick panzella salad on the side. I was originally going to make a greek salad, but part of the tartine recipe called for hollowing out the baguettes so I decided to make a panzella salad with the bread pulled from the baguettes. That felt like a really frugal food decision!
Thursday: My mother made chicken wings and stir fry. Thank goodness because Thursday night was pretty activity heavy.
Friday: Pizza and Movie – we watched Thirteen Lives, a movie from this year about the Thai cave rescue. Overall a really gripping movie – the story is so tense, even though I knew the outcome. I do wish the movie had devoted more time to the story of the boys in the cave and how they managed, though I imagine twelve boys surviving by meditation sessions led by their coach might not make for gripping drama the way cave diving does. I also didn’t love the kind of “white savior” aspect of a bunch of white men saving a group of Thai boys, but in truth when one looks at any kind of high risk elite activity like cave diving, then the socio-economic truths of it is that it is indeed a white man’s game. For a podcast version of the story, we really loved the first season of the podcast Against the Odds which looked at the story over six episodes. The kids were captivated by this podcast.
And afternoon at the Theatre! Photo taken by my cousin 🙂
The last weekend in September!
Our big weekend adventure was going to see Hamilton. I had bought tickets last spring so this had been on the calendar for a while. I took the ten year old and the five year old and my cousin. It was the five year old’s first time big theatre experience, so I was really excited to see what he thought. He loves listening to Hamilton and can sing large chunks of it. And when we pray at dinner, he still says at the end, “And God please bless Hamilton’s son, Philip.” The ten year old has been going to the theatre since she was three when she would come watch rehearsals while I worked. She really loves going, and it’s definitely something that I enjoy doing with her.
Not throwin’ away their shot!
There is a quote in Kevin Wilson’s novel Nothing to See Here: “Maybe raising children was just giving them the things you loved most in the world and hoping that they loved them, too.” I think about this quote when I take my kids to the theatre. I was so obsessed with musicals – and later opera – when I was a tween, and this love of theatre led me to what I do today. I hope my kids love the theatre as much as I do, and even though I know they are their own people with their own thoughts and feelings, I’m sure a little part of me will be sad if they don’t love it too.
And truth. Even though the five year old seemed like he had a good time – he’s pretty stoic and reserved so it’s hard to gauge sometimes- afterwards when I asked him if he liked going to see a show, he said, “I’d rather run errands with Dad.” So there’s that.
Reading the program – a very important part of the theatre going experience.
Two things to get off my chest – 1) the show was really loud. I know that I’m used to working in opera where microphones aren’t usually used, but even so, I feel like the show was unnecessarily loud. It made it hard to hear the lyrics clearly sometimes, which is a shame because the words are such a big part of the show’s brilliance . I think I think this every time I see a big show, so it’s not specific to this experience. 2) We sat behind a really tall person, and it was hard to see some of the action onstage. I know, not anyone’s fault, but it was slightly annoying to have to shift in my seat to be able to see who was singing. His party of four or five people was also late getting back at intermission and they had to cross in front of us to get back to their seats, blocking our view of the first number And then he kept his hat on for about half of the second act. I was really irked. I haven’t been to see live theatre like this in so long that I’d somewhat forgotten how much being a part of an collective group of people is central to the experience of going to the theatre. The ten year old didn’t like the person she was sitting next to, so after intermission she swapped seats to sit behind the tall man, that being preferable to her.
On the flip side of the communal experience coin, though, the family sitting behind us was super friendly and before the show we chatted about whether or not we’d seen the show before and how their son had a soccer game right after – friendly idle chit chat, you know. They even told the five year old that he could sit up on his knees if he wanted to see better, and that it wouldn’t bother them or block their view. At the end of the show they complimented us on how well behaved he was, which is always nice to hear as a parent.
We had seen the version of Hamilton released on Disney+, so I knew what to expect in a lot of it. Even still, there is something I love about seeing the whole stage picture rather than close ups and whatever shot the film’s director wants you to see. So much of the choreography and staging features little moments on the second level of the set or in corners of the stage that you don’t see in the film. I think that was one of the things I was so impressed by – the show is so detailed and precise, and I think that is something that came across better watching the show live.
The five year old’s favorite thing was “The magic ceiling.” By which he meant the moment when the lanterns flew in from above to create the ballroom. There is something really dear to me that he called it “magic.” We often use the term “the magic of theatre” when we talk about stage tricks or illusions or even just simple hacks – things like a chandelier that looks amazing and full, but is really half the size and built in a way to skew perspective. Or a sponge of blood hidden on the set so the singer can smear it across their chest and pretend to be stabbed. Or decanter made of breakable sugar glass that shatters onstage at the right time, or a moment of lighting that makes the stage look like sunset. All these we call “magic” but the real magic for us is in the skill that it takes to think of and execute these things. For the five year old, however, a bank of lanterns descending out of the sky without any visible operator – he thinks that is truly magic.
The ten year old’s favorite part was the Schuyler Sisters. She also had some really insightful things to say about how this cast was different than the original cast, which I thought it was cool that she pays attention like that.
View of the Potomac and Georgetown.
After the show we had a bit of time, so we went back to the roof terrace and strolled around and enjoyed the view of the city. It’s one of my favorite places because you can see the Washington, Lincoln, and Jefferson Memorial from there and it feels so classic DC.
Running on the Roof Terrace
For dinner that night, we met up with the Husband, the newly minted three year old, and my mother at a Mexican restaurant. The food there is always tasty and the staff super friendly. I ordered the seafood soup, which come chock full of clams and shrimp and even half a lobster. So tasty and decadent. All that aside, the real reason we picked the restaurant is that they will sing to you on your birthday. I felt a little badly that I didn’t arrange a birthday party for the baby, so I thought this might be a festive way to celebrate. (or to continue celebrating. Believe me, there was a lot of cake eaten between Friday and Sunday.) The restaurant was super crowded and, as always happens, once the staff start singing Happy Birthday, everyone in the restaurant also started singing and cheering. It was a lot of fun. And she even got a free ice cream with a candle in it!
Birthday girl!Not sharing her ice cream.
After that fun filled day, Sunday was pretty chill. The ten year old had swimming clinic, and I took the five year old to meet a friend at the park with my cousin and the baby coming with. Then I took my cousin to the Metro station. A little sadly, because it had been so much fun to have her visit.
The rest of the day was pretty much relaxing and chores. I took a nap in our backyard while The Husband gardened, only to be woken up when it started to rain. Then the Husband and I left the kids at home with my mom and went grocery shopping, which is what counts as a date these days, I guess. The evening I made kitchen sink ramen for dinner – basically ramen with some odd and end veggies I had to use up – two heads of baby bok choy, some broccoli, carrots, and also some shrimp thrown in for protein. It was really tasty, and it allowed the kids the chance to use the learning chopsticks that my cousin had brought.
Chopstick skills!
I don’t remember how I learned to use chopsticks, but I don’t really use them correctly, for which my uncle is always teasing me. I hold the top chopstick between my middle and ring fingers, but one is supposed to use the pointer and middle fingers. My method works for me, but it does look slightly awkward.
I hadn’t thought about teaching my kids to use chopsticks because I figured, “I’m not using them correctly, I don’t know how to teach my kids to do it right.” We’ve had learning chopsticks before for the ten year old but they didn’t quite stick and now she sort of has figured out her own method, which involves a lot of stabbing and scooping. The learning chopsticks my cousin brought are great because they have loops where you put your fingers and the tops are attached, kind of making them like tongs, which is helpful when learning. Plus they are in the shape of Elsa, Rapunzel, and Spiderman. The kids were super excited to use them and a few time the past few days have requested “Chopstick meals.” Kitchen sink ramen, definitely fit the bill.
So a good weekend – a nice combination of something fun and something comfortingly mundane. And now I’m back at work, and it will be November before I have another two day weekend. Oh well, this was for sure a nice weekend.
I’ve been pondering what makes a weekend these days. When I am working, the weekends usually mean just Sunday since I often have rehearsals or shows on Saturday. And then there are the other typical weekend activities – lessons for the kids, batch cooking, birthday parties, trip downtown to a museum, sometimes even a day trip, football in front of a tv or with friends, social gatherings, church. These are often activities the Husband takes on, ref: stage managers work on Saturdays. (Sometimes I work on Sundays too, but usually I get one or the other off.)
Needless to say most of these activities are now frowned upon. But we did do some “weekend” type things these past two days. We celebrated birthdays: We drove by the houses of two friends whose kids had birthdays this week. We brought noisemakers and percussion instruments and yelled and sang happy birthday and then visited for a little bit – us sitting in our cars, and them standing in their driveway or on their sidewalks.
I took the kids on a walk down our local trail. The County has closed the road next to the trail to traffic on weekends so people can walk on the road, making social distancing along the trail more practical. It had just rained and there were plenty of puddles and mud. “We went on a muddy walk!” the three year old declared.
Husband made a big batch of chili. I get to batch bake/cook during the week, so Saturday was his day in the kitchen.
We went to church – which now means gathering in the basement for the livestream of 9am Mass. We actually “went” twice because there were technical difficulties the first time, so we streamed other services in the morning. But then we decided that we liked the atmosphere of our home church best, and we came back at 2pm when the Church had everything worked out.
We didn’t go out to the theatre, but we did stream the first half of Twelfth Night from London’s National Theatre. Despite working in the arts, I don’t see a whole lot of theatre, so I’ve been loving this series of performances. There is a flexibility and agility to theatre – both the performances and the technical aspects – that I don’t get to necessarily experience in my own work.
We cleaned. I’ve been trying to get the eight year old to clean. She now does bathrooms and windows. Somewhat imperfectly and slowly, but it’s a start. The slowness might be tied to the fact that she gets to listen to an audiobook while she cleans. Then also, on her own, she cleaned her room, including sweeping and vacuuming. When I exclaimed my surprise and delight, she said, “Well, when there is nothing else to do, you can always clean.” Not really my philosophy, but I’m glad it’s hers.
So I guess any one of these things can be done each day, but the weekend was marked by doing all of them. And also the fact that my husband didn’t work. That was nice too. We have certainly been having a lot of family time during the week these days, but I have to say as nebulous as a “weekend” is right now, it still brings on a different quality of family time.
